"Andrew W" <nospaam_ajwerner@optushome.com.au> wrote in message news:<407bbb65$0$25661$afc38c87@news.optusnet.com.au>...
Ah, time for some smartassed remarks. :)
20 favourite christian rebukes and sayings.
1/ Why do you limit God and His abilities?
He was getting out of hand so I gave him a time out.
2/ You are quoting the bible out of context.
Actually I'm quoting The Story of O. Do pay attention.
3/ You shouldn't attack things you know nothing about.
But it's more fun, that way.
4/ God is God. He can do anything he wants.
It's also His party and He'll cry if He wants to.
5/ Why do you choose to serve Satan?
He tips well.
6/ Because you are evil you believe only Satan's lies.
That's not true. He claims that he returned my rake, the liar!
7/ Why do you hate God so much?
It's best not to do things by half measures, don't you think?
8/ Only those who have God's spirit within them can understand the
scriptures.
And only those who have God's spitit within them are eligible for 5% off at Stukys.
9/ To a follower of Satan everything God says seems like foolishness.
To a follower of Vishnu, everything God says seems like a palindrome.
10/ Only whom God has chosen will see his glory.
God should keep his "glory" in his raincoat.
11/ How can you say that if you haven't even read the bible?
Mysterious psychic powers.
12/ The holy spirit has prevented any errors form going into the bible.
It's also prevented any women from going to the Masters.
13/ God knows exactly what your sins are.
I know. I have the reciept.
14/ God is just and righteous. His punishment is perfect justice.
Followed by Perfect Justice II: The Redeemer.
15/ Why do you insist on disobeying God?
I don't insist on it, I just find it convenient.
16/ Yes God is vengeful and he created evil. So what? He's God.
Yes, God wears white after Labor Day. So what? He's God.
17/ God created EVERYTHING, but you being blind, evil and in darkness, can
only see what your evil nature allows you to see.
I see Bobby and Cindy and Mary-Lou...
18/ You are a sinner and you must accept Christ's sacrifice to be saved.
Can I just accept Christ Brand Bath Soap?
19/ Because you have chosen evil you deserve eternal torment.
Because you've chosen the Three Year Extended Warranty, you deserve eternal mocking.
20/ We are all sinners. Do you think you are without sin?
I hope not!
Christianity is very strange. Eating one fruit from a tree is a sin which
deserves a death sentence but killing the only son of God is not and is
instead celebrated.
Indeed. :)
--
Andrew Lias
http://andrewlias.blogspot.com
.
