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Topic: Religions > Atheism
User: "Fredric L. Rice"
Date: 29 May 2004 11:18:17 AM
Object: A joke
One sunny day in 2005 an old man approached the White House from across
Pennsylvania Avenue, where he'd been sitting on a park bench. He spoke to
the U. S. Marine standing guard and said, "I would like to go in and meet
with President Bush."
The Marine looked at the man and said, "Sir, Mr. Bush is no longer
president and no longer resides here."
The old man said, "Okay" and walked away.
The following day, the same man approached the White House and said to the
same Marine, "I would like to go in and meet with President Bush."
The Marine again told the man, "Sir, as I said yesterday, Mr. Bush is no
longer president and no longer resides here." The man thanked him and,
again, just walked away.
The third day, the same man approached the White House and spoke to the
very same U. S. Marine, saying "I would like to go in and meet with
President Bush."
The Marine, understandably agitated at this point, looked at the man and
said, "Sir, this is the third day in a row you have been here asking to
speak to Mr. Bush. I've told you already that Mr. Bush is no longer the
president and no longer resides here. Don't you understand?"
The old man looked at the Marine and said, "Oh, I understand. I just love
hearing it."
The Marine snapped to attention, saluted, and said, "See you tomorrow."
---
Scientology tries to disrupt terrorist attacks relief efforts: http://www.cosvm.org/
George W. Bush's latest policy: "No Child Left Untortured Act."
.

User: "nu-monet v6.0"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 01:40:51 PM
A BETTER Joke:
This aging hippie goes up to the main entrance
of the White House and sneers at the US Marine
guarding the main gate, "Hey, you baby-killing
fascist thug, is that Nazi ***** *****
Nazi fascist Nazi ***** republican Nazi *****
fucker ***** Bush guy who stole the election
Nazi at home?"
And the Marine just looks at him and says,
"Get lost before I call the police."
So he spits at the Marine and flips him off and
calls him a "fascist ***** Nazi" a few
times while leaving.
--
I don't know what you're talking about.
I've never met you before in my life.
That story sounds like utter *****.
I wasn't there and it wasn't me.
I am *not* in denial. Shut up.
--nu-monet
.
User: "Fredric L. Rice"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 11:23:41 AM
"nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:
This aging hippie goes up to the main entrance of the White House and
sneers at the US Marine guarding the main gate, "Hey, you baby-killing
fascist thug, is that Nazi ***** ***** Nazi fascist Nazi
***** republican Nazi ***** fucker ***** Bush guy who stole the
election Nazi at home?"
And the Marine just looks at him and says,
"Get lost before I call the police."
So he spits at the Marine and flips him off and calls him a "fascist
***** Nazi" a few times while leaving.

Er, interesting but not as funny. And it doesn't tell us if he was
at home or not.
I don't doubt that it happens every day with _any_ sitting President.
---
Scientology tries to disrupt terrorist attacks relief efforts: http://www.cosvm.org/
George W. Bush's latest policy: "No Child Left Untortured Act."
.

User: "Fredric L. Rice"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 11:23:43 AM
"nu-monet v6.0" <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:
This aging hippie goes up to the main entrance of the White House and
sneers at the US Marine guarding the main gate, "Hey, you baby-killing
fascist thug, is that Nazi ***** ***** Nazi fascist Nazi
***** republican Nazi ***** fucker ***** Bush guy who stole the
election Nazi at home?"
And the Marine just looks at him and says,
"Get lost before I call the police."
So he spits at the Marine and flips him off and calls him a "fascist
***** Nazi" a few times while leaving.

Er, interesting but not as funny. And it doesn't tell us if he was
at home or not.
I don't doubt that it happens every day with _any_ sitting President.
---
Scientology tries to disrupt terrorist attacks relief efforts: http://www.cosvm.org/
George W. Bush's latest policy: "No Child Left Untortured Act."
.

User: "Yang, AthD \h.c"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 12:50:42 PM
An EVEN BETTER Joke:
This frail old women goes up to the main entrance of
the White House and asked to see President Bush.
When asked by the marine to mans the gate why, she said:
"Why did my son die for a NeoCon lie in Iraq?"
And the Marine just looks at her and says: "I'll see you at
funeral, mom. I'll bring my brother's personal
belongings to the funeral too."
--
Yang
a.a. #28
AthD (h.c.) conferred by the regents of the LCL
a.a. pastor #-273.15, the most frigid church of Celcius nee Kelvin
EAC Econometric Forecast and Socerey Division
Proudly plonked by Lani Girl and Crazyalec
The Bush 'balanced' budget: 1.3 trillion and worsening
The Bush 'economic' policy: -3 million jobs and counting
The Bush Iraq lie: -809GIs, one friend's co-worker's son and mounting
Having Bush ***** up my country: Worthless
.

User: "Puck Greenman"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 04:57:28 AM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, "nu-monet v6.0"
<nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

This aging hippie goes up to the main entrance
of the White House and sneers at the US Marine
guarding the main gate, "Hey, you baby-killing
fascist thug, is that Nazi ***** *****
Nazi fascist Nazi ***** republican Nazi *****
fucker ***** Bush guy who stole the election
Nazi at home?"

And the Marine just looks at him and says,
"Get lost before I call the police."

So he spits at the Marine and flips him off and
calls him a "fascist ***** Nazi" a few
times while leaving.

An EVEN BETTER Joke.
!PLONK!
.

User: "Kate "

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 03:37:35 PM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, "nu-monet v6.0"
<nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

This aging hippie goes up to the main entrance
of the White House and sneers at the US Marine
guarding the main gate, "Hey, you baby-killing
fascist thug, is that Nazi ***** *****
Nazi fascist Nazi ***** republican Nazi *****
fucker ***** Bush guy who stole the election
Nazi at home?"

And the Marine just looks at him and says,
"Get lost before I call the police."

So he spits at the Marine and flips him off and
calls him a "fascist ***** Nazi" a few
times while leaving.

So was he at home?
.

User: "raven1"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 02:51:11 PM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, "nu-monet v6.0"
<nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

This aging hippie goes up to the main entrance
of the White House and sneers at the US Marine
guarding the main gate, "Hey, you baby-killing
fascist thug, is that Nazi ***** *****
Nazi fascist Nazi ***** republican Nazi *****
fucker ***** Bush guy who stole the election
Nazi at home?"

And the Marine just looks at him and says,
"Get lost before I call the police."

So he spits at the Marine and flips him off and
calls him a "fascist ***** Nazi" a few
times while leaving.

Tell me, do you kiss your mother with that potty mouth?
.
User: "Joe Cosby http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 04:56:35 PM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 19:51:11 GMT, raven1 <quoththeraven@nevermore.com>
wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, "nu-monet v6.0"
<nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

This aging hippie goes up to the main entrance
of the White House and sneers at the US Marine
guarding the main gate, "Hey, you baby-killing
fascist thug, is that Nazi ***** *****
Nazi fascist Nazi ***** republican Nazi *****
fucker ***** Bush guy who stole the election
Nazi at home?"

And the Marine just looks at him and says,
"Get lost before I call the police."

So he spits at the Marine and flips him off and
calls him a "fascist ***** Nazi" a few
times while leaving.


Tell me, do you kiss your mother with that potty mouth?

No, his mother is the marine gaurd.
God, don't you guys get ANYTHING?
--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.com/
"I fear we are not getting rid of God because we still believe in
grammar."
--Friedrich Nietzsche (1889)

.
User: "Vic Sagerquist"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 11:43:02 PM
One day in alt.atheism, Also Sprach Joe Cosby:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 19:51:11 GMT, raven1 <quoththeraven@nevermore.com>
wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, "nu-monet v6.0"
<nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

This aging hippie goes up to the main entrance
of the White House and sneers at the US Marine
guarding the main gate, "Hey, you baby-killing
fascist thug, is that Nazi ***** *****
Nazi fascist Nazi ***** republican Nazi *****
fucker ***** Bush guy who stole the election
Nazi at home?"

And the Marine just looks at him and says,
"Get lost before I call the police."

So he spits at the Marine and flips him off and
calls him a "fascist ***** Nazi" a few
times while leaving.


Tell me, do you kiss your mother with that potty mouth?


No, his mother is the marine gaurd.

God, don't you guys get ANYTHING?

Laid, is what we get.
--
Vic Sagerquist
aa#2011
Supervisor, EAC Department of little adhesive-backed "L" shaped
chrome-plastic doo-dads to add feet to Jesus fish department
______________
It's my funeral and I'll fry if I want to...
.
User: "Joe Cosby http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 01:24:08 AM
On Sun, 30 May 2004 04:43:02 GMT, Vic Sagerquist
<address@withheld.com> wrote:

Tell me, do you kiss your mother with that potty mouth?


No, his mother is the marine gaurd.

God, don't you guys get ANYTHING?


Laid, is what we get.

Well the marines are there to serve.
--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.com/
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
Who struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury ,
Signifying nothing.
The Scottish Play. Act V, Scene V

.
User: "raven1"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 11:28:27 AM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 23:24:08 -0700, Joe Cosby
<http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl> wrote:

On Sun, 30 May 2004 04:43:02 GMT, Vic Sagerquist
<address@withheld.com> wrote:

Tell me, do you kiss your mother with that potty mouth?


No, his mother is the marine gaurd.

God, don't you guys get ANYTHING?


Laid, is what we get.


Well the marines are there to serve.

"This is my rifle, this is my gun;
This is for fighting, this is for fun!"
.


User: "Candlemoth"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 10:45:16 AM
Vic Sagerquist wrote:

One day in alt.atheism, Also Sprach Joe Cosby:


On Sat, 29 May 2004 19:51:11 GMT, raven1 <quoththeraven@nevermore.com>
wrote:


On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, "nu-monet v6.0"
<nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:


A BETTER Joke:

This aging hippie goes up to the main entrance
of the White House and sneers at the US Marine
guarding the main gate, "Hey, you baby-killing
fascist thug, is that Nazi ***** *****
Nazi fascist Nazi ***** republican Nazi *****
fucker ***** Bush guy who stole the election
Nazi at home?"

And the Marine just looks at him and says,
"Get lost before I call the police."

So he spits at the Marine and flips him off and
calls him a "fascist ***** Nazi" a few
times while leaving.


Tell me, do you kiss your mother with that potty mouth?


No, his mother is the marine gaurd.

God, don't you guys get ANYTHING?



Laid, is what we get.

We do? Who's we?
.
User: "Vic Sagerquist"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 07:34:04 PM
One day in alt.atheism, Also Sprach Candlemoth:

Vic Sagerquist wrote:

One day in alt.atheism, Also Sprach Joe Cosby:


On Sat, 29 May 2004 19:51:11 GMT, raven1 <quoththeraven@nevermore.com>
wrote:


On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, "nu-monet v6.0"
<nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:


A BETTER Joke:

This aging hippie goes up to the main entrance
of the White House and sneers at the US Marine
guarding the main gate, "Hey, you baby-killing
fascist thug, is that Nazi ***** *****
Nazi fascist Nazi ***** republican Nazi *****
fucker ***** Bush guy who stole the election
Nazi at home?"

And the Marine just looks at him and says,
"Get lost before I call the police."

So he spits at the Marine and flips him off and
calls him a "fascist ***** Nazi" a few
times while leaving.


Tell me, do you kiss your mother with that potty mouth?


No, his mother is the marine gaurd.

God, don't you guys get ANYTHING?



Laid, is what we get.


We do? Who's we?



Not you.
--
Vic Sagerquist
aa#2011
Supervisor, EAC Department of little adhesive-backed "L" shaped
chrome-plastic doo-dads to add feet to Jesus fish department
______________
It's my funeral and I'll fry if I want to...
.




User: "Fredric L. Rice"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 11:23:42 AM
raven1 <quoththeraven@nevermore.com> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, "nu-monet v6.0"
<nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:
So he spits at the Marine and flips him off and
calls him a "fascist ***** Nazi" a few
times while leaving.

Tell me, do you kiss your mother with that potty mouth?

We all kiss his mother.
---
Scientology tries to disrupt terrorist attacks relief efforts: http://www.cosvm.org/
George W. Bush's latest policy: "No Child Left Untortured Act."
.


User: "TCS"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 01:58:15 PM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, nu-monet v6.0 <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

<snip lame garbage>
Get yourself a vocabulary.
.
User: "Therion Ware"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 01:03:52 PM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 13:58:15 -0500 in alt.atheism, TCS (TCS
<The-Central-Scrutinizer@p.o.b.o.x.com>) said, directing the reply to
alt.atheism

On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, nu-monet v6.0 <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

<snip lame garbage>

Get yourself a vocabulary.

Better yet, a punch line.
--
"Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You."
- Attrib: Pauline Reage.
Inexpensive VHS & other video to CD/DVD conversion?
See: <http://www.Video2CD.com>. 35.00 gets your video on DVD.
all posts to this email address are automatically deleted without being read.
** atheist poster child #1 ** #442.
.

User: "Frere Jean Bleu"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 02:39:52 PM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 13:58:15 -0500, TCS
<The-Central-Scrutinizer@p.o.b.o.x.com> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, nu-monet v6.0 <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

<snip lame garbage>

Get yourself a vocabulary.

Damn vocabulary salesmen.
I think he already has a dog eared copy of one. You'll find it in
between his copies of grammar and lexicon.
However, I'm in need of a good semantic. If you have one and the price
is right, I'm willing to do business.
Fr J B
.

User: "Joe Cosby http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 02:07:39 PM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 13:58:15 -0500, TCS
<The-Central-Scrutinizer@p.o.b.o.x.com> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, nu-monet v6.0 <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

<snip lame garbage>

Get yourself a vocabulary.

OOH! GOOD COMEBACK!
And useful too, you can reuse it for anything without even thinking.
Efficient.
--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.com/
"How is life treating you? Have rodents eaten your toes? One
hopes not. Welp I can't stand around madly bantering like this all
day."

.
User: "W. Syme"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 02:14:25 PM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 12:07:39 -0700, Joe Cosby
<http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 13:58:15 -0500, TCS
<The-Central-Scrutinizer@p.o.b.o.x.com> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, nu-monet v6.0 <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

<snip lame garbage>

Get yourself a vocabulary.


OOH! GOOD COMEBACK!

And that one's even better.
--
Prove all things; hold fast that which is good. (1 Thessalonians 5:21)
W. Syme (pseudonym), European, non-native English speaker, "soft" atheist.
Email will not be read.
.
User: "Artemia Salina"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 02:20:20 PM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 19:14:25 +0000, W.Syme wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 12:07:39 -0700, Joe Cosby
<http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 13:58:15 -0500, TCS
<The-Central-Scrutinizer@p.o.b.o.x.com> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, nu-monet v6.0 <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

<snip lame garbage>

Get yourself a vocabulary.


OOH! GOOD COMEBACK!


And that one's even better.

And THAT one's even MORE betterer,
but THIS one's the BESTEST!
NYAAAA!!
.
User: "Robibnikoff"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 08:38:31 PM
In article <pan.2004.05.29.19.20.18.78233@sheayright.com>, Artemia Salina
says...


On Sat, 29 May 2004 19:14:25 +0000, W.Syme wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 12:07:39 -0700, Joe Cosby
<http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 13:58:15 -0500, TCS
<The-Central-Scrutinizer@p.o.b.o.x.com> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, nu-monet v6.0 <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

<snip lame garbage>

Get yourself a vocabulary.


OOH! GOOD COMEBACK!


And that one's even better.


And THAT one's even MORE betterer,
but THIS one's the BESTEST!

NYAAAA!!

Ooooooh, I just squashed a mosquito on my monitor while reading this.
Robyn
Resident Witchypoo & EAC Spellcaster
#1557
.
User: "Artemia Salina"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 08:45:06 PM
On Sun, 30 May 2004 01:38:31 +0000, Robibnikoff wrote:

Ooooooh, I just squashed a mosquito on my monitor while reading this.

Well that's ok as long as you didn't squash it on the part that
I'D written! I'd never forgive you if you had.
.
User: "Vic Sagerquist"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 11:42:02 PM
One day in alt.atheism, Also Sprach Artemia Salina:

On Sun, 30 May 2004 01:38:31 +0000, Robibnikoff wrote:

Ooooooh, I just squashed a mosquito on my monitor while reading this.


Well that's ok as long as you didn't squash it on the part that
I'D written! I'd never forgive you if you had.

You should thank your god she didn't find this funny.
--
Vic Sagerquist
aa#2011
Supervisor, EAC Department of little adhesive-backed "L" shaped
chrome-plastic doo-dads to add feet to Jesus fish department
______________
It's my funeral and I'll fry if I want to...
.
User: "Robibnikoff"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 06:35:31 AM
In article <Xns94F8DCEE51944vicman@204.127.204.17>, Vic Sagerquist says...


One day in alt.atheism, Also Sprach Artemia Salina:

On Sun, 30 May 2004 01:38:31 +0000, Robibnikoff wrote:

Ooooooh, I just squashed a mosquito on my monitor while reading this.


Well that's ok as long as you didn't squash it on the part that
I'D written! I'd never forgive you if you had.


You should thank your god she didn't find this funny.

And, I didn't.
Robyn
Resident Witchypoo & EAC Spellcaster
#1557
.

User: "Artemia Salina"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 01:34:08 AM
On Sun, 30 May 2004 04:42:02 +0000, Vic Sagerquist wrote:

One day in alt.atheism, Also Sprach Artemia Salina:

On Sun, 30 May 2004 01:38:31 +0000, Robibnikoff wrote:

Ooooooh, I just squashed a mosquito on my monitor while reading this.


Well that's ok as long as you didn't squash it on the part that
I'D written! I'd never forgive you if you had.


You should thank your god she didn't find this funny.

"This," as in your post?
.
User: "Vic Sagerquist"

Title: Re: A joke 30 May 2004 07:33:01 PM
One day in alt.atheism, Also Sprach Artemia Salina:

On Sun, 30 May 2004 04:42:02 +0000, Vic Sagerquist wrote:

One day in alt.atheism, Also Sprach Artemia Salina:

On Sun, 30 May 2004 01:38:31 +0000, Robibnikoff wrote:

Ooooooh, I just squashed a mosquito on my monitor while reading
this.


Well that's ok as long as you didn't squash it on the part that
I'D written! I'd never forgive you if you had.


You should thank your god she didn't find this funny.


"This," as in your post?

I don't know. I'm trying to figure it out myself. Too much beer last
night.
--
Vic Sagerquist
aa#2011
Supervisor, EAC Department of little adhesive-backed "L" shaped
chrome-plastic doo-dads to add feet to Jesus fish department
______________
It's my funeral and I'll fry if I want to...
.





User: "Joe Cosby http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 02:36:34 PM
On Sat, 29 May 2004 15:20:20 -0400, Artemia Salina
<y2k@sheayright.com> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 19:14:25 +0000, W.Syme wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 12:07:39 -0700, Joe Cosby
<http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 13:58:15 -0500, TCS
<The-Central-Scrutinizer@p.o.b.o.x.com> wrote:

On Sat, 29 May 2004 11:40:51 -0700, nu-monet v6.0 <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote:

A BETTER Joke:

<snip lame garbage>

Get yourself a vocabulary.


OOH! GOOD COMEBACK!


And that one's even better.


And THAT one's even MORE betterer,
but THIS one's the BESTEST!

NYAAAA!!

No, YOU did!
--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.com/
A cat will blink when struck with a hammer.
- George Carlin

.






User: "Vic Sagerquist"

Title: Re: A joke 29 May 2004 11:38:17 PM
One day in alt.atheism, Also Sprach Fredric L. Rice:
<snip>
LOLOLOLOLOLOL
--
Vic Sagerquist
aa#2011
Supervisor, EAC Department of little adhesive-backed "L" shaped
chrome-plastic doo-dads to add feet to Jesus fish department
______________
It's my funeral and I'll fry if I want to...
.


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