a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.)



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Topic: Religions > Atheism
User: "Richo"
Date: 02 Jun 2005 12:50:46 AM
Object: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.)
A little humuor at the expense of certain dogmatic a-theists (you know
who you are).
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
As every good member of alt.atheism knows the prefix a- denotes the
negation or absence of whatever follows - it means "not" or "without".
As in asexual and asymmetric.
So for example the word asparagus is formed from a- (meaning without)
and sparagus.
I am just not sure quite yet what sparagus means.
Not that this is a problem.
If in the future someone comes up with a good, plausible sounding,
meaning of sparagus (say in 100 years time) then it will retro-actively
be true that asparagus has always meant not-sparagus.
That is an undeniable truth - and any one who questions it is obviously
a christian or a moron or more probably both.
The fact that dictionaries give meanings and etymologies for the word
asparagus that don't mention its formation from a- sparagus is of no
importance.
Anyone that suggests otherwise is obviously a stupid christian.
The fact that the word asparagus has been used for centuries to mean a
certain succulent green vegatable is uterly irrelavent.
It will mean the absence of sparagas (whatever sparagus means) - and it
will always have meant that - no matter what a mere dictionary asserts.
The fact that no one has used the word sparagus during the same period
is likewise of no significance.
Once someone comes up with a meaning for sparagus (one that *we*
a-theist's all agree on !) it is, will be and always will have been
true that asparagus is formed by prefixing a- to sparagus.
It is a *timeless* truth.
That is to say the truth that a-sparagus is formed from a- sparagus is
not denied by any mere reference to any historical fact - or by the
presentation of any evidence about its meaning or usage by actual
speakers and writers of english within history.
Thus it is spoken and thus we believe.
May the horn of her pink holiness spike the buttocks of all who dare
question this completely obvious and eternal truth.
Ah... Choo!
Cheers, Mark.
PS I couldn't have come up with all this wierdness myself - thank's to
all those who contributed - even if unwittingly (again you know who you
are and probably even recognize your "bits".)
.

User: "Mike Smith"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 08:06:50 AM
"Richo" <m.richardson@utas.edu.au> wrote:

A little humuor at the expense of certain dogmatic
a-theists (you know who you are).
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
As every good member of alt.atheism knows the
prefix a- denotes the negation or absence of whatever
follows - it means "not" or "without". As in asexual and
asymmetric.

Or a-pathetic?
Good post :-)
__________________________________________
ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ
Mike Smith | aa #1164 | Founder of SMASH
__________________________________________
ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ
Omnis tuus castra sunt inesse nos
.

User: "twillis"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 03:14:30 PM
I AM SPARAGUS!
.
User: "Barry Trotter"

Title: Re: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 03:29:12 PM
In the great debate about "Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only
wish it was.)" in alt.atheism, "twillis" <tdwillis@earthlink.net>
catapaulted the following boulder:

I AM SPARAGUS!

Argh!!
David Silverman F.L.A.H.N. aa #2208
.
User: "Robibnikoff"

Title: Re: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 03:30:28 PM
"Barry Trotter" <trotb02@hogwash.ac.uk> wrote in message
news:f0ru91pp8aao8pf5p4nqf6khsltaostvnn@4ax.com...

In the great debate about "Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only
wish it was.)" in alt.atheism, "twillis" <tdwillis@earthlink.net>
catapaulted the following boulder:

I AM SPARAGUS!

Argh!!

Hmmm, is that better than being the walrus? I wonder................ ;)
--
------
Robyn
Resident Witchypoo
#1557
Science doesn't burn people at the stake for disagreeing - Vic Sagerquist
.
User: "DanielSan"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 03:32:42 PM
Robibnikoff wrote:

"Barry Trotter" <trotb02@hogwash.ac.uk> wrote in message
news:f0ru91pp8aao8pf5p4nqf6khsltaostvnn@4ax.com...

In the great debate about "Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only
wish it was.)" in alt.atheism, "twillis" <tdwillis@earthlink.net>
catapaulted the following boulder:

I AM SPARAGUS!


Argh!!



Hmmm, is that better than being the walrus? I wonder................ ;)

Goo, goo, and g'joob, Robyn. Goo, goo, and g'joob. :-)
.
User: "Robibnikoff"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 07:08:18 PM
"DanielSan" <daniel-san@myrealbox.com> wrote in message
news:K1Kne.36137$GN3.597@trnddc04...

Robibnikoff wrote:

"Barry Trotter" <trotb02@hogwash.ac.uk> wrote in message
news:f0ru91pp8aao8pf5p4nqf6khsltaostvnn@4ax.com...

In the great debate about "Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only
wish it was.)" in alt.atheism, "twillis" <tdwillis@earthlink.net>
catapaulted the following boulder:

I AM SPARAGUS!


Argh!!



Hmmm, is that better than being the walrus? I wonder................ ;)


Goo, goo, and g'joob, Robyn. Goo, goo, and g'joob. :-)

My, aren't you a sweet talker! ;)
--
------
Robyn
Resident Witchypoo
#1557
Science doesn't burn people at the stake for disagreeing - Vic Sagerquist
.



User: "Bobby D. Bryant"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 03:51:20 PM
On Thu, 02 Jun 2005, Barry Trotter <trotb02@hogwash.ac.uk> wrote:

In the great debate about "Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only
wish it was.)" in alt.atheism, "twillis" <tdwillis@earthlink.net>
catapaulted the following boulder:

I AM SPARAGUS!


Argh!!

Is that a-rgh, "rghless"?
--
Bobby Bryant
Austin, Texas
.


User: "Barry Trotter"

Title: Re: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 03 Jun 2005 04:49:05 AM
In the great debate about "Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only
wish it was.)" in alt.atheism, "twillis" <tdwillis@earthlink.net>
catapaulted the following boulder:

I AM SPARAGUS!

I think we ruined your joke. Sorry.
All together now (OK, one at a time):
I'M SPARAGUS
David Silverman F.L.A.H.N. aa #2208
.
User: "Saul_Sabia"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 04 Jun 2005 04:36:00 AM

I AM SPARAGUS!

I think we ruined your joke. Sorry.
All together now (OK, one at a time):
I'M SPARAGUS

'Thou Art Sparagus.'
..... no, i said "art sparagus" not "asparagus"... no... no, no! don't!
i didn'....
*torn to bits by the hordes of intolerant evangelical sparagusians*
Saul
.

User: "jwk"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 03 Jun 2005 03:19:13 PM
Barry Trotter wrote:

In the great debate about "Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only
wish it was.)" in alt.atheism, "twillis" <tdwillis@earthlink.net>
catapaulted the following boulder:

I AM SPARAGUS!

I think we ruined your joke. Sorry.
All together now (OK, one at a time):
I'M SPARAGUS

Over yonder is da castle ofh ma fadder
.


User: "Richo"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 11:01:33 PM
twillis wrote:

I AM SPARAGUS!

Yes but are you merely a sparagus or THE sparagus?
8-)
Mark.
.
User: "FreeThink"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 03 Jun 2005 03:49:20 PM
Richo wrote:

twillis wrote:

I AM SPARAGUS!


Yes but are you merely a sparagus or THE sparagus?

8-)

Mark.

Don't be a sparagus apologist!
:-)
.
User: "DanielSan"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 03 Jun 2005 03:52:31 PM
FreeThink wrote:


Richo wrote:

twillis wrote:

I AM SPARAGUS!


Yes but are you merely a sparagus or THE sparagus?

8-)

Mark.



Don't be a sparagus apologist!

:-)

No, I'm Sparagus!
.
User: "FreeThink"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 05 Jun 2005 01:39:44 AM
DanielSan wrote:

FreeThink wrote:


Richo wrote:

twillis wrote:

I AM SPARAGUS!


Yes but are you merely a sparagus or THE sparagus?

8-)

Mark.



Don't be a sparagus apologist!

:-)


No, I'm Sparagus!

I'm Sparagus and so is my wife!
.





User: "chibiabos"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 10:41:48 AM
In article <1117691446.834461.176850@z14g2000cwz.googlegroups.com>,
Richo <m.richardson@utas.edu.au> wrote:

A little humuor at the expense of certain dogmatic a-theists (you know
who you are).
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

As every good member of alt.atheism knows the prefix a- denotes the
negation or absence of whatever follows - it means "not" or "without".
As in asexual and asymmetric.

So for example the word asparagus is formed from a- (meaning without)
and sparagus.
I am just not sure quite yet what sparagus means.

If you have ever visited alt.binaries.pictures.asparagus, you would
know the answer to this question.
-chib
--
Member of SMASH
Sarcastic Middle-aged Atheists with a Sense of Humor
(email: change out to in)
.

User: "Barry Trotter"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 02:56:41 AM
In the great debate about "a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it
was.)" in alt.atheism, "Richo" <m.richardson@utas.edu.au> catapaulted
the following boulder:

A little humuor at the expense of certain dogmatic a-theists (you know
who you are).
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

As every good member of alt.atheism knows the prefix a- denotes the
negation or absence of whatever follows - it means "not" or "without".
As in asexual and asymmetric.

So for example the word asparagus is formed from a- (meaning without)
and sparagus.
I am just not sure quite yet what sparagus means.

Not that this is a problem.
If in the future someone comes up with a good, plausible sounding,
meaning of sparagus (say in 100 years time) then it will retro-actively
be true that asparagus has always meant not-sparagus.
That is an undeniable truth - and any one who questions it is obviously
a christian or a moron or more probably both.

The fact that dictionaries give meanings and etymologies for the word
asparagus that don't mention its formation from a- sparagus is of no
importance.
Anyone that suggests otherwise is obviously a stupid christian.

The fact that the word asparagus has been used for centuries to mean a
certain succulent green vegatable is uterly irrelavent.
It will mean the absence of sparagas (whatever sparagus means) - and it
will always have meant that - no matter what a mere dictionary asserts.

The fact that no one has used the word sparagus during the same period
is likewise of no significance.
Once someone comes up with a meaning for sparagus (one that *we*
a-theist's all agree on !) it is, will be and always will have been
true that asparagus is formed by prefixing a- to sparagus.

It is a *timeless* truth.

That is to say the truth that a-sparagus is formed from a- sparagus is
not denied by any mere reference to any historical fact - or by the
presentation of any evidence about its meaning or usage by actual
speakers and writers of english within history.

Thus it is spoken and thus we believe.

May the horn of her pink holiness spike the buttocks of all who dare
question this completely obvious and eternal truth.

Ah... Choo!

Cheers, Mark.

PS I couldn't have come up with all this wierdness myself - thank's to
all those who contributed - even if unwittingly (again you know who you
are and probably even recognize your "bits".)

Sparagus doesn't exist. The simple proof of this is you just made it
up.
David Silverman F.L.A.H.N. aa #2208
.
User: "Saul_Sabia"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 03:26:32 AM

Sparagus doesn't exist. The simple proof of this is you just made it
up.

i would like to take this opportunity to emphatically deny the
existence of Sparagus.
i have never seen the existence of Sparagus, never felt its presence,
nor have i seen anything remotely plausible put forth by the followers
of Sparagus that might sway me otherwise.
Some of you might attribute my Asparagusism to how i was raised, or the
liberal (or conservative) political society of this country, but i
firmly assure you that i have arrived at this realization on my own,
with all due research, and in soundness of mind and body.
I will not be cowed by the threats of the Sparagusians! Clearly, their
words are merely candy-coated bars of guilt, meant to tempt the unwary
or weak-willed who will fall for their seductive and evil philosophy,
lose all cognitive powers, and become....
..... vegetables.
Saul
.
User: "Richo"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 06:51:41 AM
Saul_Sabia wrote:

Sparagus doesn't exist. The simple proof of this is you just made it
up.


i would like to take this opportunity to emphatically deny the
existence of Sparagus.

i have never seen the existence of Sparagus, never felt its presence,
nor have i seen anything remotely plausible put forth by the followers
of Sparagus that might sway me otherwise.

Some of you might attribute my Asparagusism to how i was raised, or the
liberal (or conservative) political society of this country, but i
firmly assure you that i have arrived at this realization on my own,
with all due research, and in soundness of mind and body.

I will not be cowed by the threats of the Sparagusians! Clearly, their
words are merely candy-coated bars of guilt, meant to tempt the unwary
or weak-willed who will fall for their seductive and evil philosophy,
lose all cognitive powers, and become....


.... vegetables.


Saul

very big grin.
8-)
Mark
.

User: "Jon."

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 12:10:14 PM
Saul_Sabia wrote:

Sparagus doesn't exist. The simple proof of this is you just made it
up.


i would like to take this opportunity to emphatically deny the
existence of Sparagus.

i have never seen the existence of Sparagus, never felt its presence,
nor have i seen anything remotely plausible put forth by the followers
of Sparagus that might sway me otherwise.

Some of you might attribute my Asparagusism to how i was raised, or the
liberal (or conservative) political society of this country, but i
firmly assure you that i have arrived at this realization on my own,
with all due research, and in soundness of mind and body.

I will not be cowed by the threats of the Sparagusians! Clearly, their
words are merely candy-coated bars of guilt, meant to tempt the unwary
or weak-willed who will fall for their seductive and evil philosophy,
lose all cognitive powers, and become....


.... vegetables.

Why do you hate Sparagus? Sparagus is Love!!1! Sparagus loves you,
whether you believe in Sparagus or not. Sparagus gave his only
begotten Rtichoke to die for your sins, and you hate him for it? I
will prey for you, my lost brother.
.
User: "Richo"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 10:32:32 PM
Jon. wrote:

Saul_Sabia wrote:

Sparagus doesn't exist. The simple proof of this is you just made it
up.


i would like to take this opportunity to emphatically deny the
existence of Sparagus.

i have never seen the existence of Sparagus, never felt its presence,
nor have i seen anything remotely plausible put forth by the followers
of Sparagus that might sway me otherwise.

Some of you might attribute my Asparagusism to how i was raised, or the
liberal (or conservative) political society of this country, but i
firmly assure you that i have arrived at this realization on my own,
with all due research, and in soundness of mind and body.

I will not be cowed by the threats of the Sparagusians! Clearly, their
words are merely candy-coated bars of guilt, meant to tempt the unwary
or weak-willed who will fall for their seductive and evil philosophy,
lose all cognitive powers, and become....


.... vegetables.


Why do you hate Sparagus? Sparagus is Love!!1! Sparagus loves you,
whether you believe in Sparagus or not. Sparagus gave his only
begotten Rtichoke to die for your sins, and you hate him for it? I
will prey for you, my lost brother.

Oh, well done that man!
8-)
Mark.
.

User: "JohnN"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 01:44:28 PM
Jon. wrote:

Saul_Sabia wrote:

Sparagus doesn't exist. The simple proof of this is you just made it
up.


i would like to take this opportunity to emphatically deny the
existence of Sparagus.

i have never seen the existence of Sparagus, never felt its presence,
nor have i seen anything remotely plausible put forth by the followers
of Sparagus that might sway me otherwise.

Some of you might attribute my Asparagusism to how i was raised, or the
liberal (or conservative) political society of this country, but i
firmly assure you that i have arrived at this realization on my own,
with all due research, and in soundness of mind and body.

I will not be cowed by the threats of the Sparagusians! Clearly, their
words are merely candy-coated bars of guilt, meant to tempt the unwary
or weak-willed who will fall for their seductive and evil philosophy,
lose all cognitive powers, and become....


.... vegetables.


Why do you hate Sparagus? Sparagus is Love!!1! Sparagus loves you,
whether you believe in Sparagus or not. Sparagus gave his only
begotten Rtichoke to die for your sins, and you hate him for it? I
will prey for you, my lost brother.

Please pray to Rtichoke to ask His Father, Sparagus, the Cosmic
Pollenater, to send the Divine Spirt, Rrowroot, to thicken your sauce.
JohnN
.

User: "Saul_Sabia"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 03:00:33 PM
ROTFLMAO!!!
Saul
.




User: "DanielSan"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 01:01:33 AM
Richo wrote:

A little humuor at the expense of certain dogmatic a-theists (you know
who you are).
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

As every good member of alt.atheism knows the prefix a- denotes the
negation or absence of whatever follows - it means "not" or "without".
As in asexual and asymmetric.

This is humorous, but not accurate. Not all words that begin with an a-
denote the lack of something.
Is "accurate" the lack of "ccurate"? Is "abominable" the lack of
"bominable"?
Nay, some words that begin with a- actually (lack of "ctually"?) mean
what the word that follows it. "Ascribe" means "to scribe", due to its
etymology which came from "ad" (to) and "scribere" (write).
The word "theos" existed in the Ancient Greek. "Theos" meant "god" and
"Atheos" meant "lack of god; godlessness".
No such etymology exists for words like asparagus. In fact, "asparagus"
is the original Latin spelling of the word and no "opposite" was ever
created. Therefore, to say that "asparagus" is the "lack of sparagus"
is humorous, but, like the majority of humor that exists today, totally
inaccurate.
"You know those black boxes that they put on airplanes? They're
supposedly indestructible? Why don't they make the WHOLE PLANE out of
that stuff?"
Humorous, but not accurate.
.
User: "Rick"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 11:40:17 AM
DanielSan wrote in message <1hxne.11362$615.6742@trnddc08>...

Richo wrote:

A little humuor at the expense of certain dogmatic a-theists (you know
who you are).
-------------------------------------------------------------------------

----


As every good member of alt.atheism knows the prefix a- denotes the
negation or absence of whatever follows - it means "not" or "without".
As in asexual and asymmetric.


This is humorous, but not accurate. Not all words that begin with an a-
denote the lack of something.

Is "accurate" the lack of "ccurate"? Is "abominable" the lack of
"bominable"?

Nay, some words that begin with a- actually (lack of "ctually"?) mean
what the word that follows it. "Ascribe" means "to scribe", due to its
etymology which came from "ad" (to) and "scribere" (write).

The word "theos" existed in the Ancient Greek. "Theos" meant "god" and
"Atheos" meant "lack of god; godlessness".

No such etymology exists for words like asparagus. In fact, "asparagus"
is the original Latin spelling of the word and no "opposite" was ever
created. Therefore, to say that "asparagus" is the "lack of sparagus"
is humorous, but, like the majority of humor that exists today, totally
inaccurate.

"You know those black boxes that they put on airplanes? They're
supposedly indestructible? Why don't they make the WHOLE PLANE out of
that stuff?"

Humorous, but not accurate.

I'm wondering what sshole means?
- Rick
.

User: "Richo"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 02:32:32 AM
DanielSan wrote:

Richo wrote:

A little humuor at the expense of certain dogmatic a-theists (you know
who you are).
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

As every good member of alt.atheism knows the prefix a- denotes the
negation or absence of whatever follows - it means "not" or "without".
As in asexual and asymmetric.


This is humorous, but not accurate. Not all words that begin with an a-
denote the lack of something.

Yeah?
Get outa town!
8-)

Is "accurate" the lack of "ccurate"? Is "abominable" the lack of
"bominable"?

Not bad, but I still think a-sparagus is funnier.
Er.. Danniel you *do* understand this is satire, right?
Satire doesnt have to be true - in the usual sense - it merely has to
resemble as closely as possible that which it satirises.
I didnt have to change very much at all to get my "argument" - I just
used the arguments made against me and changed the odd word here and
there.
So how close do my arguments mirror the arguments made about a-theism?
That's the only kind of "acurate" I am interested in here.
Cheers, Mark.
.
User: "DanielSan"

Title: Re: a-sparagus (Not quite O.T. - I only wish it was.) 02 Jun 2005 11:57:32 AM
Richo wrote:


DanielSan wrote:

Richo wrote:

A little humuor at the expense of certain dogmatic a-theists (you know
who you are).
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

As every good member of alt.atheism knows the prefix a- denotes the
negation or absence of whatever follows - it means "not" or "without".
As in asexual and asymmetric.


This is humorous, but not accurate. Not all words that begin with an a-
denote the lack of something.


Yeah?
Get outa town!
8-)


Is "accurate" the lack of "ccurate"? Is "abominable" the lack of
"bominable"?


Not bad, but I still think a-sparagus is funnier.

Er.. Danniel you *do* understand this is satire, right?

Satire doesnt have to be true - in the usual sense - it merely has to
resemble as closely as possible that which it satirises.
I didnt have to change very much at all to get my "argument" - I just
used the arguments made against me and changed the odd word here and
there.

So how close do my arguments mirror the arguments made about a-theism?
That's the only kind of "acurate" I am interested in here.

Cheers, Mark.

Sorry, I had a rough day yesterday; guess I wasn't in the mood for
satire. It's just that the joke about the "black boxes" I referenced is
a kind of joke that I just do not find funny and that's what I thought
of the "asparagus" joke. Anyway, forgive me.
.




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