| Topic: |
Religions > Atheism |
| User: |
"M.H. Torringjan" |
| Date: |
31 Jul 2003 08:44:46 PM |
| Object: |
AA: EAP - Argument against God's existence developed! |
EAP – Tom Schaffer, a philosophy professor at Harvard has
finally developed an objective, deductive proof of the non-existence
of God.
When asked to present the proof for reprinting, he replied that
contractual agreements prevented him from doing so until the book
containing the proof was published. However, he did release a
statement, which commented that he “never would have expected
Pauly Shore to play such a pivotal role in the process until he
plugged him in right around line 30.”
Although no public lectures on the proof have been scheduled, debates
in private have produced a 100% conversion rate in males aged 35-50
and a 97% (plus or minus 3%) rate in females aged 18-35 (the error
resulting from one woman who converted either as a result of the proof
or of the lack of refreshments during the meeting with Dr. Schaffer).
Naysayers around the world have been saying “nay” since
the initial announcement last week. “Somebody trying to say
that God doesn’t exist is just freaky!” remarked Albert, a
stoner on the corner outside of the EAP building, who insisted that he
had no last name. “I mean, really! Has he even *met*
God?” When informed that the answer was likely,
“no,” he replied, “See, that just proves my
point!”
God, meanwhile, could not be reached for comment on the subject.
Phone calls to any of the deity’s spokespeople were not
returned, but their answering machines wished is a good day and
reminded us that god does, in fact, love us.
M.H. Torringjan
Director, EAC Rubber Chicken, Rubber Check, Rubber Nipple, & Rubber
Prophylactic Department; #1859
BAAWA Wannabe
Visit my website! I like visitors!
http://www.geocities.com/mhtorringjan/MH-MSTings.htm
Homer: And this perpetual motion machine she made today is a joke! It
just keeps going faster and faster... Lisa! In this house, we obey
the laws of thermodynamics!
--"The PTA Disbands"
My feet hurt... WITH DESTINY!!!
(longest sig file and counting!)
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| User: "Josef Balluch" |
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| Title: Re: AA: EAP - Argument against God's existence developed! |
01 Aug 2003 01:38:07 AM |
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In a message sent 'round the world, M.H. Torringjan poured fuel on the
fire with the following:
EAP – Tom Schaffer, a philosophy professor at Harvard has
finally developed an objective, deductive proof of the non-existence
of God.
....
God, meanwhile, could not be reached for comment on the subject.
This is to be expected, since his existence had been dis-proven. Reality
coincides with the deity's will. If he wishes to retain the validity of
logic then he banishes himself into non-existence. If he declares the
proof invalid then he changes the existing rules of logic, causing an
immediate crash of all computers on earth which run according to the old
rules.
Phone calls to any of the deity’s spokespeople were not
returned, ...
They never return calls because the deity's mind is inscrutable, and
besides, all the answers can be found in the book.
... but their answering machines wished is a good day ...
There's nothing like that personal touch.
... and reminded us that god does, in fact, love us.
Prolly cuz we're all so cute and cuddly.
Regards,
Josef
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
-- Benjamin Franklin
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| User: "Barry OGrady" |
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| Title: Re: AA: EAP - Argument against God's existence developed! |
01 Aug 2003 01:56:08 PM |
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On 31 Jul 2003 18:44:46 -0700, (M.H. Torringjan) wrote:
Naysayers around the world have been saying “nay” since
the initial announcement last week. “Somebody trying to say
that God doesn’t exist is just freaky!” remarked Albert, a
stoner on the corner outside of the EAP building, who insisted that he
had no last name. “I mean, really! Has he even *met*
God?” When informed that the answer was likely,
“no,” he replied, “See, that just proves my
point!”
When you paste from a website fix the bloody numbers.
-Barry
========
Web page: http://members.optusnet.com.au/~barry.og
Atheist, radio scanner, LIPD information.
Voicemail/fax number +14136227640
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| User: "Martin Crisp" |
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| Title: Re: AA: EAP - Argument against God's existence developed! |
01 Aug 2003 07:27:30 PM |
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On Sat, 2 Aug 2003 4:56:08 +1000, Barry OGrady wrote
(in message <qndliv4pcuku5t8jk20f5ieefudh8qik4t@4ax.com>):
[snip a &8216;mangled&8217; bit of post]
When you paste from a website fix the bloody numbers.
I don't think it was a paste, at least not _from_ a website.
'Smart' quotes and posting via google... [i.e. he probably didn't
even see the problem.]
Have Fun
Martin
--
aa #1792
Almost always SMASHed
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