Religions > Atheism > Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!!
| Topic: |
Religions > Atheism |
| User: |
"TRUECRISTIAN" |
| Date: |
28 Sep 2007 05:19:25 AM |
| Object: |
Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team! Don't risk ending up in Hell
and spending a lifetime doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava
while that bloated ignoramus Michael Moore bobs like a pork crackling
buoy of singed, bubbling blubber beside you, spitting out his
blasphemous research for all of eternity! It's a horrifying thought,
but it just a preview of the frightening, sadistic horrors the Lord
Jesus has in mind for you if you don't start showering Him with
fawning, effusive flattery before He gets around to smiting you and
flinging you into Hell.
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| User: "Hatter" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 09:26:01 AM |
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On Sep 28, 9:52 am, "Mark K. Bilbo" <gm...@com.mkbilbo> wrote:
On Fri, 28 Sep 2007 03:19:25 -0700, TRUECRISTIAN wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team!
You think you're funny don't you?
--
Mark K. Bilbo a.a. #1423
EAC Department of Linguistic Subversion
------------------------------------------------------------
"You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards,
witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, food falling
from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical,
absurd and primitive stories, and you say that *we* are the
ones that need help?" - Jon Stoll
What's a quasi-American? Are you a citizen of North America, South
America, or Central America? Perhaps Puerto Rico residents are quasi-
Americans. You know, Since Puerto Rico is not Part of the US, but is a
protectorate of the US.
Hatter
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| User: "Mark K. Bilbo" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME AREAL AMERICAN!! |
29 Sep 2007 10:04:16 AM |
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On Fri, 28 Sep 2007 07:26:01 -0700, Hatter wrote:
On Sep 28, 9:52 am, "Mark K. Bilbo" <gm...@com.mkbilbo> wrote:
On Fri, 28 Sep 2007 03:19:25 -0700, TRUECRISTIAN wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team!
You think you're funny don't you?
--
Mark K. Bilbo a.a. #1423 EAC Department of Linguistic
Subversion ------------------------------------------------------------
"You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches,
demons, sticks turning into snakes, food falling from the sky, people
walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive
stories, and you say that *we* are the ones that need help?" - Jon
Stoll
What's a quasi-American? Are you a citizen of North America, South
America, or Central America? Perhaps Puerto Rico residents are quasi-
Americans. You know, Since Puerto Rico is not Part of the US, but is a
protectorate of the US.
Well, "American" is anybody born in the Americas (not just the US which
is only *part* of the Americas) so I guess you have to be... quasi-born?
--
Mark K. Bilbo a.a. #1423
EAC Department of Linguistic Subversion
------------------------------------------------------------
"You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards,
witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, food falling
from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical,
absurd and primitive stories, and you say that *we* are the
ones that need help?" - Jon Stoll
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| User: "Al Klein" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
29 Sep 2007 05:22:41 PM |
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On Sat, 29 Sep 2007 10:04:16 -0500, "Mark K. Bilbo"
<gmail@com.mkbilbo> wrote:
On Fri, 28 Sep 2007 07:26:01 -0700, Hatter wrote:
On Sep 28, 9:52 am, "Mark K. Bilbo" <gm...@com.mkbilbo> wrote:
On Fri, 28 Sep 2007 03:19:25 -0700, TRUECRISTIAN wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team!
You think you're funny don't you?
--
Mark K. Bilbo a.a. #1423 EAC Department of Linguistic
Subversion ------------------------------------------------------------
"You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches,
demons, sticks turning into snakes, food falling from the sky, people
walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive
stories, and you say that *we* are the ones that need help?" - Jon
Stoll
What's a quasi-American? Are you a citizen of North America, South
America, or Central America? Perhaps Puerto Rico residents are quasi-
Americans. You know, Since Puerto Rico is not Part of the US, but is a
protectorate of the US.
Well, "American" is anybody born in the Americas (not just the US which
is only *part* of the Americas) so I guess you have to be... quasi-born?
He's not even unborn. There are embryos smarter - and better-educated
- than he is.
--
Al at Webdingers dot com
"They laughed at Newton, they laughed at Einstein, but they also laughed at
Bozo the Clown."
- Carl Sagan
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| User: "Matt Silberstein" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 09:50:17 AM |
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On Fri, 28 Sep 2007 03:19:25 -0700, in alt.atheism , TRUECRISTIAN
<XL5@OPERAMAIL.COM> in
<1190974765.664031.88400@r29g2000hsg.googlegroups.com> wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team! Don't risk ending up in Hell
and spending a lifetime doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava
while that bloated ignoramus Michael Moore bobs like a pork crackling
buoy of singed, bubbling blubber beside you, spitting out his
blasphemous research for all of eternity! It's a horrifying thought,
but it just a preview of the frightening, sadistic horrors the Lord
Jesus has in mind for you if you don't start showering Him with
fawning, effusive flattery before He gets around to smiting you and
flinging you into Hell.
I love the "doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava", but
"ignoramus" just ruins the flow. Why people respond to this as though
you were serious I simply don't understand. BTW, interesting choice to
save all of the inappropriate capitals for your name and where are the
extra !?
--
Matt Silberstein
Do something today about the Darfur Genocide
http://www.beawitness.org
http://www.darfurgenocide.org
http://www.savedarfur.org
"Darfur: A Genocide We can Stop"
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| User: "Nosterill" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 06:14:26 AM |
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On Sep 28, 11:19 am, TRUECRISTIAN <X...@OPERAMAIL.COM> wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team! Don't risk ending up in Hell
and spending a lifetime doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava
while that bloated ignoramus Michael Moore bobs like a pork crackling
buoy of singed, bubbling blubber beside you, spitting out his
blasphemous research for all of eternity! It's a horrifying thought,
but it just a preview of the frightening, sadistic horrors the Lord
Jesus has in mind for you if you don't start showering Him with
fawning, effusive flattery before He gets around to smiting you and
flinging you into Hell.
You seem to have just called your Lord Jesus a sadist! He'll be really
cross with you now. I'm so glad that I live in Europe where we don't
have to worry like that.
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| User: "skyeyes" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 01:26:43 PM |
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On Sep 28, 3:19 am, TRUECRISTIAN <X...@OPERAMAIL.COM> wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team! Don't risk ending up in Hell
and spending a lifetime doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava
while that bloated ignoramus Michael Moore bobs like a pork crackling
buoy of singed, bubbling blubber beside you, spitting out his
blasphemous research for all of eternity! It's a horrifying thought,
but it just a preview of the frightening, sadistic horrors the Lord
Jesus has in mind for you if you don't start showering Him with
fawning, effusive flattery before He gets around to smiting you and
flinging you into Hell.
This post is one of the best arguments for atheism that anyone could
possibly make. Thank you.
Brenda Nelson, A.A.#34
EAC Professor of Feline Thermometrics and Cat-Herding
skyeyes at dakotacom dot net
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| User: "Conspiracy of Doves" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 09:58:58 AM |
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On Sep 28, 6:19 am, TRUECRISTIAN <X...@OPERAMAIL.COM> wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team! Don't risk ending up in Hell
and spending a lifetime doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava
while that bloated ignoramus Michael Moore bobs like a pork crackling
buoy of singed, bubbling blubber beside you, spitting out his
blasphemous research for all of eternity! It's a horrifying thought,
but it just a preview of the frightening, sadistic horrors the Lord
Jesus has in mind for you if you don't start showering Him with
fawning, effusive flattery before He gets around to smiting you and
flinging you into Hell.
This guy's head would probably implode if you informed him that Jesus
was not, in fact, an American.
/Even if he had existed
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| User: "Rev. Karl E. Taylor" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 09:34:18 AM |
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TRUECRISTIAN <XL5@operamail.com> wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team! Don't risk ending up in Hell
and spending a lifetime doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava
while that bloated ignoramus Michael Moore bobs like a pork crackling
buoy of singed, bubbling blubber beside you, spitting out his
blasphemous research for all of eternity! It's a horrifying thought,
but it just a preview of the frightening, sadistic horrors the Lord
Jesus has in mind for you if you don't start showering Him with
fawning, effusive flattery before He gets around to smiting you and
flinging you into Hell.
Hummm, Landover Baptist is a parody site, moron.
--
There are none more ignorant and useless,
than they that seek answers on their knees,
with their eyes closed.
____________________________________________________________________
Rev. Karl E. Taylor
A.A #1143 PLONKED by Bob
Apostle of Dr. Lao EAC: Virgin Conversion Unit Director
____________________________________________________________________
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| User: "Al Klein" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 11:31:37 AM |
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On Fri, 28 Sep 2007 07:34:18 -0700, "Rev. Karl E. Taylor"
<ktaylor@dhcpdns2.ddsoho.com> wrote:
TRUECRISTIAN <XL5@operamail.com> wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team! Don't risk ending up in Hell
and spending a lifetime doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava
while that bloated ignoramus Michael Moore bobs like a pork crackling
buoy of singed, bubbling blubber beside you, spitting out his
blasphemous research for all of eternity! It's a horrifying thought,
but it just a preview of the frightening, sadistic horrors the Lord
Jesus has in mind for you if you don't start showering Him with
fawning, effusive flattery before He gets around to smiting you and
flinging you into Hell.
Hummm, Landover Baptist is a parody site, moron.
Is Whitehouse.org part of Landover Baptist? I wouldn't be surprised,
but I thought they were separate.
--
Al at Webdingers dot com
"They laughed at Newton, they laughed at Einstein, but they also laughed at
Bozo the Clown."
- Carl Sagan
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| User: "Free Lunch" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 09:47:10 AM |
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On Fri, 28 Sep 2007 07:34:18 -0700, in alt.atheism
"Rev. Karl E. Taylor" <ktaylor@dhcpdns2.ddsoho.com> wrote in
<a0gvs4-1s03.ln1@dhcpdns2.ddsoho.com>:
TRUECRISTIAN <XL5@operamail.com> wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team! Don't risk ending up in Hell
and spending a lifetime doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava
while that bloated ignoramus Michael Moore bobs like a pork crackling
buoy of singed, bubbling blubber beside you, spitting out his
blasphemous research for all of eternity! It's a horrifying thought,
but it just a preview of the frightening, sadistic horrors the Lord
Jesus has in mind for you if you don't start showering Him with
fawning, effusive flattery before He gets around to smiting you and
flinging you into Hell.
Hummm, Landover Baptist is a parody site, moron.
Yet, no matter how outrageous their parody, someone comes along in
reality and tries to top them.
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| User: "Matt Silberstein" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 10:46:34 AM |
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On Fri, 28 Sep 2007 07:34:18 -0700, in alt.atheism , "Rev. Karl E.
Taylor" <ktaylor@dhcpdns2.ddsoho.com> in
<a0gvs4-1s03.ln1@dhcpdns2.ddsoho.com> wrote:
TRUECRISTIAN <XL5@operamail.com> wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team! Don't risk ending up in Hell
and spending a lifetime doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava
while that bloated ignoramus Michael Moore bobs like a pork crackling
buoy of singed, bubbling blubber beside you, spitting out his
blasphemous research for all of eternity! It's a horrifying thought,
but it just a preview of the frightening, sadistic horrors the Lord
Jesus has in mind for you if you don't start showering Him with
fawning, effusive flattery before He gets around to smiting you and
flinging you into Hell.
Hummm, Landover Baptist is a parody site, moron.
Yes, so perhaps the "moron" is misplaced. That passage *screams* I AM
A TROLL.
--
Matt Silberstein
Do something today about the Darfur Genocide
http://www.beawitness.org
http://www.darfurgenocide.org
http://www.savedarfur.org
"Darfur: A Genocide We can Stop"
.
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| User: "Rev. Karl E. Taylor" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOMEA REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 06:53:18 PM |
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Matt Silberstein wrote:
On Fri, 28 Sep 2007 07:34:18 -0700, in alt.atheism , "Rev. Karl E.
Taylor" <ktaylor@dhcpdns2.ddsoho.com> in
<a0gvs4-1s03.ln1@dhcpdns2.ddsoho.com> wrote:
TRUECRISTIAN <XL5@operamail.com> wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team! Don't risk ending up in Hell
and spending a lifetime doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava
while that bloated ignoramus Michael Moore bobs like a pork crackling
buoy of singed, bubbling blubber beside you, spitting out his
blasphemous research for all of eternity! It's a horrifying thought,
but it just a preview of the frightening, sadistic horrors the Lord
Jesus has in mind for you if you don't start showering Him with
fawning, effusive flattery before He gets around to smiting you and
flinging you into Hell.
Hummm, Landover Baptist is a parody site, moron.
Yes, so perhaps the "moron" is misplaced. That passage *screams* I AM
A TROLL.
Yes, Matt, I got that part. Thanks.
--
There are none more ignorant and useless,
than they that seek answers on their knees,
with their eyes closed.
____________________________________________________________________
Rev. Karl E. Taylor http://www.secularity.com/ktayloraz
A.A #1143 http://azhotops.blogspot.com/
Apostle of Dr. Lao EAC: Virgin Conversion Unit Director
____________________________________________________________________
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| User: "Wayne Delia" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOMEA REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 11:14:05 AM |
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TRUECRISTIAN wrote:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team! Don't risk ending up in Hell
and spending a lifetime doggy paddling in the lake of boiling lava
while that bloated ignoramus Michael Moore bobs like a pork crackling
buoy of singed, bubbling blubber beside you, <braaaap>
"Mmmmm.... pork crackling blubber...." (Homer Simpson)
WMD
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| User: "Thurisaz, Germanic barbarian" |
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| Title: Re: Accept the Lord Jesus Christ as Your Personal Savior TO BECOME A REAL AMERICAN!! |
28 Sep 2007 08:34:17 AM |
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TRUEMORON:
That's why today, non-Christian quasi-American friend, it's time to
get on board 100% with the winning team!
Non-morontheists already are.
--
"To his friend a man a friend shall prove, and gifts with gifts requite;
But men shall mocking with mockery answer, and fraud with falsehood meet."
(The Poetic Edda)
Must have been written with fundies in mind...
My personal judgment of monotheism:
http://www.carcosa.de/nojebus
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