Religions > Atheism > Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills'
| Topic: |
Religions > Atheism |
| User: |
"Pumba" |
| Date: |
06 Jun 2006 08:21:36 AM |
| Object: |
Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of the
USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Obviously, the lioness hadn't got the memo.
Of course, purists would be inclined to point out that he made a rather
crucial error (not in climbing into the enclosure in the first place, mind
you) but that he proclaimed his lack of faith in God when he used the word "if".
Nothing is surer to turn God off helping you if you doubt He can.
The next person to try this experiment should bear this in mind. Leave off
the "if". It is crucial that you "psyche" God out and at least pretend that
you believe in Him with all your heart.
Oh, and do carry a backup handgun, if God proves elusive on the occasion.
:-D
~ ~ ~
http://today.reuters.com/news/newsarticle.aspx?storyid=2006-06-05T133715Z_01_L05642927_RTRUKOC_0_US-UKRAINE-LION.xml
Lioness in zoo kills man who invoked God
KIEV (Reuters) - A man shouting that God would keep him safe was mauled to
death by a lioness in Kiev zoo after he crept into the animal's enclosure, a
zoo official said on Monday.
"The man shouted 'God will save me, if he exists', lowered himself by a rope
into the enclosure, took his shoes off and went up to the lions," the
official said.
"A lioness went straight for him, knocked him down and severed his carotid
artery."
The incident, Sunday evening when the zoo was packed with visitors, was the
first of its kind at the attraction. Lions and tigers are kept in an "animal
island" protected by thick concrete blocks.
--
Pumba, the warthog, from the Lion King
Yeah, I gotta cool blog too. Hey, Pumba has stuff to say!
http://www.capetownnews.co.za
Have a happy Pumbahed day!
.
|
|
| User: "Bill M" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
06 Jun 2006 10:33:37 AM |
|
|
"Pumba" <pumba@muizenberg.org.za> wrote in message
news:44858160.20200@muizenberg.org.za...
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of
the USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Obviously, the lioness hadn't got the memo.
Just another drop of water in the ocean of evidence that NO gods exist and
are purely the creation of man's imagination.
.
|
|
|
| User: "Pumba" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
06 Jun 2006 11:07:22 AM |
|
|
Bill M wrote:
"Pumba" <pumba@muizenberg.org.za> wrote in message
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of
the USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Obviously, the lioness hadn't got the memo.
Just another drop of water in the ocean of evidence that NO gods exist and
are purely the creation of man's imagination.
Bibles should come with a thick red band around them carrying The
Surgeon General's message:
"WARNING: Believing the contents of this book to be the literal truth
can be hazardous to your health. Do not operate heavy machinery whilst
under the influence of Biblical teachings. Bear in mind that it is
illegal to have sex with your daughters (even if your wife has just
died, and they want it). Discriminating against homosexuals and people
of other religious persuasions is a BAD thing. Check with your county
first to see if you are allowed to sacrifice animals within the city
limits. You are required to obey first the laws of countries, no matter
what this book says. Finally, even though this book predicts the end of
the world with a devastating war centred around events in the Middle
East, normal people don't actually want that to happen and neither
should you. Should you become president of the United States, please
bear this uppermost in your mind before you embark on a course of
action to further destabilise the region."
.
|
|
|
|
|
| User: "Melchizedek" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
06 Jun 2006 05:47:45 PM |
|
|
"Pumba" <pumba@muizenberg.org.za> wrote in message news:44858160.20200@muizenberg.org.za...
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of the
USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
Understanding the Times
http://207.234.208.119/bibleweb-dvd-01.info/dvd-01/index.html
Understanding The Times (Online MediaPlayer Videos)
----------------------------------------------------------------
--
Pumba, the warthog, from the Lion King
Yeah, I gotta cool blog too. Hey, Pumba has stuff to say!
http://207.234.208.119/bibleweb-archive.info/dont-click-this.html
Have a happy Pumbahed day!
.
|
|
|
| User: "Mark K. Bilbo" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
06 Jun 2006 06:45:10 PM |
|
|
Previously, on alt.atheism, Melchizedek in episode
<jCnhg.49637$qd2.36108@bignews6.bellsouth.net>...
"Pumba" <pumba@muizenberg.org.za> wrote in message
news:44858160.20200@muizenberg.org.za... A man in Kiev, which is the
capital of the Ukraine (a former province of the USSR), made a meal out of
himself this past Sunday when he decided to conduct a personal test for
the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
And he's dead now.
--
Mark K. Bilbo
--------------------------------------------------
"As hip as it is for outsiders to blame New Orleans
for everything bad that happened during and after
Hurricane Katrina, the truth is that the people
who lived here were much more prepared for a big
storm than the federal government that promised
us flood protection." [Jarvis DeBerry]
http://makeashorterlink.com/?V180525DC
"Everything New Orleans"
http://www.nola.com
.
|
|
|
|
|
| User: "Jim07D6" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
06 Jun 2006 09:30:32 AM |
|
|
Pumba <pumba@muizenberg.org.za> said:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of the
USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Obviously, the lioness hadn't got the memo.
Of course, purists would be inclined to point out that he made a rather
crucial error (not in climbing into the enclosure in the first place, mind
you) but that he proclaimed his lack of faith in God when he used the word "if".
Nothing is surer to turn God off helping you if you doubt He can.
The next person to try this experiment should bear this in mind. Leave off
the "if". It is crucial that you "psyche" God out and at least pretend that
you believe in Him with all your heart.
Oh, and do carry a backup handgun, if God proves elusive on the occasion.
:-D
What he failed to consider is whether the God that exists made *lions*
in His own image.
--- Jim07D6
.
|
|
|
|
| User: "Father Haskell" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
07 Jun 2006 12:37:15 AM |
|
|
Pumba wrote:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of the
USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Natural selection in action. It's a miracle that occasionally
one of them survives their own stupidity long enough to pass
on their genetic complement.
.
|
|
|
| User: "Douglas D. Anderson" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
07 Jun 2006 04:46:14 AM |
|
|
Father Haskell wrote:
Pumba wrote:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of the
USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Natural selection in action. It's a miracle that occasionally
one of them survives their own stupidity long enough to pass
on their genetic complement.
Who's more likely to survive, the dumb Ukrainians who tried to
put out the Chernobyl reactor core with fire hoses or the lazy
nuclear scientists who built unsafe reactors and got careless
in playing with one? It's a toss-up, smart and stupid are both
running neck and neck in the race to survival.
.
|
|
|
| User: "Dennis Peters" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
13 Jun 2006 03:35:42 PM |
|
|
"Douglas D. Anderson" <dda@rr.rochester.com> wrote in message
news:Gfxhg.13945$W97.12293@twister.nyroc.rr.com...
Father Haskell wrote:
Pumba wrote:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of
the
USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying
loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Natural selection in action. It's a miracle that occasionally
one of them survives their own stupidity long enough to pass
on their genetic complement.
Who's more likely to survive, the dumb Ukrainians who tried to
put out the Chernobyl reactor core with fire hoses or the lazy
nuclear scientists who built unsafe reactors and got careless
in playing with one? It's a toss-up, smart and stupid are both
running neck and neck in the race to survival.
Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God. He did not know this.
Further; If you will read of the miracles; only those things that were
beyond the power of man were done. Whether the man was foolish? He was. It
proves only that he was a fool.
.
|
|
|
| User: "Richard Catto" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
16 Jun 2006 11:49:26 AM |
|
|
Dennis Peters wrote:
"Douglas D. Anderson" <dda@rr.rochester.com> wrote in message
Father Haskell wrote:
Pumba wrote:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of
the USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying
loudly that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Natural selection in action. It's a miracle that occasionally
one of them survives their own stupidity long enough to pass
on their genetic complement.
Who's more likely to survive, the dumb Ukrainians who tried to
put out the Chernobyl reactor core with fire hoses or the lazy
nuclear scientists who built unsafe reactors and got careless
in playing with one? It's a toss-up, smart and stupid are both
running neck and neck in the race to survival.
Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God.
tempt?
how was tossing himself to the lions, tempting God?
tempting God to do what? nothing?
i guess God fell for the temptation then.
i believe the verse you misquoted reads like this actually:
thou shalt not TEST the Lord thy God.
whatever.
if anything cannot be TESTED, then it cannot be proven.
i guess God doesn't want to be TESTED, because the people who wrote
that bunch of garbage we know as the Bible, knew full well he would
FAIL everytime.
except of course in their stories that they wrote about.
Harry Potter can fly, ya know. Rowlings tells me so.
I haven't actually seen Harry Potter fly, but I believe it, therefore I
am blessed.
yup. me be blessed.
He did not know this.
ok, he did. that is my opinion. somewhere in that man's brain, he knew
there was no god. he knew he was gonna get eaten. he was suicidally
depressed, and that's the real reason he jumped into the lion's den.
*****, if i was gonna offer myself up as a human meal to a wild animal,
i'd first smear my body full of my own excrement. make it eat my *****.
i wonder if any tribe has had a tradition of its warriors smearing
themselves full of their own ***** prior to battle?
pretty off putting to engage in hand to hand combat with an enemy
covered in its own foul smelling greasy excrement.
and if you ran a bit low on your own excrement, would your friends
supply you with some of theirs to rub all over your body and face?
one lump or two, dear?
btw, i'm eating yoghurt here. mmmm mmm mmm. chunky fruit pieces.
Further; If you will read of the miracles; only those things that were
beyond the power of man were done.
uh huh.
what miracles?
you mean the ones you READ about in the Bible?
did you know that i parted my bath water this morning?
sure. i tapped it with my sponge and told it to divide, and it did,
because i'm a miracle working man. all i gotta do to be believed is
write it down.
it happened exactly the way i wrote it, because i am incapable of
lying.
Whether the man was foolish? He was. It proves only that he was a fool.
do you believe that God kept the lions from eating Daniel?
do you believe that God kept the furnace from consuming Daniel and his
friends?
it never happened.
it is all lies. a big fat con.
.
|
|
|
| User: "Father Haskell" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
16 Jun 2006 07:49:08 PM |
|
|
Richard Catto wrote:
Dennis Peters wrote:
"Douglas D. Anderson" <dda@rr.rochester.com> wrote in message
Father Haskell wrote:
Pumba wrote:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of
the USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying
loudly that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Natural selection in action. It's a miracle that occasionally
one of them survives their own stupidity long enough to pass
on their genetic complement.
Who's more likely to survive, the dumb Ukrainians who tried to
put out the Chernobyl reactor core with fire hoses or the lazy
nuclear scientists who built unsafe reactors and got careless
in playing with one? It's a toss-up, smart and stupid are both
running neck and neck in the race to survival.
Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God.
tempt?
how was tossing himself to the lions, tempting God?
Tempted to do what? Save him? Or sit back with a
freshly packed bowl, do zipshit and watch him get
eaten?
tempting God to do what? nothing?
i guess God fell for the temptation then.
i believe the verse you misquoted reads like this actually:
thou shalt not TEST the Lord thy God.
whatever.
if anything cannot be TESTED, then it cannot be proven.
Bingo, triple-20, home run, touchdown...
i guess God doesn't want to be TESTED, because the people who wrote
that bunch of garbage we know as the Bible, knew full well he would
FAIL everytime.
except of course in their stories that they wrote about.
Harry Potter can fly, ya know. Rowlings tells me so.
I haven't actually seen Harry Potter fly, but I believe it, therefore I
am blessed.
yup. me be blessed.
He did not know this.
ok, he did. that is my opinion. somewhere in that man's brain, he knew
there was no god. he knew he was gonna get eaten. he was suicidally
depressed, and that's the real reason he jumped into the lion's den.
Probably he was on PCP. Probably, the poor lion absorbed
the phencyclidine stored in the idiot's body fat. The zoo should
sue his family for poisoning their favorite lion.
Is no one else here thinking of the lion?
*****, if i was gonna offer myself up as a human meal to a wild animal,
i'd first smear my body full of my own excrement. make it eat my *****.
i wonder if any tribe has had a tradition of its warriors smearing
themselves full of their own ***** prior to battle?
Napoleon Chagnon said his first impression of the Yanomamo
was their incredible stench from never bathing. Smearing themselves
with excrement would have been an unnecessary waste of good *****.
pretty off putting to engage in hand to hand combat with an enemy
covered in its own foul smelling greasy excrement.
and if you ran a bit low on your own excrement, would your friends
supply you with some of theirs to rub all over your body and face?
one lump or two, dear?
btw, i'm eating yoghurt here. mmmm mmm mmm. chunky fruit pieces.
Further; If you will read of the miracles; only those things that were
beyond the power of man were done.
uh huh.
what miracles?
you mean the ones you READ about in the Bible?
did you know that i parted my bath water this morning?
sure. i tapped it with my sponge and told it to divide, and it did,
because i'm a miracle working man. all i gotta do to be believed is
write it down.
it happened exactly the way i wrote it, because i am incapable of
lying.
Whether the man was foolish? He was. It proves only that he was a fool.
do you believe that God kept the lions from eating Daniel?
do you believe that God kept the furnace from consuming Daniel and his
friends?
it never happened.
it is all lies. a big fat con.
The rest of the book is lies, too.
.
|
|
|
| User: "St. Jackanapes" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
21 Jun 2006 02:39:30 PM |
|
|
In alt.flame.jesus.christ, Father Haskell added to the
insanity...
Richard Catto wrote:
Dennis Peters wrote:
"Douglas D. Anderson" <dda@rr.rochester.com> wrote in message
Father Haskell wrote:
Pumba wrote:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of
the USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying
loudly that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Natural selection in action. It's a miracle that occasionally
one of them survives their own stupidity long enough to pass
on their genetic complement.
Who's more likely to survive, the dumb Ukrainians who tried to
put out the Chernobyl reactor core with fire hoses or the lazy
nuclear scientists who built unsafe reactors and got careless
in playing with one? It's a toss-up, smart and stupid are both
running neck and neck in the race to survival.
Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God.
tempt?
how was tossing himself to the lions, tempting God?
Tempted to do what? Save him? Or sit back with a
freshly packed bowl, do zipshit and watch him get
eaten?
tempting God to do what? nothing?
i guess God fell for the temptation then.
i believe the verse you misquoted reads like this actually:
thou shalt not TEST the Lord thy God.
whatever.
if anything cannot be TESTED, then it cannot be proven.
Bingo, triple-20, home run, touchdown...
i guess God doesn't want to be TESTED, because the people who wrote
that bunch of garbage we know as the Bible, knew full well he would
FAIL everytime.
except of course in their stories that they wrote about.
Harry Potter can fly, ya know. Rowlings tells me so.
I haven't actually seen Harry Potter fly, but I believe it, therefore I
am blessed.
yup. me be blessed.
He did not know this.
ok, he did. that is my opinion. somewhere in that man's brain, he knew
there was no god. he knew he was gonna get eaten. he was suicidally
depressed, and that's the real reason he jumped into the lion's den.
Probably he was on PCP. Probably, the poor lion absorbed
the phencyclidine stored in the idiot's body fat. The zoo should
sue his family for poisoning their favorite lion.
Is no one else here thinking of the lion?
*****, if i was gonna offer myself up as a human meal to a wild animal,
i'd first smear my body full of my own excrement. make it eat my *****.
i wonder if any tribe has had a tradition of its warriors smearing
themselves full of their own ***** prior to battle?
Napoleon Chagnon said his first impression of the Yanomamo
was their incredible stench from never bathing. Smearing themselves
with excrement would have been an unnecessary waste of good *****.
Don't be too hard on the poor Yanomamo. I'm sure their lack of
bathing has something to do with the large amount of
hallucinogens they take.
--
St. Jackanapes ~
Cogito sumere potum alterum!
ULC Ordained Saint since 1999
http://www.jackanapes.ws
St. Jack's Flame Forum: http://www.voy.com/20630/
.
|
|
|
| User: "Father Haskell" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
21 Jun 2006 03:20:50 PM |
|
|
St. Jackanapes wrote:
Don't be too hard on the poor Yanomamo. I'm sure their lack of
bathing has something to do with the large amount of
hallucinogens they take.
Which takes up their entire day after eating, scavenging, and fighting.
They can snort entire nickel bags of virola snuff in one shotgun blast.
Makes them so out in the land that they don't care about the
thick, green layer of dried, DMT-laced snot encrusting their torsos.
Maybe they scrape it up and reuse it.
.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| User: "Father Haskell" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
07 Jun 2006 07:29:48 PM |
|
|
Douglas D. Anderson wrote:
Father Haskell wrote:
Pumba wrote:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of the
USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Natural selection in action. It's a miracle that occasionally
one of them survives their own stupidity long enough to pass
on their genetic complement.
Who's more likely to survive, the dumb Ukrainians who tried to
put out the Chernobyl reactor core with fire hoses or the lazy
nuclear scientists who built unsafe reactors and got careless
in playing with one? It's a toss-up, smart and stupid are both
running neck and neck in the race to survival.
Were the techs running about, screaming in Russian,
"Bog will protect us! Bog will protect us!"?
Was there even 1/10 of the comedy potential?
.
|
|
|
|
|
|
| User: "Keith E." |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
06 Jun 2006 06:01:25 PM |
|
|
Tue, 06 Jun 2006 15:21:36 +0200 was a day just like any other,
until Pumba <pumba@muizenberg.org.za> wrote:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of the
USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Obviously, the lioness hadn't got the memo.
On the other hand, maybe the lioness _did_ get the memo.
--
Keith E.
Excrementum casus
.
|
|
|
| User: "Pumba" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
07 Jun 2006 09:14:52 AM |
|
|
Keith E. wrote:
Tue, 06 Jun 2006 15:21:36 +0200 was a day just like any other,
until Pumba <pumba@muizenberg.org.za> wrote:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of the
USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Obviously, the lioness hadn't got the memo.
On the other hand, maybe the lioness _did_ get the memo.
mebbe so, but she did not have her bifocals to hand.
anyway, what interests me is this close symbiont relationship that
Christians appear to enjoy with lions.
it is rumoured that an archetypal Christian, name of Daniel, enjoyed a
more peaceful and loving relationship with them.
Christians' own literature purports to say that God causes lambs to lie
down with lions (without being eaten).
In reality, however, Christians thrown to the lions during Roman times
did not enjoy any of the benefits that Daniel (and his companions)
apparently enjoyed. They were munched en masse.
So on the one hand there is the wishful thinking of the Christians (as
stated in their literature) and then there is the reality of the
situation, and the never the twain shall meet.
I have to sorrowfully conclude that Christianity butt fucks the world.
and then discriminates against butt fuckers, to boot.
What can be done to rectify this situation?
.
|
|
|
| User: "Keith E." |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
07 Jun 2006 06:39:33 PM |
|
|
7 Jun 2006 07:14:52 -0700 was a day just like any other, until
"Pumba" <pumba@muizenberg.org.za> wrote:
Keith E. wrote:
Tue, 06 Jun 2006 15:21:36 +0200 was a day just like any other,
until Pumba <pumba@muizenberg.org.za> wrote:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of the
USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Obviously, the lioness hadn't got the memo.
On the other hand, maybe the lioness _did_ get the memo.
mebbe so, but she did not have her bifocals to hand.
anyway, what interests me is this close symbiont relationship that
Christians appear to enjoy with lions.
it is rumoured that an archetypal Christian, name of Daniel, enjoyed a
more peaceful and loving relationship with them.
Christians' own literature purports to say that God causes lambs to lie
down with lions (without being eaten).
In reality, however, Christians thrown to the lions during Roman times
did not enjoy any of the benefits that Daniel (and his companions)
apparently enjoyed. They were munched en masse.
So on the one hand there is the wishful thinking of the Christians (as
stated in their literature) and then there is the reality of the
situation, and the never the twain shall meet.
I have to sorrowfully conclude that Christianity butt fucks the world.
and then discriminates against butt fuckers, to boot.
That must be the Biblical explanation for Sigfried and Roy. (1)
What can be done to rectify this situation?
Breed more lions!
(1) I _know_ it was tigers, so effin' what!
--
Keith E.
Excrementum casus
.
|
|
|
|
| User: "Ærchie" |
|
| Title: Re: Another in our series of articles, entitled 'Religion kills' |
07 Jun 2006 09:58:46 AM |
|
|
The curfew had been lifted and the gamblin' wheel shut down, Anyone with
any sense had already left town. Yet Pumba was standin' in the doorway
saying:
Keith E. wrote:
Tue, 06 Jun 2006 15:21:36 +0200 was a day just like any other,
until Pumba <pumba@muizenberg.org.za> wrote:
A man in Kiev, which is the capital of the Ukraine (a former province of the
USSR), made a meal out of himself this past Sunday when he decided to
conduct a personal test for the existence of God.
He climbed into the lions' enclosure at the Kiev zoo, whilst saying loudly
that God would protect him IF He exists.
He was promptly set upon and killed by a lioness.
Obviously, the lioness hadn't got the memo.
On the other hand, maybe the lioness _did_ get the memo.
mebbe so, but she did not have her bifocals to hand.
anyway, what interests me is this close symbiont relationship that
Christians appear to enjoy with lions.
it is rumoured that an archetypal Christian, name of Daniel, enjoyed a
more peaceful and loving relationship with them.
Christians' own literature purports to say that God causes lambs to lie
down with lions (without being eaten).
In reality, however, Christians thrown to the lions during Roman times
did not enjoy any of the benefits that Daniel (and his companions)
apparently enjoyed. They were munched en masse.
So on the one hand there is the wishful thinking of the Christians (as
stated in their literature) and then there is the reality of the
situation, and the never the twain shall meet.
I have to sorrowfully conclude that Christianity butt fucks the world.
and then discriminates against butt fuckers, to boot.
What can be done to rectify this situation?
You mis-spelled "Rectumfy"
Ærchie
.
|
|
|
|
|
|

|
Related Articles |
|
|