Cleaning up the gene pool.


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Darwin list celebrates removal of the daftest

Blown up, electrocuted and horribly emasculated in 2005
Robin McKie, science editor
Sunday January 1, 2006

Observer
In retrospect, it was an obvious error to make. Last January, Marko, a
55-year-old Croatian, thought up an 'ingenious' solution to the problem
of cleaning his chimney. It was too high to push a broom up from the
ground, he realised, so he decided to climb on to his roof and drop a
brush down. All he needed was a nice heavy weight to make sure it did
not get stuck and was pulled straight through to the grate below.

So Marko selected a nice convenient heavy lump of metal - which turned
out to be a hand grenade. Not a great choice, though even then Marko
might have survived the encounter had he not decided to connect the
grenade to the brush by the use of welding equipment. The metal heated
up, the grenade exploded and Marko was killed instantly. His chimney was
untouched.

Marko will not be forgotten, however. He is honoured today in this
year's Darwin Awards. These are given every year, in the name of the
father of evolution, to commemorate those who have best improved the
gene pool of the human species by removing themselves from it.

Darwin awards have been given out for more than a decade and record all
the sublimely idiotic deaths that men and women have inflicted on
themselves in their pursuit of a free drink or a daft bet. Previous
winners include the greedy tourist who, attempting to steal crystals
from a cave, impaled himself on a large stalactite as he chopped it
free; the thirsty victim of a Coke dispensing machine which toppled on
top of him as he tried to tip out a free can; and the Californian
Christian sect leader who tried to learn how to walk on water in his
bath but slipped on a bar of soap and killed himself.

To all these individuals, the name of Marko and several other 2005
winners is now added as a tribute to the manner of their deaths. Among
the newcomers is 21-year-old Nguyen, a Vietnamese youth who was drinking
with friends in Hanoi in March last year when he showed his pals an old
detonator he had just found. It was old and rusty, Nguyen announced, and
couldn't possibly explode. His friends disagreed.

An argument ensued. So, to prove his point, Nguyen stuck the detonator
in his mouth and plugged its dangling wires into a 220-volt electrical
socket. The result was predictable - though at least Nyugen had little
time to reflect on his mistake. He died almost instantly.

Others honoured include Christian from Rushinga, Zimbabwe. Elephants had
been trampling his maize field and so he decided to fight back by
raiding an old minefield near the Zimbabwe-Mozambique border. By
purloining a few landmines and planting them round his maize he would
soon deter the elephants that were blighting his life, he reckoned.

Christian carefully dug up five mines that had been exposed by recent
heavy rains, and began carrying them home. Unfortunately, he dropped
one, again with fatal, instant results.

Closer to home there is the story of Geoff, from Wales, who removed
himself from the gene pool in a different way. 'If Wales wins, I'll cut
my balls off,' he told his mates while watching last year's
England-Wales rugby match. Sadly for him, Wales won, but Geoff chose to
keep his word, ending up in hospital in a 'seriously ill condition'.


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http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/story/0,3605,1676190,00.html

and the Californian Christian sect leader who tried to learn how to
walk on water in his bath but slipped on a bar of soap and killed himself.

Cleaning up the gene pool.


Darwin list celebrates removal of the daftest

Blown up, electrocuted and horribly emasculated in 2005
Robin McKie, science editor
Sunday January 1, 2006

Observer
In retrospect, it was an obvious error to make. Last January, Marko, a
55-year-old Croatian, thought up an 'ingenious' solution to the problem
of cleaning his chimney. It was too high to push a broom up from the
ground, he realised, so he decided to climb on to his roof and drop a
brush down. All he needed was a nice heavy weight to make sure it did
not get stuck and was pulled straight through to the grate below.

So Marko selected a nice convenient heavy lump of metal - which turned
out to be a hand grenade. Not a great choice, though even then Marko
might have survived the encounter had he not decided to connect the
grenade to the brush by the use of welding equipment. The metal heated
up, the grenade exploded and Marko was killed instantly. His chimney was
untouched.

Marko will not be forgotten, however. He is honoured today in this
year's Darwin Awards. These are given every year, in the name of the
father of evolution, to commemorate those who have best improved the
gene pool of the human species by removing themselves from it.

Darwin awards have been given out for more than a decade and record all
the sublimely idiotic deaths that men and women have inflicted on
themselves in their pursuit of a free drink or a daft bet. Previous
winners include the greedy tourist who, attempting to steal crystals
from a cave, impaled himself on a large stalactite as he chopped it
free; the thirsty victim of a Coke dispensing machine which toppled on
top of him as he tried to tip out a free can; and the Californian
Christian sect leader who tried to learn how to walk on water in his
bath but slipped on a bar of soap and killed himself.

To all these individuals, the name of Marko and several other 2005
winners is now added as a tribute to the manner of their deaths. Among
the newcomers is 21-year-old Nguyen, a Vietnamese youth who was drinking
with friends in Hanoi in March last year when he showed his pals an old
detonator he had just found. It was old and rusty, Nguyen announced, and
couldn't possibly explode. His friends disagreed.

An argument ensued. So, to prove his point, Nguyen stuck the detonator
in his mouth and plugged its dangling wires into a 220-volt electrical
socket. The result was predictable - though at least Nyugen had little
time to reflect on his mistake. He died almost instantly.

Others honoured include Christian from Rushinga, Zimbabwe. Elephants had
been trampling his maize field and so he decided to fight back by
raiding an old minefield near the Zimbabwe-Mozambique border. By
purloining a few landmines and planting them round his maize he would
soon deter the elephants that were blighting his life, he reckoned.

Christian carefully dug up five mines that had been exposed by recent
heavy rains, and began carrying them home. Unfortunately, he dropped
one, again with fatal, instant results.

Closer to home there is the story of Geoff, from Wales, who removed
himself from the gene pool in a different way. 'If Wales wins, I'll cut
my balls off,' he told his mates while watching last year's
England-Wales rugby match. Sadly for him, Wales won, but Geoff chose to
keep his word, ending up in hospital in a 'seriously ill condition'.