| Topic: |
Religions > Atheism |
| User: |
"Fred Stone" |
| Date: |
02 Feb 2005 08:32:45 AM |
| Object: |
Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html
(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to
behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was
rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action
figure.
Bush action figure, tired, but uninjured after daring rescue
The nine-inch-tall replica of the president left Andrews Air Force Base
in a scale model of Air Force One within minutes after the Pentagon
learned of the kidnapping from a picture on an Islamic website.
The top-secret flight was reminiscent of the life-size president's
Thanksgiving visit to Baghdad in 2003. During the long trip, the
presidential doll was programmed to say intimidating things in Arabic,
and reportedly spent several hours practicing his kung-fu grip.
Even as the mission was secretly under way, Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, D-
MA, went before the Senate to call for the immediate withdrawal of
12,000 military action figures from Iraq.
Upon hearing of the Bush doll's successful mission, Sen. John Kerry, D-
MA, warned against "overhyping" the significance of the apparently
heroic deed.
--
Fred Stone
aa# 1369
Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far?
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| User: "DianaC" |
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| Title: Re: Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
02 Feb 2005 12:37:38 PM |
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"Fred Stone" <fstone69@earthling.com> wrote in message
news:Xns95F16123C1C8Ffstone69@205.188.138.161...
http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html
(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to
behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was
rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action
figure.
Bush action figure, tired, but uninjured after daring rescue
The nine-inch-tall replica of the president left Andrews Air Force Base
in a scale model of Air Force One within minutes after the Pentagon
learned of the kidnapping from a picture on an Islamic website.
The top-secret flight was reminiscent of the life-size president's
Thanksgiving visit to Baghdad in 2003. During the long trip, the
presidential doll was programmed to say intimidating things in Arabic,
and reportedly spent several hours practicing his kung-fu grip.
Even as the mission was secretly under way, Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, D-
MA, went before the Senate to call for the immediate withdrawal of
12,000 military action figures from Iraq.
Upon hearing of the Bush doll's successful mission, Sen. John Kerry, D-
MA, warned against "overhyping" the significance of the apparently
heroic deed.
Update:
The national threat code has been upgraded to Red on the California coast
line; there is an imminent and credible threat to the Malibu Barbie mansion
and environs.
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| User: "John Hearsey" |
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| Title: Re: Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
02 Feb 2005 02:26:37 PM |
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Fred Stone <fstone69@earthling.com> wrote in message
news:Xns95F16123C1C8Ffstone69@205.188.138.161...
http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html
(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to
behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was
rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action
figure
The loss of their hostage dosn't stop them making more demands, at some
point Danger Mouse will have to be sent.
http://ace.mu.nu/archives/065783.php
Top Ten Other Terrorist Threats
10. "If the UN does not immediately withdraw support for the US occupation
of Iraq, the Jihad Brotherhood will cut off one of Papa Smurf's three
fingers"
9. "We have captured Rainbow Brite, and we will hang her as an infidel at
dawn"
8. "Al-Zarqawi is pleased to announce new reinforcements in his jihad--
COBRA Commander and Megatron of the Decepticons (also, we may get that
completely useless robot who can turn into a fuckin' tape-recorder)"
7. "If the American infidels do not depart Iraq immediately, the streets
will run black with the ink of a thousand Etch-a-Sketches"
6. "I swear to Allah, if you do not release our brave warriors held in
captivity, by next week Garfield the cat will have a whole new reason to
hate Mondays"
5. "You have no chance of defeating us in Iraq, in Afghanistan, or in
high-stakes games of Hungry Hungry Hippos"
4. "We have Jarts and we're not afraid to use them"
3. "If our demands are not met immediately, we will begin pestering your
female soldiers with our great stockpiles of Mr. Microphones; they will not
be able to sleep, for our constant utterances of Hey good-looking, be back
to pick you up later!"
2. "Deliver Donald Rumsfeld to us as a war criminal for trial or we will
take our collection of Muppets and pose them in the most insidiously-sexual
of manners; verily, your children will weep bitter tears when they witness
Elmo being sodomized by the deviant Gonzo and his pansexual chickens"
.... and the Number One Other New Terrorist Announcement...
1. "A thousand explosive Chia Pets will thunder in the streets of Bagh...
oh, ***** it, we're a bunch of buffoonish wankers everybody knows it"
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| User: "Tukla Ratte" |
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| Title: Re: Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
02 Feb 2005 04:55:18 PM |
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Fred Stone wrote:
http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html
(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to
behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was
rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action
figure.
Bush Doll for President!
< snip >
--
Tukla, Eater of Theists, Squeaker of Chew Toys
Official Mascot of Alt.Atheism, aa 1347
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| User: "Clayton Based Life Form" |
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| Title: Re: Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
02 Feb 2005 06:00:53 PM |
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"Tukla Ratte" <tukla_ratte@tukla.net> wrote in message
news:36d42oF4vh7fuU1@individual.net...
Fred Stone wrote:
http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html
(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to
behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was
rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action
figure.
Bush Doll for President!
< snip >
The entire world would certainly be better off!
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| User: "Al Klein" |
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| Title: Re: Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
03 Feb 2005 12:06:21 AM |
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On Wed, 02 Feb 2005 16:55:18 -0600, Tukla Ratte
<tukla_ratte@tukla.net> said in alt.atheism:
Fred Stone wrote:
http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html
(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to
behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was
rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action
figure.
Bush Doll for President!
No thanks - we already have one.
--
"Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious
conviction."
- Blaise Pascal (1623-1662)
(random sig, produced by SigChanger)
rukbat at verizon dot net
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| User: "Tukla Ratte" |
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| Title: Re: Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
03 Feb 2005 10:10:06 AM |
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Al Klein wrote:
On Wed, 02 Feb 2005 16:55:18 -0600, Tukla Ratte
<tukla_ratte@tukla.net> said in alt.atheism:
Fred Stone wrote:
http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html
(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to
behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was
rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action
figure.
Bush Doll for President!
No thanks - we already have one.
I thought an action figure might be an improvement over a puppet.
--
Tukla, Eater of Theists, Squeaker of Chew Toys
Official Mascot of Alt.Atheism, aa 1347
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| User: "Al Klein" |
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| Title: Re: Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
03 Feb 2005 04:36:09 PM |
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On Thu, 03 Feb 2005 10:10:06 -0600, Tukla Ratte
<tukla_ratte@tukla.net> said in alt.atheism:
Al Klein wrote:
On Wed, 02 Feb 2005 16:55:18 -0600, Tukla Ratte
<tukla_ratte@tukla.net> said in alt.atheism:
Bush Doll for President!
No thanks - we already have one.
I thought an action figure might be an improvement over a puppet.
In this case the opposite might be true. A puppet can't screw
anything up.
--
"We should do unto others as we would want them to do unto us. If I were an unborn
fetus I would want others to use force to protect me, therefore using force against
abortionists is *justifiable homocide*."
- "Pro-Life" doctor killer and corpse Paul Hill
(random sig, produced by SigChanger)
rukbat at verizon dot net
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| User: "stoney" |
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| Title: Re: Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
05 Feb 2005 04:16:44 PM |
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On Wed, 02 Feb 2005 16:55:18 -0600, Tukla Ratte
<tukla_ratte@tukla.net> wrote:
Fred Stone wrote:
http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html
(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to
behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was
rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action
figure.
Bush Doll for President!
It's certainly much more intelligent.
--
Contempt of Congress meter reading-offscale.
Hello, theocracy with a fundamentalist US Supreme
Court who will ensure church and state are joined
at the hip like clergy and altar boys.
America 1776-Jan 2001 RIP
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| User: "Sean C" |
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| Title: Re: Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
02 Feb 2005 07:13:33 PM |
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In article <Xns95F16123C1C8Ffstone69@205.188.138.161>, Fred Stone
<fstone69@earthling.com> wrote:
http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html
(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to
behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was
rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action
figure.
Bush action figure, tired, but uninjured after daring rescue
The nine-inch-tall replica of the president left Andrews Air Force Base
in a scale model of Air Force One within minutes after the Pentagon
learned of the kidnapping from a picture on an Islamic website.
The top-secret flight was reminiscent of the life-size president's
Thanksgiving visit to Baghdad in 2003. During the long trip, the
presidential doll was programmed to say intimidating things in Arabic,
and reportedly spent several hours practicing his kung-fu grip.
Even as the mission was secretly under way, Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, D-
MA, went before the Senate to call for the immediate withdrawal of
12,000 military action figures from Iraq.
Upon hearing of the Bush doll's successful mission, Sen. John Kerry, D-
MA, warned against "overhyping" the significance of the apparently
heroic deed.
Little Georgie was later heard making mock screaming noises while
playing with the GI Joe Abu Ghraib Action Set.
Sean C
----== Posted via Newsfeeds.Com - Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==----
http://www.newsfeeds.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! 120,000+ Newsgroups
----= East and West-Coast Server Farms - Total Privacy via Encryption =----
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| User: "Kate " |
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| Title: Re: Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
02 Feb 2005 02:32:03 PM |
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On Wed, 2 Feb 2005 14:32:45 +0000 (UTC), Fred Stone
<fstone69@earthling.com> wrote:
http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html
(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to
behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was
rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action
figure.
Bush action figure, tired, but uninjured after daring rescue
The nine-inch-tall replica of the president left Andrews Air Force Base
in a scale model of Air Force One within minutes after the Pentagon
learned of the kidnapping from a picture on an Islamic website.
The top-secret flight was reminiscent of the life-size president's
Thanksgiving visit to Baghdad in 2003. During the long trip, the
presidential doll was programmed to say intimidating things in Arabic,
and reportedly spent several hours practicing his kung-fu grip.
Even as the mission was secretly under way, Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, D-
MA, went before the Senate to call for the immediate withdrawal of
12,000 military action figures from Iraq.
Upon hearing of the Bush doll's successful mission, Sen. John Kerry, D-
MA, warned against "overhyping" the significance of the apparently
heroic deed.
ROFL
Set yourself up for this one, didn't you?
The real story (extracted from Karl Rove's trash can)
The Bush nonaction figure, put it on his resume that he rescued the GI
Joe doll, but he really was in a bar two states over snorting cocaine.
The GI Joe doll rescued himself, but was tossed in the trash soon
afterwards because his doll repair benefits were cut out. Later on,
the Karl Rove voodoo doll, paid off several media action figures to
report that the GI Joe doll had had it coming, and wasn;t the Bush
doll magnificent for rescuing him.
No Kung Fu grip is actually available on the Bush nonaction figure,
although it says that there is several places on the box. However the
doll does stutter 'ffffflip fffflop' 200 times when the button is
pushed that is supposed to activate the shoot gun action.
Sen Kerry and Kennedy in a burst of laughter, warned of putting
confindence in dolls, and suggested that we all stop pretending and
use real men for important jobs such as presidents.
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| User: "Vic Sagerquist" |
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| Title: Re: Captive GI Joe rescued by Bush doll |
02 Feb 2005 01:03:16 PM |
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on 02 Feb 2005 in alt.atheism, Fred Stone dropped trou, farted, whirled,
then shouted:
http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html
(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to
behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was
rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action
figure.
Bush action figure, tired, but uninjured after daring rescue
The nine-inch-tall replica of the president left Andrews Air Force Base
in a scale model of Air Force One within minutes after the Pentagon
learned of the kidnapping from a picture on an Islamic website.
The top-secret flight was reminiscent of the life-size president's
Thanksgiving visit to Baghdad in 2003. During the long trip, the
presidential doll was programmed to say intimidating things in Arabic,
and reportedly spent several hours practicing his kung-fu grip.
Even as the mission was secretly under way, Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, D-
MA, went before the Senate to call for the immediate withdrawal of
12,000 military action figures from Iraq.
Upon hearing of the Bush doll's successful mission, Sen. John Kerry, D-
MA, warned against "overhyping" the significance of the apparently
heroic deed.
I see the dolls have a policy of grappling with the enemy, a la Clinton,
whereas the real Bush just writes off people held hostage as already lost,
calling it non-negotiation with terrorists.
--
Vic Sagerquist
aa#2011
Supervisor, EAC Department of little adhesive-backed "L" shaped
chrome-plastic doo-dads to add feet to Jesus fish department
______________
Why is it that most of the people who are against abortion are the kind of
people you wouldn't want to ***** in the first place?
--George Carlin
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