http://www.buzzflash.com/contributors/05/12/con05490.html

December 21, 2005
Who Needs the ACLU? Cheney Just Banned Jesus From the Senate
A BUZZFLASH GUEST CONTRIBUTION
by Chris Cronin

The American Civil Liberties Union has a long history of fighting for
the civil liberties of citizens and residents of the United States of
America.

Notoriously, their fight for the separation of church and state has
been at the forefront of this fight, and has recently been featured by
a judge in Pennsylvania who said Nyet! to creationism in public school
science classes.

And now, today, Jesus is finally gone from the Senate chambers, never
again to haunt that godless space.

For today, ***** Cheney stepped into the Senate and cast his vote in
favor of reducing funding for the poor and those who are fighting for
a leg up in society.

You see, Jesus -- a radical, Jewish religious figure from days of yore
(his birthday is coming up if I recall from a recent rant on Fox News)
-- used to tell people that helping poor people was good, and hoarding
wealth was bad.

He even said that camels pass through eyes of needles easier than rich
men get into heaven.

He also said things like, what you do to the least of my brothers you
have done to me.

A real radical, for sure.

But George Bush, President of the United States, fought hard alongside
***** Cheney and Congressional Republicans for the separation of church
and state throughout his tenure as president by granting tax breaks
which favored the wealthy, despite the commands and advice from his
radical religious mentor and favorite philosopher, Jesus Christ.

When the tax breaks led to huge deficits, George and his
civil-liberties-minded Republican Congressmen again fought for the
separation of Church and State and avoided Christ's advice and
commandments by reducing US aid to poor people to cover the
differences between spending and revenue.

That Jesus!

He does all he can to stay in our hearts and minds, and that's okay by
me.

But he needs to stay clear of government.

We have laws that even he would be subject to if he were being born
here with a homeless mother and without health care.

Perhaps there's a barn for people to be born in, given such
circumstances?

Anyway, thanks to the ACLU and the stalwart works of George Bush and
his Republican Congress, Jesus Christ is nowhere to be found in
American government today.

Whew!

Just in time for Christmas!

---
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"SUVs don't burn down by themselves." -- Some elf in a bunny suit
"ON lithium I am more stable than fredic liberal rice." -- Theodore Baldwin Boothe III