| Topic: |
Religions > Atheism |
| User: |
"L. Raymond" |
| Date: |
30 Nov 2003 01:24:10 PM |
| Object: |
Christians take their manure indoors |
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
***
Bishop in England wants clergy to mark Christmas with manure
LONDON (AP) - Bishop Lindsay Urwin of Horsham is urging his clergy to
bring buckets of manure into church to remind people that Jesus was
born in a stable.
Explaining the idea, Urwin said the strong aroma would remind
worshippers that Jesus gave his life to clear up the mess people make
of their lives. And, he added, it might discourage any objections to
use of incense in Christmas services.
"The incense - a symbol of divinity - together with the smell of
manure represents the paradox of the incarnation," he told the Church
Times newspaper.
Urwin said a priest suggested the idea during a meeting to discuss
ways of "bringing the old, old (Christmas) story to life."
Copyright 2003 Associated Press. All rights reserved.
***
This just goes to show that no matter how hard satirists try, they
just can't beat the real thing.
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| User: "jwk" |
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| Title: Re: Christians take their manure indoors |
02 Dec 2003 07:46:10 AM |
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(L. Raymond) wrote in message news:<3fca4383.852978@news.mylinuxisp.com>...
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
[snip]
Urwin said a priest suggested the idea during a meeting to discuss
ways of "bringing the old, old (Christmas) story to life."
Sounds like one priest made a wise crack and it went right over the bishop's head.
jwk
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| User: "L. Raymond" |
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| Title: Re: Christians take their manure indoors |
02 Dec 2003 09:24:18 AM |
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(jwk) wrote:
badaddress@mylinuxisp.com (L. Raymond) wrote in message news:<3fca4383.852978@news.mylinuxisp.com>...
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
[snip]
Urwin said a priest suggested the idea during a meeting to discuss
ways of "bringing the old, old (Christmas) story to life."
Sounds like one priest made a wise crack and it went right over the bishop's head.
That is just what I thought, too. I imagine a priest snickering into
his sleeve "Omigod! He bought it!!"
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| User: "*nemo*" |
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| Title: Re: Christians take their manure indoors |
30 Nov 2003 05:36:17 PM |
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In article <3fca4383.852978@news.mylinuxisp.com>,
(L. Raymond) wrote:
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
***
Bishop in England wants clergy to mark Christmas with manure
LONDON (AP) - Bishop Lindsay Urwin of Horsham is urging his clergy to
bring buckets of manure into church to remind people that Jesus was
born in a stable.
Explaining the idea, Urwin said the strong aroma would remind
worshippers that Jesus gave his life to clear up the mess people make
of their lives. And, he added, it might discourage any objections to
use of incense in Christmas services.
"The incense - a symbol of divinity - together with the smell of
manure represents the paradox of the incarnation," he told the Church
Times newspaper.
Urwin said a priest suggested the idea during a meeting to discuss
ways of "bringing the old, old (Christmas) story to life."
Copyright 2003 Associated Press. All rights reserved.
***
This just goes to show that no matter how hard satirists try, they
just can't beat the real thing.
You sure that story was AP instead of EAP? {;-)
--
Nemo - EAC Commissioner for Bible Belt Underwater Operations.
Atheist #1331 (the Palindrome of doom!)
BAAWA Knight! - One of those warm Southern Knights, y'all!
Charter member, SMASH!!
http://home.earthlink.net/~jehdjh/Relpg.html
Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titillandus
Quotemeister since March 2002
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| User: "L. Raymond" |
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| Title: Re: Christians take their manure indoors |
30 Nov 2003 06:57:48 PM |
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*nemo* <nemo0037@yahoo.dieSPAM.com> wrote:
badaddress@mylinuxisp.com (L. Raymond) wrote:
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
***
Bishop in England wants clergy to mark Christmas with manure
LONDON (AP) - Bishop Lindsay Urwin of Horsham is urging his clergy to
bring buckets of manure into church to remind people that Jesus was
born in a stable.
You sure that story was AP instead of EAP? {;-)
http://customwire.ap.org/dynamic/stories/R/RELIGION_BRIEFS?SITE=FLTAM&SECTION=US&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT
Scroll down to the bottom, read and be amused.
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| User: "Sean C" |
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| Title: Re: Christians take their manure indoors |
30 Nov 2003 02:19:44 PM |
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In article <3fca4383.852978@news.mylinuxisp.com>, L. Raymond
<badaddress@mylinuxisp.com> wrote:
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
***
Bishop in England wants clergy to mark Christmas with manure
LONDON (AP) - Bishop Lindsay Urwin of Horsham is urging his clergy to
bring buckets of manure into church to remind people that Jesus was
born in a stable.
It will also remind them that Christianity is a crock of *****.
Sean C
----== Posted via Newsfeed.Com - Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==----
http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups
---= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers - Total Privacy via Encryption =---
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| User: "johac" |
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| Title: Re: Christians take their manure indoors |
01 Dec 2003 12:41:03 AM |
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In article <301120031519448557%redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com>,
Sean C <redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com> wrote:
In article <3fca4383.852978@news.mylinuxisp.com>, L. Raymond
<badaddress@mylinuxisp.com> wrote:
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
***
Bishop in England wants clergy to mark Christmas with manure
LONDON (AP) - Bishop Lindsay Urwin of Horsham is urging his clergy to
bring buckets of manure into church to remind people that Jesus was
born in a stable.
It will also remind them that Christianity is a crock of *****.
Carrying manure into the church? Wouldn't that be like "carrying coal
to Newcastle"?
--
John Hachmann, aa #1782
- Question authority. Now more than ever. -
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| User: "stoney" |
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| Title: Re: Christians take their manure indoors |
02 Dec 2003 11:43:37 PM |
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On Sun, 30 Nov 2003 22:41:03 -0800, johac <jhachm@remove.ixpres.com>,
Message ID: <jhachm-B90789.22410330112003@news-central.ash.giganews.com>
wrote in alt.atheism;
In article <301120031519448557%redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com>,
Sean C <redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com> wrote:
In article <3fca4383.852978@news.mylinuxisp.com>, L. Raymond
<badaddress@mylinuxisp.com> wrote:
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
***
Bishop in England wants clergy to mark Christmas with manure
LONDON (AP) - Bishop Lindsay Urwin of Horsham is urging his clergy to
bring buckets of manure into church to remind people that Jesus was
born in a stable.
It will also remind them that Christianity is a crock of *****.
Carrying manure into the church? Wouldn't that be like "carrying coal
to Newcastle"?
Yes.
Stoney
"Designated Rascal and Rapscallion
and
SCAMPERMEISTER!"
When in doubt, SCAMPER about!
When things are fair, SCAMPER everywhere!
When things are rough, can't SCAMPER enough!
/end humour alert
alt.atheism military veteran #11
{so much for the 'no atheists in foxholes' rubbish}
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| User: "quibbler" |
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| Title: Re: Christians take their manure indoors |
01 Dec 2003 10:47:37 AM |
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In article <301120031519448557%redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com>,
redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com says...
In article <3fca4383.852978@news.mylinuxisp.com>, L. Raymond
<badaddress@mylinuxisp.com> wrote:
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
***
Bishop in England wants clergy to mark Christmas with manure
LONDON (AP) - Bishop Lindsay Urwin of Horsham is urging his clergy to
bring buckets of manure into church to remind people that Jesus was
born in a stable.
It will also remind them that Christianity is a crock of *****.
Yes and xers are rolled in that ***** every time they go to church.
So I agree that carrying in buckets of horseshit is a good idea. They
should cart in wheebarrows of ***** too. Then they should dump it
right in the middle of the floor and wallow in it. The preacher should
shovel it onto the altar and smear the hymnals with it. He should also
put a generous handful of ***** in his mouth before speaking. That might
make the pious turds he delivers, such as the virgin birth myth, sound
and smell more like the fecal matter that they are.
--
____________________________________________________
Quibbler (quibbler247atyahoo.com)
"It is fashionable to wax apocalyptic about the
threat to humanity posed by the AIDS virus, 'mad cow'
disease, and many others, but I think a case can be
made that faith is one of the world's great evils,
comparable to the smallpox virus but harder to
eradicate." -- Richard Dawkins
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| User: "\Clayton Driving His Temple Into The Money Changers" |
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| Title: Re: Christians take their manure indoors |
01 Dec 2003 06:01:19 PM |
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"quibbler" <quibbler247@atyahoo.com> wrote in message
news:MPG.1a351e87b345ecd9896e2@news.cis.dfn.de...
In article <301120031519448557%redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com>,
redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com says...
In article <3fca4383.852978@news.mylinuxisp.com>, L. Raymond
<badaddress@mylinuxisp.com> wrote:
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
***
Bishop in England wants clergy to mark Christmas with manure
LONDON (AP) - Bishop Lindsay Urwin of Horsham is urging his clergy to
bring buckets of manure into church to remind people that Jesus was
born in a stable.
It will also remind them that Christianity is a crock of *****.
Yes and xers are rolled in that ***** every time they go to church.
So I agree that carrying in buckets of horseshit is a good idea. They
should cart in wheebarrows of ***** too. Then they should dump it
right in the middle of the floor and wallow in it. The preacher should
shovel it onto the altar and smear the hymnals with it. He should also
put a generous handful of ***** in his mouth before speaking. That might
make the pious turds he delivers, such as the virgin birth myth, sound
and smell more like the fecal matter that they are.
...and it's also good for the roses!
--
____________________________________________________
Quibbler (quibbler247atyahoo.com)
"It is fashionable to wax apocalyptic about the
threat to humanity posed by the AIDS virus, 'mad cow'
disease, and many others, but I think a case can be
made that faith is one of the world's great evils,
comparable to the smallpox virus but harder to
eradicate." -- Richard Dawkins
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| User: "Khartoum" |
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| Title: Re: Christians take their manure indoors |
01 Dec 2003 08:40:08 PM |
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""Clayton Driving His Temple Into The Money Changers""
<cjfat@SPAMBLOCKoptusnet.com.au> wrote in message
news:3fcbd658$0$14056$afc38c87@news.optusnet.com.au...
"quibbler" <quibbler247@atyahoo.com> wrote in message
news:MPG.1a351e87b345ecd9896e2@news.cis.dfn.de...
In article <301120031519448557%redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com>,
redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com says...
In article <3fca4383.852978@news.mylinuxisp.com>, L. Raymond
<badaddress@mylinuxisp.com> wrote:
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
***
Bishop in England wants clergy to mark Christmas with manure
LONDON (AP) - Bishop Lindsay Urwin of Horsham is urging his clergy
to
bring buckets of manure into church to remind people that Jesus was
born in a stable.
It will also remind them that Christianity is a crock of *****.
Yes and xers are rolled in that ***** every time they go to church.
So I agree that carrying in buckets of horseshit is a good idea. They
should cart in wheebarrows of ***** too. Then they should dump it
right in the middle of the floor and wallow in it. The preacher should
shovel it onto the altar and smear the hymnals with it. He should also
put a generous handful of ***** in his mouth before speaking. That might
make the pious turds he delivers, such as the virgin birth myth, sound
and smell more like the fecal matter that they are.
..and it's also good for the roses!
If this takes off I will start attending church just for the manure. The
extra source of nitrogen for my compost pile and plants (including over 35
roses) can be put to use. If only I didn't have to put up with the
christers?
--
***********************************************
Khartoum aa#2110
When two men of science disagree, they do not invoke the secular arm; they
wait for further evidence to decide the issue, because, as men of science,
they know that neither is infallible. But when two theologians differ,
since there is no criteria to which either can appeal, there is nothing for
it but mutual hatred and an open or covert appeal to force.
Bertrand Russell
Can Religion Cure our Troubles 1954
--
____________________________________________________
Quibbler (quibbler247atyahoo.com)
"It is fashionable to wax apocalyptic about the
threat to humanity posed by the AIDS virus, 'mad cow'
disease, and many others, but I think a case can be
made that faith is one of the world's great evils,
comparable to the smallpox virus but harder to
eradicate." -- Richard Dawkins
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| User: "Robibnikoff" |
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| Title: Re: Christians take their manure indoors |
02 Dec 2003 08:44:32 AM |
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In article <3fcbd658$0$14056$afc38c87@news.optusnet.com.au>, \"Clayton Driving
His Temple Into The Money Changers\" says...
"quibbler" <quibbler247@atyahoo.com> wrote in message
news:MPG.1a351e87b345ecd9896e2@news.cis.dfn.de...
In article <301120031519448557%redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com>,
redhawk@burnspammersalivehvc.rr.com says...
In article <3fca4383.852978@news.mylinuxisp.com>, L. Raymond
<badaddress@mylinuxisp.com> wrote:
From the Associated Press's religious briefs:
***
Bishop in England wants clergy to mark Christmas with manure
LONDON (AP) - Bishop Lindsay Urwin of Horsham is urging his clergy to
bring buckets of manure into church to remind people that Jesus was
born in a stable.
It will also remind them that Christianity is a crock of *****.
Yes and xers are rolled in that ***** every time they go to church.
So I agree that carrying in buckets of horseshit is a good idea. They
should cart in wheebarrows of ***** too. Then they should dump it
right in the middle of the floor and wallow in it. The preacher should
shovel it onto the altar and smear the hymnals with it. He should also
put a generous handful of ***** in his mouth before speaking. That might
make the pious turds he delivers, such as the virgin birth myth, sound
and smell more like the fecal matter that they are.
..and it's also good for the roses!
Mary Kate? Is that you? ;)
Robyn
Resident Witchypoo & EAC Spellcaster
#1557
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