(EAP) WASHINGTON -- President Bush's plan to "conquer Mars"
has been widely misunderstood, say high White House sources.
"George Bush plans to conquer Mars, the ancient god of war,"
said an unnamed White House aide. "Not fly to the planet.
All this talk about planning excursions to Mars are for
Mount Olympus, where US troops will seek out all Gods of
Mass Destruction, such as Mars, or the lesser known war
gods Ares and Tyr."
Operation Prince of Peace is part of a logical progression
to show how the President's God can beat all other gods,
said a GOP strategist. "In an election year, fighting a
war against gods of war should attract both hawks and
doves to our side. In fact, if you're against this war,
you must be some sort of warmonger yourself."
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