Religions > Atheism > Greywolf brought up a good topic...being happy and content wherever we live irrespective of our surroundings.
| Topic: |
Religions > Atheism |
| User: |
"V" |
| Date: |
17 Sep 2007 02:20:04 PM |
| Object: |
Greywolf brought up a good topic...being happy and content wherever we live irrespective of our surroundings. |
Greywolf brought up a good topic...being happy and content wherever we
live irrespective of our surroundings.
Although this post deals with real estate more so than prison life,
the tools are interchangeable.
Happiness and contentment lies within us and not in our surrounding to
large degree.
And if we do find ourselves in prison we must always remember...all
our actions have consequences and many of our actions produce
consequences that end up destroying peace. They destroy our peace as
well as the inner peace of others.
A fellow on a list once asked for similar advice on how to become
happy and content while he lived in a small apartment located in the
center of congested, expensive, stressful and unhealthy city. He
wanted to divorce himself from the notion that happiness should
coincide with his living conditions. I agreed with him that we can
work on being happy and content wherever we live irrespective of our
surroundings. But I also had to say that our surroundings can and do
have an impact on us and we are not machines that can turn off stress
and problems that stem from our unhealthy living conditions and be
immune to it all.
Yes, we can work on being at peace even if someone is constantly
stabbing a knife in our side, but such a practice takes all our
energy. This is why many a contemplative become a 'renunciate' and
live like monks or nuns. They 'try' to remove much of life's worldly
irritants and distractions to focus on the spiritual path, so yes our
surroundings and lifestyle can matter to living a serene life.
Although some renunciates find that this life is not all it is cracked
up to be and they still must deal with 'personalities'' unless they
become a hermit.
I lived in L.A. for my first 35 years and them decided to relocate
with my family to a more affordable and safer local in 1989. The area
we moved to is the NE US. It is nothing flashy like L.A. or NY, but a
very relaxing area with clean air, low traffic and stress and much
wildlife such as deer, squirrels, wild turkeys and honking geese. I
enjoy relaxing on my hammock listening to owls hoot and woodpeckers
rat-a-tat-tat as I rock back and forth. Lots to do here if your into
nature - fishing, hunting, hiking, water and snow sports, etc. I live
with doctors, lawyers, successful business people in a really nice
area of town. The driving is generally uncongested and low key but
occasionally you get the hot head driver just like anyplace else - but
back in L.A., the peaceful driver was the exception and the hot head
honker was the rule.
Many a time as soon as the traffic light would change he or she was on
the horn with one hand as the other hand was used for the cell phone
or the Latte' and even with both hands tied up they would manage to
get the middle finger waving at you as they passed by. I live within
my means quite comfortably now. But, living within my means was always
an option irrespective of where I lived. The choice was always mine, I
just refused to do it in my prior life. We have been paying down our
house note and owe about $52,000 which is very affordable and do not
have to debt to live. If my current 2400 square foot, newish house was
transplanted to my old town of L.A. with the same type of
neighborhood, same size lot, it would sell for $2,000,000 or more -
yet we only paid about 9% of that in our area.
If I took the proceeds from the sale of our current house and decided
to buy a house in L.A., I could possibly buy a small house in Watts or
Compton. But from what I hear with house prices, I would not even be
able to afford one of these. We could probably afford to rent a 1 or 2
bedroom apartment, in a poor area of town, but that is it. I couldn't
live the lifestyle I enjoy today if I moved back to L.A. Where I live
compared to L.A. is quite different and they both have their pros and
cons. But it is good to be aware of the economic differences as well
as the differences in living standards and not blame oneself if you
choose to live in a tough area like L.A., NY, Tokyo or similar high
expense cities and have trouble making ends meet. If you choose to
live in such cities, then accept you will not have a high living
standard unless you make tons of money and are an exceptional earner.
Me, I am not an exceptional earner and accept this.
I once read how people living in Santa Barbara 'find their joy' in
just being able to live there. And do not get much joy from
exceptional homes, where a million dollars buys you next to nothing
and impressive homes are only for the very wealthy. So, if you choose
to live in a tough city and have trouble affording it, find your joy
with 'just' being able to live there. If I moved back to L.A. and
tried to reproduce my life through 'forcing things' I would surely run
into debt and eventually lose it all anyway since my lifestyle would
be artificial and not sustainable.
If I didn't have this theory of 'accepting and living within my
comfortable earning ability' on my side, I would call myself a failure
and an underearner for not earning the many hundreds of thousand of
dollars needed to reproduce and maintain the lifestyle I am enjoying
today. One should not beat oneself for not being able to live
comfortably in every environment under the sun. If we had no limits we
would not be humans...we would be gods. We all have limits, we all
come under natural law and are bound by certain capabilities. And the
successful person is one that accepts these limits and works to live
comfortably within them and does not get confused by enslaving
themselves to 'others' limits.
Take care,
V (Male)
Agnostic Freethinker
Practical Philosopher
AA#2
.
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| User: "brian fletcher" |
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| Title: Re: Greywolf brought up a good topic...being happy and content wherever we live irrespective of our surroundings. |
17 Sep 2007 07:04:09 PM |
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"V" <vfr44@aol.com> wrote in message
news:1190056804.249129.24390@d55g2000hsg.googlegroups.com...
Greywolf brought up a good topic...being happy and content wherever we
live irrespective of our surroundings.
Although this post deals with real estate more so than prison life,
the tools are interchangeable.
Happiness and contentment lies within us and not in our surrounding to
large degree.
The degree is proportional to the level of the awareness of our own potency
in the creative process.
The process is that of elimination.
And if we do find ourselves in prison we must always remember...all
our actions have consequences and many of our actions produce
consequences that end up destroying peace. They destroy our peace as
well as the inner peace of others.
Prison can take on many forms....
A fellow on a list once asked for similar advice on how to become
happy and content while he lived in a small apartment located in the
center of congested, expensive, stressful and unhealthy city. He
wanted to divorce himself from the notion that happiness should
coincide with his living conditions. I agreed with him that we can
work on being happy and content wherever we live irrespective of our
surroundings. But I also had to say that our surroundings can and do
have an impact on us and we are not machines that can turn off stress
and problems that stem from our unhealthy living conditions and be
immune to it all.
Spot on with your principle.The level of stress is proportional to the lack
of understanding of our own power to make a difference.
Of course, the ultimate surroundings are what we walk around in, the
attatched computer and how it is programmed.
I know many 'succesful' people who walk around in very disfunctional bodies.
Yes, we can work on being at peace even if someone is constantly
stabbing a knife in our side, but such a practice takes all our
energy. This is why many a contemplative become a 'renunciate' and
live like monks or nuns. They 'try' to remove much of life's worldly
irritants and distractions to focus on the spiritual path, so yes our
surroundings and lifestyle can matter to living a serene life.
Awareness of that process is just as likely to come about when one is also
surrounded with worldy material success.
In my experience, more so. Those that are on the lower socio economic scale,
are often dominated by their desire to improve their position.
Although some renunciates find that this life is not all it is cracked
up to be and they still must deal with 'personalities'' unless they
become a hermit.
There are an increasing number of captains of industry becoming
'hermitically' sealed :-)
I lived in L.A. for my first 35 years and them decided to relocate
with my family to a more affordable and safer local in 1989. The area
we moved to is the NE US. It is nothing flashy like L.A. or NY, but a
very relaxing area with clean air, low traffic and stress and much
wildlife such as deer, squirrels, wild turkeys and honking geese. I
enjoy relaxing on my hammock listening to owls hoot and woodpeckers
rat-a-tat-tat as I rock back and forth. Lots to do here if your into
nature - fishing, hunting, hiking, water and snow sports, etc. I live
with doctors, lawyers, successful business people in a really nice
area of town. The driving is generally uncongested and low key but
occasionally you get the hot head driver just like anyplace else - but
back in L.A., the peaceful driver was the exception and the hot head
honker was the rule.
Speaks "volumes" on how people exercise their choice.
So many endure the cut and thrust with the idea of the future reward of the
lifestyle you have just described.
I moved to Perth West Aus for the same reasons.Second to none in lifestyle,
with the highest stats of stress related disfunction, the worst example
being the highest rate of teenags suicide in the western world.
Not all is as it appears!!!
Many a time as soon as the traffic light would change he or she was on
the horn with one hand as the other hand was used for the cell phone
or the Latte' and even with both hands tied up they would manage to
get the middle finger waving at you as they passed by. I live within
my means quite comfortably now. But, living within my means was always
an option irrespective of where I lived. The choice was always mine, I
just refused to do it in my prior life. We have been paying down our
house note and owe about $52,000 which is very affordable and do not
have to debt to live. If my current 2400 square foot, newish house was
transplanted to my old town of L.A. with the same type of
neighborhood, same size lot, it would sell for $2,000,000 or more -
yet we only paid about 9% of that in our area.
If I took the proceeds from the sale of our current house and decided
to buy a house in L.A., I could possibly buy a small house in Watts or
Compton. But from what I hear with house prices, I would not even be
able to afford one of these. We could probably afford to rent a 1 or 2
bedroom apartment, in a poor area of town, but that is it. I couldn't
live the lifestyle I enjoy today if I moved back to L.A. Where I live
compared to L.A. is quite different and they both have their pros and
cons. But it is good to be aware of the economic differences as well
as the differences in living standards and not blame oneself if you
choose to live in a tough area like L.A., NY, Tokyo or similar high
expense cities and have trouble making ends meet. If you choose to
live in such cities, then accept you will not have a high living
standard unless you make tons of money and are an exceptional earner.
Me, I am not an exceptional earner and accept this.
I once read how people living in Santa Barbara 'find their joy' in
just being able to live there. And do not get much joy from
exceptional homes, where a million dollars buys you next to nothing
and impressive homes are only for the very wealthy. So, if you choose
to live in a tough city and have trouble affording it, find your joy
with 'just' being able to live there. If I moved back to L.A. and
tried to reproduce my life through 'forcing things' I would surely run
into debt and eventually lose it all anyway since my lifestyle would
be artificial and not sustainable.
If I didn't have this theory of 'accepting and living within my
comfortable earning ability' on my side, I would call myself a failure
and an underearner for not earning the many hundreds of thousand of
dollars needed to reproduce and maintain the lifestyle I am enjoying
today. One should not beat oneself for not being able to live
comfortably in every environment under the sun. If we had no limits we
would not be humans...we would be gods. We all have limits, we all
come under natural law and are bound by certain capabilities. And the
successful person is one that accepts these limits and works to live
comfortably within them and does not get confused by enslaving
themselves to 'others' limits.
Well said. One of the unique benefits in history, is to exercise such
choice.
So many people are stimulated by the principle of "catch up".
One of my favorite variations on the adage "dont bite off more than you can
chew", is "take the biggest bite you can , and chew like there's no
tomorrow".
It is no coincidence that the majority chose the latter.Heaven has many
manifestations!!!
BOfL
Take care,
V (Male)
Agnostic Freethinker
Practical Philosopher
AA#2
.
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| User: "Immortalist" |
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| Title: Re: Greywolf brought up a good topic...being happy and content wherever we live irrespective of our surroundings. |
17 Sep 2007 11:05:23 PM |
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On Sep 17, 12:20 pm, V <vf...@aol.com> wrote:
Greywolf brought up a good topic...being happy and content wherever we
live irrespective of our surroundings.
Although this post deals with real estate more so than prison life,
the tools are interchangeable.
Happiness and contentment lies within us and not in our surrounding to
large degree.
And if we do find ourselves in prison we must always remember...all
our actions have consequences and many of our actions produce
consequences that end up destroying peace. They destroy our peace as
well as the inner peace of others.
A fellow on a list once asked for similar advice on how to become
happy and content while he lived in a small apartment located in the
center of congested, expensive, stressful and unhealthy city. He
wanted to divorce himself from the notion that happiness should
coincide with his living conditions. I agreed with him that we can
work on being happy and content wherever we live irrespective of our
surroundings. But I also had to say that our surroundings can and do
have an impact on us and we are not machines that can turn off stress
and problems that stem from our unhealthy living conditions and be
immune to it all.
There are various ways to present the contrast to make one or the
other seem better or worse than the other.
The Social Animal - Elliot Aronson - 8th Edition 1999
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0716733129/
Reference Points and Contrast Effects. An object can appear to be
better or worse than it is, depending on the quality of objects it is
compared to. I suspect that all experienced salespeople implicitly
understand this phenomenon. Some act on it. Let me illustrate by
taking you house shopping with a real estate agent. After determining
your needs, the agent drives you to some homes "you might find of
interest." The first stop is a tiny two-bedroom house sitting on a
smallish lot. The house needs a new coat of paint; the interior is in
disarray; the linoleum in the kitchen is buckling; the living room
carpet is worn; the master bedroom is so small that an average-sized
bedroom suite simply won't fit. When the realtor tells you the asking
price, you are stunned. You exclaim, "Holy cow! They want that much
for this place? Who'd be dumb enough to pay so much for this shack?"
Certainly not you and probably not anyone else. But how do you suppose
viewing that dilapidated house might influence your evaluation of the
next house you are shown? Think about it.
In a sense, the dilapidated house can serve as a decoy-and decoys can
exercise a powerful impact on our judgment and behavior. This process
was nicely illustrated in an experiment by Anthony Pratkanis and his
colleagues. In this experiment, in the control condition, students
were asked to make a series of decisions such as the following: Which
would you select (a or b)?
a. Nutri-burger: a burger made from tofu and other vegetables that is
rated very good on nutrition but only average on taste.
b. Tasti-burger: a hamburger that is rated very good on taste but only
average on nutrition.
So far, so good. The decision is a clear one: If, for you, taste is
the more important consideration, you will go for the Tasti-burger; if
nutrition is the more important consideration, you will go for the
Nutri-burger. And in this experiment, roughly half of the students
selected the Tasti-burger and half selected the Nutri-burger.
But suppose we were working for the makers of Tasti-burger. How might
we increase your tendency to buy our product? We might insert a decoy.
A decoy is an alternative that is clearly inferior to other possible
selections-but serves the purpose of making one of the others look
good by comparison. In the Pratkanis experiment, half of the students
were given the following choice: Which would you prefer (a, b, or c)?
a. Nutri-burger: a burger made from tofu and other vegetables that is
rated very good on nutrition but only average on taste (exactly as
described in the control condition).
b. Tasti-burger: a hamburger that is rated very good on taste but only
average on nutrition (exactly as described in the control condition).
c. Bummer-burger: a hamburger that is rated only good on taste and
only average on nutrition.
No reasonable person would select the Bummer-burger; it is not as
nutritious as the Nutri-burger and not as flavorful as the Tasti-
burger. Although no reasonable person chose it, the Bummer-burger did
have an effect: In this condition, the Tasti-burger was chosen with
significantly greater frequency than the Nutri-burger.
How did this relatively worthless decoy change students' choices? The
answer in a nutshell is: the contrast effect. In contrast to the
Bummer-burger, the Tasti-burger looked great. When any object is
contrasted with something similar but not as good, or not as pretty,
or not as tall, that particular object is judged to be better,
prettier, and taller than would normally be the case. For example, if
a man of normal height (say, 5 feet 11 inches) is in the company of
midgets, he seems very tall. If he is a member of a professional
basketball team, he seems very short. Some of you may recall a young
man who played basketball for the Boston Celtics several years ago
named "Tiny" Archibald. Would it surprise you to learn that "Tiny"
stood 6 feet 1 inch tall? In Jonathan Swift's classic novel Gulliver's
Travels, the hero, a man of normal height, was considered a giant when
traveling among the residents of Lilliput and a dwarf when traveling
among the residents of Brobdingnag. This is the contrast effect.
One of my favorite examples of the contrast effect was produced in an
experiment by Douglas Kenrick and Sara Gutierres, who asked male
college students to rate the attractiveness of a potential blind date
before or after watching an episode of the popular television show
"Charlie's Angels." (As you will recall, the "angels" were
extraordinarily attractive young women.) The males rated their blind
date as far less attractive after they saw the show than before.
Presumably, the "angels" provided a stringent context for rating
attractiveness; almost anyone would suffer by contrast.
Contrast effects can occur subtly and can have powerful effects. A
used-car dealer may place an old clunker on the lot to "improve the
appearance" of the autos in its immediate vicinity. A presidential
candidate may select a vice-presidential running mate of lesser
stature to enhance the positive perception of his or her own
presidential qualities (Whatever became of Dan Quayle?). And that
dilapidated house the realtor showed you? You'll never buy it-but it
sure would make all the other houses you are shown appear more
attractive and like a greater bargain than they normally would have. r
The lesson to be learned from research on contrast effects is that the
selection of comparisons makes a difference. Depending on the context,
objects and alternatives can be made to look better or worse. Often we
do not pay much attention to the influence of context, much less
question the validity of the alternatives presented. This greatly
enhances the power of "context makers" such as politicians,
advertisers, journalists, and sales agents. The context they set can
influence our perceptions and judgments, lulling us into decisions
that we might not otherwise make.
The Social Animal - Elliot Aronson - 8th Edition 1999
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0716733129/
.
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| User: "turtoni" |
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| Title: Re: Greywolf brought up a good topic...being happy and content wherever we live irrespective of our surroundings. |
17 Sep 2007 11:47:49 PM |
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On Sep 17, 3:20 pm, V <vf...@aol.com> wrote:
Greywolf brought up a good topic...being happy and content wherever we
live irrespective of our surroundings.
Although this post deals with real estate more so than prison life,
the tools are interchangeable.
Happiness and contentment lies within us and not in our surrounding to
large degree.
And if we do find ourselves in prison we must always remember...all
our actions have consequences and many of our actions produce
consequences that end up destroying peace. They destroy our peace as
well as the inner peace of others.
A fellow on a list once asked for similar advice on how to become
happy and content while he lived in a small apartment located in the
center of congested, expensive, stressful and unhealthy city. He
wanted to divorce himself from the notion that happiness should
coincide with his living conditions. I agreed with him that we can
work on being happy and content wherever we live irrespective of our
surroundings. But I also had to say that our surroundings can and do
have an impact on us and we are not machines that can turn off stress
and problems that stem from our unhealthy living conditions and be
immune to it all.
Yes, we can work on being at peace even if someone is constantly
stabbing a knife in our side, but such a practice takes all our
energy. This is why many a contemplative become a 'renunciate' and
live like monks or nuns. They 'try' to remove much of life's worldly
irritants and distractions to focus on the spiritual path, so yes our
surroundings and lifestyle can matter to living a serene life.
Although some renunciates find that this life is not all it is cracked
up to be and they still must deal with 'personalities'' unless they
become a hermit.
I lived in L.A. for my first 35 years and them decided to relocate
with my family to a more affordable and safer local in 1989. The area
we moved to is the NE US. It is nothing flashy like L.A. or NY, but a
very relaxing area with clean air, low traffic and stress and much
wildlife such as deer, squirrels, wild turkeys and honking geese. I
enjoy relaxing on my hammock listening to owls hoot and woodpeckers
rat-a-tat-tat as I rock back and forth. Lots to do here if your into
nature - fishing, hunting, hiking, water and snow sports, etc. I live
with doctors, lawyers, successful business people in a really nice
area of town. The driving is generally uncongested and low key but
occasionally you get the hot head driver just like anyplace else - but
back in L.A., the peaceful driver was the exception and the hot head
honker was the rule.
Many a time as soon as the traffic light would change he or she was on
the horn with one hand as the other hand was used for the cell phone
or the Latte' and even with both hands tied up they would manage to
get the middle finger waving at you as they passed by. I live within
my means quite comfortably now. But, living within my means was always
an option irrespective of where I lived. The choice was always mine, I
just refused to do it in my prior life. We have been paying down our
house note and owe about $52,000 which is very affordable and do not
have to debt to live. If my current 2400 square foot, newish house was
transplanted to my old town of L.A. with the same type of
neighborhood, same size lot, it would sell for $2,000,000 or more -
yet we only paid about 9% of that in our area.
If I took the proceeds from the sale of our current house and decided
to buy a house in L.A., I could possibly buy a small house in Watts or
Compton. But from what I hear with house prices, I would not even be
able to afford one of these. We could probably afford to rent a 1 or 2
bedroom apartment, in a poor area of town, but that is it. I couldn't
live the lifestyle I enjoy today if I moved back to L.A. Where I live
compared to L.A. is quite different and they both have their pros and
cons. But it is good to be aware of the economic differences as well
as the differences in living standards and not blame oneself if you
choose to live in a tough area like L.A., NY, Tokyo or similar high
expense cities and have trouble making ends meet. If you choose to
live in such cities, then accept you will not have a high living
standard unless you make tons of money and are an exceptional earner.
Me, I am not an exceptional earner and accept this.
I once read how people living in Santa Barbara 'find their joy' in
just being able to live there. And do not get much joy from
exceptional homes, where a million dollars buys you next to nothing
and impressive homes are only for the very wealthy. So, if you choose
to live in a tough city and have trouble affording it, find your joy
with 'just' being able to live there. If I moved back to L.A. and
tried to reproduce my life through 'forcing things' I would surely run
into debt and eventually lose it all anyway since my lifestyle would
be artificial and not sustainable.
If I didn't have this theory of 'accepting and living within my
comfortable earning ability' on my side, I would call myself a failure
and an underearner for not earning the many hundreds of thousand of
dollars needed to reproduce and maintain the lifestyle I am enjoying
today. One should not beat oneself for not being able to live
comfortably in every environment under the sun. If we had no limits we
would not be humans...we would be gods. We all have limits, we all
come under natural law and are bound by certain capabilities. And the
successful person is one that accepts these limits and works to live
comfortably within them and does not get confused by enslaving
themselves to 'others' limits.
Take care,
V (Male)
Agnostic Freethinker
Practical Philosopher
AA#2
"Order and disorder co-exist in lifelong quests for a dynamic balance
that is never quite achieved."
HTH.
.
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| User: "marika" |
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| Title: Re: Greywolf brought up a good topic...being happy and content wherever we live irrespective of our surroundings. |
18 Sep 2007 10:49:04 PM |
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turtoni wrote in message <1190090869.495821.234870@50g2000hsm.googlegroups.com>...
"Order and disorder co-exist in lifelong quests for a dynamic balance
that is never quite achieved."
it's true that inventory management formulas like the old timey q one strive for balance but they don't always maximize profit
he link was in the very first email (or last depending what order you
read them). It was a really long link like three pages long
and what abpit that special of the day
mk5000
"Cazenovia is a small town of 300, was all of 420 when I lived there....no
crime, no violence, a picture perfect little town. Johnny is a 49 years
old, the nicest, kindest man you could ever met that loved his job....3
wonderful kids, great wife. He is my cousin. Pray for him"--buster
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