| Topic: |
Religions > Atheism |
| User: |
"quibbler" |
| Date: |
01 May 2006 09:31:22 PM |
| Object: |
If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the pointless,
stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****, fictional sacrifice.
Of course, I don't really take baptism seriously. But, if it is true
then it makes jebus effectively irrelevant as a means of washing away
sin. After all, most people take a fucking shower ever day. All they
need is a recording of some tin horn preacher saying the mumbo jumbo
words and bang, no more sins. If you bang a couple hookers and then
strangle them to death, just jump in the shower and bam, it's all good.
Screw crapaholic confessional BS. Self-adminstered baptism is easier and
you don't have to admit your sins to anyone else. And it doesn't require
any bloody, sado-masochistic creep like Jebus to hang on any cross. John
the Baptist was at least smart enough to just use water, one of the most
plentiful substances on Earth as his gimmick to dispose of moronic
concept of sin. John's shtick was later ungracefully melded into
xianity, despite its incongruities with the message of jebus.
Of course, this makes xianity a ridiculous mockery, but then, we already
knew that. BTW, it also means that baptists, who emphasize that original
non-xian ritual aren't real christians, but we already knew that too.
--
Quibbler (quibbler247atyahoo.com)
"It is fashionable to wax apocalyptic about the
threat to humanity posed by the AIDS virus, 'mad cow'
disease, and many others, but I think a case can be
made that faith is one of the world's great evils,
comparable to the smallpox virus but harder to
eradicate." -- Richard Dawkins
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| User: "Rev. Prunefinger" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
02 May 2006 10:18:00 AM |
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"quibbler" <quibbler247@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:MPG.1ec0726a794eeea7989976@news.readfreenews.net...
: If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the
pointless,
: stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****, fictional
sacrifice.
: Of course, I don't really take baptism seriously. But, if it is
true
: then it makes jebus effectively irrelevant as a means of washing
away
: sin. After all, most people take a fucking shower ever day.
I've got to point something out here....most people _don't_ shower
daily. You might be more or less correct in saying that most
Americans shower daily, but even that isn't likely. It isn't even
such a good idea.
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| User: "stoney" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
03 May 2006 06:11:31 PM |
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On Tue, 02 May 2006 15:18:00 GMT, "Rev. Prunefinger"
<misleart@ameritech.net> wrote in alt.atheism
"quibbler" <quibbler247@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:MPG.1ec0726a794eeea7989976@news.readfreenews.net...
: If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the
pointless,
: stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****, fictional
sacrifice.
: Of course, I don't really take baptism seriously. But, if it is
true
: then it makes jebus effectively irrelevant as a means of washing
away
: sin. After all, most people take a fucking shower ever day.
I've got to point something out here....most people _don't_ shower
daily. You might be more or less correct in saying that most
Americans shower daily, but even that isn't likely. It isn't even
such a good idea.
And 'Jesus' never had a shower in its fictional life.
--
Fundies and trolls are cordially invited to
shove a wooden cross up their arses and rotate
at a high rate of speed. I trust you'll
be 'blessed' with a plethora of splinters.
.
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| User: "stoney" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
03 May 2006 06:09:58 PM |
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On Mon, 1 May 2006 20:31:22 -0600, quibbler <quibbler247@yahoo.com>
wrote in alt.atheism
If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the pointless,
stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****, fictional sacrifice.
Since all are mere actors in a pointless play hitting their marks and
spouting their lines as was scripted eons ago by 'God' furiously spit
shining his bishop.....
[]
--
Fundies and trolls are cordially invited to
shove a wooden cross up their arses and rotate
at a high rate of speed. I trust you'll
be 'blessed' with a plethora of splinters.
.
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| User: "duke" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
02 May 2006 05:45:21 PM |
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On Mon, 1 May 2006 20:31:22 -0600, quibbler <quibbler247@yahoo.com> wrote:
If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the pointless,
stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****, fictional sacrifice.
Clearly, you don't know what baptism is a result thereof.
You have a lock on #3 position,
Of course, this makes xianity a ridiculous mockery, but then, we already
knew that.
We know you the #3 dumbass on the ng, that's what we know.
duke, American-American
*****
"The Mass is the most perfect form of Prayer."
Pope Paul VI
*****
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| User: "quibbler" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
03 May 2006 02:50:21 PM |
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In article <c5of52t82h9smrbf9qrkfk668gr37cb5ei@4ax.com>, duckgumbo32
@cox.net says...
On Mon, 1 May 2006 20:31:22 -0600, quibbler <quibbler247@yahoo.com> wrote:
If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the pointless,
stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****, fictional sacrifice.
Clearly, you don't know what baptism is a result thereof.
You have a lock on #3 position,
Of course, this makes xianity a ridiculous mockery, but then, we already
knew that.
We know you the #3 dumbass on the ng, that's what we know.
And you're the #1 dumbass in the universe.
--
Quibbler (quibbler247atyahoo.com)
"It is fashionable to wax apocalyptic about the
threat to humanity posed by the AIDS virus, 'mad cow'
disease, and many others, but I think a case can be
made that faith is one of the world's great evils,
comparable to the smallpox virus but harder to
eradicate." -- Richard Dawkins
.
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| User: "duke" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
03 May 2006 07:50:38 PM |
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On Wed, 3 May 2006 13:50:21 -0600, quibbler <quibbler247@yahoo.com> wrote:
We know you the #3 dumbass on the ng, that's what we know.
And you're the #1 dumbass in the universe.
No, that's yang. dud the bud is 2nd. You're #3 and david snowden is #4.
duke, American-American
*****
"The Mass is the most perfect form of Prayer."
Pope Paul VI
*****
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| User: "SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
02 May 2006 05:14:59 AM |
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maybe jesus gives you a ***** while you're showering to hep "cleanse your
soul"?
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| User: "quibbler" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
02 May 2006 07:35:50 AM |
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In article <DiG5g.256$Ae1.235@newsread1.news.pas.earthlink.net>,
killgod@killgod.com says...
maybe jesus gives you a ***** while you're showering to hep "cleanse your
soul"?
That might be the first useful thing that jesus ever did.
--
Quibbler (quibbler247atyahoo.com)
"It is fashionable to wax apocalyptic about the
threat to humanity posed by the AIDS virus, 'mad cow'
disease, and many others, but I think a case can be
made that faith is one of the world's great evils,
comparable to the smallpox virus but harder to
eradicate." -- Richard Dawkins
.
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| User: "SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
02 May 2006 06:49:30 PM |
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"quibbler" <quibbler247@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:MPG.1ec1000f793482d398997d@news.readfreenews.net...
In article <DiG5g.256$Ae1.235@newsread1.news.pas.earthlink.net>,
killgod@killgod.com says...
maybe jesus gives you a ***** while you're showering to hep "cleanse
your
soul"?
That might be the first useful thing that jesus ever did.
very true, wonder if he swallows ?
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| User: "Chris Johnson" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
03 May 2006 06:18:39 PM |
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SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim wrote:
"quibbler" <quibbler247@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:MPG.1ec1000f793482d398997d@news.readfreenews.net...
In article <DiG5g.256$Ae1.235@newsread1.news.pas.earthlink.net>,
killgod@killgod.com says...
maybe jesus gives you a ***** while you're showering to hep "cleanse
your
soul"?
That might be the first useful thing that jesus ever did.
very true, wonder if he swallows ?
It's only polite.
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| User: "Enkidu" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
01 May 2006 10:27:55 PM |
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quibbler <quibbler247@yahoo.com> wrote in
news:MPG.1ec0726a794eeea7989976@news.readfreenews.net:
If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the
pointless, stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****,
fictional sacrifice.
Maybe Jesus washes 'sin' off that spot in the middle of your back where
you can't reach? I use a back brush myself.
--
Enkidu AA#2165
http://www.thoughts.leaddogs.org/
EAC Chaplain and ordained minister,
ULC, Modesto, CA
PGP ID: 0xC4CE8CF0
So Dubya goes to war because god told him to.
There's a woman down in Texas who bashed in her kid's skulls for the same
reason.
-- Ed Krebs
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| User: "quibbler" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
01 May 2006 10:51:15 PM |
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In article <Xns97B6D02E1CF2E255229@130.133.1.4>,
says...
quibbler <quibbler247@yahoo.com> wrote in
news:MPG.1ec0726a794eeea7989976@news.readfreenews.net:
If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the
pointless, stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****,
fictional sacrifice.
Maybe Jesus washes 'sin' off that spot in the middle of your back where
you can't reach?
Maybe I'm just more flexible, or my arms are longer than some people, but
I don't think there's any stop on my back that I can't reach.
--
Quibbler (quibbler247atyahoo.com)
"It is fashionable to wax apocalyptic about the
threat to humanity posed by the AIDS virus, 'mad cow'
disease, and many others, but I think a case can be
made that faith is one of the world's great evils,
comparable to the smallpox virus but harder to
eradicate." -- Richard Dawkins
.
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| User: "duke" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
02 May 2006 05:46:04 PM |
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On 2 May 2006 03:27:55 GMT, Enkidu <jdwnx4702@sneakemail.com> wrote:
quibbler <quibbler247@yahoo.com> wrote in
news:MPG.1ec0726a794eeea7989976@news.readfreenews.net:
If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the
pointless, stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****,
fictional sacrifice.
Maybe Jesus washes 'sin' off that spot in the middle of your back where
you can't reach? I use a back brush myself.
Satan has something else in mind when you turn your back on him.
duke, American-American
*****
"The Mass is the most perfect form of Prayer."
Pope Paul VI
*****
.
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| User: "SpankyTClown" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
03 May 2006 07:31:44 AM |
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Much like an old man in dress that want you to call him father. Expect
usually the priest is understood when he asks the choirboy for a little
***** play. And do you know why? The priest is real, Satan is a figment
of your imagination.
duke wrote:
On 2 May 2006 03:27:55 GMT, Enkidu <jdwnx4702@sneakemail.com> wrote:
Satan has something else in mind when you turn your back on him.
duke, American-American
*****
"The Mass is the most perfect form of Prayer."
Pope Paul VI
*****
.
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| User: "Mark K. Bilbo" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
02 May 2006 08:18:47 AM |
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Previously, on alt.atheism, Enkidu in episode
<Xns97B6D02E1CF2E255229@130.133.1.4>...
quibbler <quibbler247@yahoo.com> wrote in
news:MPG.1ec0726a794eeea7989976@news.readfreenews.net:
If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the
pointless, stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****, fictional
sacrifice.
Maybe Jesus washes 'sin' off that spot in the middle of your back where
you can't reach? I use a back brush myself.
But Jesus scrubs your back in a manly, heterosexual way...
--
Mark K. Bilbo
--------------------------------------------------
"Corps chief admits to 'design failure'"
(Took them long enough)
http://makeashorterlink.com/?J3EF62DEC
"As hip as it is for outsiders to blame New Orleans
for everything bad that happened during and after
Hurricane Katrina, the truth is that the people
who lived here were much more prepared for a big
storm than the federal government that promised
us flood protection."
http://makeashorterlink.com/?V180525DC
"Everything New Orleans"
http://www.nola.com
.
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| User: "SpankyTClown" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
02 May 2006 09:39:57 AM |
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Mark K. Bilbo wrote:
Maybe Jesus washes 'sin' off that spot in the middle of your back where
you can't reach? I use a back brush myself.
But Jesus scrubs your back in a manly, heterosexual way...
....then performs a reach around for a happy ending.
SqUiRT sQuiRt!!
"Let jesus share of the pearl necklace."
.
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| User: "Mark K. Bilbo" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
02 May 2006 02:58:03 PM |
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Previously, on alt.atheism, SpankyTClown in episode
<1146580795.487796.267440@i40g2000cwc.googlegroups.com>...
Mark K. Bilbo wrote:
Maybe Jesus washes 'sin' off that spot in the middle of your back
where you can't reach? I use a back brush myself.
But Jesus scrubs your back in a manly, heterosexual way...
...then performs a reach around for a happy ending.
But a manly, heterosexual reach around!
--
Mark K. Bilbo
--------------------------------------------------
"Corps chief admits to 'design failure'"
(Took them long enough)
http://makeashorterlink.com/?J3EF62DEC
"As hip as it is for outsiders to blame New Orleans
for everything bad that happened during and after
Hurricane Katrina, the truth is that the people
who lived here were much more prepared for a big
storm than the federal government that promised
us flood protection."
http://makeashorterlink.com/?V180525DC
"Everything New Orleans"
http://www.nola.com
.
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| User: "Chris Johnson" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
03 May 2006 06:16:15 PM |
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Mark K. Bilbo wrote:
Previously, on alt.atheism, SpankyTClown in episode
<1146580795.487796.267440@i40g2000cwc.googlegroups.com>...
Mark K. Bilbo wrote:
Maybe Jesus washes 'sin' off that spot in the middle of your back
where you can't reach? I use a back brush myself.
But Jesus scrubs your back in a manly, heterosexual way...
...then performs a reach around for a happy ending.
But a manly, heterosexual reach around!
The kind you give when you lose a bet.
.
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| User: "Nosterill" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
02 May 2006 04:38:31 AM |
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quibbler wrote:
If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the pointless,
stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****, fictional sacrifice.
Of course, I don't really take baptism seriously. But, if it is true
then it makes jebus effectively irrelevant as a means of washing away
sin. After all, most people take a fucking shower ever day.
Most mornings I just take an ordinary shower - a fucking shower just
makes me late for work ;-)
.
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| User: "Mark K. Bilbo" |
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| Title: Re: If Baptism Washes Sin, Why Does Anyone Need Idiot Jebus? |
02 May 2006 08:17:42 AM |
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Previously, on alt.atheism, Nosterill in episode
<1146562711.752189.82990@e56g2000cwe.googlegroups.com>...
quibbler wrote:
If baptism washes away sins, as advertised, you don't need the
pointless, stupid, ridiculous blood of jebus or his fake *****, fictional
sacrifice. Of course, I don't really take baptism seriously. But, if it
is true then it makes jebus effectively irrelevant as a means of washing
away sin. After all, most people take a fucking shower ever day.
Most mornings I just take an ordinary shower - a fucking shower just makes
me late for work ;-)
SNORKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!
(Good thing I put the coffee down first)
--
Mark K. Bilbo
--------------------------------------------------
"Corps chief admits to 'design failure'"
(Took them long enough)
http://makeashorterlink.com/?J3EF62DEC
"As hip as it is for outsiders to blame New Orleans
for everything bad that happened during and after
Hurricane Katrina, the truth is that the people
who lived here were much more prepared for a big
storm than the federal government that promised
us flood protection."
http://makeashorterlink.com/?V180525DC
"Everything New Orleans"
http://www.nola.com
.
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