| Topic: |
Religions > Atheism |
| User: |
"" |
| Date: |
17 Mar 2006 03:48:57 PM |
| Object: |
in my email: NEW ELEMENT FOUND |
NEW ELEMENT FOUND
The recent hurricanes and gasoline issues are proof of the existence
of a new chemical element. A major research institution has recently
announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science.
The new element has been named "Governmentium." Governmentium
(Gv) has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and
198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which
are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be
detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into
contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction
that would normally take less than a second to take over four days to
complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 4 years; it does not decay,
but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the
assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact,
Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each
reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming
isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to
believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a
critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as
critical morass. When catalyzed with money, Governmentium
becomes Administratium - an element which radiates just as much
energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice
as many morons.
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| User: "Secret Squirrel" |
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| Title: Re: in my email: NEW ELEMENT FOUND |
18 Mar 2006 05:59:31 PM |
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-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----
buckeye-elo@nospam.net wrote in
news:olbm12hesghg9r938amjg42clrt6btcij1@4ax.com:
NEW ELEMENT FOUND
The recent hurricanes and gasoline issues are proof of the
existence
of a new chemical element. A major research institution has
recently
announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known
to science.
The new element has been named "Governmentium."
Governmentium
Old stuff; the original I saw had it "Administratium";
applicable to the corporate world, where I think it's
even more true.
Secret Squirrel
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