You heard me correct, sir! The Son of God himself has divinely
manifested his holy image for the world to see yet again! You've seen
him on burritos, on 900 ft buildings, on bowling alley chimneys, and
even in spaghetti noodles; now he's here once again, to shower the earth
with his magnificent glory. Behold the Lord Your Christ! Bow to the
vibrator so that ye may be saved!
The phallus in question belongs to one Antoine Rose of San Francisco,
California. ``We are truly blessed,'' said Rose of the Jesus
manifestation. ``I'm not one to pray very often, so that casts out all
doubts that this may be some kind of coincidence--it so happens that
Jesus appeared to me mere hours after I prayed for his blessing.''
Thousands have flocked to Rose's upscale apartment in downtown San
Francisco to witness the miracle of manifestation first hand. Said one
blessed pilgrim: ``I tou ched the ***** and now I can see! Thankya
Jesus!''
Antoine described the miraculous event to onlookers.
``Well I was about to ram Victor, my faithful *****, deep into the
cavity of my lover Hansel's ***** when something on the tip of it caught
my eye. At first I thought it was just some poop stain--but it wasn't
just any poop stain... it turned out to be the sacred image of Christ
Jesus Almighty!''
When questioned for comment, Hansel would say only that ``Jesus hurt''.
-----
Eric Alhazred
"Tis the season . . . ho, ho, ho motherfuckers."
--Hexar
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