| Topic: |
Religions > Atheism |
| User: |
"jwk" |
| Date: |
29 Aug 2003 07:47:22 AM |
| Object: |
New Airline Idea |
Thought I'd share this from Scott Adams (creator of Dilbert):
I noticed there are a lot of specialty airlines these days. For
example, Hooters has its own airline targeted at horny men, and Virgin has an
airline targeted at virgins. My idea is to start Atheist Airlines,
targeted at non-believers who want to avoid security delays.
At Atheist Air, prior to boarding, passengers would be required to
spout blasphemous remarks at a display of artifacts from all the major
religions. This effectively weeds out anyone who has a secret plan to meet
the Creator in the next few hours. Blasphemers would be allowed to
carry-on pickaxes, blowtorches, chainsaws, nun chucks, whatever, under the
theory that atheists generally try to avoid hurting other people in any
situation where there isn't a clear escape route.
jwk
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| User: "Hypatia Kosh" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
30 Aug 2003 05:25:01 PM |
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(jwk) wrote:
At Atheist Air, prior to boarding, passengers would be required to
spout blasphemous remarks at a display of artifacts from all the major
religions. This effectively weeds out anyone who has a secret plan to meet
the Creator in the next few hours. Blasphemers would be allowed to
carry-on pickaxes, blowtorches, chainsaws, nun chucks, whatever, under the
theory that atheists generally try to avoid hurting other people in any
situation where there isn't a clear escape route.
Won't work. The jihadis will just take up Lying for GAWD!
It was a good thought, though.
-Hypatia
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| User: "John Hattan" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
30 Aug 2003 05:56:44 PM |
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(Hypatia Kosh) wrote:
jwkinraleigh@yahoo.com (jwk) wrote:
At Atheist Air, prior to boarding, passengers would be required to
spout blasphemous remarks at a display of artifacts from all the major
religions. This effectively weeds out anyone who has a secret plan to meet
the Creator in the next few hours. Blasphemers would be allowed to
carry-on pickaxes, blowtorches, chainsaws, nun chucks, whatever, under the
theory that atheists generally try to avoid hurting other people in any
situation where there isn't a clear escape route.
Won't work. The jihadis will just take up Lying for GAWD!
You've also gotta touch a slice of bacon before boarding :)
---
John Hattan Grand High UberPope - First Church of Shatnerology
john@thecodezone.com http://www.shatnerology.com
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| User: "Robibnikoff" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
29 Aug 2003 09:56:47 AM |
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In article <c6f5ba32.0308290447.adad560@posting.google.com>, jwk says...
Thought I'd share this from Scott Adams (creator of Dilbert):
I noticed there are a lot of specialty airlines these days. For
example, Hooters has its own airline targeted at horny men, and Virgin has an
airline targeted at virgins. My idea is to start Atheist Airlines,
targeted at non-believers who want to avoid security delays.
At Atheist Air, prior to boarding, passengers would be required to
spout blasphemous remarks at a display of artifacts from all the major
religions. This effectively weeds out anyone who has a secret plan to meet
the Creator in the next few hours. Blasphemers would be allowed to
carry-on pickaxes, blowtorches, chainsaws, nun chucks, whatever, under the
theory that atheists generally try to avoid hurting other people in any
situation where there isn't a clear escape route.
LOl, cute!
However, I'm still waiting for Chippendale Airlines :)
Robyn
Resident Witchypoo & EAC Spellcaster
#1557
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| User: "Brian E. Clark" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
29 Aug 2003 12:02:47 PM |
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Robibnikoff <nospam@newsranger.com> wrote:
However, I'm still waiting for Chippendale Airlines :)
Granted. You can now fly in a cabin infested with hordes of mischievous
chipmunks! ;-)
--
-----------
Brian E. Clark
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| User: "Robibnikoff" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
29 Aug 2003 12:38:17 PM |
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In article <MPG.19b951f91d1d308f989eff@netnews.comcast.net>, Brian E. Clark
says...
Robibnikoff <nospam@newsranger.com> wrote:
However, I'm still waiting for Chippendale Airlines :)
Granted. You can now fly in a cabin infested with hordes of mischievous
chipmunks! ;-)
LOL - I just KNEW someone was going to say something like that ;)
Robyn
Resident Witchypoo & EAC Spellcaster
#1557
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| User: "Elroy Willis" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
29 Aug 2003 01:25:44 PM |
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Robibnikoff <nospam@newsranger.com> wrote in alt.atheism
Brian E. Clark says...
Robibnikoff <nospam@newsranger.com> wrote:
However, I'm still waiting for Chippendale Airlines :)
Granted. You can now fly in a cabin infested with hordes of mischievous
chipmunks! ;-)
LOL - I just KNEW someone was going to say something like that ;)
Free helium-filled balloons would be passed out along with cocktails,
and people would be encouraged to inhale the helium to make for a more
fun-filled flight?
--
Elroy Willis
EAP Chief Editor and Newshound
http://web2.airmail.net/~elo/news
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| User: "Old Noah" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
29 Aug 2003 06:08:03 PM |
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Elroy Willis wrote:
Robibnikoff <nospam@newsranger.com> wrote in alt.atheism
Brian E. Clark says...
Robibnikoff <nospam@newsranger.com> wrote:
However, I'm still waiting for Chippendale Airlines :)
Granted. You can now fly in a cabin infested with hordes of mischievous
chipmunks! ;-)
LOL - I just KNEW someone was going to say something like that ;)
Free helium-filled balloons would be passed out along with cocktails,
and people would be encouraged to inhale the helium to make for a more
fun-filled flight?
Oh, jeez here's party pooper Glenn getting up on his high horse about
helium again. Here goes:
The MSDS for helium lists helium as a simple asphyxiant. Several TV
commercials (Most notably a federal express commercial) featuring a
person talking with helium have been pulled from the air, due to the
safety hazard.
Asphyxiation: death due to a lack of oxygen, esp. in the blood.
Breathing any gas which contains no oxygen is EXTREMELY dangerous, as
oxygen tends to move from places of high concentration to places of low
concentration.
That is, if the partial pressure of oxygen in the lungs is lower than
the partial pressure of oxygen in the blood, the lungs will actually
REMOVE oxygen from the blood. With the next heartbeat, oxygen depleted
blood is sent to the brain, which can shut down, leading to a quick (but
painless) death.
Ok, you ask, "I've been breathing He at parties for years and I'm not
dead yet. Why not?"
Answer 1: You're lucky.
The real answer: You're breathing out of a balloon, and it's not easy to
take a full breath. Cases where people have killed themselves breathing
helium generally involve carefully exhaling, and then taking a long draw
on the balloon, or filling something other than a balloon (such as a
plastic bag) from which a deeper breath can be easily drawn, or
breathing from a balloon repeatedly.
In the breathing from a plastic bag case, death can be essentially
immediate, as the heart pumps oxygen depleted blood to the brain, which
simply shuts down.
Most helium related injuries are injuries from falls, especially where
the victim hits their head as they fall. Asphyxia causes a kind of
dizziness which is different from, say, drunkenness. It's virtually
impossible to compensate for.
Some really bright people have hit on a better (immensely more painful)
way of killing themselves, by trying to get a deep breath out of the
balloon filling regulator. This results in overinflation of the lungs
and subsequent rupturing. The victim either bleeds to death, or drowns
in their own blood.
If you still feel that you need to talk funny, try filling a balloon
halfway with air, (or better yet, 1/5 of the way full of oxygen, since
air is 20.9% Oxygen) and them fill the balloon the rest of the way with
Helium. This guarantees that the gas you are breathing will not be
oxygen deficient.
Glenn Arnold
P.S. I figured someone would ask for a link, so here's one:
http://www.cganet.com/N2O/helium_safety.htm
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| User: "Old Noah" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
30 Aug 2003 01:00:12 PM |
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Robibnikoff wrote:
In article <ghpvkvg72enm3c08c69vmtffc29u136ghj@4ax.com>, Elroy Willis says...
Old Noah <oldnoah@att.net> wrote in alt.atheism
Elroy Willis wrote:
Robibnikoff <nospam@newsranger.com> wrote in alt.atheism
Brian E. Clark says...
Robibnikoff <nospam@newsranger.com> wrote:
However, I'm still waiting for Chippendale Airlines :)
Granted. You can now fly in a cabin infested with hordes of mischievous
chipmunks! ;-)
LOL - I just KNEW someone was going to say something like that ;)
Free helium-filled balloons would be passed out along with cocktails,
and people would be encouraged to inhale the helium to make for a more
fun-filled flight?
Oh, jeez here's party pooper Glenn getting up on his high horse about
helium again.
You're right about that!
<knocks Glenn off his soapbox-looking high horse>
Don't try that again, okay?
I've read too many reports on people dying from asphyxiation. Helium is
only one of the culprits. And I once got lightheaded when we were
filling a simulated ladle with nitrogen (outdoors, for "proper
ventilation"), so I know how unexpected it can be. Nope, I won't get off
my horse.
Why do I feel like I just walked into the wrong part of the conversation? ;)
Well then you'll just have to go back and read my earlier post, won't
you? ;)
Glenn Arnold
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| User: "Gregory Gadow" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
29 Aug 2003 10:22:57 AM |
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Robibnikoff wrote:
In article <c6f5ba32.0308290447.adad560@posting.google.com>, jwk says...
Thought I'd share this from Scott Adams (creator of Dilbert):
I noticed there are a lot of specialty airlines these days. For
example, Hooters has its own airline targeted at horny men, and Virgin has an
airline targeted at virgins. My idea is to start Atheist Airlines,
targeted at non-believers who want to avoid security delays.
At Atheist Air, prior to boarding, passengers would be required to
spout blasphemous remarks at a display of artifacts from all the major
religions. This effectively weeds out anyone who has a secret plan to meet
the Creator in the next few hours. Blasphemers would be allowed to
carry-on pickaxes, blowtorches, chainsaws, nun chucks, whatever, under the
theory that atheists generally try to avoid hurting other people in any
situation where there isn't a clear escape route.
LOl, cute!
However, I'm still waiting for Chippendale Airlines :)
<inserts appropriately lewd comment about salted nuts and cocktails>
--
Gregory Gadow
techbear@serv.net
http://www.serv.net/~techbear
Is your faith so weak and your god so powerless
that, without government endorsement of your
religion, all hell will break loose?
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| User: "Gregory Gadow" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
29 Aug 2003 12:43:01 PM |
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Robibnikoff wrote:
In article <3F4F6FD1.87BD4154@serv.net>, Gregory Gadow says...
Robibnikoff wrote:
In article <c6f5ba32.0308290447.adad560@posting.google.com>, jwk says...
Thought I'd share this from Scott Adams (creator of Dilbert):
I noticed there are a lot of specialty airlines these days. For
example, Hooters has its own airline targeted at horny men, and Virgin has an
airline targeted at virgins. My idea is to start Atheist Airlines,
targeted at non-believers who want to avoid security delays.
At Atheist Air, prior to boarding, passengers would be required to
spout blasphemous remarks at a display of artifacts from all the major
religions. This effectively weeds out anyone who has a secret plan to meet
the Creator in the next few hours. Blasphemers would be allowed to
carry-on pickaxes, blowtorches, chainsaws, nun chucks, whatever, under the
theory that atheists generally try to avoid hurting other people in any
situation where there isn't a clear escape route.
LOl, cute!
However, I'm still waiting for Chippendale Airlines :)
<inserts appropriately lewd comment about salted nuts and cocktails>
Whoa! Get your mind out of the gutter, young man! :)
Why? There's plenty of room for you. <grin>
--
Gregory Gadow
techbear@serv.net
http://www.serv.net/~techbear
Is your faith so weak and your god so powerless
that, without government endorsement of your
religion, all hell will break loose?
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| User: "J Forbes" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
29 Aug 2003 03:29:09 PM |
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jwk wrote:
Thought I'd share this from Scott Adams (creator of Dilbert):
I noticed there are a lot of specialty airlines these days. For
example, Hooters has its own airline targeted at horny men, and Virgin has an
airline targeted at virgins. My idea is to start Atheist Airlines,
targeted at non-believers who want to avoid security delays.
At Atheist Air, prior to boarding, passengers would be required to
spout blasphemous remarks at a display of artifacts from all the major
religions. This effectively weeds out anyone who has a secret plan to meet
the Creator in the next few hours. Blasphemers would be allowed to
carry-on pickaxes, blowtorches, chainsaws, nun chucks, whatever, under the
theory that atheists generally try to avoid hurting other people in any
situation where there isn't a clear escape route.
I don't get it.
--
Jim
Visit the Selectric Typewriter Museum!
http://www.mindspring.com/~jforbes2
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| User: "TCS" |
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| Title: Re: New Airline Idea |
29 Aug 2003 04:35:41 PM |
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On Fri, 29 Aug 2003 20:29:09 GMT, J Forbes <jforbspam@fastmail.fm> wrote:
jwk wrote:
Thought I'd share this from Scott Adams (creator of Dilbert):
I noticed there are a lot of specialty airlines these days. For
example, Hooters has its own airline targeted at horny men, and Virgin has an
airline targeted at virgins. My idea is to start Atheist Airlines,
targeted at non-believers who want to avoid security delays.
At Atheist Air, prior to boarding, passengers would be required to
spout blasphemous remarks at a display of artifacts from all the major
religions. This effectively weeds out anyone who has a secret plan to meet
the Creator in the next few hours. Blasphemers would be allowed to
carry-on pickaxes, blowtorches, chainsaws, nun chucks, whatever, under the
theory that atheists generally try to avoid hurting other people in any
situation where there isn't a clear escape route.
I don't get it.
If you don't believe in an afterlife, you're less likely to blow
yourselves to bits...
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