One of the people in the American Atheist
chat group posted this. The author is
unknown.


The recent hurricane and gasoline issues
helped prove the existence of a new element.
In early October [2005] a major research
institution announced discovery of the
heaviest element yet known to science. The
new element has been named
"Governmentium."

Governmentium (Gv) has one neutron, 25
assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons,
and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving
it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by
forces called morons, which are
surrounded by vast quantities of lepton like
particles called peons. Since Gv has no
electrons, it is inert. However, it can be
detected, because it impedes every
reaction with which it comes into contact.
A minute amount of Gv causes one
reaction to take over four days to complete,
when it would normally take less than a
second!

Gv has a normal half-life of 4 years; it
does not decay, but instead undergoes
a reorganization in which a portion of the
assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons
exchange places.

In fact, Governmentium's mass will
actually increase over time, since each
reorganization will cause more morons to
become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion
leads some scientists to believe that Gv
is formed whenever morons reach a certain
quantity in concentration. This hypothetical
quantity is referred to as Critical Morass.

When catalyzed with money, Gv becomes
Administratium (Am) - an element which
radiates just as much energy as Gv since it
has half as many peons but twice as many
morons.

One of the people in the American Atheist
chat group posted this. The author is
unknown.


The recent hurricane and gasoline issues
helped prove the existence of a new element.
In early October [2005] a major research
institution announced discovery of the
heaviest element yet known to science. The
new element has been named
"Governmentium."

Governmentium (Gv) has one neutron, 25
assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons,
and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving
it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by
forces called morons, which are
surrounded by vast quantities of lepton like
particles called peons. Since Gv has no
electrons, it is inert. However, it can be
detected, because it impedes every
reaction with which it comes into contact.
A minute amount of Gv causes one
reaction to take over four days to complete,
when it would normally take less than a
second!

Gv has a normal half-life of 4 years; it
does not decay, but instead undergoes
a reorganization in which a portion of the
assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons
exchange places.

In fact, Governmentium's mass will
actually increase over time, since each
reorganization will cause more morons to
become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion
leads some scientists to believe that Gv
is formed whenever morons reach a certain
quantity in concentration. This hypothetical
quantity is referred to as Critical Morass.

When catalyzed with money, Gv becomes
Administratium (Am) - an element which
radiates just as much energy as Gv since it
has half as many peons but twice as many
morons.



--
^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^
Michelle Malkin (Mickey) aa list#1
BAAWA Knight & Bible Thumper Thumper
^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^
I remember another gentle visitor from the heavens,
he came in peace and then died, only to come
back to life, and his name was E.T., the extra
terrestrial. I loved that little guy. -Reverend
Lovejoy (The Simpsons)
^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^

One of the people in the American Atheist
chat group posted this. The author is
unknown.


The recent hurricane and gasoline issues
helped prove the existence of a new element.
In early October [2005] a major research
institution announced discovery of the
heaviest element yet known to science. The
new element has been named
"Governmentium."