http://www.office-humour.co.uk/g/i/2971/
Drinking types
New York City bartenders were asked if they could nail a woman's
personality based on what she drinks. Though interviewed separately,
they concurred on almost all counts.
The results:
Beer :-Personality: Casual, low-maintenance; down to earth. Your
Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool.
Blender Drinks :-Personality: Flaky, annoying; a pain in the *****. Your
Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy.
Mixed Drinks :-Personality: Older, has picky taste; knows what she
wants. Your Approach: You won't have to approach her. She'll send YOU a
drink.
Wine :- (does not include white zinfandel, see below) :-Personality:
Conservative and classy, sophisticated. Your Approach: Tell her you wish
Reagan had had four more years...
White Zinfandel :-Personality: Easy; thinks she is classy and
sophisticated, actually has no clue. Your approach: Make her feel
smarter than she is...
Shots :-Personality: Likes to hang with frat-boy pals and looking to get
totally drunk... and naked. Your Approach: Easiest hit in the joint. You
have been blessed. Nothing to do but wait, however, be careful not to
make her mad!
Tequila :-No explanations required - everyone just KNOWS what happens
there.
THEN, there is the MALE addendum ---- The deal with guys is, as always,
very simple and clear cut:
Domestic Beer: He's poor and wants to get laid.
Imported Beer: He likes good beer and wants to get laid.
Wine: He is hoping that the wine will give him a sophisticated image to
help him get laid.
Whisky: He doesn't give a damn about anything but getting laid.
Tequila: He is thinking he has a chance with the toothless waitress.
White Zinfandel: He's gay!
--
Fundies and trolls are cordially invited to
shove a wooden cross up their arses and rotate
at a high rate of speed. I trust you'll
be 'blessed' with a cornucopia of splinters.
.
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