| Topic: |
Religions > Atheism |
| User: |
"footybet" |
| Date: |
29 Jan 2005 02:59:20 PM |
| Object: |
OT Roses Peace Warrior |
would you be so kind as to read and criticise the first 3 ch=ADapters of
my book=20
http://www.writingforums.com/viewtopic.php?t=3D10928
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| User: "Al Klein" |
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| Title: Re: OT Roses Peace Warrior |
29 Jan 2005 06:11:23 PM |
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On 29 Jan 2005 06:59:20 -0800, "footybet" <damian@bleachboys.com> said
in alt.atheism:
would you be so kind as to read and criticise the first 3 chapters of
my book
Two thoughts:
1) At that time, 250 people would have been a largish village, at
least, not a small hamlet. (I'm not an expert on the period, just
interested in it.)
2) One spins wool into yarn. One weaves yarn into cloth. One doesn't
spin cloth.
As a first draft it's good. I think you should research the time a
little, though - the little technical details. They're too well-known
for you to be able to get by if you aren't accurate. And the comments
about sentence structure are good advice.
--
"Creationists are the best evidence we have that there is no intelligent design."
-Josef Balluch
(random sig, produced by SigChanger)
rukbat at verizon dot net
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