| Topic: |
Religions > Atheism |
| User: |
"St. Jackanapes" |
| Date: |
16 Jun 2007 08:01:07 AM |
| Object: |
Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
In vegas.personals.swingers, Un Saved said...
"IF YOU WANT A NATION RULED BY RELIGON MOVE TO IRAN"
If you need Jesus toilet paper, just grab a bible and rip out a page
from the New Testament. Make sure to take a bible with you should you go
camping this summer. Wiping ***** from your ***** with the words of
Christ sure beats using a leaf. Since it's the Lord's paper, you know
that your finger won't poke a hole in it and get feces under your
fingernail. Be careful, though - Bible paper ain't Charmin, by any
stretch of the imagination. That's a pretty sensitive area to be getting
a paper cut!
--
St. Jackanapes ~ Bearer of The One True Liver ~
Ordained Minister & Holy Saint of The Universal Life Church
----------------------------------------------------------------------
WEBSITE: http://www.jackanapes.ws/ | FORUM: http://www.voy.com/20630/
----------------------------------------------------------------------
THE A.F.J.C. MELTY AWARD FOR SPRING 2007: http://tinyurl.com/3db2bq/
"The ejaculate from satan has the consistency and smell of emesis."
- Andrew B. Chung, MD/PhD
.
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| User: "No Reply" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
26 Jun 2007 02:58:10 PM |
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"St. Jackanapes" <larry_jackowskiNOSPAM@MAPSONhotmail.com> wrote in message news:10tcfu.l5b.19.3@news.alt.net...
Don't be a jackanapes!
http://76.162.173.93/stj.jpg
Use alias: St. Jackanapes as a basis for counterfeit.
"Do not give dogs what is holy; and do not throw your
pearls before swine, lest they trample them under foot
and turn to attack you." (Matthew 7:6 RSV)
.. The Total Collapse (Death) Of Atheism
http://76.162.173.93/uit/coa/
.. Marx/Lennon (Liberal Socialism)
http://76.162.173.93/uit/mls/
.. Cosmic Humanist Worldview
http://76.162.173.93/uit/chw/chw.wmv
.. Secular Humanist Worldview
http://76.162.173.93/uit/shw/shw.wmv
.. Biblical Christian Worldview
http://76.162.173.93/uit/bcw/bcw.wmv
.. The Perfect Stranger
http://76.162.173.93/misc/tps/
.. Are You Going To Heaven?
http://76.162.173.93/misc/aygth.wmv
.. My Redeemer Lives!
http://76.162.173.93/misc/mrl.wmv
.. Mormonism - Joseph Smith's Temple of Doom
http://76.162.173.93/uit/mor/
.. Spiritual Warfare
http://76.162.173.93/guest/=CD-R=spiritual-warfare/
.. The Way of the Master Series
http://76.162.173.93/wms/
.. Investigating Jesus
http://76.162.199.209/_/
.. Romans Audio Bible Study
http://76.162.173.93/bible-study/=CD-R=romans/
"Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's
clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves." (Matthew 7:15 RSV)
.. The MP3 Streaming Audio Series
.. http://76.162.173.93/members/=CD-R=r-c-sproul/
.. login: guest password: guest
------------------------------------------------------------
Born Again - Understanding the Gospel - Willing to Believe
For a limited time, these series are available here.
http://76.162.173.93/members/=CD-R=r-c-sproul-2nd-set/
login: guest password: guest
------------------------------------------------------------
.. Overview the Bible
http://76.162.173.93/bible-study/=CD-R=ltb-24/
.. There's no hurry?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrmDWn6awMA
"The best way to drive out the devil, if he will
not yield to texts of Scripture, is to jeer and
flout him, for he cannot bear scorn."
.. Heaven & Hell
http://76.162.173.93/prophecy/=CD-R=heaven-and-hell/
.. The Gospel of Matthew
http://76.162.173.93/bible-study/=CD-R=matthew-rv/
.. A Primer on Prophecy
http://76.162.173.93//prophecy/=CD-R=prophecy-101-small-wmv
.. Born once, die twice. Born twice, die once.
------------------------------------------------------------
A Workman Approved By God
A Hermeneutical Study on Bible Doctrine
http://76.162.173.93/members/awabg/
login: guest password: guest
------------------------------------------------------------
.. Wisdom of a Lifetime - Audio MP3 Collection -
http://bibleweb.info/ftp/ftp-members-0002.html
.. The Last (5th) Horseman
http://bibleweb.info/ftp/ftp-members-0003.html
.. The Facts About Jesus, the Bible & the Afterlife
http://bibleweb.info/ftp/ftp-members-0004.html
.. The Way - http://john-14-6.com/john-14-6.pdf
.. A Tribute to THE KING
http://bibleweb.info/public-a-tribute-to-the-king.pdf
.. How to Spot a Counterfeit
http://76.162.173.93/guest/ar-mp3/ar-how-to-spot-a-counterfeit.mp3
But there were also false prophets among the people, just as there
will be false teachers among you. They will secretly bring in
destructive heresies, even denying the Master who bought them, and
will bring swift destruction on themselves (2 Peter 2:1).
.. Scriptural Christianity
http://76.162.173.93/guest/=CD-R=scriptural-christianity/
My Main Collection - http://Bibleweb.Info/
.. Maranatha!
.
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| User: "No One" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
30 Jun 2007 08:26:18 AM |
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"St. Jackanapes" <larry_jackowskiNOSPAM@MAPSONhotmail.com> wrote in message news:10tcfu.l5b.19.3@news.alt.net...
This the 1st in a series of Synthetic Studies of the New Testament.
.. Matthew
General Impact
.. Jesus Christ, the Savior of the world, is "the Son of Abraham", and
David, He qualifies as Israel's messianic King.
.. Matthew uses a topical rather than a chronological arrangement of his
material in order to develop a crucial pattern in Christ's ministry.
.. The works of the Lord are presented in a series of ten miracles.
.. There is a series of reactions to Christ's words and works.
.. Jesus communicates the significance of accepting or rejecting His offer
of righteousness.
.. He also describes His second coming as the Judge and Lord of the
earth.
.. Authenticating His words and works are the empty tomb, Resurrection,
and appearance, all proving that Jesus Christ is indeed the prophesied
Messiah, the very Son of God.
.. Christ's final ministry in Judea reaches a climax at the cross as the King
willingly gives up His life to redeem sinful persons. Jesus endures
awesome human hatred in this great demonstration of divine love. His
perfect sacrifice is acceptable, and this gospel concludes with His
glorious resurrection.
Atmosphere as a Whole
Matthew presents Jesus as Israel's messianic King, the long awaited
Messiah.
The Old Testament prophets predicted and longed for the coming of the
Anointed One who would enter history to bring redemption and
deliverance. The first verse of Matthew announces that long-awaited
event: "The book of the genealogy of Jesus Christ, the Son of David, the
Son of Abraham." Matthew provides the essential bridge between the
Old and New Testaments. Matthew documents Jesus Christ's claim to
be Messiah. Jesus possesses the credentials of Messiah, ministers in the
predicted pattern of Messiah, preaches messages only Messiah could
preach, and finally dies the death only Messiah could die.
Highlights
.. The Presentation of the King (1:1-4:11)
.. The Proclamation of the King (4:12-7:29)
.. The Power of the King (8:1-11:1)
.. The Progressive Rejection of the King (11:2-16:12)
.. The Preparation of the King's Disciples (16:13-20:28)
.. The Presentation and Rejection of the King (20:29-27:66)
.. The Proof of the King (28:1-20)
Personal Application
Principle: Matthew wanted his readers to do what John the Baptist and
Jesus called the people of their day to do, namely "Repent, for the
kingdom of heaven is at hand." This was the message of the King to His
people and the message of the King's herald as he called the King's
people to prepare for the King's coming.
Contemporary Situation:
In addition to love your God, and love one another, The Great
Commission was the last commandment that Jesus left us with.
Application: All of are called to evangelize in what ever way He has
gifted us. We should demonstrate our faith by bearing fruit for others to
see, and support each others ministries.
.
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| User: "Smiler" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
16 Jun 2007 09:53:17 PM |
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"No One" <N0_K019@shotmail.com> wrote in message
news:9OqdnXaoyOa-eO7bnZ2dnUVZ_vKunZ2d@giganews.com...
"St. Jackanapes" <larry_jackowskiNOSPAM@MAPSONhotmail.com> wrote in
message news:10tcfu.l5b.19.3@news.alt.net...
This the 1st in a series of Synthetic Studies of the New Testament.
. Matthew
General Impact
. Jesus Christ, the Savior of the world, is "the Son of Abraham", and
David, He qualifies as Israel's messianic King.
. Matthew uses a topical rather than a chronological arrangement of his
material in order to develop a crucial pattern in Christ's ministry.
. The works of the Lord are presented in a series of ten miracles.
. There is a series of reactions to Christ's words and works.
. Jesus communicates the significance of accepting or rejecting His offer
of righteousness.
. He also describes His second coming as the Judge and Lord of the
earth.
. Authenticating His words and works are the empty tomb, Resurrection,
and appearance, all proving that Jesus Christ is indeed the prophesied
Messiah, the very Son of God.
. Christ's final ministry in Judea reaches a climax at the cross as the
King
willingly gives up His life to redeem sinful persons. Jesus endures
awesome human hatred in this great demonstration of divine love. His
perfect sacrifice is acceptable, and this gospel concludes with His
glorious resurrection.
Atmosphere as a Whole
Matthew presents Jesus as Israel's messianic King, the long awaited
Messiah.
The Old Testament prophets predicted and longed for the coming of the
Anointed One who would enter history to bring redemption and
deliverance. The first verse of Matthew announces that long-awaited
event: "The book of the genealogy of Jesus Christ, the Son of David, the
Son of Abraham." Matthew provides the essential bridge between the
Old and New Testaments. Matthew documents Jesus Christ's claim to
be Messiah. Jesus possesses the credentials of Messiah, ministers in the
predicted pattern of Messiah, preaches messages only Messiah could
preach, and finally dies the death only Messiah could die.
Highlights
. The Presentation of the King (1:1-4:11)
. The Proclamation of the King (4:12-7:29)
. The Power of the King (8:1-11:1)
. The Progressive Rejection of the King (11:2-16:12)
. The Preparation of the King's Disciples (16:13-20:28)
. The Presentation and Rejection of the King (20:29-27:66)
. The Proof of the King (28:1-20)
Personal Application
Principle: Matthew wanted his readers to do what John the Baptist and
Jesus called the people of their day to do, namely "Repent, for the
kingdom of heaven is at hand." This was the message of the King to His
people and the message of the King's herald as he called the King's
people to prepare for the King's coming.
Contemporary Situation:
In addition to love your God, and love one another, The Great
Commission was the last commandment that Jesus left us with.
Application: All of are called to evangelize in what ever way He has
gifted us. We should demonstrate our faith by bearing fruit for others to
see, and support each others ministries.
IOW "We should be rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious by forcing our toxic
beliefs in other peoples faces when they've told us they don't want to
know".
Tried selling shoes to a person with no legs recently?
Gloves to a person with no arms?
Tried selling meat to a vegetarian?
Pork to a Jew or Muslim?
Beef to a Hindu?
Eggs to a vegan?
No? But you keep trying to sell your brand of religion to people who want no
part of your, or any, religion.
What's with you rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious people?
Smiler,
The godless one
.
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| User: "Irv Hyatt" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
16 Jun 2007 10:11:45 PM |
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"Smiler" <Smiler@Joe.King.com> wrote in message
news:xm1di.1012$aJ3.83@newsfe4-gui.ntli.net...
"No One" <N0_K019@shotmail.com> wrote in message
<CHOP CHOP>
IOW "We should be rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious by forcing our toxic
beliefs in other peoples faces when they've told us they don't want to
know".
Tried selling shoes to a person with no legs recently?
Gloves to a person with no arms?
Tried selling meat to a vegetarian?
Pork to a Jew or Muslim?
Beef to a Hindu?
Eggs to a vegan?
No? But you keep trying to sell your brand of religion to people who want
no part of your, or any, religion.
What's with you rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious people?
Nice list. Only orthodox Jews don't eat pork.
Vegans eat food that's still alive... looks gross.
let's force feed some xtians living food...
Smiler,
The godless one
.
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| User: "Smiler" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
16 Jun 2007 10:58:19 PM |
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"Irv Hyatt" <irvhyatt@ca.rr.com> wrote in message
news:4674a677$0$17108$4c368faf@roadrunner.com...
"Smiler" <Smiler@Joe.King.com> wrote in message
news:xm1di.1012$aJ3.83@newsfe4-gui.ntli.net...
"No One" <N0_K019@shotmail.com> wrote in message
<CHOP CHOP>
IOW "We should be rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious by forcing our toxic
beliefs in other peoples faces when they've told us they don't want to
know".
Tried selling shoes to a person with no legs recently?
Gloves to a person with no arms?
Tried selling meat to a vegetarian?
Pork to a Jew or Muslim?
Beef to a Hindu?
Eggs to a vegan?
No? But you keep trying to sell your brand of religion to people who want
no part of your, or any, religion.
What's with you rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious people?
Nice list. Only orthodox Jews don't eat pork.
Vegans eat food that's still alive... looks gross.
Vegans are people who don't eat anything that's come from a living animal.
Meat, eggs, milk and dairy produce. They're a 'stricter' sort of vegetarian.
I know a few of them.
Dunno where you got the idea of them 'only eating living things' from.
Vogons?
Smiler,
The godless one
.
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| User: "Enkidu" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
16 Jun 2007 11:04:48 PM |
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"Smiler" <Smiler@Joe.King.com> wrote in
news:vj2di.188$%Z3.161@newsfe3-gui.ntli.net:
"Irv Hyatt" <irvhyatt@ca.rr.com> wrote in message
news:4674a677$0$17108$4c368faf@roadrunner.com...
"Smiler" <Smiler@Joe.King.com> wrote in message
news:xm1di.1012$aJ3.83@newsfe4-gui.ntli.net...
"No One" <N0_K019@shotmail.com> wrote in message
<CHOP CHOP>
IOW "We should be rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious by forcing our
toxic beliefs in other peoples faces when they've told us they don't
want to know".
Tried selling shoes to a person with no legs recently?
Gloves to a person with no arms?
Tried selling meat to a vegetarian?
Pork to a Jew or Muslim?
Beef to a Hindu?
Eggs to a vegan?
No? But you keep trying to sell your brand of religion to people who
want no part of your, or any, religion.
What's with you rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious people?
Nice list. Only orthodox Jews don't eat pork.
Vegans eat food that's still alive... looks gross.
Vegans are people who don't eat anything that's come from a living
animal. Meat, eggs, milk and dairy produce. They're a 'stricter' sort
of vegetarian. I know a few of them.
Dunno where you got the idea of them 'only eating living things' from.
Vogons?
Vogons don't eat them, they smash them with iron mallets or sit on them.
--
Enkidu AA#2165
EAC Chaplain and ordained minister,
ULC, Modesto, CA
". . . believing in things that aren't true doesn't make you deep, it
just makes you wrong."
-The Atheist Barmaid
.
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| User: "Irv Hyatt" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
17 Jun 2007 12:11:25 AM |
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"Enkidu" <fox_rgfszx@trashmail.net> wrote in message
news:Xns9951D70111AC8255229@130.133.1.4...
"Smiler" <Smiler@Joe.King.com> wrote in
news:vj2di.188$%Z3.161@newsfe3-gui.ntli.net:
"Irv Hyatt" <irvhyatt@ca.rr.com> wrote in message
news:4674a677$0$17108$4c368faf@roadrunner.com...
"Smiler" <Smiler@Joe.King.com> wrote in message
news:xm1di.1012$aJ3.83@newsfe4-gui.ntli.net...
"No One" <N0_K019@shotmail.com> wrote in message
<CHOP CHOP>
IOW "We should be rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious by forcing our
toxic beliefs in other peoples faces when they've told us they don't
want to know".
Tried selling shoes to a person with no legs recently?
Gloves to a person with no arms?
Tried selling meat to a vegetarian?
Pork to a Jew or Muslim?
Beef to a Hindu?
Eggs to a vegan?
No? But you keep trying to sell your brand of religion to people who
want no part of your, or any, religion.
What's with you rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious people?
Nice list. Only orthodox Jews don't eat pork.
Vegans eat food that's still alive... looks gross.
Vegans are people who don't eat anything that's come from a living
animal. Meat, eggs, milk and dairy produce. They're a 'stricter' sort
of vegetarian. I know a few of them.
Dunno where you got the idea of them 'only eating living things' from.
Vogons?
Vogons don't eat them, they smash them with iron mallets or sit on them.
I think they get smashed and then sit down slowly on the handle of the iron
mallet.
--
Enkidu AA#2165
EAC Chaplain and ordained minister,
ULC, Modesto, CA
". . . believing in things that aren't true doesn't make you deep, it
just makes you wrong."
-The Atheist Barmaid
.
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| User: "Irv Hyatt" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
17 Jun 2007 12:10:32 AM |
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"Smiler" <Smiler@Joe.King.com> wrote in message
news:vj2di.188$%Z3.161@newsfe3-gui.ntli.net...
"Irv Hyatt" <irvhyatt@ca.rr.com> wrote in message
news:4674a677$0$17108$4c368faf@roadrunner.com...
"Smiler" <Smiler@Joe.King.com> wrote in message
news:xm1di.1012$aJ3.83@newsfe4-gui.ntli.net...
"No One" <N0_K019@shotmail.com> wrote in message
<CHOP CHOP>
IOW "We should be rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious by forcing our toxic
beliefs in other peoples faces when they've told us they don't want to
know".
Tried selling shoes to a person with no legs recently?
Gloves to a person with no arms?
Tried selling meat to a vegetarian?
Pork to a Jew or Muslim?
Beef to a Hindu?
Eggs to a vegan?
No? But you keep trying to sell your brand of religion to people who
want no part of your, or any, religion.
What's with you rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious people?
Nice list. Only orthodox Jews don't eat pork.
Vegans eat food that's still alive... looks gross.
Vegans are people who don't eat anything that's come from a living animal.
Meat, eggs, milk and dairy produce. They're a 'stricter' sort of
vegetarian.
I know a few of them.
Dunno where you got the idea of them 'only eating living things' from.
Vogons?
It's all kinds of living grains and other gross plant life mixed together
that looks like vomit.
I volunteered at a 'groovy' convention and lemme tell ya... these are some
weird folk.
Men floating around in white dresses playing handmade flutes with groovy
sandels eating bowls of stuff that looks like vomit mixed with diarhhea
<---- probably mispelled that one.
Smiler,
The godless one
.
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| User: "Velvet Elvis" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
16 Jun 2007 11:07:38 PM |
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On Sat, 16 Jun 2007 20:11:45 -0700, "Irv Hyatt" <irvhyatt@ca.rr.com> wrote:
"Smiler" <Smiler@Joe.King.com> wrote in message
news:xm1di.1012$aJ3.83@newsfe4-gui.ntli.net...
"No One" <N0_K019@shotmail.com> wrote in message
<CHOP CHOP>
IOW "We should be rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious by forcing our toxic
beliefs in other peoples faces when they've told us they don't want to
know".
Tried selling shoes to a person with no legs recently?
Gloves to a person with no arms?
Tried selling meat to a vegetarian?
Pork to a Jew or Muslim?
Beef to a Hindu?
Eggs to a vegan?
No? But you keep trying to sell your brand of religion to people who want
no part of your, or any, religion.
What's with you rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious people?
Nice list. Only orthodox Jews don't eat pork.
Vegans eat food that's still alive... looks gross.
let's force feed some xtians living food...
I'm a long-time vagitarian.
.
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| User: "Smiler" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
17 Jun 2007 06:58:13 PM |
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"Velvet Elvis" <nowhere@noplace.org> wrote in message
news:grc9731asf90gnukbpth17cjvb94frntou@4ax.com...
On Sat, 16 Jun 2007 20:11:45 -0700, "Irv Hyatt" <irvhyatt@ca.rr.com>
wrote:
"Smiler" <Smiler@Joe.King.com> wrote in message
news:xm1di.1012$aJ3.83@newsfe4-gui.ntli.net...
"No One" <N0_K019@shotmail.com> wrote in message
<CHOP CHOP>
IOW "We should be rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious by forcing our toxic
beliefs in other peoples faces when they've told us they don't want to
know".
Tried selling shoes to a person with no legs recently?
Gloves to a person with no arms?
Tried selling meat to a vegetarian?
Pork to a Jew or Muslim?
Beef to a Hindu?
Eggs to a vegan?
No? But you keep trying to sell your brand of religion to people who
want
no part of your, or any, religion.
What's with you rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious people?
Nice list. Only orthodox Jews don't eat pork.
Vegans eat food that's still alive... looks gross.
let's force feed some xtians living food...
I'm a long-time vagitarian.
Can you breathe through your ears?
Smiler,
The godless one
.
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| User: "Irv Hyatt" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
17 Jun 2007 12:12:53 AM |
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"Velvet Elvis" <nowhere@noplace.org> wrote in message
news:grc9731asf90gnukbpth17cjvb94frntou@4ax.com...
On Sat, 16 Jun 2007 20:11:45 -0700, "Irv Hyatt" <irvhyatt@ca.rr.com>
wrote:
"Smiler" <Smiler@Joe.King.com> wrote in message
news:xm1di.1012$aJ3.83@newsfe4-gui.ntli.net...
"No One" <N0_K019@shotmail.com> wrote in message
<CHOP CHOP>
IOW "We should be rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious by forcing our toxic
beliefs in other peoples faces when they've told us they don't want to
know".
Tried selling shoes to a person with no legs recently?
Gloves to a person with no arms?
Tried selling meat to a vegetarian?
Pork to a Jew or Muslim?
Beef to a Hindu?
Eggs to a vegan?
No? But you keep trying to sell your brand of religion to people who
want
no part of your, or any, religion.
What's with you rude, pig-ignorant and obnoxious people?
Nice list. Only orthodox Jews don't eat pork.
Vegans eat food that's still alive... looks gross.
let's force feed some xtians living food...
I'm a long-time vagitarian.
WOW! You'd turn down a big juicy spencer steak? or porterhouse?
You only live once. Lobster drowned in garlic butter?
.
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| User: "Velvet Elvis" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
17 Jun 2007 09:28:17 AM |
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On Sat, 16 Jun 2007 22:12:53 -0700, "Irv Hyatt" <irvhyatt@ca.rr.com> wrote:
"Velvet Elvis" <nowhere@noplace.org> wrote in message
news:grc9731asf90gnukbpth17cjvb94frntou@4ax.com...
On Sat, 16 Jun 2007 20:11:45 -0700, "Irv Hyatt" <irvhyatt@ca.rr.com>
wrote:
I'm a long-time vagitarian.
WOW! You'd turn down a big juicy spencer steak? or porterhouse?
You only live once. Lobster drowned in garlic butter?
You're confusing me with a vEegetarian.
.
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| User: "Irv Hyatt" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
17 Jun 2007 11:06:02 AM |
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"Velvet Elvis" <nowhere@noplace.org> wrote in message
news:96ha73hn8hutsavfjba6ippbt93eon8jbh@4ax.com...
On Sat, 16 Jun 2007 22:12:53 -0700, "Irv Hyatt" <irvhyatt@ca.rr.com>
wrote:
"Velvet Elvis" <nowhere@noplace.org> wrote in message
news:grc9731asf90gnukbpth17cjvb94frntou@4ax.com...
On Sat, 16 Jun 2007 20:11:45 -0700, "Irv Hyatt" <irvhyatt@ca.rr.com>
wrote:
I'm a long-time vagitarian.
WOW! You'd turn down a big juicy spencer steak? or porterhouse?
You only live once. Lobster drowned in garlic butter?
You're confusing me with a vEegetarian.
hahahahahahahahahahaha
that was a real tin roof, right over my head
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| User: "" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
16 Jun 2007 09:11:44 AM |
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On 16 jun, 15:01, St. Jackanapes
<larry_jackowskiNOS...@MAPSONhotmail.com> wrote:
In vegas.personals.swingers, Un Saved said...
"IF YOU WANT A NATION RULED BY RELIGON MOVE TO IRAN"
If you need Jesus toilet paper, just grab a bible and rip out a page
from the New Testament. Make sure to take a bible with you should you go
camping this summer. Wiping ***** from your ***** with the words of
Christ sure beats using a leaf. Since it's the Lord's paper, you know
that your finger won't poke a hole in it and get feces under your
fingernail. Be careful, though - Bible paper ain't Charmin, by any
stretch of the imagination. That's a pretty sensitive area to be getting
a paper cut!
--
St. Jackanapes ~ Bearer of The One True Liver ~
Ordained Minister & Holy Saint of The Universal Life Church
----------------------------------------------------------------------
WEBSITE:http://www.jackanapes.ws/| FORUM:http://www.voy.com/20630/
----------------------------------------------------------------------
THE A.F.J.C. MELTY AWARD FOR SPRING 2007:http://tinyurl.com/3db2bq/
"The ejaculate from satan has the consistency and smell of emesis."
- Andrew B. Chung, MD/PhD
Bad advice
Bad *****!
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| User: "john p" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
17 Jun 2007 12:39:20 AM |
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On Jun 16, 5:01 am, St. Jackanapes
<larry_jackowskiNOS...@MAPSONhotmail.com> wrote:
In vegas.personals.swingers, Un Saved said...
"IF YOU WANT A NATION RULED BY RELIGON MOVE TO IRAN"
If you need Jesus toilet paper, just grab a bible and rip out a page
from the New Testament. Make sure to take a bible with you should you go
camping this summer. Wiping ***** from your ***** with the words of
Christ sure beats using a leaf. Since it's the Lord's paper, you know
that your finger won't poke a hole in it and get feces under your
fingernail. Be careful, though - Bible paper ain't Charmin, by any
stretch of the imagination. That's a pretty sensitive area to be getting
a paper cut!
--
St. Jackanapes ~ Bearer of The One True Liver ~
Ordained Minister & Holy Saint of The Universal Life Church
----------------------------------------------------------------------
WEBSITE:http://www.jackanapes.ws/| FORUM:http://www.voy.com/20630/
----------------------------------------------------------------------
THE A.F.J.C. MELTY AWARD FOR SPRING 2007:http://tinyurl.com/3db2bq/
"The ejaculate from satan has the consistency and smell of emesis."
- Andrew B. Chung, MD/PhD
Watch out for holy pages in your holy bible.
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| User: "Brindal" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
16 Jun 2007 04:25:18 PM |
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On Jun 16, 8:01 am, St. Jackanapes
<larry_jackowskiNOS...@MAPSONhotmail.com> wrote:
In vegas.personals.swingers, Un Saved said...
"IF YOU WANT A NATION RULED BY RELIGON MOVE TO IRAN"
If you need Jesus toilet paper, just grab a bible and rip out a page
from the New Testament. Make sure to take a bible with you should you go
camping this summer. Wiping ***** from your ***** with the words of
Christ sure beats using a leaf.
Bad idea! Wrong kind of paper to throw down a toilet!
Why screw up a plumbing system by making a statement?
Brindal
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| User: "ur_droll" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
16 Jun 2007 06:53:07 PM |
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On Jun 17, 9:25 am, Brindal <Brinda...@gmail.com> wrote:
On Jun 16, 8:01 am, St. Jackanapes
<larry_jackowskiNOS...@MAPSONhotmail.com> wrote:
In vegas.personals.swingers, Un Saved said...
"IF YOU WANT A NATION RULED BY RELIGON MOVE TO IRAN"
If you need Jesus toilet paper, just grab a bible and rip out a page
from the New Testament. Make sure to take a bible with you should you go
camping this summer. Wiping ***** from your ***** with the words of
Christ sure beats using a leaf.
Bad idea! Wrong kind of paper to throw down a toilet!
Why screw up a plumbing system by making a statement?
Brindal
When we can rely on you to lick our arseholes clean
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| User: "Brindal" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
17 Jun 2007 11:04:53 AM |
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On Jun 16, 6:53 pm, ur_droll <C...@xtra.co.nz> wrote:
If you need Jesus toilet paper, just grab a bible and rip out a page
from the New Testament. Make sure to take a bible with you should you go
camping this summer. Wiping ***** from your ***** with the words of
Christ sure beats using a leaf.
Bad idea! Wrong kind of paper to throw down a toilet!
Why screw up a plumbing system by making a statement?
Brindal
When we can rely on you to lick our arseholes clean-
In your dreams.
Brindal
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| User: "Father Haskell" |
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| Title: Re: ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN BUY JESUS TOILET PAPER? |
16 Jun 2007 11:02:38 AM |
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On Jun 16, 9:01 am, St. Jackanapes
<larry_jackowskiNOS...@MAPSONhotmail.com> wrote:
In vegas.personals.swingers, Un Saved said...
"IF YOU WANT A NATION RULED BY RELIGON MOVE TO IRAN"
If you need Jesus toilet paper, just grab a bible and rip out a page
from the New Testament. Make sure to take a bible with you should you go
camping this summer. Wiping ***** from your ***** with the words of
Christ sure beats using a leaf. Since it's the Lord's paper, you know
that your finger won't poke a hole in it and get feces under your
fingernail.
Rip out two pages. Voila! Double ply.
Be careful, though - Bible paper ain't Charmin, by any
stretch of the imagination. That's a pretty sensitive area to be getting
a paper cut!
Bah. Our rustic pioneer ancestors used the Sears catalogue, and not
once did they complain about paper cuts.
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