Not too long ago, back when the "Narnia" movie was released,
something started bothering me.

And it's not so much that someone could turn the bible into a full blown
fairy tale without the fundies grasping the irony in that. Oh no. It's that
you have to do it so blatantly -- and even then have every talking head
in the world point it out to them first -- before they can see "God" in a
film.

True to fundy form, "God" goes completely unnoticed in countless
films... none of them disrespectful, most qualifying as a celebration of
faith even, yet the few that get noticed at all win disapproval from the
bible humpers...errr..."thumpers."

One example that springs to mind is "Latter Days."

But that's rather overt. It's too easy.

Most "God" characters in movies -- and there are more than most
people think -- can be easily defined. Generally speaking, they
don't play a major part in events. "God" is present, ever seeing,
ever knowing, but plays no active role in events. This is just like the
traditional Christian view of God, always with us but (because of
"free will") leaves us to our own means.

More easily spotted is the purely Christian "Jesus" figure. He (sometimes
she) reveals themselves by dying, followed by their death leading to some
sort of resolution, or transformation.

A truly classic case of a "Jesus" character, one which the bible humpers
would be outraged at, was a lesbian movie whose title escapes me
right now.

In that film there was some blond guy, with long hair (for those who
need it spelled out for them), in a typically small role, whose death
lead to a long overdue transformation in the star's life... not to mention
a young homo coming out of the closet.

Wait. This wasn't meant to be an essay on religious metaphors. That
wasn't my point at all.

My point is that in the vast majority of cases the bible thumpers can't
see their own "God" even when he's practically leaping out of the
screen. What's more, if they were capable of spotting their own "God"
being depicted in films, quite often they would be offended. Yes.
Deeply offended.

Yet, they cheer on "Narnia," which if anything makes a mockery
out of their faith. Well, it certainly does turn it into a fairy tale... or
a more entertaining one at least.

It makes me wonder. If the Christians are 100% right, and Jesus
returned soon, would they be able to spot him without a huge,
screaming orange neon sign identifying him as Jesus? And could
even that be enough, without him also validating their every last
prejudice first?