"August Pamplona" <necatoramericanusancylostomaduodenale@mail.com>

message news:WYCYa.710$Nf3.416@newsread4.news.pas.earthlink.net...

"juliekale" <me[spammenot]@juliekale.com> wrote in message
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<snip>

Having started life as a shy male (I've mostly gotten over it,
fortunately) I am quite aware of this fact. It's the same with
shy guys as with shy girls. Thanks for pointing it out, though.

So...do shy guys like it when girls ask them out? Or does it scare

them

away?
What's the proper way to approach somebody who's shy?
I ask because long, long ago, when I was studying at the esteemed

community

college, there was this beautifuly shy creature that I simply

But I

Let me put it this way, if you do nothing, you'll get nothing in
return. Yes, it's entirely possible that your approach will "scare"

away. It is also almost certain, in the case of a really shy person,
that he's not going to ask you out... ever. On the other hand, it is
quite possible that he might simply be too stupid (socially

know any better when it comes to his response to your approach. If

is the case, realize it's probably not you. I imagine trying again

different approaches (including being brutally direct, as Martin

suggests) might be an option. And, of course, I'm not in any way
suggesting that you should become a stalker or not take no for an
answer. I'm just saying that some (this would be me) are not always
going to know how to properly respond to hints which would be

well understood by someone who might be a little bit more

Hmmm...well, I have just met a shy one a few weeks ago. We'll see what
happens. :)

being shy myself, never could muster up the courage to say

Ah,

Ah, that changes everything. If both are very shy, then you're
fucked. I'm not saying that you won't be compatible or anything like
that (the opposite is probably the case). I'm just saying that
potentially you'll both be sitting, in absolute silence, looking at

other averting gazes every time any of you gets even close to making

contact and end up doing nothing about it (which might be exactly

happened).

YEAH that's what happened! LOL.

<snip>

To show you how pathetic I can be, how sometimes you just can't

and how in that event, it's probably not your fault at all, I shall
quote myself from a post I made elsewhere:

-----------------------------------------------------
My first RPG was some sort of Star Trek based RPG during my

second year in college (a nearby community college that I attended

two years). As I had no real concept of what a RPG is and since I

spent any real amount of time getting acquainted with what the rules

like, I really didn't have any idea regarding what was actually

on. This made for an excruciatingly boring experience.

As it turns out, the experience could have been much more
interesting because one of the game participants, who was sitting
directly opposite to me, was a gal who I happened to find attractive

some reason (there was also another girl sitting far away who seemed

derive a great deal of joy in proffering numerous

charming in it's own way). I made a mental note of some odd body
language features about her (how she would stand up and jut out her
breasts in my general direction --though I probably just assumed she

some sort of muscular imbalance or something). Eventually, during

game, she started rubbing her foot against my legs*. Unfortunately,

had never been in such a social situation before, I had absolutely

idea what the appropriate response was and thus a situation that
started out as excruciatingly boring but which should have become

much less boring (perhaps even interesting --regardless of my lack

interest in the stupid role-playing game) instead remained
excruciatingly boring and even became highly stressful and anxiety
inducing (not to mention the fact that the aforementioned girl

must have thought, after this, that there was something seriously

with me** --I suppose, in a very real sense, there is).

Heh! This particular individual used to say things to me in a really,
really, really low voice, and I'd always have to go "WHAT?" And with a
terminally shaky voice, he'd repeat himself just a little louder.

he worked up the courage to actually attempt conversation with me but

never look in my eyes. I was too big a chicken to ask him or even

that I might like him...cause believe it or not...I wasn't sure! LOL.

looking back, it's very clear how shy he was.
He used to do some very strange things. Like if I was talking with

student, he'd walk Right Behind Us, so he could hear my conversations.

don't know how he figured I wouldn't notice, but it only happened when

with another person. Esp. with a man. Any other time, he'd keep his
distance.

After much meditation on the subject, years later I concluded

the appropriate response would have been reciprocation (like,

I also had the revelation, as of this very moment, that some other
sort of parallel silent acknowledgment of her attention might have

in order as well (involving gaze, smiling and that sort of thing)

that's only because I'm reading a book on the subject of non-verbal
communication.

Did she ever do anything like that?

* I suppose a possibility exists, which I'd much rather discard,

instead of belonging to the girl I found attractive, the foot

belonged to the very obese and very much male DM; but I didn't

him looking at me kind of funny (if anything, he should have been

busy with the whole doing the DM thing) so that was probably not the
case***.
** Or worse, thought that she did something wrong.
*** Then again, at this point I may not have been able to notice

of anything. But, actually, if he was gay and secretly lusting for

it's news to me (I guess I'm just trying to be funny by considering

posibility in these stupid notes --because there is a significant

of humor to be found in such a possibility).

I'd say sense you can't know for sure (cause you were too shy to

assume to the good! :)

--
Be as you are.

From alt.atheism only...Julie Kale (aa 1029)
www.juliekale.com

Julie Kale wrote:
So...do shy guys like it when girls ask them out? Or does it scare them
away?
What's the proper way to approach somebody who's shy?
I ask because long, long ago, when I was studying at the esteemed

college, there was this beautifuly shy creature that I simply adored. But

being shy myself, never could muster up the courage to say anything. Ah,
what might have been....

skypher replies:
Have a friend go tell them or write them a note.

On Thu, 07 Aug 2003 20:53:51 GMT, "juliekale"
<me[spammenot]@juliekale.com> posted in alt.atheism:

So...do shy guys like it when girls ask them out? Or does it scare them
away?

Yes.

(Not being a smartass - it depends on the guy.)

What's the proper way to approach somebody who's shy?

The same way you approach someone who isn't. Nicely.

I ask because long, long ago, when I was studying at the esteemed

college, there was this beautifuly shy creature that I simply adored. But

being shy myself, never could muster up the courage to say anything. Ah,
what might have been....

If you ask him and he rejects you, you end up with nothing. If you
don't ask, you end up with ...?