Silver rings a reminder of teens' pledge to purity
The Associated Press
May 27, 2005

TOLEDO, Ohio - When Katie Chromik put a silver ring on her finger and
promised at church to stay away from sex until marriage, her junior
high friends giggled.

"Some people have made bets on me that I'm not going to make it," she
said. "It just makes me more determined."

Pledging to purity may still draw snickers, but it's also gaining
acceptance among teens, especially those who attend Christian schools
and churches.

The silver rings aren't as trendy or flashy as the bright yellow
"Livestrong" rubber bracelets popularized by Lance Armstrong. The
rings are a subtle statement of a commitment to faith and virtue.

Teens say they're standing up to a constant barrage of sex-related
messages.

"It comes at you in every direction," said Kayla Ballmer, an
eighth-grader at Toledo Christian School. "Movies, TV, radio,
magazines. Even on clothing."

The movement is driven by Christian educators and faith-based groups
promoting abstinence education.

The Silver Ring Thing, backed by $1.2 million in federal grants since
2003, has expanded its reach in the U.S. and internationally. It has
grown most in South Africa where workers go into schools to teach
abstinence.

A year ago, founder Denny Pattyn took his message to England and
Scotland. Next up is a DVD-based program designed to reach an even
bigger audience.

The organization, based in suburban Pittsburgh, puts on road shows at
churches nationwide that include "Saturday Night Live" style skits,
music videos and a message of abstinence. Young people are given a
silver ring and decide whether they want to pledge to abstain from
sex.

Three out of four wear the ring, Pattyn said.

Critics say the message is too focused on abstinence. They say it's a
difficult thing to maintain and that once the promise is broken, it
can lead to unprotected sex and a higher risk of disease.

"The question is are they doing more damage than good?" said Deb
Hauser, vice president of Advocates for Youth, a group that promotes
education about birth control and condom use.

The abstinence-only groups, she said, teach young people that condoms
fail more often than they really do, which causes teens not to plan
for a time when they do break their pledge.

"It wipes out all the benefits of the pledge," Hauser said.

But Pattyn contends that the safe sex message taught in schools hasn't
worked. Young people ages 15 to 24 account for about half the new
cases of sexually transmitted diseases in the U.S. each year.

How the Silver Ring Thing program gets its funding is also coming
under question.

The American Civil Liberties Union filed a lawsuit May 16 that accused
the federal government of improperly using taxpayer money to fund
Christian religious activities in the program.

The Bush administration has increased funding for abstinence education
and emphasizes abstinence over condoms as the primary way to stop the
transmission of HIV and sexually-transmitted diseases.

The silver ring movement began in 1994 through the Southern Baptist
Convention's publishing house, Lifeway Christian Resources in
Nashville, Tenn.

It's True Love Waits program has reached an estimated 3 million teens,
said spokeswoman Kristi Cherry. Ring sales have grown by 10 percent to
15 percent over each of the last three years.

There's no standard silver ring. Some are engraved with scripture or
phrases such as "True Love Waits" or "Faith." Some are enhanced with a
diamond or a cross.

They can be worn on any finger or even a thumb. Teens also can declare
their intention via wrist bands, bracelets, pins, watches and
T-shirts.

Gina Layman, owner of Reger's Religious Bookstore in Toledo, stopped
selling the rings a few years ago because nobody wanted them. She has
brought them back.

"Now it's a cool thing," she said. "It's mostly the parents buying for
their kids."

Chromik, an eighth-grader at Washington Junior High School in Toledo,
said the ring helps her remember her promise to God and her parents.

"Every time I'm with my boyfriend, I look at that ring and it just
reminds me I'm going to be pure," she said.

Mothers and fathers slid the rings onto the fingers of 13 teens during
a ceremony at Mayfair Plymouth Congregational Christian Church after a
weekend retreat in January where they talked about sexual purity.

"They've really embraced it. I hear so many stories from the kids.
They all seem to know someone who's gotten pregnant. It disheartens
them," said youth minister Craig Marsee.

"Every time they make a fist or move their fingers, it's a reminder of
the commitment they made," he said.

Mike Ballmer, whose daughter, Kayla, took part in the ceremony, said
she took her decision very seriously. "I don't want to say it's a
fad," he said. "Maybe it's something the youth are finally starting to
see."

Yet pledging to purity isn't easy, teens say.

Boys are less likely to wear the rings even if they make the pledge,
said Ron Rightnowar, spiritual life director at Toledo Christian.

Even some girls decide not to wear them so they don't face any
questions or teasing, Kayla Ballmer said. "That kind of defeats the
purpose," she said.

Still, silver ring sales are strong.

Jerry Rady, a jeweler in Escondido, Calif., sells about 3,500 purity
rings a year, which accounts for nearly all of his business.

He made the first ring carved with the words "True Love Waits" in
1994. "It just took over the business," Rady said.

Rady's sterling silver rings sell for $35 while the solid gold
versions are priced at $245. The rings are popular all over,
especially in the Bible Belt states of Texas and Florida.

"It's part of the whole Christian movement," Rady said. "It's more
vocal than it used to be. They don't feel like they have to hide it.

"It wouldn't have worked when I was a teenager I can tell you that."

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On the Net:

True Love Waits: http://www.lifeway.com/tlw/

Silver Ring Thing: http://www.silverringthing.com

JR Design Jewelry: http://www.scripturejewelry.com/