What are the wisest words ever?



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Topic: Religions > Atheism
User: "Iain"
Date: 13 Jan 2005 11:07:22 AM
Object: What are the wisest words ever?
What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".
Any contenders?
~Iain
.

User: "Therion Ware"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 11:19:02 AM
On 13 Jan 2005 09:07:22 -0800 in alt.atheism, Iain ("Iain"
<iain_inkster@hotmail.com>) said, directing the reply to alt.atheism


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?

Snigger.
"I am that which I might become".
Failing that, "ah, opps" might do.
--
"Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You."
- Attrib: Pauline Reage.
Inexpensive VHS & other video to CD/DVD conversion?
See: www.Video2CD.com. 35.00 gets your video on DVD.
Market Your DVD to The World For Almost Nothing: www.instantdvd.tv
** atheist poster child #1 ** #442.
.
User: "Iain"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 16 Jan 2005 03:07:51 PM
Elaborate.
~Iain
.
User: "Eris"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 16 Jan 2005 03:23:23 PM
On 16 Jan 2005 13:07:51 -0800, "Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com>
wrote:

Elaborate.

~Iain

I probably read this here,but I am not sure.
"No matter how beautiful she is, someone is sick of her"
We got divorced.
.


User: "Daniel Kolle"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 06:30:06 PM
On Thu, 13 Jan 2005 17:19:02 +0000, Therion Ware
<autodelete@city-of-dis.com> thought hard and said:



On 13 Jan 2005 09:07:22 -0800 in alt.atheism, Iain ("Iain"
<iain_inkster@hotmail.com>) said, directing the reply to alt.atheism




What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?


Snigger.

PC alert! PC ALERT!

"I am that which I might become".

Failing that, "ah, opps" might do.

--
-Daniel "Mr. Brevity" Kolle; 16 A.A. #2035
Koji Kondo, Yo-Yo Ma, Gustav Mahler, Krzysztof Penderecki, and Geirr Tveitt are my Gods.
Head of EAC Denial Department and Madly Insane Scientist.
.
User: "El Rayo-X"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 14 Jan 2005 10:32:22 AM
On Thu, 13 Jan 2005 18:30:06 -0600, Daniel Kolle <DKolle@hotmail.com>
wrote:

On Thu, 13 Jan 2005 17:19:02 +0000, Therion Ware
<autodelete@city-of-dis.com> thought hard and said:



On 13 Jan 2005 09:07:22 -0800 in alt.atheism, Iain ("Iain"
<iain_inkster@hotmail.com>) said, directing the reply to alt.atheism




What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?


Snigger.


PC alert! PC ALERT!

Who you callin' enigma?!


"I am that which I might become".

Failing that, "ah, opps" might do.


--
-Daniel "Mr. Brevity" Kolle; 16 A.A. #2035
Koji Kondo, Yo-Yo Ma, Gustav Mahler, Krzysztof Penderecki, and Geirr Tveitt are my Gods.
Head of EAC Denial Department and Madly Insane Scientist.

.



User: "Gary Bohn"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 03:48:49 PM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com:

What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever
heard or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will
make you float".

Any contenders?

~Iain

No matter where you go, there you are.
--
apatriot #23, aa #1779, Grand Poobah (Pubbah)(Hell! head honcho), EAC
Department of Oxygen Deprivation
Responsible for brain damage everywhere!
Gary Bohn
.

User: "Doc Smartass"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 10:18:29 PM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com:


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

"Diplomacy is that fine art of saying ‘Nice doggy’ while you’re looking for
a bigger stick." -- Churchill.
--
Dr. Smartass -- BAAWA Knight of Heckling -- a.a. #1939
Hurl, hurl, door gong's oil hair!
Wart inhale dough way cur?
Wart inhale dough way cur?
Hurl, hurl, door gong's oil hair!
Wart inhale dough way cur, nor?
.

User: "Doc Smartass"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 10:15:18 PM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com:


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

"If you don't understand it, don't ***** with it."
--
Dr. Smartass -- BAAWA Knight of Heckling -- a.a. #1939
Hurl, hurl, door gong's oil hair!
Wart inhale dough way cur?
Wart inhale dough way cur?
Hurl, hurl, door gong's oil hair!
Wart inhale dough way cur, nor?
.

User: "Clayton Brand Ewok Skin Bedroom Slippers"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 06:48:15 PM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?

"Faith doesn't move mountains....it levels skyscrapers!"
"A chain is only as strong as it's weakest link"
...and my personal philosophy, which helps me deal with the Jerry Lewis movie
that is my life...
"***** happens...accept it and move on!"
.
User: "Rev. Karl E. Taylor"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 06:57:11 PM
Clayton Brand Ewok Skin Bedroom Slippers wrote:

"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...

What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?



"Faith doesn't move mountains....it levels skyscrapers!"

"A chain is only as strong as it's weakest link"

..and my personal philosophy, which helps me deal with the Jerry Lewis movie
that is my life...

"***** happens...accept it and move on!"



From David Lee Roth:
"Don't sweat the little *****."
"Everything is little *****."
--
There are none more ignorant and useless,
than they that seek answers on their knees,
with their eyes closed.
____________________________________________________________________
Rev. Karl E. Taylor

A.A #1143 PLONKED by Bob
Apostle of Dr. Lao EAC: Virgin Conversion Unit Director
____________________________________________________________________
.
User: "Doc Smartass"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 10:32:10 PM
"Rev. Karl E. Taylor" <ktayloraz@getnet.net> wrote in
news:r2ijb2-eqt1.ln1@dhcpdns2.ddsoho.com:

Clayton Brand Ewok Skin Bedroom Slippers wrote:

"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...

What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever
heard or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will
make you float".

Any contenders?



"Faith doesn't move mountains....it levels skyscrapers!"

"A chain is only as strong as it's weakest link"

..and my personal philosophy, which helps me deal with the Jerry
Lewis movie that is my life...

"***** happens...accept it and move on!"



From David Lee Roth:

"Don't sweat the little *****."
"Everything is little *****."

There's also:
Don't sweat the petty things; pet the sweaty things!
--
Dr. Smartass -- BAAWA Knight of Heckling -- a.a. #1939
Hurl, hurl, door gong's oil hair!
Wart inhale dough way cur?
Wart inhale dough way cur?
Hurl, hurl, door gong's oil hair!
Wart inhale dough way cur, nor?
.

User: "chibiabos"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 07:41:35 PM
In article <r2ijb2-eqt1.ln1@dhcpdns2.ddsoho.com>, Rev. Karl E. Taylor
<ktayloraz@getnet.net> wrote:

Clayton Brand Ewok Skin Bedroom Slippers wrote:

"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...

What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?



"Faith doesn't move mountains....it levels skyscrapers!"

"A chain is only as strong as it's weakest link"

..and my personal philosophy, which helps me deal with the Jerry Lewis movie
that is my life...

"***** happens...accept it and move on!"



From David Lee Roth:

"Don't sweat the little *****."
"Everything is little *****."

That's not Roth's. That's mine.
-chib
--
Member of S.M.A.S.H.
Sarcastic Middle-aged Atheists with a Sense of Humor
.
User: "Rev. Karl E. Taylor"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 08:02:22 PM
chibiabos wrote:

In article <r2ijb2-eqt1.ln1@dhcpdns2.ddsoho.com>, Rev. Karl E. Taylor
<

> wrote:


Clayton Brand Ewok Skin Bedroom Slippers wrote:

"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?



"Faith doesn't move mountains....it levels skyscrapers!"

"A chain is only as strong as it's weakest link"

..and my personal philosophy, which helps me deal with the Jerry Lewis movie
that is my life...

"***** happens...accept it and move on!"




From David Lee Roth:

"Don't sweat the little *****."
"Everything is little *****."



That's not Roth's. That's mine.

-chib

Saw it on a VH1 special, many, MANY years ago, back when I used to watch
that thing called TV.
Now, it's a stupid box, programed by stupid people, and censored by
brain dead morons. I don't even trust the time it displays any longer.
Any way, that's where I first heard it. Must be almost 12 years ago now.
--
There are none more ignorant and useless,
than they that seek answers on their knees,
with their eyes closed.
____________________________________________________________________
Rev. Karl E. Taylor

A.A #1143 PLONKED by Bob
Apostle of Dr. Lao EAC: Virgin Conversion Unit Director
____________________________________________________________________
.




User: "Clayton Brand Ewok Skin Bedroom Slippers"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 06:49:06 PM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?

"I like boobies...do you?"
.

User: "Clayton Brand Ewok Skin Bedroom Slippers"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 06:45:03 PM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?

"Never stick your penis in an electric pencil sharpener!!! The hole is too
small, the effort is pointless and the results are painful and damaging!!!!"
That can be applied to all sorts of situations!
.

User: "Clayton Brand Ewok Skin Bedroom Slippers"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 07:10:13 PM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

"Religion is the result of the laxitive of ignorance!"
"If you can't lick em, join em...or give up being a lesbian!"
"I may not cheat, but I'm not above amending the mistakes of fortune!"
"Never compare fruit to a fruitbat!"
"I'm far from perfect but my imperfection is spectacular"
"Just because I talk *****, doesn't mean I eat it!"
"I'd rather have ***** for breakfast than ***** for brains!"
"The only thing that doesn't fade between adolescence and adulthood are the
tattoos and the neurosise!"
"It's deja poo.....being in the same ***** again!"
"I'm a madman who just happens not to be mad!"...Salvatore Dali
.
User: "Doc Smartass"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 10:35:19 PM
"Clayton Brand Ewok Skin Bedroom Slippers"
<cjfat@SPAMBLOCKphonymail.com> wrote in
news:41e71b11$0$24458$afc38c87@news.optusnet.com.au:


"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever
heard or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will
make you float".



"Religion is the result of the laxitive of ignorance!"

"If you can't lick em, join em...or give up being a lesbian!"

"I may not cheat, but I'm not above amending the mistakes of fortune!"

"Never compare fruit to a fruitbat!"

"I'm far from perfect but my imperfection is spectacular"

"Just because I talk *****, doesn't mean I eat it!"

"I'd rather have ***** for breakfast than ***** for brains!"

"The only thing that doesn't fade between adolescence and adulthood
are the tattoos and the neurosise!"

"It's deja poo.....being in the same ***** again!"

"I'm a madman who just happens not to be mad!"...Salvatore Dali

"I don't do drugs. I AM drugs." -- Salvador Dali
--
Dr. Smartass -- BAAWA Knight of Heckling -- a.a. #1939
Hurl, hurl, door gong's oil hair!
Wart inhale dough way cur?
Wart inhale dough way cur?
Hurl, hurl, door gong's oil hair!
Wart inhale dough way cur, nor?
.


User: "Claytibardfarst"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 16 Jan 2005 01:03:07 AM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...
Drink like you're 17, work like you don't need the money, love like you've
never been hurt, dance like no one is watching, sing like you're in the
shower and ***** like you're being filmed!!!
.

User: "David Francis"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 06:38:54 PM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?

~Iain

"Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages."
Pratchett
.

User: "kathryn"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 02:07:45 PM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?

~Iain

"Everyone is someone else's weirdo"
.

User: "Robibnikoff"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 11:15:26 AM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?

"It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye".
--
---------
Robyn
Resident Witchypoo
#1557
.
User: "Clayton Brand Ewok Skin Bedroom Slippers"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 06:46:00 PM
"Robibnikoff" <witchypoo@broomstick.com> wrote in message
news:34nolfF47kqnbU1@individual.net...


"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?


"It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye".

"It's all eyes and lips until someone makes a game of it!"
.

User: "Little Me"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 01:02:00 PM

"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?


"It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye".
--

LMAO!!! hehehehe
How about . . . .
"DO YOU WANT ME TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO CRY ABOUT?!"
.
User: "stoney"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 17 Jan 2005 05:14:29 PM
On Thu, 13 Jan 2005 19:02:00 GMT, "Little Me"
<soul.lover@ntlworld.com> wrote:


"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?


"It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye".
--



LMAO!!! hehehehe

How about . . . .


"DO YOU WANT ME TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO CRY ABOUT?!"

A raincoated bum opens his raincoat.....
--
Contempt of Congress meter reading-offscale.
Hello, theocracy with a fundamentalist US Supreme
Court who will ensure church and state are joined
at the hip like clergy and altar boys.
America 1776-Jan 2001 RIP
.


User: "El Rayo-X"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 14 Jan 2005 10:31:29 AM
On Thu, 13 Jan 2005 12:15:26 -0500, "Robibnikoff"
<witchypoo@broomstick.com> wrote:


"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?


"It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye".

My mother used to tell us kids, "If you break your leg doing that,
don't come running to me."

--
---------
Robyn
Resident Witchypoo
#1557


.

User: ""

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 01:36:43 PM
Robibnikoff wrote:

"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1105636042.782209.131900@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever

heard

or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make

you

float".

Any contenders?


"It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye".

"...and then the game's over, and you've won."
Walt Smith
Firelock on DALNet
.


User: "Enkidu"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 14 Jan 2005 10:11:03 PM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in news:1105636042.782209.131900
@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com:


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

"Watch out where the huskies go, and don’t you eat that yellow snow."
Frank Zappa
--
Enkidu AA# 2165
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?
Then he is not omnipotent.
Is he able, but not willing?
Then he is malevolent.
Is he both able and willing?
Then where does evil come from?
Is he neither able nor willing?
Then why call him God?
Epicurus 341-270 B.C.E.
.
User: "sanguinevikings"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 15 Jan 2005 03:39:32 PM
Enkidu wrote:

"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote in news:1105636042.782209.131900
@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com:


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".



"Watch out where the huskies go, and don’t you eat that yellow snow."

Frank Zappa

Dont you just love ol' Frank:
"There's an old rugged cross
In the land of cutton --
It's still burnin' on somebody's lawn
And it still smells rotten "
From 'Jesus thinks you're a jerk'.
.


User: "Mike Smith"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 13 Jan 2005 10:33:02 PM
"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote:


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?

"Don't step in anything soft."
__________________________________________
ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ
Mike Smith | aa #1164 | Founder of SMASH
__________________________________________
ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ
"Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth."
- Psalms 58:6
.
User: "Clayton Brand Ewok Skin Bedroom Slippers"

Title: Re: What are the wisest words ever? 14 Jan 2005 01:54:20 AM
"Mike Smith" <mikesmith@godisdead.com> wrote in message
news:erieu0t2ebu3jvagl96qjurggpa33elq71@4ax.com...

"Iain" <iain_inkster@hotmail.com> wrote:


What, to illustrate secular wisdom, are the wisest words you ever heard
or read outside a holy book? My favourite is "Not farting will make you
float".

Any contenders?


"Don't step in anything soft."

Never eat anything bigger than your own head!
.



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