Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if...



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Topic: Religions > Atheism
User: "stoney"
Date: 27 Aug 2007 07:40:10 PM
Object: Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if...
http://bitsandpieces1.blogspot.com/2007/08/your-starship-captain-just-might-be.html
Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if...
Monday, August 27, 2007
* your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month
* he paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles
* you have a shuttle called "Billy Joe Bob"
* he refers to Klingons as "Critters"
* he refers to Photon Torpedoes as "Popguns"
* he has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum
foil
* he installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the saucer section
* he says "Got your ears on, good buddy" instead of "open hailing
frequencies"
* he hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen
* he rewires his communicator into his belt buckle
* he keeps a six-pack under his command chair and a gun rack above it
* he says "Yee-Ha!" instead of "Engage"
* he has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser
* he insists on calling his executive officer "Bubba"
* he sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of "Bassmaster"
* he programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens
* he paints the starship John Deere green
* he refers to a Pulsar as a "Blue Light Special"
* he refers to the Mutara Nebula as a "swamp"
* his moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale
* he sings "Lucille" instead of "Kathleen"
* his idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls
* he wears mirrored shades on the Bridge
* his idea of a "gas giant" is that big ol' XO Bubba after a meal of
beans and weenies
* he sets phaser to "Cajun"
.

User: "Ron Baker, Pluralitas!"

Title: Re: Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if... 27 Aug 2007 08:36:50 PM
"stoney" <stoney@the.net> wrote in message
news:rjr6d3td46gqsb4r4tb01ac0o50o4lj0ma@4ax.com...

http://bitsandpieces1.blogspot.com/2007/08/your-starship-captain-just-might-be.html

Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if...

Monday, August 27, 2007

* your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month
* he paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles
* you have a shuttle called "Billy Joe Bob"
* he refers to Klingons as "Critters"
* he refers to Photon Torpedoes as "Popguns"
* he has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum
foil
* he installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the saucer section
* he says "Got your ears on, good buddy" instead of "open hailing
frequencies"
* he hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen
* he rewires his communicator into his belt buckle
* he keeps a six-pack under his command chair and a gun rack above it
* he says "Yee-Ha!" instead of "Engage"
* he has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser
* he insists on calling his executive officer "Bubba"
* he sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of "Bassmaster"
* he programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens
* he paints the starship John Deere green
* he refers to a Pulsar as a "Blue Light Special"
* he refers to the Mutara Nebula as a "swamp"
* his moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale
* he sings "Lucille" instead of "Kathleen"
* his idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls
* he wears mirrored shades on the Bridge
* his idea of a "gas giant" is that big ol' XO Bubba after a meal of
beans and weenies
* he sets phaser to "Cajun"

:)
.

User: "Syd M."

Title: Re: Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if... 28 Aug 2007 03:59:00 PM
On Aug 27, 8:40 pm, stoney <sto...@the.net> wrote:

http://bitsandpieces1.blogspot.com/2007/08/your-starship-captain-just...

Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if...

Monday, August 27, 2007

* your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month
* he paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles
* you have a shuttle called "Billy Joe Bob"
* he refers to Klingons as "Critters"
* he refers to Photon Torpedoes as "Popguns"
* he has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum
foil
* he installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the saucer section
* he says "Got your ears on, good buddy" instead of "open hailing
frequencies"
* he hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen
* he rewires his communicator into his belt buckle
* he keeps a six-pack under his command chair and a gun rack above it
* he says "Yee-Ha!" instead of "Engage"
* he has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser
* he insists on calling his executive officer "Bubba"
* he sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of "Bassmaster"
* he programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens
* he paints the starship John Deere green
* he refers to a Pulsar as a "Blue Light Special"
* he refers to the Mutara Nebula as a "swamp"
* his moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale
* he sings "Lucille" instead of "Kathleen"
* his idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls
* he wears mirrored shades on the Bridge
* his idea of a "gas giant" is that big ol' XO Bubba after a meal of
beans and weenies
* he sets phaser to "Cajun"

LOL!!
PDW
.

User: "Doc Smartass"

Title: Re: Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if... 28 Aug 2007 10:58:32 PM
stoney <stoney@the.net> wrote in
news:rjr6d3td46gqsb4r4tb01ac0o50o4lj0ma@4ax.com:

http://bitsandpieces1.blogspot.com/2007/08/your-starship-captain-just-m
ight-be.html

Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if...

Monday, August 27, 2007

* your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month
* he paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles
* you have a shuttle called "Billy Joe Bob"
* he refers to Klingons as "Critters"
* he refers to Photon Torpedoes as "Popguns"
* he has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum
foil
* he installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the saucer section
* he says "Got your ears on, good buddy" instead of "open hailing
frequencies"
* he hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen
* he rewires his communicator into his belt buckle
* he keeps a six-pack under his command chair and a gun rack above it
* he says "Yee-Ha!" instead of "Engage"
* he has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser
* he insists on calling his executive officer "Bubba"
* he sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of "Bassmaster"
* he programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens
* he paints the starship John Deere green
* he refers to a Pulsar as a "Blue Light Special"
* he refers to the Mutara Nebula as a "swamp"
* his moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale
* he sings "Lucille" instead of "Kathleen"
* his idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls
* he wears mirrored shades on the Bridge
* his idea of a "gas giant" is that big ol' XO Bubba after a meal of
beans and weenies
* he sets phaser to "Cajun"

* There's a "grits" setting on the food processor.
--
Doc Smartass, BAAWA Knight of Heckling
aa # 1939
No one can terrorize a whole nation, unless we are all his accomplices.
--Edward R. Murrow
.


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