(~) Another Way To Celebrate The 12 Days Of Christmas
By Tom Neven
Everyone knows the words to "The 12 Days Of Christmas" although I must
admit they mystify me in places. Who would really want 10 lords a leaping
for Christmas? Who needs guys leaping about the house creating a ruckus
and knocking over all the lamps? And the two turtledoves, not to mention
that partridge, would surely lead to a big mess, especially once our two
cats found out about them. So here's an idea: Let's update the list to
make it relevant today. Let's give gifts that strengthen our marriages and
family. (And never mind if the rhythm of the sentences is all wrong).
1. On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me a zipper: It's
usually wiser to keep your lip zipped than to compound a problem. Everyone
should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. (James
1:19)
2. On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me a calculator:
This is a special calculator, with the cancel key prominently placed in
the center of the pad, conveniently twice the size of all the other keys
so it is easy to cancel accounts instead of keeping score. [Love] is not
rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record
of wrongs. (1 Corinthians 13:5)
3. On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me a duffel bag:
This model has two handles, one on each side so the load is lighter for
both of us. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill
the law of Christ. (Galatians 6:2)
4. On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me a ballerina
doll: Nothing epitomizes grace and balance like a ballerina, and a loving
spouse even more so. A spouse of noble character who can find? Such a one
is worth far more than rubies.... Such a one is clothed with strength and
dignity. (Proverbs 31:10,25)
5. On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me a shovel: This is
a Smokey Bear shovel so we can put out sparks before they become raging
fires. In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are
still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. (Ephesians 4:26-27)
6. On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me a pocket watch:
This timepiece is carried in a breast pocket, close to the heart, so we
can remember to give each other time to grow. It was he who gave.....to
prepare God's people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may
be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of
the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the
fullness of Christ. (Ephesians 4:11-13)
7. On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me a Monopoly
game: You can own houses on every street, but you're still poor without a
a soulmate. Houses and wealth are inherited from parents, but a soulmate
is from the Lord. (Proverbs 19:14)
8. On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me a candle and
sealing wax: Do not neglect to keep the fires burning or to seal your love
for each other. Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your
arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave.
It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. (Song of Songs 8:6)
9. On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me some super glue:
Tearing apart two things joined by super glue results in damage to both.
So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined
together, let not man separate. (Matthew 19:6)
10. On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me a spice jar:
That way we can season our words with grace, encouragement and love. Do
not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is
helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may
benefit those who listen. (Ephesians 4:29)
11. On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me a washcloth:
This cloth has God's Word embroidered on it. ... love your soulmate, just
as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy,
cleansing her by the washing with water through the word. (Ephesians
5:25-26)
12. On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me a turtledove:
Well, maybe they were on to something when they wrote the original
version. How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes
are doves. (Song of Songs 1:15)
Ninure Saunders aka Rainbow Christian
http://Rainbow-Christian.tk
The Lord is my Shepherd and He knows I'm Gay
http://Ninure-Saunders.tk
My Yahoo Group
http://Ninure.tk
My Online Diary
http://www.ninure.deardiary.net
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Universal Fellowship of Metropolitan Community Churches
http://www.MCCchurch.org
To send e-mail, remove nohate from address
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