| Topic: |
Religions > Bible |
| User: |
"• Ninure Saunders" |
| Date: |
25 Jun 2005 07:24:55 AM |
| Object: |
(~) GOOD GRIEF... BAD GRIEF |
(~) GOOD GRIEF... BAD GRIEF
"Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep" (Romans
12:15, NKJV).
Jeanette Lockerbie, a former editor of Psychology for Living magazine,
tells about a minister friend whose wife died suddenly. With her husband,
she had been very active in the church and was dearly loved by all the
church members.
"I remember so well the church announcement of her funeral service: 'Come,
and wear your brightest colours as we celebrate her home-going,'"
Lockerbie reported.
"Fine. This congregation was just following the teaching this minister had
given them for a score of years. Everyone did the 'right' thing: the
minister bore up admirably and 'celebrated' with his people the death of
his life partner.
"Months later, I happened to be a guest in the home where this minister
was also visiting. I scarcely recognized the ghost of the man he had
become. His deep sorrow at the snatching away of his loved wife,
suppressed in the interest of 'Christian' expectations of him, had worked
its devastation in his life, both physically and emotionally."
His "brave front" was nothing but a mask to hide his true feelings. Such
masks are deadening.
This is bad grief and is very destructive -- physically, emotionally and
spiritually.
Some time ago in an article in "The Reader's Digest," John Kord Lagemann
tells about another minister's reaction to death: "Recently the minister
of our church had to carry tragic news to the parents of a twelve-year-old
boy. Their son had drowned on a school outing. Later, the parents told me,
'The minister didn't preach or tell us to be brave. He broke into tears
and wept with us. We will always love him for that'" (August 1967).*
This is good grief and is healing physically, emotionally and spiritually.
God gave us tears to express our grief so let's not bottle them up when we
suffer sorrow, loss, or especially heartbreak.
Pax Christi,
• Ninure Saunders aka Rainbow Christian
Jesus is my Shepherd and He knows I'm Gay
http://Ninure-Saunders.tk
My Yahoo Group
http://Ninure.tk
Universal Fellowship of Metropolitan Community Churches
http://www.MCCchurch.org
The Bible Site - help provide free scripture
http://www.thebiblesite.org
To send e-mail, remove nohate from address
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