| Topic: |
Religions > Bible |
| User: |
"Heywood Jablomi" |
| Date: |
30 Dec 2006 01:53:38 PM |
| Object: |
Bible Quiz |
Few Christians really know what horrors are lurking in the "Holy Book". For
example, did you know that the god of the Old Testament accepted
human sacrifices?[1] That he would be disgusted by poop if you did not cover it
up?[2] That the King James version of the Bible uses the word "*****"?[3] That
the Old Testament says that only men with their ***** and balls in a perfect
uninjured state can enter into the congregation of the lord?[4] That the Bible
says that females are worth only half as much as males?[5] That King David had
a man killed so he could ***** the man's wife at will?[6] That Moses ordered all
Midianites murdered except for the young virgin girls, whom the soldiers could
keep for their own pleasure?[7] That the Old Testament said to murder anyone
among your family or friends that merely suggests you join a different
religion?[8] That the Old Testament on at least one occasion condones abduction
and rape?[9]
[1] See the story of Jephthah, who sacrificed his daughter to God (who accepted
the sacrifice by virtue of not stopping it) after making a stupid promise:
Judges 11.
[2] The hilarious story of the poop paddles is found in Deuteronomy 23:12-14:
"Thou shalt have a place also without the camp, whither thou shalt go forth
abroad: And thou shalt have a paddle upon thy weapon; and it shall be, when
thou wilt ease thyself abroad, thou shalt dig therewith, and shalt turn back
and cover that which cometh from thee: For the LORD thy God walketh in the
midst of thy camp, to deliver thee, and to give up thine enemies before thee;
therefore shall thy camp be holy: that he see no unclean thing in thee, and
turn away from thee."
[3] 2Ki 18:27 But Rabshakeh said unto them, Hath my master sent me to thy
master, and to thee, to speak these words? [hath he] not [sent me] to the men
which sit on the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own
***** with you?Isa 36:12 But Rabshakeh said, Hath my master sent me to thy
master and to thee to speak these words? [hath he] not [sent me] to the men
that sit upon the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own
***** with you?
[4] "He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off, shall
not enter into the congregation of the LORD." -Deuteronomy 23:1
[5] Leviticus 27
[6] 2nd Samuel 11. Elsewhere in the Bible this kind of behavior is supposed to
be punished by death. But morality is situational and relativistic in the
Bible, not absolute, and so all that happens here is that the ***** child
gets sick.
[7] Numbers 31.
[8] Deuteronomy 13
[9] Judges 21
--
If I was in charge of the universe, St Jude's
Hospital for Children would not need to exist
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| User: "Mark Earnest" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
30 Dec 2006 04:46:03 PM |
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"Heywood Jablomi" wrote
If I was in charge of the universe, St Jude's
Hospital for Children would not need to exist
Yeah, you would have a universe of wimps that never needed to
prove themelves.
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| User: "SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
30 Dec 2006 04:53:34 PM |
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"Mark Earnest" <gmearnest@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:12pdr14r7hboq61@corp.supernews.com...
"Heywood Jablomi" wrote
If I was in charge of the universe, St Jude's
Hospital for Children would not need to exist
Yeah, you would have a universe of wimps that never needed to
prove themelves.
not sure what that has to do with st. jude's children hospital.
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| User: "Mark Earnest" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
30 Dec 2006 07:36:16 PM |
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"SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim" <killgod@killgod.com> wrote in message
news:O5Clh.8878$X72.404@newsread3.news.pas.earthlink.net...
"Mark Earnest" <gmearnest@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:12pdr14r7hboq61@corp.supernews.com...
"Heywood Jablomi" wrote
If I was in charge of the universe, St Jude's
Hospital for Children would not need to exist
Yeah, you would have a universe of wimps that never needed to
prove themelves.
not sure what that has to do with st. jude's children hospital.
Children's hospitals make heroes out of people.
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| User: "SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
30 Dec 2006 07:40:46 PM |
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"Mark Earnest" <gmearnest@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:12pe509r8u601d4@corp.supernews.com...
"SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim" <killgod@killgod.com> wrote in message
news:O5Clh.8878$X72.404@newsread3.news.pas.earthlink.net...
"Mark Earnest" <gmearnest@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:12pdr14r7hboq61@corp.supernews.com...
"Heywood Jablomi" wrote
If I was in charge of the universe, St Jude's
Hospital for Children would not need to exist
Yeah, you would have a universe of wimps that never needed to
prove themelves.
not sure what that has to do with st. jude's children hospital.
Children's hospitals make heroes out of people.
hospitals exist in the first place because the christian god is a
COLD-HEARTED ***** and he loves to watch people suffer. Thankfully man
always tries to help people, while the COLD-HEARTED ***** christian god
always tries to injure and kill people.
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| User: "Mark Earnest" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
30 Dec 2006 07:49:34 PM |
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"SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim" <killgod@killgod.com> wrote in message
news:yyElh.5424$yx6.2356@newsread2.news.pas.earthlink.net...
"Mark Earnest" <gmearnest@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:12pe509r8u601d4@corp.supernews.com...
"SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim" <killgod@killgod.com> wrote in message
news:O5Clh.8878$X72.404@newsread3.news.pas.earthlink.net...
"Mark Earnest" <gmearnest@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:12pdr14r7hboq61@corp.supernews.com...
"Heywood Jablomi" wrote
If I was in charge of the universe, St Jude's
Hospital for Children would not need to exist
Yeah, you would have a universe of wimps that never needed to
prove themelves.
not sure what that has to do with st. jude's children hospital.
Children's hospitals make heroes out of people.
hospitals exist in the first place because the christian god is a
COLD-HEARTED ***** and he loves to watch people suffer. Thankfully man
always tries to help people, while the COLD-HEARTED ***** christian god
always tries to injure and kill people.
You're crazy. God is the goodness that inspires the workers of children's
hospitals.
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| User: "SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
30 Dec 2006 08:00:22 PM |
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hospitals exist in the first place because the christian god is a
COLD-HEARTED ***** and he loves to watch people suffer. Thankfully man
always tries to help people, while the COLD-HEARTED ***** christian god
always tries to injure and kill people.
You're crazy. God is the goodness that inspires the workers of children's
hospitals.
if the christian god was actually a nice god instead of a COLD-HEARTED
*****, there would be NO need for hospitals in the first place.
.
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| User: "Mark Earnest" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
30 Dec 2006 08:37:34 PM |
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"SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim" <killgod@killgod.com> wrote in message
news:WQElh.8918$X72.2643@newsread3.news.pas.earthlink.net...
hospitals exist in the first place because the christian god is a
COLD-HEARTED ***** and he loves to watch people suffer. Thankfully
man
always tries to help people, while the COLD-HEARTED ***** christian
god
always tries to injure and kill people.
You're crazy. God is the goodness that inspires the workers of
children's
hospitals.
if the christian god was actually a nice god instead of a COLD-HEARTED
*****, there would be NO need for hospitals in the first place.
I guess you expect everything handed to you, without having to struggle to
achieve anything. What a wimp.
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| User: "SheBlewHimDidYouBlowHim" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
31 Dec 2006 06:54:10 AM |
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hospitals exist in the first place because the christian god is a
COLD-HEARTED ***** and he loves to watch people suffer. Thankfully
man
always tries to help people, while the COLD-HEARTED ***** christian
god
always tries to injure and kill people.
You're crazy. God is the goodness that inspires the workers of
children's
hospitals.
if the christian god was actually a nice god instead of a COLD-HEARTED
*****, there would be NO need for hospitals in the first place.
I guess you expect everything handed to you, without having to struggle to
achieve anything. What a wimp.
no, I expect the COLD-HEARTED ***** christian god to quit giving people
diseases such as cancer, alzheimers, heart disease, liver disease, etc.,
etc.
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| User: "Heywood Jablomi" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
30 Dec 2006 11:59:24 PM |
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Mark Earnest <gmearnest@yahoo.com> wrote in message
<12pe8j74c9fha30@corp.supernews.com>
I guess you expect everything handed to you, without having to struggle to
achieve anything. What a wimp.
Good point. Please give me all your stuff and I'll give it back to you only
when you finally earn it.
--
If I was in charge of the universe, St Jude's
Hospital for Children would not need to exist
Posted with JSNewsreader Preview 0.9.7.3152
[ Followup-To: alt.bible ]
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| User: "Mark Earnest" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
31 Dec 2006 12:45:00 PM |
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"Heywood Jablomi" <IBlowHim@IAmGoingTo.com> wrote in message
news:459751b5$0$17007$4c368faf@roadrunner.com...
Mark Earnest <gmearnest@yahoo.com> wrote in message
<12pe8j74c9fha30@corp.supernews.com>
I guess you expect everything handed to you, without having to struggle
to
achieve anything. What a wimp.
Good point. Please give me all your stuff and I'll give it back to you
only
when you finally earn it.
That does not follow.
--
If I was in charge of the universe, St Jude's
Hospital for Children would not need to exist
Posted with JSNewsreader Preview 0.9.7.3152
[ Followup-To: alt.bible ]
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| User: "Heywood Jablomi" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
31 Dec 2006 12:02:41 AM |
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Mark Earnest <gmearnest@yahoo.com> wrote in message
<12pdr14r7hboq61@corp.supernews.com>
"Heywood Jablomi" wrote
If I was in charge of the universe, St Jude's
Hospital for Children would not need to exist
Yeah, you would have a universe of wimps that never needed to
prove themelves.
So you are saying that childhood cancers and diseases are good then?
Damn, some of you Christians are awfully cold and unfeeling.
--
If I was in charge of the universe, St Jude's
Hospital for Children would not need to exist
[ Followup-To: alt.bible ]
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| User: "Mark Earnest" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
31 Dec 2006 12:43:48 PM |
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"Heywood Jablomi" <IBlowHim@IAmGoingTo.com> wrote in message
news:4597527b$0$17002$4c368faf@roadrunner.com...
Mark Earnest <gmearnest@yahoo.com> wrote in message
<12pdr14r7hboq61@corp.supernews.com>
"Heywood Jablomi" wrote
If I was in charge of the universe, St Jude's
Hospital for Children would not need to exist
Yeah, you would have a universe of wimps that never needed to
prove themelves.
So you are saying that childhood cancers and diseases are good then?
Evil is not good, but its being there causes the valiant.
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| User: "Opie" |
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| Title: Re: Bible Quiz |
30 Dec 2006 02:26:31 PM |
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On Sat, 30 Dec 2006 13:53:38 -0600, "Heywood Jablomi"
<IBlowHim@IAmGoingTo.com> wrote:
Few Christians really know what horrors are lurking in the "Holy Book".
For
example, did you know that the god of the Old Testament accepted
human sacrifices?[1] That he would be disgusted by poop if you did not
cover it
up?[2] That the King James version of the Bible uses the word "*****"?[3]
That
the Old Testament says that only men with their ***** and balls in a
perfect
uninjured state can enter into the congregation of the lord?[4] That the
Bible
says that females are worth only half as much as males?[5] That King
David had
a man killed so he could ***** the man's wife at will?[6] That Moses
ordered all
Midianites murdered except for the young virgin girls, whom the soldiers
could
keep for their own pleasure?[7] That the Old Testament said to murder
anyone
among your family or friends that merely suggests you join a different
religion?[8] That the Old Testament on at least one occasion condones
abduction
and rape?[9]
[1] See the story of Jephthah, who sacrificed his daughter to God (who
accepted
the sacrifice by virtue of not stopping it) after making a stupid
promise:
Judges 11.
[2] The hilarious story of the poop paddles is found in Deuteronomy
23:12-14:
"Thou shalt have a place also without the camp, whither thou shalt go
forth
abroad: And thou shalt have a paddle upon thy weapon; and it shall be,
when
thou wilt ease thyself abroad, thou shalt dig therewith, and shalt turn
back
and cover that which cometh from thee: For the LORD thy God walketh in
the
midst of thy camp, to deliver thee, and to give up thine enemies before
thee;
therefore shall thy camp be holy: that he see no unclean thing in thee,
and
turn away from thee."
[3] 2Ki 18:27 But Rabshakeh said unto them, Hath my master sent me to
thy
master, and to thee, to speak these words? [hath he] not [sent me] to
the men
which sit on the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their
own
***** with you?Isa 36:12 But Rabshakeh said, Hath my master sent me to
thy
master and to thee to speak these words? [hath he] not [sent me] to the
men
that sit upon the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink
their own
***** with you?
[4] "He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off,
shall
not enter into the congregation of the LORD." -Deuteronomy 23:1
[5] Leviticus 27
[6] 2nd Samuel 11. Elsewhere in the Bible this kind of behavior is
supposed to
be punished by death. But morality is situational and relativistic in
the
Bible, not absolute, and so all that happens here is that the *****
child
gets sick.
[7] Numbers 31.
[8] Deuteronomy 13
[9] Judges 21
What a poopy story!
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