| Topic: |
Religions > Bible |
| User: |
"Illegitimi Non Carborundum" |
| Date: |
09 Jul 2003 10:34:56 AM |
| Object: |
Cross-carrying street evangelists? |
Cross-Carrying Street Evangelists?
By Ed Babinski
A friend of mine, Ken Nahigian (a former fundamentalist not on this list,
but whose testimony is in LEAVING THE FOLD), wrote today and told me the
following story...
------------
My latest odd experience here. It has no connection to anything else; I
just
wanted to share the story.
As I returned from work last night, a man was carrying a large wooden cross
on his back down my street. It was truly huge, crucifixion-size. Getting
closer, I saw he had installed a small wheel at the bottom so he wouldn't
have to bear all the weight, just sort of roll it along. The workmanship
seemed pretty good, actually. Polished and stained, wood-pegged, nice
woodgrain. I thought, I should get this guy's business card, keep him in
mind for all my crucifixion needs.
He halted & stared at me. I pulled into my driveway, got out, walked
toward my front door, carrying my briefcase & staring back. "Hello," he
said.
"Hello," I answered; "now why is it I just know you have literature for
me?"
"Yes I do," he said, handing me a leaflet, "and Jesus loves you."
I took it and thanked him. The leaflet turned out to be somewhat cartoony,
scrawled stick-figures and bible passages he'd apparently cut out with an
exacto knife and glued irregularly to a master page and run through a
Xerox. A good desktop publishing system might have helped. But that, I
suppose, would spoil the charm.
Otherwise he seemed pleasant. No rants or bulging eye-whites. I waved at
him as he rolled the cross on down the street -- out of my anecdote and
into someone else's, surely.
God speed.
(:{>
---------------------------------------------
I might have asked him with a sly grin
"Is it Easter already?"
Or,
"Just How Much Authenticity Are You Going For My Cross Carrying Friend?
Might I suggest that you carry the cross with one hand while whipping
yourself with the other?"
Or,
"I see you've installed a little wheel at the rear of your crucifix, just
like Jesus had."
Or,
"Mind if I take her round the block for a few laps? Here, hold the keys to
my Porche. It won't take a minute." (Then run off with his cross, leaving
him holding an unuseable key that unlocks nothing.)
Or,
Quote that verse about giving to all who ask, asking nothing in return, and
ask for his cross, see if he'll give it up to you. If he does, walk away
remarking to yourself how fine it will look once you set it aflame at the
next Klan Meeting.
Or,
"How many miles per gallon do you get with that thing?"
Or,
"Well, if it isn't Jeesus!"
Or,
"I bet you get fabulous reception with that antenaa, but wouldn't it be
easier to just carry a walkman?"
Or,
Just point and say, "Uh...I think Golgotha's THAT way."
Who was that fool evangelist who trudged across north Africa carrying a
cross? Arthur Blessed in the 1970s. About a hundred miles across Africa he
realized that the end of his cross was being worn down, so he put a little
wheel on it. There was also a South American evangelist who had himself
crucified on live TV in the 1980s for a few hours, I believe.
There was a doctor in attendance. And of course, there's those Catholic
converts in the Philipines, who have themselves crucified every Easter. Gee,
why couldn't Jesus have just been eaten by sharks? Then his followers would
be running down the street in bathing suits dragging a blow-up shark doll by
a string.
Best, Edward T. Babinski, author, Leaving the Fold
When in beautiful downtown webville please visit
http://www.infidels.org/library/modern/ed_babinski/
http://www.talkorigins.org/faqs/ce/index.html
www.edwardtbabinski.us
.
|
|
| User: "Clayton Cant Stop the Music...or the Voices!" |
|
| Title: Re: Cross-carrying street evangelists? |
09 Jul 2003 08:48:54 PM |
|
|
"Illegitimi Non Carborundum" <nospam@edwardbabinski.com> wrote in message
news:behcn2$545eh$1@ID-199142.news.dfncis.de...
Cross-Carrying Street Evangelists?
By Ed Babinski
A friend of mine, Ken Nahigian (a former fundamentalist not on this list,
but whose testimony is in LEAVING THE FOLD), wrote today and told me the
following story...
------------
<snip>
This idiot has been around for years. When they found the remains of MMOH
he made a "holy pilgrimage" to the site to pray for her damned atheist soul.
Many of us went to his site to tell him off for disrespecting the feelings
of many people, but like most fundo idiots with a website, he made sure that
all critical posts where erased within minutes of being posted. He's just a
fool proudly and publicly showing off his foolishness.
.
|
|
|
|
| User: "" |
|
| Title: Re: Cross-carrying street evangelists? |
09 Jul 2003 08:28:43 PM |
|
|
I hate to admit it, but back in my high school years, before I knew what was
what and who was doing who in the back room of the church, I, too, once
carried a big wood cross . . . right smack dab through beautiful downtown
Milford, Mass.
It was some local Council of Churches ecumenical thing back in 1972 . . .
hah, got my picture on the front page of the local newspaper, dour face and
all. I vividly recall glaring through restaurant windows along the way,
as if to say, "Why the hell aren't YOU following Jesus!" It was so
bizarre . . . but everyone thought it was so orthodox. . . . Also recall
the head deacon from the babtist church was pissed 'cause he didn't get to
carry the cross at the head of the ecumenical procession. My gosh, I
should be socially embarrased over this . . . but, it does show that some
folks manage to recover from a sad life of religiosity . . .
.
|
|
|
|
|
Related Articles |
|
|
