| Topic: |
Sociology > Depression |
| User: |
"lisa in mass." |
| Date: |
29 Sep 2004 12:55:10 AM |
| Object: |
alone tonight |
it's scary. i'm safest when i keep worrying about what would
happen if i woke joe. now he's across the state for a night out
'with the guys'. he'll be back tomorrow afternoon.
also scary is that i have to be the responsible adult here. up
at 6 am to make breakfast and lunch and snacks and get them on
the bus by 7:15. i usually have to set my alarm for appts before
1 pm. joe does the whole morning thing, since he leaves for work
at 7:30 anyway.
doesn't help that i'm not sleeping, partly worrying about being
alone with myself, part because i slept half the day with this
cold. i've got about 4 hrs until my alarm rings.
my pdoc said today that i'm the one who knows best my needs.
what i need to do when, what level of intervention is going to
help. said he trusted i'd know when i can't take anymore of
this. i have before. hope i will this time, too. i just don't
trust my lack of decisiveness lately. can't seem to make up my
mind about anything minor. we'll have to see about the big
stuff.
-lisa
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| User: "K-9" |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
29 Sep 2004 03:12:32 AM |
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On 29 Sep 2004 05:55:10 GMT, "lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> <wrote
the following>
it's scary. i'm safest when i keep worrying about what would
happen if i woke joe. now he's across the state for a night out
'with the guys'. he'll be back tomorrow afternoon.
also scary is that i have to be the responsible adult here. up
at 6 am to make breakfast and lunch and snacks and get them on
the bus by 7:15. i usually have to set my alarm for appts before
1 pm. joe does the whole morning thing, since he leaves for work
at 7:30 anyway.
doesn't help that i'm not sleeping, partly worrying about being
alone with myself, part because i slept half the day with this
cold. i've got about 4 hrs until my alarm rings.
my pdoc said today that i'm the one who knows best my needs.
what i need to do when, what level of intervention is going to
help. said he trusted i'd know when i can't take anymore of
this. i have before. hope i will this time, too. i just don't
trust my lack of decisiveness lately. can't seem to make up my
mind about anything minor. we'll have to see about the big
stuff.
-lisa
Two days ago grandmother was talking about how she had early on done
with next to no sleep as she tracked various things she had to be
responsible for in her family as a child.
Yesterday I drove back from the hospital and I had entered the relm of
sleep deprivation.
Two nights ago I dreamed that I always knew when the rabbit was going
to jump out of the hat. That point at which dream state takes over
while in process of functioning in the world. Attached to that was a
very bad feeling while dreaming and a brief fractile like image.
I was stressed.
When I drove back from the hospital my mind was going at a very slow
rate and everything swirled in pastel fractile shape. The leaves are
beginning to turn a beautiful color (colour\%spellchecker) and the
light condition and humidity made it most surreal.
I understand what you describe with your relation to your p-doc.
I hope you get more sleep at some point.
regards
K-9
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
29 Sep 2004 12:26:40 PM |
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K-9 wrote...
On 29 Sep 2004 05:55:10 GMT, "lisa in mass."
<mccats@rcn.com> <wrote the following>
it's scary. i'm safest when i keep worrying about what
would happen if i woke joe. now he's across the state for a
night out 'with the guys'. he'll be back tomorrow
afternoon.
also scary is that i have to be the responsible adult here.
up at 6 am to make breakfast and lunch and snacks and get
them on the bus by 7:15. i usually have to set my alarm for
appts before 1 pm. joe does the whole morning thing, since
he leaves for work at 7:30 anyway.
doesn't help that i'm not sleeping, partly worrying about
being alone with myself, part because i slept half the day
with this cold. i've got about 4 hrs until my alarm rings.
my pdoc said today that i'm the one who knows best my
needs. what i need to do when, what level of intervention
is going to help. said he trusted i'd know when i can't
take anymore of this. i have before. hope i will this time,
too. i just don't trust my lack of decisiveness lately.
can't seem to make up my mind about anything minor. we'll
have to see about the big stuff.
-lisa
Two days ago grandmother was talking about how she had
early on done with next to no sleep as she tracked various
things she had to be responsible for in her family as a
child.
Yesterday I drove back from the hospital and I had entered
the relm of sleep deprivation.
Two nights ago I dreamed that I always knew when the rabbit
was going to jump out of the hat. That point at which dream
state takes over while in process of functioning in the
world. Attached to that was a very bad feeling while
dreaming and a brief fractile like image. I was stressed.
When I drove back from the hospital my mind was going at a
very slow rate and everything swirled in pastel fractile
shape. The leaves are beginning to turn a beautiful color
(colour\%spellchecker) and the light condition and humidity
made it most surreal.
I understand what you describe with your relation to your
p-doc.
I hope you get more sleep at some point.
regards
K-9
thanks. i did get a few hours sleep. i remember last fall when
i wasn't sleeping more than an hr or so a night, and how
surreal the colors were and the world around them. it was
beautiful.
-lisa
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| User: "Contrarian" |
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| Title: rain rain |
29 Sep 2004 02:05:55 AM |
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just realized I have to shop for food tomorrow... I was
actually ready to get up and do that _now_ and it's
raining do I go out and get somewhat wet or what?
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
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| Title: Re: rain rain |
29 Sep 2004 12:23:02 PM |
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Contrarian wrote...
just realized I have to shop for food tomorrow... I was
actually ready to get up and do that _now_ and it's
raining do I go out and get somewhat wet or what?
did you go?
-lisa
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| User: "% surfs@uniserve" |
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| Title: Re: rain rain |
29 Sep 2004 12:27:55 PM |
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"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message news:Xns9573881D1405Emccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
Contrarian wrote...
just realized I have to shop for food tomorrow... I was
actually ready to get up and do that _now_ and it's
raining do I go out and get somewhat wet or what?
did you go?
-lisa
don't you have a rain coat
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
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| Title: Re: rain rain |
29 Sep 2004 12:37:40 PM |
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% wrote...
"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns9573881D1405Emccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
Contrarian wrote...
just realized I have to shop for food tomorrow... I was
actually ready to get up and do that _now_ and it's
raining do I go out and get somewhat wet or what?
did you go?
-lisa
don't you have a rain coat
well, i know it poured here yesterday. when i went out, i was
soaked to the skin anyplace the raincoat didn't cover. nothing
like spending 5 hrs is soaking wet jeans when i've already got
a cold.
-lisa
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| User: "% surfs@uniserve" |
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| Title: Re: rain rain |
29 Sep 2004 12:46:48 PM |
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"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message news:Xns95738A980422Bmccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
% wrote...
"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns9573881D1405Emccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
Contrarian wrote...
just realized I have to shop for food tomorrow... I was
actually ready to get up and do that _now_ and it's
raining do I go out and get somewhat wet or what?
did you go?
-lisa
don't you have a rain coat
well, i know it poured here yesterday. when i went out, i was
soaked to the skin anyplace the raincoat didn't cover. nothing
like spending 5 hrs is soaking wet jeans when i've already got
a cold.
-lisa
that's whem you need to take some dry clothes with you
but , you don't get colds from being wet anyway
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
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| Title: Re: rain rain |
29 Sep 2004 12:55:32 PM |
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% wrote...
"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns95738A980422Bmccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
% wrote...
"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns9573881D1405Emccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
Contrarian wrote...
just realized I have to shop for food tomorrow... I
was actually ready to get up and do that _now_ and
it's raining do I go out and get somewhat wet or
what?
did you go?
-lisa
don't you have a rain coat
well, i know it poured here yesterday. when i went out, i
was soaked to the skin anyplace the raincoat didn't cover.
nothing like spending 5 hrs is soaking wet jeans when i've
already got a cold.
-lisa
that's whem you need to take some dry clothes with you
but , you don't get colds from being wet anyway
no, but sure feels miserable. besides, i'd have had to try to
change in the car, or in the store i went to to buy clothes.
security camera people don't like to see people's clothes
change in the rest rooms.
-lisa
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| User: "% surfs@uniserve" |
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| Title: Re: rain rain |
29 Sep 2004 02:04:58 PM |
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"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message news:Xns95738D9F880F1mccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
% wrote...
"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns95738A980422Bmccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
% wrote...
"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns9573881D1405Emccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
Contrarian wrote...
just realized I have to shop for food tomorrow... I
was actually ready to get up and do that _now_ and
it's raining do I go out and get somewhat wet or
what?
did you go?
-lisa
don't you have a rain coat
well, i know it poured here yesterday. when i went out, i
was soaked to the skin anyplace the raincoat didn't cover.
nothing like spending 5 hrs is soaking wet jeans when i've
already got a cold.
-lisa
that's whem you need to take some dry clothes with you
but , you don't get colds from being wet anyway
no, but sure feels miserable. besides, i'd have had to try to
change in the car, or in the store i went to to buy clothes.
security camera people don't like to see people's clothes
change in the rest rooms.
-lisa
i am powerless over what people like or don't like
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| User: "Contrarian" |
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| Title: Re: rain rain |
29 Sep 2004 12:37:41 PM |
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lisa in mass. <mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
Contrarian wrote...
raining do I go out and get somewhat wet or what?
did you go?
yes, big store was closed (thought it was 24 hours) little
ones were out of stuff ... no soba, Rice Krispies, etc.
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
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| Title: Re: rain rain |
29 Sep 2004 12:38:51 PM |
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Contrarian wrote...
lisa in mass. <mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
Contrarian wrote...
raining do I go out and get somewhat wet or what?
did you go?
yes, big store was closed (thought it was 24 hours) little
ones were out of stuff ... no soba, Rice Krispies, etc.
crap. after you went out in the rain.
-lisa
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| User: "Contrarian" |
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| Title: Re: rain rain |
29 Sep 2004 12:45:00 PM |
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lisa in mass. <mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
Contrarian wrote...
crap, after you went out in the rain.
just a drizzle. but re-planning my day has taken a lot of
mental effort I apparently didn't have. am going out again now
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
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| Title: Re: rain rain |
29 Sep 2004 12:56:38 PM |
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Contrarian wrote...
lisa in mass. <mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
Contrarian wrote...
crap, after you went out in the rain.
just a drizzle. but re-planning my day has taken a lot of
mental effort I apparently didn't have. am going out again now
i have to take my kid to the therp in a little while. not
looking forward to it.
-lisa
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| User: "Contrarian" |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
29 Sep 2004 02:00:10 AM |
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lisa in mass. <mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
doesn't help that i'm not sleeping, partly worrying about being
alone with myself, part because i slept half the day with this
cold. i've got about 4 hrs until my alarm rings.
It's 3 a.m. here now. How are you (asleep I hope)
.
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
29 Sep 2004 12:09:17 PM |
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Contrarian wrote...
lisa in mass. <mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
doesn't help that i'm not sleeping, partly worrying about
being alone with myself, part because i slept half the day
with this cold. i've got about 4 hrs until my alarm rings.
It's 3 a.m. here now. How are you (asleep I hope)
that's just about the time i shut down to sleep. got 3 hrs in
before i had to wake the kids. as soon as they were gone, i went
back to bed.
-lisa
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| User: "=^.^=" |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
29 Sep 2004 10:00:34 PM |
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On 29 Sep 2004 17:09:17 GMT, "lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
It's 3 a.m. here now. How are you (asleep I hope)
that's just about the time i shut down to sleep. got 3 hrs in=20
before i had to wake the kids. as soon as they were gone, i went=20
back to bed.
I'm targeting an 11AM uptime to check with The Pharmacy
I went in after I got a MRI and showed pharmacy theSenate
Bill 6088, Sect. 5, re. dispensing the preferred drug, re.
Chapter 69.41 Revised Washington Code. paperwork was
filled-out properly and faxed to the endorsing practitioner
the preferred drug, methocarbamol, 750mg tablets, is now
showing in-progress, with a fill-date of 9-29-04, in-process
next time I see the doc, I'll have him write the carisoporodol
script as a DAW (dispense as written), which will be filled...
I could score a script for the soma tomorrow at my alternate
pharmacy, but I'd have to cough-up something like $35U$D...
I can stuff the pain, and hit it with Eastern Europe diazepam
....known to reduce the kicked-in sensation considerably
I'm adverse to applying the clonazepam, since that's one
of the sleep-disorder targeting drugs, altho it works good
I think I'll order-up a bunch of lorazepam. itz actually a bit
cheaper than the diazepam, and targets the pain better...
plus, no annoying active metabolites. I just hate-em...
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
29 Sep 2004 10:53:53 PM |
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=^.^= wrote...
On 29 Sep 2004 17:09:17 GMT, "lisa in mass."
<mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
It's 3 a.m. here now. How are you (asleep I hope)
that's just about the time i shut down to sleep. got 3 hrs
in before i had to wake the kids. as soon as they were
gone, i went back to bed.
I'm targeting an 11AM uptime to check with The Pharmacy
I went in after I got a MRI and showed pharmacy theSenate
Bill 6088, Sect. 5, re. dispensing the preferred drug, re.
Chapter 69.41 Revised Washington Code. paperwork was
filled-out properly and faxed to the endorsing practitioner
the preferred drug, methocarbamol, 750mg tablets, is now
showing in-progress, with a fill-date of 9-29-04,
in-process
next time I see the doc, I'll have him write the
carisoporodol script as a DAW (dispense as written), which
will be filled...
I could score a script for the soma tomorrow at my
alternate pharmacy, but I'd have to cough-up something like
$35U$D...
I can stuff the pain, and hit it with Eastern Europe
diazepam
...known to reduce the kicked-in sensation considerably
I'm adverse to applying the clonazepam, since that's one
of the sleep-disorder targeting drugs, altho it works good
I think I'll order-up a bunch of lorazepam. itz actually a
bit cheaper than the diazepam, and targets the pain
better...
plus, no annoying active metabolites. I just hate-em...
glad you're getting the right med. it sucks when you have to
fight beaurocracy to get what you need.
-lisa
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| User: "% surfs@uniserve" |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
29 Sep 2004 11:18:57 PM |
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"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message news:Xns9573F310C6B6Fmccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
=^.^= wrote...
On 29 Sep 2004 17:09:17 GMT, "lisa in mass."
<mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
It's 3 a.m. here now. How are you (asleep I hope)
that's just about the time i shut down to sleep. got 3 hrs
in before i had to wake the kids. as soon as they were
gone, i went back to bed.
I'm targeting an 11AM uptime to check with The Pharmacy
I went in after I got a MRI and showed pharmacy theSenate
Bill 6088, Sect. 5, re. dispensing the preferred drug, re.
Chapter 69.41 Revised Washington Code. paperwork was
filled-out properly and faxed to the endorsing practitioner
the preferred drug, methocarbamol, 750mg tablets, is now
showing in-progress, with a fill-date of 9-29-04,
in-process
next time I see the doc, I'll have him write the
carisoporodol script as a DAW (dispense as written), which
will be filled...
I could score a script for the soma tomorrow at my
alternate pharmacy, but I'd have to cough-up something like
$35U$D...
I can stuff the pain, and hit it with Eastern Europe
diazepam
...known to reduce the kicked-in sensation considerably
I'm adverse to applying the clonazepam, since that's one
of the sleep-disorder targeting drugs, altho it works good
I think I'll order-up a bunch of lorazepam. itz actually a
bit cheaper than the diazepam, and targets the pain
better...
plus, no annoying active metabolites. I just hate-em...
glad you're getting the right med. it sucks when you have to
fight beaurocracy to get what you need.
-lisa
i know , i still can't convience them that i would manage really well ,
if only i could get heroin in a perscription
.
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
29 Sep 2004 11:38:34 PM |
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% wrote...
"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns9573F310C6B6Fmccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
=^.^= wrote...
<snip>
glad you're getting the right med. it sucks when you have
to fight beaurocracy to get what you need.
-lisa
i know , i still can't convience them that i would manage
really well , if only i could get heroin in a perscription
i told a pdoc in-patient that they should give out opium to
depressoids when nothing else works. he whole-heartedly agreed,
told me i'd have to get some of the stuff coming in through
oregon. not what i expected to hear froma doc...
-lisa
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| User: "Alan Harding" |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
29 Sep 2004 11:47:12 PM |
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In message <10ln2aoss6kufe@corp.supernews.com>, %
<surfs@uniserve.?.invalid> writes
"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns9573F310C6B6Fmccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...
=^.^= wrote...
On 29 Sep 2004 17:09:17 GMT, "lisa in mass."
<mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
It's 3 a.m. here now. How are you (asleep I hope)
that's just about the time i shut down to sleep. got 3 hrs
in before i had to wake the kids. as soon as they were
gone, i went back to bed.
I'm targeting an 11AM uptime to check with The Pharmacy
I went in after I got a MRI and showed pharmacy theSenate
Bill 6088, Sect. 5, re. dispensing the preferred drug, re.
Chapter 69.41 Revised Washington Code. paperwork was
filled-out properly and faxed to the endorsing practitioner
the preferred drug, methocarbamol, 750mg tablets, is now
showing in-progress, with a fill-date of 9-29-04,
in-process
next time I see the doc, I'll have him write the
carisoporodol script as a DAW (dispense as written), which
will be filled...
I could score a script for the soma tomorrow at my
alternate pharmacy, but I'd have to cough-up something like
$35U$D...
I can stuff the pain, and hit it with Eastern Europe
diazepam
...known to reduce the kicked-in sensation considerably
I'm adverse to applying the clonazepam, since that's one
of the sleep-disorder targeting drugs, altho it works good
I think I'll order-up a bunch of lorazepam. itz actually a
bit cheaper than the diazepam, and targets the pain
better...
plus, no annoying active metabolites. I just hate-em...
glad you're getting the right med. it sucks when you have to
fight beaurocracy to get what you need.
i know , i still can't convience them that i would manage really well ,
if only i could get heroin in a perscription
They're probably just waiting for you to ask for diamorphine. You have
to ask for generics here.
--
The opinions given above may be mine. They might also
just be what I feel like saying right now, okay?
.
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| User: "=^.^=" |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
30 Sep 2004 01:21:26 AM |
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On 30 Sep 2004 03:53:53 GMT, "lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
I think I'll order-up a bunch of lorazepam. itz actually a
bit cheaper than the diazepam, and targets the pain
better...=20
=20
plus, no annoying active metabolites. I just hate-em...
glad you're getting the right med. it sucks when you have to=20
fight beaurocracy to get what you need.
-lisa
I have a feeling the fights won't end untill I'm dead dead dead=20
like, they simply don't give a *****...
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
30 Sep 2004 01:27:43 AM |
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=^.^= wrote...
On 30 Sep 2004 03:53:53 GMT, "lisa in mass."
<mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
I think I'll order-up a bunch of lorazepam. itz actually
a bit cheaper than the diazepam, and targets the pain
better...
plus, no annoying active metabolites. I just hate-em...
glad you're getting the right med. it sucks when you have
to fight beaurocracy to get what you need.
-lisa
I have a feeling the fights won't end untill I'm dead dead
dead
like, they simply don't give a *****...
nope, they don't. they just follow the paperwork.
-lisa
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| User: "=^.^=" |
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| Title: Re: alone tonight |
30 Sep 2004 03:52:56 AM |
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On 30 Sep 2004 06:27:43 GMT, "lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote:
I have a feeling the fights won't end untill I'm dead dead
dead=20
=20
like, they simply don't give a *****...
nope, they don't. they just follow the paperwork.
that's what I took to the pharmacy. downloads
from the DSHS Rx (.gov) site, outlining the rules
I have no problem taking care of paperwork...
paperwork is paperwork, machines are machines
if I can get a professional to relate to me as a colleague
or someone who knows (depends) the right amount of
info, and isn't hostile or ethnically incorrect, I can click
this doesn't include arrogant ones with Mandarin attitude
and you don't have to be from China to have one...
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