Catholic girls
With a tiny little mustache
Catholic girls
Do you know how they go?
Catholic girls
In the rectory basement
Father Riley's a fairy
But it don't bother Mary
Catholic girls
At the cyo
Catholic girls
Do you know how they go?
Catholic girls
There can be no replacement
How do they go, after the show?

All the way
Thats the way they go
Every day
And none of their mamas ever seem to know
Hip-hip-hooray
For all the class they show
Theres nothing like a catholic girl
At the cyo
When they learn to blow...

They're learning to blow
All the catholic boys!

Warren Cuccurullo...

Catholic boys!

Kinda young, kinda wow!

Catholic boys!

Vinnie Colaiuta...

Where are they now?
Did they all take the vow?

Catholic girls

Carmenita Scarfone!

Catholic girls

Hey! she gave me vd!

Catholic girls!

Toni Carbone!

With a tongue like a cow
She could make you go wow!

Vd vowdy vootie
Right away
Thats the way they go
Every day
Whenever their mamas take them to a show
Matinee
Pass the popcorn please
Theres nothing like a catholic girl
With her hand in the box
When she's on her knees

She was on her knees,
My little catholic girl

In a little white dress
Catholic girls
They never confess
Catholic girls
I got one for a cousin
I love how they go
So send me a dozen
Catholic girls
Ooooooh!
Catholic girls
Ooooooh!
(etc.)

Central scrutinizer:
This is the central scrutinizer...
Joe had a girl friend named Mary.
She used to go the church club every week.
Theyd meet each other there
Hold hands
And think pure thoughts
But one night at the social club meeting
Mary didn't show up...
She was sucking ***** backstage at the armory
In order to get a pass
To see some big rock group for free...