As for you personally, you're one of the strongest people I know.

"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns98F5B9B5512Emccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...

<snipped for brevity>

I hope I can give her all she gave me when I needed it.
This isn't going to be easy.

-lisa

Probably not but if anyone can do it, you can. In my
experience, every time I have been in a situation where I
had to be "the strong one" being there for someone else in
a time of crisis was more empowering than it was a danger
of dragging me down. Even though I was afraid it might, it
didn't. As for you personally, you're one of the strongest
people I know. Your perspective on that from inside your
own head might be different, but from my side of the
screen, I can say that if I ever needed someone to be there
for me the way your friend does, I would want it to be you.
Good luck Lisa. You and your friend will be in my
thoughts.

"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns98F5B9B5512Emccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...

Tomorrow I'm going to go visit a good friend of mine.
She's home recouperating from reconstructive surgery after
a double mastectomy last fall due to breast cancer.
Today's exactly one week since her last surgery, and she
said to me on the phone today that yesterday was when the
whole thing hit her. She held up through the initial
surgery and cancer treatment by always looking to see what
to do to best handle the next step, at least physically,
and now that part's done and the weight of what happened
to her just crashed down hard. She's very depressed, long
crying spells, no appetite though she's making herself
eat. It's probably good that she has another week off work
to recover more physically.

Now I have to be the strong one. She drove me to ECT at
least a dozen times a number of years ago, now I need to
be supportive of her. Depression's kicking my butt
tonight, but I have to get up tomorrow and be ok for
someone else. I hope she doesn't bring me further down,
but I really want to be there for her. If I'm not there
tomorrow, she'll be home feeling miserable alone which
isn't good. We're supposed to get a major snow storm
tomorrow and she's an hour's drive from me, but I'm going
regardless.

I hope I can give her all she gave me when I needed it.
This isn't going to be easy.

-lisa

Hey Lisa,

You may have already left, but I know you'll make it hun.
You are a very strong and compassionate woman. It's
difficult to be supportive when we need it ourselves. This
is the pay it forward thing Rhi and I were discussing and I
started a thread about it. Kudos to you, we're here when
you get back!

Jane

"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns98F5B9B5512Emccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...

Tomorrow I'm going to go visit a good friend of mine.
She's home recouperating from reconstructive surgery after
a double mastectomy last fall due to breast cancer.
Today's exactly one week since her last surgery, and she
said to me on the phone today that yesterday was when the
whole thing hit her. She held up through the initial
surgery and cancer treatment by always looking to see what
to do to best handle the next step, at least physically,
and now that part's done and the weight of what happened
to her just crashed down hard. She's very depressed, long
crying spells, no appetite though she's making herself
eat. It's probably good that she has another week off work
to recover more physically.

Now I have to be the strong one. She drove me to ECT at
least a dozen times a number of years ago, now I need to
be supportive of her. Depression's kicking my butt
tonight, but I have to get up tomorrow and be ok for
someone else. I hope she doesn't bring me further down,
but I really want to be there for her. If I'm not there
tomorrow, she'll be home feeling miserable alone which
isn't good. We're supposed to get a major snow storm
tomorrow and she's an hour's drive from me, but I'm going
regardless.

I hope I can give her all she gave me when I needed it.
This isn't going to be easy.

You are a true friend. Good luck, Lisa.

Hi Lisa,

It might be helpful for her to visit a sleep lab, including run an EEG. It
may be that she isn't getting enough sleep, maybe they might be able to find
something that's going on. Perhaps she could do well on similar medication
to what I'm taking for depression including a mood stabalizer. Am sorry to
hear about the cancer, I know its a traumatic thing to go through.

David

"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns98F5B9B5512Emccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4...

Tomorrow I'm going to go visit a good friend of mine. She's home
recouperating from reconstructive surgery after a double
mastectomy last fall due to breast cancer. Today's exactly one
week since her last surgery, and she said to me on the phone
today that yesterday was when the whole thing hit her. She held
up through the initial surgery and cancer treatment by always
looking to see what to do to best handle the next step, at least
physically, and now that part's done and the weight of what
happened to her just crashed down hard. She's very depressed,
long crying spells, no appetite though she's making herself eat.
It's probably good that she has another week off work to recover
more physically.

Now I have to be the strong one. She drove me to ECT at least a
dozen times a number of years ago, now I need to be supportive
of her. Depression's kicking my butt tonight, but I have to get
up tomorrow and be ok for someone else. I hope she doesn't bring
me further down, but I really want to be there for her. If I'm
not there tomorrow, she'll be home feeling miserable alone which
isn't good. We're supposed to get a major snow storm tomorrow
and she's an hour's drive from me, but I'm going regardless.

I hope I can give her all she gave me when I needed it. This
isn't going to be easy.

-lisa

In message <Xns98F5B9B5512Emccatsjavanetcom@130.133.1.4>,
lisa in mass. <mccats@rcn.com> writes

Tomorrow I'm going to go visit a good friend of mine. She's
home recouperating from reconstructive surgery after a
double mastectomy last fall due to breast cancer. Today's
exactly one week since her last surgery, and she said to me
on the phone today that yesterday was when the whole thing
hit her. She held up through the initial surgery and cancer
treatment by always looking to see what to do to best
handle the next step, at least physically, and now that
part's done and the weight of what happened to her just
crashed down hard. She's very depressed, long crying
spells, no appetite though she's making herself eat. It's
probably good that she has another week off work to recover
more physically.

Now I have to be the strong one. She drove me to ECT at
least a dozen times a number of years ago, now I need to be
supportive of her. Depression's kicking my butt tonight,
but I have to get up tomorrow and be ok for someone else. I
hope she doesn't bring me further down, but I really want
to be there for her. If I'm not there tomorrow, she'll be
home feeling miserable alone which isn't good. We're
supposed to get a major snow storm tomorrow and she's an
hour's drive from me, but I'm going regardless.

I hope I can give her all she gave me when I needed it.
This isn't going to be easy.

I expect you'll manage more easily than you expect. You
come across as the sort of person whose depression will
give way to essentials, and helping your friend get through
her depression is an essential for you, isn't it? I hope it
goes well for both of you. If I believed in souls, I'd say
this would be good for yours.

On 16 Mar 2007 05:08:33 GMT, "lisa in mass."
<mccats@rcn.com> wrote:

Tomorrow I'm going to go visit a good friend of mine. She's
home recouperating from reconstructive surgery after a
double mastectomy last fall due to breast cancer. Today's
exactly one week since her last surgery, and she said to me
on the phone today that yesterday was when the whole thing
hit her. She held up through the initial surgery and cancer
treatment by always looking to see what to do to best
handle the next step, at least physically, and now that
part's done and the weight of what happened to her just
crashed down hard. She's very depressed, long crying
spells, no appetite though she's making herself eat. It's
probably good that she has another week off work to recover
more physically.

Now I have to be the strong one. She drove me to ECT at
least a dozen times a number of years ago, now I need to be
supportive of her. Depression's kicking my butt tonight,
but I have to get up tomorrow and be ok for someone else. I
hope she doesn't bring me further down, but I really want
to be there for her. If I'm not there tomorrow, she'll be
home feeling miserable alone which isn't good. We're
supposed to get a major snow storm tomorrow and she's an
hour's drive from me, but I'm going regardless.

I hope I can give her all she gave me when I needed it.
This isn't going to be easy.

-lisa

yeah, that will definitely be tough on you if she is just
crying and searching for answers where there really are
none, I imagine like any trauma time is really your only
remedy...I'd try to cut her off quickly distract her
somehow to avoid the sitting on the couch hating life all
day...that will drive you batty, well more batty

Any specific plans?

On Mar 16, 12:08 am, "lisa in mass." <mcc...@rcn.com>
wrote:

Tomorrow I'm going to go visit a good friend of mine.
She's home recouperating from reconstructive surgery after
a double mastectomy last fall due to breast cancer.
Today's exactly one week since her last surgery, and she
said to me on the phone today that yesterday was when the
whole thing hit her. She held up through the initial
surgery and cancer treatment by always looking to see what
to do to best handle the next step, at least physically,
and now that part's done and the weight of what happened
to her just crashed down hard. She's very depressed, long
crying spells, no appetite though she's making herself
eat. It's probably good that she has another week off work
to recover more physically.

Now I have to be the strong one. She drove me to ECT at
least a dozen times a number of years ago, now I need to
be supportive of her. Depression's kicking my butt
tonight, but I have to get up tomorrow and be ok for
someone else. I hope she doesn't bring me further down,
but I really want to be there for her. If I'm not there
tomorrow, she'll be home feeling miserable alone which
isn't good. We're supposed to get a major snow storm
tomorrow and she's an hour's drive from me, but I'm going
regardless.

I hope I can give her all she gave me when I needed it.
This isn't going to be easy.

-lisa

I dont know what to say, except I hope you are stronger
than me, and best of luck.