well, I did my laundry today.. ..and that's about all I did, aside from
writing about 40 pages of emails back and forth with both of my ex's.
Just a beautiful day, in my basement hovel.
One is having difficulty grasping the complexities of the english language,
and what constitutes a conditional statement without being a direct
confrontation, (ie: if you do thing A, then thing B is necessarily (legally)
going to follow). She really thinks she can bully me into seeing her son,
and doesn't seem to be backing down any time soon. It's really quite sad...
and draining.. .and I've (guiltily) wasted too much time attempting reasoned
discussion with her. I'm almost ready to start blocking her delusional bs
from entering my consciousness any further.
The other is now throwing everything in my face and telling me how I have
more pride than self-confidence (and she's probably right about that one),
and berating me for feeling fucking depressed about our break-up.. ..as if
she didn't make it abudantly clear that there is no going back. I feel like
she's just doing this to rub off the responsibility on to me.. ..her guilt
for leading me through the chase.. ..of dangling herself in front of me to
illicit a response to validate her own insecurities..
but what do I know. .i'm really feeling fucked up. and probably the most
relationship-challenged being in the fucking known universe.
Slept about 3 hours last night, 3 the night before.. ..couldn't manage
napping today even tho I didn't work.. ..ds is in daycare, thank god, cuz I
feel like a recovering junky or something.. ..by place is a wreck, I have a
stack of bills I haven't even opened, havne't brushed my teeth for 2 days,
haven't shaved for about 2 weeks now.. ..it's really sad when things get
like this. ..I feel like cleaning my the hell out of this place..
...as I know I'll feel better if I did.. ..but where to summon the energy?
I haven't even finished unpacking all my ***** yet, since I moved 3 weeks
ago. What do you do with a Vic20 when you've run out of all storage space,
and don't feel like creating a chain of RF switches on the back of your TV,
nevermind the clutter underfoot? Things are just sitting in boxes with
nowhere to go.. ..I wish I had more closet space here. I have too many
sculptures taking up shelf space.. .I should sell them or something.
blah blah de blah ha bleh
Ty
--
____________________________________________________
Gettin' all caught up in a taste test, and it all basically tastes like
crap.
-Beck
.
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| User: "Rhiannon" |
|
| Title: Re: email wars |
26 Oct 2005 03:09:14 AM |
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|
"electro" <pewter_toast@NOhotmailSPAM.com> wrote in message
news:E2z7f.307090$tl2.243789@pd7tw3no...
well, I did my laundry today.. ..and that's about all I did, aside from
writing about 40 pages of emails back and forth with both of my ex's.
If it makes you feel any better, you're a step, perhaps several steps ahead
of me. I should have done laundry two days ago but took a turn for the
worst and there it sits, mocking me.
Just a beautiful day, in my basement hovel.
One is having difficulty grasping the complexities of the english
language,
and what constitutes a conditional statement without being a direct
confrontation, (ie: if you do thing A, then thing B is necessarily
(legally)
going to follow). She really thinks she can bully me into seeing her son,
and doesn't seem to be backing down any time soon. It's really quite
sad...
and draining.. .and I've (guiltily) wasted too much time attempting
reasoned
discussion with her. I'm almost ready to start blocking her delusional bs
from entering my consciousness any further.
In the same situation I would send ONE more e-mail that reads..."No further
correspondences will be accepted. Have your laywer call my laywer." Then
block sender.
The other is now throwing everything in my face and telling me how I have
more pride than self-confidence (and she's probably right about that one),
and berating me for feeling fucking depressed about our break-up.. ..as if
she didn't make it abudantly clear that there is no going back. I feel
like
she's just doing this to rub off the responsibility on to me.. ..her guilt
for leading me through the chase.. ..of dangling herself in front of me to
illicit a response to validate her own insecurities..
This one - just the..."No further correspondences will be accepted." Then
block sender.
Then mean it. Stand your ground. Do not subject yourself to the abuse.
There is nothing more either of them can say that hasn't already been said.
Any conversation beyond this point will only serve to stress you out further
and you don't need that. Step back, regroup, and do what you have to do to
protect yourself emotionally.
but what do I know. .i'm really feeling fucked up. and probably the most
relationship-challenged being in the fucking known universe.
Slept about 3 hours last night, 3 the night before.. ..couldn't manage
napping today even tho I didn't work.. ..ds is in daycare, thank god, cuz
I
feel like a recovering junky or something.. ..by place is a wreck, I have
a
stack of bills I haven't even opened, havne't brushed my teeth for 2 days,
haven't shaved for about 2 weeks now.. ..it's really sad when things
get
like this. ..I feel like cleaning my the hell out of this place..
..as I know I'll feel better if I did.. ..but where to summon the energy?
I haven't even finished unpacking all my ***** yet, since I moved 3 weeks
ago. What do you do with a Vic20 when you've run out of all storage
space,
and don't feel like creating a chain of RF switches on the back of your
TV,
nevermind the clutter underfoot? Things are just sitting in boxes with
nowhere to go.. ..I wish I had more closet space here. I have too many
sculptures taking up shelf space.. .I should sell them or something.
blah blah de blah ha bleh
Ty
As for the rest of it. One thing at a time. The big picture is too
overwhelming. You started with laundry. Move on one thing at time. Pay
one bill. Unpack one box. Clean up one chore at time..dishes in the
morning...bathroom in the afternoon...toys the next day...until you work
through all of it. Break it down into increments that you can handle more
easily with rest periods in between and a reward for yourself when the task
is completed. The more you accomplish the more control you regain and the
more control you regain the stronger you will feel. Be gentle with
yourself. You're doing an amazing job so far given all your responsibility
and all you've been through. Give yourself some credit for that. :)
--
Rhiannon
rhianon@sympatico.ca
The Labyrinth
http://thelabyrinthofr.blogspot.com
.
|
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| User: "electro" |
|
| Title: Re: email wars |
26 Oct 2005 04:39:33 AM |
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|
If it makes you feel any better, you're a step, perhaps several steps
ahead
of me. I should have done laundry two days ago but took a turn for the
worst and there it sits, mocking me.
heh, I think mine was actually sitting at the ready for a couple days too.
In the same situation I would send ONE more e-mail that reads..."No
further
correspondences will be accepted. Have your laywer call my laywer." Then
block sender.
My brother has given me basically the same advice. I know there is great
merit in this. And I'm kind of chewing on my lip about it all....
This one - just the..."No further correspondences will be accepted." Then
block sender.
With my recent ex, we've been friends for years before we started going
out.. ..it wasn't until we got into a relationship that things got to be too
heavy. I know I probably made her sound worse than she is. We're both
equally responsible (or innocent, however you look at it) for our
relationship not working out. I do need space from her, yes. But we both
still (intellectually) love each other, and likely always will. I'm friends
with a lot of my ex's, just not the psycho ones.
Any conversation beyond this point will only serve to stress you out
further
and you don't need that. Step back, regroup, and do what you have to do
to
protect yourself emotionally.
gonna do this one, yup..
As for the rest of it. One thing at a time. The big picture is too
overwhelming. You started with laundry. Move on one thing at time <snip>
I was into a really good regime for awhile, where I made lists of
everything.. ..guess I just need to do it again. blah!
thank you Rhiannon.. ..you're support is warmly appreciated, whether or not
I take yours or my own advice will wait to be seen..
.
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| User: "Contrarian" |
|
| Title: Re: email wars |
26 Oct 2005 11:50:41 PM |
|
|
electro <pewter_toast@nohotmailspam.com> wrote:
well, I did my laundry today.. ..and that's about all I did, aside from
writing about 40 pages of emails back and forth with both of my ex's.
Just a beautiful day, in my basement hovel.
Congratulations on the laundry. Why 40pp? Just
don't let them run you around in circles.
--
but the edge is still Out there. Or maybe it's In... HST (1967)
when i got to the edge , i built a deck % (2005)
.
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
|
| Title: Re: email wars |
25 Oct 2005 06:28:59 PM |
|
|
electro wrote...
well, I did my laundry today.. ..and that's about all I
did, aside from writing about 40 pages of emails back and
forth with both of my ex's.
Just a beautiful day, in my basement hovel.
One is having difficulty grasping the complexities of the
english language, and what constitutes a conditional
statement without being a direct confrontation, (ie: if you
do thing A, then thing B is necessarily (legally) going to
follow). She really thinks she can bully me into seeing
her son, and doesn't seem to be backing down any time soon.
It's really quite sad... and draining.. .and I've
(guiltily) wasted too much time attempting reasoned
discussion with her. I'm almost ready to start blocking
her delusional bs from entering my consciousness any
further.
The other is now throwing everything in my face and telling
me how I have more pride than self-confidence (and she's
probably right about that one), and berating me for feeling
fucking depressed about our break-up.. ..as if she didn't
make it abudantly clear that there is no going back. I
feel like she's just doing this to rub off the
responsibility on to me.. ..her guilt for leading me
through the chase.. ..of dangling herself in front of me to
illicit a response to validate her own insecurities..
but what do I know. .i'm really feeling fucked up. and
probably the most relationship-challenged being in the
fucking known universe.
Slept about 3 hours last night, 3 the night before..
..couldn't manage napping today even tho I didn't work..
..ds is in daycare, thank god, cuz I feel like a recovering
junky or something.. ..by place is a wreck, I have a stack
of bills I haven't even opened, havne't brushed my teeth
for 2 days, haven't shaved for about 2 weeks now..
..it's really sad when things get like this. ..I
feel like cleaning my the hell out of this place.. ..as I
know I'll feel better if I did.. ..but where to summon the
energy?
I haven't even finished unpacking all my ***** yet, since I
moved 3 weeks ago. What do you do with a Vic20 when you've
run out of all storage space, and don't feel like creating
a chain of RF switches on the back of your TV, nevermind
the clutter underfoot? Things are just sitting in boxes
with nowhere to go.. ..I wish I had more closet space here.
I have too many sculptures taking up shelf space.. .I
should sell them or something.
blah blah de blah ha bleh
Ty
e-bay?
sorry to hear about the exes. it must have been especially
draining trying to deal with them both at once. hard to
believe that ex #2 is blaming you for the depression. are you
supposed to be happy that she broke up with you? some people
don't understand how other folks work very well.
-lisa
.
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