% wrote...

"lisa in mass." <mccats@rcn.com> wrote in message
news:Xns94C55052A03Dmccatsjavanetcom@199.184.165.239...

i'm going to crash hard tonight if i don't fall sleep
first. night's always a a=bad time for me, but this time
i'm going crash and burn. unless the exhaustion wins
toniht and knocks me out for the worst of it. night is
hell. being awake at night is double hell. changing meds
tomorrow won't help tonight.maybe i can get through it.

my therp went through all my crisis numbers with him, his
pager, my pdoc's contact info, the local crisis number. i
know too wel where the hospital is if it gets to that
point. the lines are no good. too impulsive. by the time
i've dialed, the deed is done. way too impulsive. that's
lack of sleep talking, I know.if this didn't affect other
people the way it does, i would have done something
drastic years ago. tonight, i'n nit sure how much i care.
maybe i'll sleep for an hour or two and see what things
look like then. see you later,i guess.

-lisa

bye Lisa

bye, as soon as you tell me about your town next door.

-lisa