Brianversion wrote:

It's gonna be OK, it just seems like there has
to be a major crisis for the family to get along. My sister is grateful
that she can vent to me. And tomorrow will be another day.

Geez, Brian, you deserve a medal. Better
yet, you deserve someone to take some
care of you.

very lucky to meet Bob, though -- and
vice versa.

Gayle"

Ya gotta laugh Brian, otherwise you'd spend an awful lot of time crying over
it...
Yup, I think so, Jane. Am I the only one with a head game mother? I always was jealous of kids with parents who were like concerned, and said, "OK honey. Be home at ten..." Of course, they all seem to have turned out as white collar criminals and wife cheaters. My mother has to learn that there is only so much time. I used to watch The Sopranos and say, "There's Mom!"

"Brianversion" <brianguitar@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1163898848.581459.212800@h54g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...

My sister lives with her husband, 2 kids and my mother, a few houses
away. I moved down here after my fathers death. I was going nuts
taking care of Bob then, and grieving...I had lived with my mother in
our hometown, up till 5 years ago. Out of the 5 kids, me and my sister
are similar to each other. I used to call her and say, "this psycho
woman from hell is driving me insane!". My sister would listen, but
just didn't get it. Now she gets it

My sister is going through a lot of grief over the old man's death. My
mother has a hard assed quality. Mom treats the 2 kids like she
treated all of us when we were kids. And my sister can't stand it.
When I first came here and heard my mother and her gossip, I wasn't
used to it, I'd just say, "it's hard living with people." Tonight
there was a little incident. I was on the phone with my mother. She
says, "wait a minute..." and starts calling upstairs to my sister. My
niece, who is scared of my mother, answered, but mom kept screaming for
my sister (who was on the can). My mother came back on the phone and
said, 'Sam(golden puppy) ***** on my rug!'. Okay, so mom comes over to
watch Bob for a minute while I go shopping. She tells me my sister
went ape ***** after I got off the phone. She had thought it was an
emergency. Said some things to mom, and mom adopted that passive
thing..."gee, I don't know what you mean." So on the way out, I celled
my sister, and said, 'OK, let me hear it...' and she was crying and
yelling, told me some things that mom had said and done today. I went
shopping, walked my mother to her car afterwards. I told her she can't
treat the young girl like she treats her. Mom said, "she lies, ya
know..." Oyvey. And mom enjoys the dog, until it does something, then
it's not her dog, it's my sisters. She tried to say how calm she was,
and couldn't understand my sister's behavior (psycho nurse in denial).
I said, "I heard you screaming on the phone. You have to stop this
passive stuff, where you start it up, then claim you are the calm one
being victimized... (my mother stood by when my father was beating me,
saying, 'don't hit him in the head, he's crazy.'). She said, 'if I had
the money, I'd move elsewhere.' I said, 'If they had the money, they'd
move you elsewhere.' So mom is the martyr tonight, again. But you know
what? I love them all, and I know life doesn't have to be this way.
Bob never plays emotional head games, that was my great escape 30 years
ago when I met him. His partner played them, but Bob never did. If a
cabinet slams, I jump. But he's not sending me a message, it just
slammed accidentally./ It's gonna be OK, it just seems like there has
to be a major crisis for the family to get along. My sister is grateful
that she can vent to me. And tomorrow will be another day. Thanks for
reading this.
Brian