ive been losing friends for a very long time now. mostly because of me
complaining about guys i know and cutting and drinking and stuff. they
really dont care to help, they just leave when i need them most. like
right now.. ive been clean for almost a month. or actually i WAS...i
swore to my boyfriend i wouldnt cut and kept it for htat long becuz i
loved him so much,but now we got in a fight and im waiting for him to
come back to school to dump him cuz im just sick of his bull *****
everyday and my friends, like i said, are ditching me. my bestfriends
mom died and i tried to be sympathetic but i suck at that stuff and she
held it against me and now wont talkt ot me and her and my other
bestfriends know i like this guy so theyre trying to get him to hate me
and hook me back up with my ex to get me out of the way and i dont need
that right now. my moms torn apart over eveything, her boyfriened just
walked out again last night after he pormiseds he wouldnt and i guess
its partially my fault. idn. im just so confused and ive never done
drugs in my life, just inhalants, and now im asking ppl for weed and
stuff because theres just gotta be a way to get this out with out
leaving scars. my mom turned my wrists toward her 2 day to see if i was
cutting but all the cuts are on the top so she didnt see i know its bad
bc now she cant help me but im not sure if i want her help anyway. im
disntant and rebellious and torn apart and very explosive right now and
with a knife at home and drugs to be gotten at the end of then day, im
a little scared.
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