| Topic: |
Sociology > Depression |
| User: |
"Dmitriy G." |
| Date: |
21 Apr 2005 08:01:34 AM |
| Object: |
few questions and thoughts |
Hi,
I got some questions and thoughts regarding some issues here.
It's not unusual (they say) to feel better when you talk about your
problems, be it a bad mood or depression, especially to your friend
or someone close who you can trust. But why is it it's the opposite
reaction for me, precisely, i feel WORSE when i speak about
my problems, even to someone close to me or nice....
I feel so terrible then, that i don't even want to see that person again!
Has anyone experienced the same reaction?
Is it because I don't want to be exposed or misunderstood?
One of my thoughts about it, is that I think I don't want to be
wrongly analyzed or have someone form wrong conclusion about
me or even change their attitude to me because of what i tell them!
Why do you think other people feel better and say it helps when
they go see a shrink or talk to whoever they go to, but I on the other
hand, don't want to go to anyone to talk about it, but rather deal
with it myself.... ? Anyone experienced anything like I do?
By the way, i'm not as depressed as i might sound, but i do feel
aweful often because of my problems, bad circumstances, and kind
of getting used to this state so much, that i don't even want to feel
better..
Best regards,
Dmitriy.
Home page: http://www.unifiedonline.ws
Email:
.
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| User: "Rhiannon" |
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| Title: Re: few questions and thoughts |
22 Apr 2005 11:45:05 AM |
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"Dmitriy G." <> wrote in message
news:OuN9e.1602$zX7.880@newssvr13.news.prodigy.com...
Hi,
I got some questions and thoughts regarding some issues here.
It's not unusual (they say) to feel better when you talk about your
problems, be it a bad mood or depression, especially to your friend
or someone close who you can trust. But why is it it's the opposite
reaction for me, precisely, i feel WORSE when i speak about
my problems, even to someone close to me or nice....
I feel so terrible then, that i don't even want to see that person again!
Has anyone experienced the same reaction?
Is it because I don't want to be exposed or misunderstood?
One of my thoughts about it, is that I think I don't want to be
wrongly analyzed or have someone form wrong conclusion about
me or even change their attitude to me because of what i tell them!
Why do you think other people feel better and say it helps when
they go see a shrink or talk to whoever they go to, but I on the other
hand, don't want to go to anyone to talk about it, but rather deal
with it myself.... ? Anyone experienced anything like I do?
By the way, i'm not as depressed as i might sound, but i do feel
aweful often because of my problems, bad circumstances, and kind
of getting used to this state so much, that i don't even want to feel
better..
Best regards,
Dmitriy.
Home page: http://www.unifiedonline.ws
Email:
Welcome :)
Prior to my first visit to a psychiatrist I felt as you did. Terrified - as
you said - that she would misunderstand me or form untrue opinions. Then I
realized something. I was not afraid of what she would think of me as much
as I was afraid that she would be right about me. That her opinions or
diagnosis would be correct and I would have to face the fact that I was ill.
At that point I was pretty desperate, so I went to see her anyway, and the
plain truth of it is, she quite literally saved my life. It is embarrassing
at first and it takes a lot of courage to talk about such personal matters,
but I think that if you can just get over that first hurdle, it's worth it.
The only thing I would caution you about is be very careful who you trust,
and who you talk to. Unfortunately, not all of your family or friends may
understand, and choosing the wrong person to confide in can make you feel
worse. Stick with people you have absolute faith in, or better yet a
professional whose job it is to help you deal with these things while making
you feel as comfortable as possible, or even here, in this group where most
of us are struggling with illness, and can relate to what you're going
through. An illness of the mind is no different than an illness of the body
and there is no shame in asking for help. Hang in there and take care. :)
--
rhianon@sympatico.ca
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| User: "lisa in mass." |
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| Title: Re: few questions and thoughts |
21 Apr 2005 05:23:01 PM |
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Dmitriy G. wrote...
Hi,
I got some questions and thoughts regarding some issues
here. It's not unusual (they say) to feel better when you
talk about your problems, be it a bad mood or depression,
especially to your friend or someone close who you can
trust. But why is it it's the opposite reaction for me,
precisely, i feel WORSE when i speak about my problems,
even to someone close to me or nice.... I feel so terrible
then, that i don't even want to see that person again! Has
anyone experienced the same reaction? Is it because I don't
want to be exposed or misunderstood? One of my thoughts
about it, is that I think I don't want to be wrongly
analyzed or have someone form wrong conclusion about me or
even change their attitude to me because of what i tell
them! Why do you think other people feel better and say it
helps when they go see a shrink or talk to whoever they go
to, but I on the other hand, don't want to go to anyone to
talk about it, but rather deal with it myself.... ? Anyone
experienced anything like I do? By the way, i'm not as
depressed as i might sound, but i do feel aweful often
because of my problems, bad circumstances, and kind of
getting used to this state so much, that i don't even want
to feel better..
Best regards,
Dmitriy.
Home page: http://www.unifiedonline.ws
Email:
when i talk to my therapist, or people i know well and can
talk to openly in detail, it often opens up strong emotions.
they usually aren't pleasant. however, the more i talk, i
general, the better i feel in the long run. it's only a short-
term problem to talk to people.
-lisa
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| User: "Nom dePlume nomdeplume1000-at-yahoo.com" |
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| Title: Re: few questions and thoughts |
22 Apr 2005 12:13:11 AM |
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I would say that this is an individual thing. It works for some
people, and not for others. The ones it works for are obvious, and
their therapists are happy, so the clients talk about how good it is
to talk about how depressed they are, and how much happier they are
when they talk about how depressed they are, while the therapists tell
everyone else to talk about how depressed they are, so they will find
happiness in talking about depression.
That has never worked for me. I've found that it makes no significant
difference to depression as I've experienced it, as to whether I talk
about it or not. What made the difference for me is finding the right
medications (which was a very difficult struggle).
--
Nom dePlume, Ph.D.
Why, yes, in fact, I am a rocket scientist.
Guide to Medications for Mental Illness:
http://www.geocities.com/nomdeplume1000
=====
"Dmitriy G." <> wrote in message
news:OuN9e.1602$zX7.880@newssvr13.news.prodigy.com...
Hi,
I got some questions and thoughts regarding some issues here.
It's not unusual (they say) to feel better when you talk about your
problems, be it a bad mood or depression, especially to your friend
or someone close who you can trust. But why is it it's the opposite
reaction for me, precisely, i feel WORSE when i speak about
my problems, even to someone close to me or nice....
I feel so terrible then, that i don't even want to see that person
again!
Has anyone experienced the same reaction?
Is it because I don't want to be exposed or misunderstood?
One of my thoughts about it, is that I think I don't want to be
wrongly analyzed or have someone form wrong conclusion about
me or even change their attitude to me because of what i tell them!
Why do you think other people feel better and say it helps when
they go see a shrink or talk to whoever they go to, but I on the
other
hand, don't want to go to anyone to talk about it, but rather deal
with it myself.... ? Anyone experienced anything like I do?
By the way, i'm not as depressed as i might sound, but i do feel
aweful often because of my problems, bad circumstances, and kind
of getting used to this state so much, that i don't even want to
feel
better..
Best regards,
Dmitriy.
Home page: http://www.unifiedonline.ws
Email:
.
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| User: "áñti-ëVêrYtHïñG" |
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| Title: Re: few questions and thoughts |
21 Apr 2005 12:31:36 PM |
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On Thu, 21 Apr 2005 13:01:34 GMT, "Dmitriy G." <dmitriy@unifiedonline.ws>
wrote:
Hi,
Hi
I got some questions and thoughts regarding some issues here.
It's not unusual (they say) to feel better when you talk about your
problems, be it a bad mood or depression, especially to your friend
or someone close who you can trust. But why is it it's the opposite
reaction for me, precisely, i feel WORSE when i speak about
my problems, even to someone close to me or nice....
I feel so terrible then, that i don't even want to see that person again!
Has anyone experienced the same reaction?
Saying "you should talk about what's going on inside your head" is like
saying "smile, you'll feel better" or "you should exercise". Sometimes you
don't want to talk because you're incapable of talking for a number of
reasons. Don't pay any attention to those around you who try to lever words
out of your mouth. When the time is right, you'l talk, and then if you only
want to.
Is it because I don't want to be exposed or misunderstood?
One of my thoughts about it, is that I think I don't want to be
wrongly analyzed or have someone form wrong conclusion about
me or even change their attitude to me because of what i tell them!
Perfectly valid reasons why not to talk.
Why do you think other people feel better and say it helps when
they go see a shrink or talk to whoever they go to, but I on the other
hand, don't want to go to anyone to talk about it, but rather deal
with it myself.... ? Anyone experienced anything like I do?
By the way, i'm not as depressed as i might sound, but i do feel
aweful often because of my problems, bad circumstances, and kind
of getting used to this state so much, that i don't even want to feel
better..
Because people think of depression in their own reference frame. Just because
your great auntie Agnes found it helpful to talk when she was depressed, that
doesn't mean what worked for her will work for you. Depression varies between
being blue and a complete powering down of the mind and body, but yet they're
both labelled depression.
I'm sure you'll talk if and when you want to talk (maybe its about finding
the right peson to talk to). Until then, do what is right for you.
.
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