% wrote:

<Icnh@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1141337698.492928.77010@p10g2000cwp.googlegroups.com...

that's such a tough thing to do... I wish there was a simple ,
effective way to let it go...



-"alvintchase"

well if its that hard to do ,
don't let it go , just stuff it down ,
and medicate it with something like alcohol

but then it never leaves, it just gets hidden and comes back... I
try to rationalize the anger away... I sometimes think that letting go
of anger is about being selfish, in a positive sense... it's about not
wanting to let other people make us unhappy, it's about forgivving so
we can be happy... I try to remember that., and tell myself that, but I
have a tough time actrually doing it...

-"alvintchase"

GuardianAngel wrote:

that's such a tough thing to do... I wish there was a simple ,
effective way to let it go...



-"alvintchase"

maybe finding a way to

express yourself will also help..drawing, playing an instrument,
writting, singing are things that can help you express your
anger...getting rid of the negative energy by creating something
positive always works for me

thanks, I like that idea... I've thought about that sometimes, that
If I can somehow channel anger, resentment, bitterness, all the
negativity into some kind of positive action I'll be doing something
positive... kind of like when I was a kid and feeling angry, I'd go for
a short run and feel better...or I'd play my recorder, that would help
sometimes too... sometimes, even writing a conciliatory note to someone
I was really angry with has helped... I really did feel better
afterwards...

-"alvintchase"

Charles wrote:

On 2 Mar 2006 14:14:58 -0800,

that's such a tough thing to do... I wish there was a simple ,
effective way to let it go...



-"alvintchase"

Thanks it. anger is a warning of some sort of danger. Thanks it for
warning you and tell it you'll take over now.

what about when it's anger over a lot of things from the past?

-"alvintchase"

Charles wrote:

On 2 Mar 2006 14:14:58 -0800,

that's such a tough thing to do... I wish there was a simple ,
effective way to let it go...



-"alvintchase"

Thanks it. anger is a warning of some sort of danger. Thanks it for
warning you and tell it you'll take over now.

what about when it's anger over a lot of things from the past?

-"alvintchase"

On Thu, 02 Mar 2006 22:55:07 GMT, CyberDroog
<CyberDroog@ClockworkOrange.com> wrote:

On 2 Mar 2006 14:14:58 -0800,

that's such a tough thing to do... I wish there was a simple ,
effective way to let it go...

I've never understood it either. The question is what exactly are you
letting go of? Anger doesn't really exist in and of itself. It is a
reaction to either a current event, or rather our thought process related
to an event, or a memory.

If something made you angry when it happened, shouldn't the memory of it
also make you angry? How do you rid yourself of the memory? Some

training yourself not to react emotionally to memories. But that is a

order since the ability to react emotionally to thoughts and memories is
part of our survival instinct. For instance, we react with fear towards
things we encounter that we know from experience to be dangerous. That

a good thing. If we didn't have that automatic process we'd keep trying

pet that cute lion (assuming we survived the first attempt.)

Another reason we wouldn't want to ruin this automatic process is for the
beneficial aspects. We can also laugh at the mere memory of a funny

or become excited over the memory of an adventure (or a naked woman.)
That's a good thing also.

I just don't get what people mean by processing emotions. How do you
process an emotion? All I know how to do is feel an emotion.

Fear of the lion (or respect of it) is useful. When the lion isn't
around, there is no need to maintain the fear. Do you have the
physical arousal that comes with fear of lions right now? I don't.

Anger brings physical arousal as well, stimulates the "fight or
flight" reflexes, which can be useful when dealing with the immediate
situation, devastating long term. I find that when I am angry I don't
think as clearly as I can when I'm not aroused, therefore I find it
better not to be aroused by anger most of the time.

People no doubt tire of me mentioning books.

"Anger" by Carol Tavris, ISBN 0-671-25094-9

I got some good out of it.

Fear of the lion (or respect of it) is useful. When the lion isn't
around, there is no need to maintain the fear. Do you have the
physical arousal that comes with fear of lions right now? I don't.

Anger brings physical arousal as well, stimulates the "fight or
flight" reflexes, which can be useful when dealing with the immediate
situation, devastating long term. I find that when I am angry I don't
think as clearly as I can when I'm not aroused, therefore I find it
better not to be aroused by anger most of the time.