To have dreams of social services coming to the house to take my
daugher away-should I really be having those?
To constantly feel like I'm always yelling at my daughter, acting like
my parents, should I be doing that????
To worry about what is going to go wrong next, is that really how life
is supposed to be?
I know I have depression, but it always amazes me that when I need
help the most, I can't get it when I need it. I finally made an
appointment to see a psychiatrist about putting me on some type of
medication and I was told I couldn't be seen until Jan 20. AND that he
is not a therapist, just gives you the drugs....I found that rather
strange.....
So in the meantime, here I am pulling out my hair strand by strand
creating lovely patches of bald spots in my once beautiful thick head
of hair. Chewing my nails down to whereit causes my fingers to hurt.
Grinding my teeth to the point that my mouth hurts and I can taste
blood all the time. Having a million things running through my head
all at once, causing tension in a great relationship that I have
finally gotten into. Wanted to sleep more than get up and play with my
precious and vibrant little girl. Wishing constantly that the world
would just leave me the ***** alone and yet to have something else go
wrong in my life.
I know, look on the bright side, well it's hard to do when you have all
this crap piled up to the top of your head.
Any hope out there? Anyone to offer advice?
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| User: "Contrarian" |
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| Title: Re: Lost |
12 Dec 2005 04:49:07 AM |
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wrote:
To have dreams of social services coming to the house to take my
daugher away-should I really be having those?
I don't know. Why might you be worried about this?
To constantly feel like I'm always yelling at my daughter, acting like
my parents, should I be doing that????
Oh. Acting like one's parents. A common complaint.
Do you think you yell too much? Does she complain (not
that her views are conclusive.)
Can you get to a Book Borg? Or a non-tiny library.
Take a look at the self help section. There's a lot
there. Don't buy any but the best books, but that's
one thing you can do, if you are up to it. From what
you also say, my guess is that Rx is your first need.
To worry about what is going to go wrong next, is that really how life
is supposed to be?
Ppl tell me it is not. I do know about that.
Being told "it doesn't help to worry" is no help,
is it?
I know I have depression, but it always amazes me that when I need
help the most, I can't get it when I need it. I finally made an
appointment to see a psychiatrist about putting me on some type of
medication and I was told I couldn't be seen until Jan 20. AND that he
is not a therapist, just gives you the drugs....I found that rather
strange.....
Is this a private practioner? If not, if it's a clinic
go there in person as often as you can and ask about
cancellations. Tell them you are suffering with symptoms
a., b., c. as you told us here.
If you have a private GP physician, tell him what is going
on, and ask for referrals on an emergency basis.
Anyone have any other suggestions?
So in the meantime, here I am pulling out my hair strand by strand
creating lovely patches of bald spots in my once beautiful thick head
of hair. Chewing my nails down to whereit causes my fingers to hurt.
Grinding my teeth to the point that my mouth hurts and I can taste
blood all the time.
I'd say you can't wait.
Here's one suggestion: Find a teaching hospital nearby,
call up the psychiatric triage nurse and ask about programs
where pdocs in training treat people. Describe you issues.
You have some *classic* psych symptoms. They *can* be treated.
Any hope out there? Anyone to offer advice?
About the social services issue I hope ppl have more
to offer than I do. From my quite limited experience
with outreach workers, they tend to be a bit more
put off by small amounts of transient mess (the notes
I was taking on notebook paper on the floor and one
(1) empty bean can. (Also the walls were peeling and
really really discolored but that was the owners' refusal
to repair)
I keep the (damp) garbage now in the refrigerator (there's
only mine, also this was bc of the heat in the summer),
put some stuff in the laundry basket and put a towel over it.
I've been known to pile a bunch of stuff on the "bed"
one of those foam cheapies) in a neat stack and put the
spread over it. Hides a lot of stuff. (Of course one
then has the question about where to sleep)
Separation from parents is a prime predictor of later
distress/dysfunction. I can understand why you do not
want this to happen. The newsgroup news:misc.kids
seems to be fairly active. I thought there was a group
about child protective services but I can't find it on
this server's list.
Hoping for other better follow ups and that you
get help soon. Keep us posted if you can.
--
also adrba at nyct dot net
but the edge is still Out there. Or maybe it's In... HST (1967)
when i got to the edge , i built a deck % (2005)
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| User: "scorpsmurf" |
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| Title: Re: Lost |
12 Dec 2005 06:15:30 PM |
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I called a family doctor that knows my family quite well and with a
little luck, I have an appointment tomorrow at 930am....
Yes, I have talked with doctors in the past about my symptoms I am
having.....
Yes it is helpful to talk with a friend, however I don't have many.
The ones I have live too far away and when I call, seems to be
bothering them.
Please don't think that I beat my child, I don't. I would not let
myself get to that point. You see, I was abused as a child by two
different family members, so it's a constant battle to try and not give
in to what they were like, however I don't t hink that I am that low of
a person.
I appreciate all the things you said....and I wouldn't dream of calling
CPS..my biggest fear is that they will say I'm not a fit mother and
take her away from me and let her dad have her, who has not bothered to
see her since she was 2, she is now 4 1/2. I left him because he was
abusive and I didn't want my daughter growing up in the situation. I
guess I just read too many stories about things like that happening or
watch too many movies, get's my mind wondering way too much.
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| User: "David" |
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| Title: Re: Lost |
12 Dec 2005 08:16:11 AM |
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Did the doctor provide a diagnosis? You could find a therapist and case
manager through DHS, through their temporary emergency services, they
could also advise you what would be the best thing to do. Having
someone to talk to is pretty important, even if its just a friend who
knows you pretty well. A therapist would be better though. What
medications did he give you? On your next appointment, it might be
benifical to print this out for your records. That's why I think
journaling is so important is because I often forget what I have to say
during the appointment. Going to the hospital could also be another
option. It doesn't sound like your situation isn't urgant but its
getting close.
I hope things improve soon, am glad you're getting some help.
wildflowersmurf@gmail.com wrote:
To have dreams of social services coming to the house to take my
daugher away-should I really be having those?
To constantly feel like I'm always yelling at my daughter, acting like
my parents, should I be doing that????
To worry about what is going to go wrong next, is that really how life
is supposed to be?
I know I have depression, but it always amazes me that when I need
help the most, I can't get it when I need it. I finally made an
appointment to see a psychiatrist about putting me on some type of
medication and I was told I couldn't be seen until Jan 20. AND that he
is not a therapist, just gives you the drugs....I found that rather
strange.....
So in the meantime, here I am pulling out my hair strand by strand
creating lovely patches of bald spots in my once beautiful thick head
of hair. Chewing my nails down to whereit causes my fingers to hurt.
Grinding my teeth to the point that my mouth hurts and I can taste
blood all the time. Having a million things running through my head
all at once, causing tension in a great relationship that I have
finally gotten into. Wanted to sleep more than get up and play with my
precious and vibrant little girl. Wishing constantly that the world
would just leave me the ***** alone and yet to have something else go
wrong in my life.
I know, look on the bright side, well it's hard to do when you have all
this crap piled up to the top of your head.
Any hope out there? Anyone to offer advice?
.
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| User: "Hexe" |
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| Title: Re: Lost |
12 Dec 2005 09:14:54 AM |
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On 12 Dec 2005 02:10:38 -0800, wrote:
To have dreams of social services coming to the house to take my
daugher away-should I really be having those?
Do you have legitimate reasons to believe this or are you projecting
your insecurities/whatever onto others? Do you feel she should be taken
from you? Do you feel she would be better off with someone else?
To constantly feel like I'm always yelling at my daughter, acting like
my parents, should I be doing that????
My parents didn't behave like this but when my son was 5yo and I got
ANGRY I picked him up and threw him across the room. Luckily, he landed
on the sofa. When I realized what I had done and where it could go, I
ran to the closest therapist.
Oh, yeah. You've tried that.
When I lived in the states, the hospital had emergency psychiatric
services. When I couldn't get out of bed and didn't stop crying for
three days, I went.
To worry about what is going to go wrong next, is that really how life
is supposed to be?
No. I believe that if you think negative, you attract negative. I
believe you are what you think.
. . .
I know, look on the bright side, well it's hard to do when you have all
this crap piled up to the top of your head.
Sometimes the ***** obscures the sun.
I can't do much for you, but I can hold your hand while you talk about
it.
Any hope out there? Anyone to offer advice?
There is always hope, it's what keeps me here.
Advice, no; but I'm a good listener.
--
:Hexe
: Thought for the journey:
"It said, ""Insert disk #3,"" but only two will fit!"
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