I don't know whether or not I have serious depression but I am 21 year
old girl who dropped out of university because the pressure was too
much. I am working full-time as a cook, I live with my bf and my cat
and should be happy but all I can think about are really terrible
things. I feel distant from my friends and that if I didn't have a
computer I wouldn't have any contact with anyone. I have reoccuring
thoughts of suicide and find myself researching everything I can about
it, watching movies, looking at pictures, reading stories. I feel like
I'm not good at anything I used to be (or thought I was) good at, like
photography and piano and I've lost a lot of weight.
I think that if I had a serious mental disorder my parents would've
told me since I am adopted and they have all my paperwork. I cannot
afford a therapist and feel like I am crying wolf for attention if I
think about talking about it with friends and family. My brother is
also facing hard times with homelessness and not being able to hold a
job and it's just getting harder everyday finding a reason to feel
positive.
And I have an online life which I also feel disconnected from. I just
don't know what to do with myself anymore.
all very vague i know, i'm new to this.
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| User: "mighty mouse" |
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| Title: Re: not happy. |
16 Dec 2007 03:06:53 AM |
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wrote:
I don't know whether or not I have serious depression but I am 21 year
old girl who dropped out of university because the pressure was too
much. I am working full-time as a cook, I live with my bf and my cat
and should be happy but all I can think about are really terrible
things. I feel distant from my friends and that if I didn't have a
computer I wouldn't have any contact with anyone. I have reoccuring
thoughts of suicide and find myself researching everything I can about
it, watching movies, looking at pictures, reading stories. I feel like
I'm not good at anything I used to be (or thought I was) good at, like
photography and piano and I've lost a lot of weight.
I think that if I had a serious mental disorder my parents would've
told me since I am adopted and they have all my paperwork. I cannot
afford a therapist and feel like I am crying wolf for attention if I
think about talking about it with friends and family. My brother is
also facing hard times with homelessness and not being able to hold a
job and it's just getting harder everyday finding a reason to feel
positive.
And I have an online life which I also feel disconnected from. I just
don't know what to do with myself anymore.
all very vague i know, i'm new to this.
Hi,
I dropped out of uni at about age 21 due to anxiety, depression and
suicidal thoughts. I was getting treatment from the uni counseling
centre but I still needed to drop out. It's still a disappointment, but
it was then and still is the right decision for me.
I second everyone elses recommendations that you find a clinic with a
pscyhologist or counselor and a psychiatrist (there are a lot of free or
reduced fee clinics out there, in all countries and areas - your GP can
help you find one) and get some treatment. If they tell you you don't
have depression, great, but if you have the suspicion that something is
wrong then you're best to get an assessment and find out exactly rather
than being miserable if you don't have to be.
And there's no reason depression would be in your adoption papers. I
developed mine in my late teens and it's not genetic.
Get a medical assessment to check for physical illnesses (thyroid
problems - and other illnesses - cause depression as a symptom) and a
psychiatric assessment to tell you what's wrong and what you need to do
to fix it.
And just so you know, it's taken me a few years but I've got through the
depression (still struggle with anxiety sometimes, but meds and therapy
help a lot) and I'm living a happy, productive life.
Good luck,
Kylie
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| User: "Noon Cat Nick" |
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| Title: Re: not happy. |
15 Dec 2007 07:42:19 PM |
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wrote:
I don't know whether or not I have serious depression but I am 21 year
old girl who dropped out of university because the pressure was too
much. I am working full-time as a cook, I live with my bf and my cat
and should be happy but all I can think about are really terrible
things. I feel distant from my friends and that if I didn't have a
computer I wouldn't have any contact with anyone. I have reoccuring
thoughts of suicide and find myself researching everything I can about
it, watching movies, looking at pictures, reading stories. I feel like
I'm not good at anything I used to be (or thought I was) good at, like
photography and piano and I've lost a lot of weight.
I think that if I had a serious mental disorder my parents would've
told me since I am adopted and they have all my paperwork. I cannot
afford a therapist and feel like I am crying wolf for attention if I
think about talking about it with friends and family. My brother is
also facing hard times with homelessness and not being able to hold a
job and it's just getting harder everyday finding a reason to feel
positive.
And I have an online life which I also feel disconnected from. I just
don't know what to do with myself anymore.
all very vague i know, i'm new to this.
Not so vague IMO.
You do sound as if you might have depression. But nobody here can make a
diagnosis. You need medical professionals for that.
You might want to get a physical and blood workup done, since many
illnesses have depression as a symptom.
After that, schedule an appt. with a psychiatrist. If finances are a
problem, the mental health district you live in might have community
services that charge on a sliding scale.
Also, you shouldn't necessarily expect that mental disorders would be
listed on your adoption papers. Physical maladies might make it on
there, but it's doubtful you were given any psychiatric diagnosis.
The best persons to talk to about your problems are mental health
professionals--psychiatrists and therapists. Judging from your post, it
sounds as if you need both. Don't think of going to them as begging for
attention. They're trained to help. Again, check with community mental
health services; the funding they receive to operate covers much of the
cost of treatment.
FWIW, I've been where you are--all too often. Dropped out of college
several times due to depression and stress. Overwhelmed with thoughts of
suicide. Lost interest in the things I once enjoyed. Couldn't connect
with others...even online. Felt difficult to talk to others about my
condition, as if I were out for attention and wanted others to feel
sorry for me. At the same time, other members of my family were having
their own difficulties. I've been through all of that, over and over.
Seeking treatment was what finally saved me and brought me back to the
land of the living.
You probably feel both helpless and hopeless. That's part of the
illness. It makes you feel as if nothing can ever get better, and
nothing anyone does can make things better. ***** Cavett had a good
description of what depression does to a person: "What's so diabolical
about it is that, if you put a pill on that table over there that you
could guarantee would lift me out of it, it would be too much trouble to
go get it." Unlike other illnesses, depression often makes a person not
want to seek help. That's one of things that's so hard about it.
Please look into getting help very soon. You don't deserve to have to
live this way.
P.S. Welcome to ASD.
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| User: "%" |
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| Title: Re: not happy. |
15 Dec 2007 05:43:15 PM |
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wrote:
I don't know whether or not I have serious depression but I am 21 year
old girl who dropped out of university because the pressure was too
much. I am working full-time as a cook, I live with my bf and my cat
and should be happy but all I can think about are really terrible
things. I feel distant from my friends and that if I didn't have a
computer I wouldn't have any contact with anyone. I have reoccuring
thoughts of suicide and find myself researching everything I can about
it, watching movies, looking at pictures, reading stories. I feel like
I'm not good at anything I used to be (or thought I was) good at, like
photography and piano and I've lost a lot of weight.
I think that if I had a serious mental disorder my parents would've
told me since I am adopted and they have all my paperwork. I cannot
afford a therapist and feel like I am crying wolf for attention if I
think about talking about it with friends and family. My brother is
also facing hard times with homelessness and not being able to hold a
job and it's just getting harder everyday finding a reason to feel
positive.
And I have an online life which I also feel disconnected from. I just
don't know what to do with myself anymore.
all very vague i know, i'm new to this.
perhaps its time to talk to a mental health care professional
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| User: "Michelle la Belle" |
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| Title: Re: not happy. |
15 Dec 2007 09:55:29 PM |
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On Dec 15, 6:43 pm, "%" <pers...@gmail.com> wrote:
speakne...@gmail.com wrote:
I don't know whether or not I have serious depression but I am 21 year
old girl who dropped out of university because the pressure was too
much. I am working full-time as a cook, I live with my bf and my cat
and should be happy but all I can think about are really terrible
things. I feel distant from my friends and that if I didn't have a
computer I wouldn't have any contact with anyone. I have reoccuring
thoughts of suicide and find myself researching everything I can about
it, watching movies, looking at pictures, reading stories. I feel like
I'm not good at anything I used to be (or thought I was) good at, like
photography and piano and I've lost a lot of weight.
I think that if I had a serious mental disorder my parents would've
told me since I am adopted and they have all my paperwork. I cannot
afford a therapist and feel like I am crying wolf for attention if I
think about talking about it with friends and family. My brother is
also facing hard times with homelessness and not being able to hold a
job and it's just getting harder everyday finding a reason to feel
positive.
And I have an online life which I also feel disconnected from. I just
don't know what to do with myself anymore.
all very vague i know, i'm new to this.
perhaps its time to talk to a mental health care professional- Hide quoted text -
- Show quoted text -
Hi,
I'm familiar with much of what you post here. Depression is not
uncommon amongst we adopted children. My birth mother also suffers
with depression, though it was not documented - I only found out when
i actually met her, 8 years ago. I'm still not clear whether the
cause of the depression is physical, as the fact that mother and
daughter both have it would suggest, or psychological, as we both have
our individual environmental reasons for our illnesses.
Please feel encouraged to seek medical advice. Good luck.
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| User: "Contrarian" |
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| Title: Re: not happy. |
16 Dec 2007 12:51:05 PM |
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wrote:
I don't know whether or not I have serious depression but I am 21 year
old girl who dropped out of university because the pressure was too
much....
I have reoccuring
thoughts of suicide and find myself researching everything I can about
it, watching movies..
lost a lot of weight.
I think that if I had a serious mental disorder my parents would've
told me since I am adopted and they have all my paperwork.
I don't think there would have been any way they could
know that you might become depressed years down the road.
Depression is more serious when it's untreated. You've described
some classic symptoms, but no one can make a diagnosis on a NG.
You need to see a MD in any case, given the weight loss.
I don't know where you are, or how you would find professional
treatment given your finances, but I suggest you try.
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