| Topic: |
Sociology > Depression |
| User: |
"spy vs spy" |
| Date: |
27 Nov 2006 08:19:18 PM |
| Object: |
One month since my Father died. |
And each day gets a bit worse. I'm so sad most of the time. I'm
overwhelmed by the tiny things of life.
My car needed a new headlight and you would have thought I needed to repair
the space shuttle.
It took me a week to just drive it 0.3 miles down the road to the gas
station.
I have to keep myself grounded and sane. My daughter needs me. She is only
three.
I got a call from her daycare today. She had a temp of 100.6 (cut off for
calling the parent is over 100.5)
By the time I got there and got her home her temp was 102. There is strep
going around in the center, so I'm taking her in tomorrow to her doctor for
a culture.
I put a call into my p-doc for an appointment. I need to have a med boost.
Is it supposed to get worse before it gets better?
I know he was old. I know he was sick. For the last few months of his life
he was hardly ever awake. But the loss still feels sudden.
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| User: "used2be" |
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| Title: Re: One month since my Father died. |
27 Nov 2006 08:58:59 PM |
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"spy vs spy" <spyvsspy@mad.com> wrote in message
news:G0Nah.15671$w37.6718@trnddc08...
And each day gets a bit worse. I'm so sad most of the time. I'm
overwhelmed by the tiny things of life.
My car needed a new headlight and you would have thought I needed to
repair the space shuttle.
It took me a week to just drive it 0.3 miles down the road to the gas
station.
I have to keep myself grounded and sane. My daughter needs me. She is
only three.
I got a call from her daycare today. She had a temp of 100.6 (cut off for
calling the parent is over 100.5)
By the time I got there and got her home her temp was 102. There is strep
going around in the center, so I'm taking her in tomorrow to her doctor
for a culture.
I put a call into my p-doc for an appointment. I need to have a med
boost.
Is it supposed to get worse before it gets better?
I know he was old. I know he was sick. For the last few months of his
life he was hardly ever awake. But the loss still feels sudden.
my best friend lost her father this year as well and it's been so tough on
her. it breaks my heart to see her going through all these first holidays
and birthdays without him. i know it's just a matter of time, but it sure
is tough.
hang in there hun....i'm thinkin of you!
~u2b
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| User: "spy vs spy" |
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| Title: Re: One month since my Father died. |
28 Nov 2006 02:47:07 AM |
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"used2be" <used2be@nowhere.com> wrote in message
news:TBNah.4270$_H5.3935@tornado.texas.rr.com...
"spy vs spy" <spyvsspy@mad.com> wrote in message
news:G0Nah.15671$w37.6718@trnddc08...
And each day gets a bit worse. I'm so sad most of the time. I'm
overwhelmed by the tiny things of life.
My car needed a new headlight and you would have thought I needed to
repair the space shuttle.
It took me a week to just drive it 0.3 miles down the road to the gas
station.
I have to keep myself grounded and sane. My daughter needs me. She is
only three.
I got a call from her daycare today. She had a temp of 100.6 (cut off
for calling the parent is over 100.5)
By the time I got there and got her home her temp was 102. There is
strep going around in the center, so I'm taking her in tomorrow to her
doctor for a culture.
I put a call into my p-doc for an appointment. I need to have a med
boost.
Is it supposed to get worse before it gets better?
I know he was old. I know he was sick. For the last few months of his
life he was hardly ever awake. But the loss still feels sudden.
my best friend lost her father this year as well and it's been so tough on
her. it breaks my heart to see her going through all these first holidays
and birthdays without him. i know it's just a matter of time, but it sure
is tough.
hang in there hun....i'm thinkin of you!
~u2b
Thanks. I know that the pain might never go away. I just have to find a
way to live with it.
.
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| User: "Contrarian" |
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| Title: Re: One month since my Father died. |
29 Nov 2006 10:03:53 PM |
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spy vs spy <spyvsspy@mad.com> wrote:
And each day gets a bit worse. I'm so sad most of the time. I'm
overwhelmed by the tiny things of life.
My car needed a new headlight and you would have thought I needed to repair
the space shuttle.
Yes, that's what it's like. The unexpected things can
hurt the most, seeing something they would like and
then remembering... and losing track of where you are
and why you went there (mundane things like pizza shops)
I know he was old. I know he was sick. For the last few months of his life
he was hardly ever awake. But the loss still feels sudden.
Yes, my sympathies are with you.
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| User: "%" |
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| Title: Re: One month since my Father died. |
29 Nov 2006 10:21:28 PM |
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"Contrarian" <adrba65@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:JKsbh.8510$lq.6240@newsread1.mlpsca01.us.to.verio.net...
spy vs spy <spyvsspy@mad.com> wrote:
And each day gets a bit worse. I'm so sad most of the time. I'm
overwhelmed by the tiny things of life.
My car needed a new headlight and you would have thought I needed to
repair
the space shuttle.
Yes, that's what it's like. The unexpected things can
hurt the most, seeing something they would like and
then remembering... and losing track of where you are
and why you went there (mundane things like pizza shops)
I know he was old. I know he was sick. For the last few months of his
life
he was hardly ever awake. But the loss still feels sudden.
Yes, my sympathies are with you.
mine did the same thing 9 years ago ,
you know the it gets better part ,
this is one of those times that it don't ,
but for his sake , i press on
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| User: "GlennT" |
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| Title: Re: One month since my Father died. |
30 Nov 2006 05:17:09 AM |
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% wrote:
mine did the same thing 9 years ago ,
you know the it gets better part ,
this is one of those times that it don't ,
but for his sake , i press on
In the name of the father. Sometimes 'maledom' is pretty well
misunderstood by those that simply can't handle the truth.
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| User: "GlennT" |
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| Title: Re: One month since my Father died. |
28 Nov 2006 05:25:03 AM |
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spy vs spy wrote:
And each day gets a bit worse. I'm so sad most of the time. I'm
overwhelmed by the tiny things of life.
My car needed a new headlight and you would have thought I needed to repair
the space shuttle.
It took me a week to just drive it 0.3 miles down the road to the gas
station.
I have to keep myself grounded and sane. My daughter needs me. She is only
three.
I got a call from her daycare today. She had a temp of 100.6 (cut off for
calling the parent is over 100.5)
By the time I got there and got her home her temp was 102. There is strep
going around in the center, so I'm taking her in tomorrow to her doctor for
a culture.
I put a call into my p-doc for an appointment. I need to have a med boost.
Is it supposed to get worse before it gets better?
I know he was old. I know he was sick. For the last few months of his life
he was hardly ever awake. But the loss still feels sudden.
Father is not a position like Accountant or Surgeon. It is loaded with
meaning stored genetically. There is no real sense to it. Unless you
decide to try and make sense of it.
I am sorry for your loss.
No matter how bad things get there is still an itinery of things needed
to be done. This little fact has comforted me in my worst moments. It
reminds me that I am still alive.
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| User: "spy vs spy" |
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| Title: Re: One month since my Father died. |
28 Nov 2006 06:21:29 AM |
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"GlennT" <trucage@xtra.co.nz> wrote in message
news:1164713103.143796.241340@80g2000cwy.googlegroups.com...
spy vs spy wrote:
And each day gets a bit worse. I'm so sad most of the time. I'm
overwhelmed by the tiny things of life.
My car needed a new headlight and you would have thought I needed to
repair
the space shuttle.
It took me a week to just drive it 0.3 miles down the road to the gas
station.
I have to keep myself grounded and sane. My daughter needs me. She is
only
three.
I got a call from her daycare today. She had a temp of 100.6 (cut off
for
calling the parent is over 100.5)
By the time I got there and got her home her temp was 102. There is
strep
going around in the center, so I'm taking her in tomorrow to her doctor
for
a culture.
I put a call into my p-doc for an appointment. I need to have a med
boost.
Is it supposed to get worse before it gets better?
I know he was old. I know he was sick. For the last few months of his
life
he was hardly ever awake. But the loss still feels sudden.
Father is not a position like Accountant or Surgeon. It is loaded with
meaning stored genetically. There is no real sense to it. Unless you
decide to try and make sense of it.
I am sorry for your loss.
No matter how bad things get there is still an itinery of things needed
to be done. This little fact has comforted me in my worst moments. It
reminds me that I am still alive.
Caring for my daughter keeps me grounded. Helping her with an Elmo puzzle.
Signing the ABC song, and just the day to day
things I have to do with is what reminds me that I am still alive.
Thanks for your words. They are so very true.
.
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| User: "GlennT" |
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| Title: Re: One month since my Father died. |
30 Nov 2006 05:14:52 AM |
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spy vs spy wrote:
"GlennT" <trucage@xtra.co.nz> wrote in message
news:1164713103.143796.241340@80g2000cwy.googlegroups.com...
spy vs spy wrote:
And each day gets a bit worse. I'm so sad most of the time. I'm
overwhelmed by the tiny things of life.
My car needed a new headlight and you would have thought I needed to
repair
the space shuttle.
It took me a week to just drive it 0.3 miles down the road to the gas
station.
I have to keep myself grounded and sane. My daughter needs me. She is
only
three.
I got a call from her daycare today. She had a temp of 100.6 (cut off
for
calling the parent is over 100.5)
By the time I got there and got her home her temp was 102. There is
strep
going around in the center, so I'm taking her in tomorrow to her doctor
for
a culture.
I put a call into my p-doc for an appointment. I need to have a med
boost.
Is it supposed to get worse before it gets better?
I know he was old. I know he was sick. For the last few months of his
life
he was hardly ever awake. But the loss still feels sudden.
Father is not a position like Accountant or Surgeon. It is loaded with
meaning stored genetically. There is no real sense to it. Unless you
decide to try and make sense of it.
I am sorry for your loss.
No matter how bad things get there is still an itinery of things needed
to be done. This little fact has comforted me in my worst moments. It
reminds me that I am still alive.
Caring for my daughter keeps me grounded. Helping her with an Elmo puzzle.
Signing the ABC song, and just the day to day
things I have to do with is what reminds me that I am still alive.
Thanks for your words. They are so very true.
Thank you for reminding me they are true. Is your daughter deaf? Just
wondering about the "signing" part.
I tend to think it is our worries and concerns that can bring out both
the best and worst in us. When it is our children and our responses are
considered, it is almost always the best.
I love my children more than anything else. That to me is as simple as
good fathering can be. I so want to be a good father.
.
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| User: "Brianversion" |
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| Title: Re: One month since my Father died. |
28 Nov 2006 10:37:01 AM |
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spy vs spy wrote:
And each day gets a bit worse. I'm so sad most of the time. I'm
overwhelmed by the tiny things of life.
My car needed a new headlight and you would have thought I needed to repair
the space shuttle.
It took me a week to just drive it 0.3 miles down the road to the gas
station.
I have to keep myself grounded and sane. My daughter needs me. She is only
three.
I got a call from her daycare today. She had a temp of 100.6 (cut off for
calling the parent is over 100.5)
By the time I got there and got her home her temp was 102. There is strep
going around in the center, so I'm taking her in tomorrow to her doctor for
a culture.
I put a call into my p-doc for an appointment. I need to have a med boost.
Is it supposed to get worse before it gets better?
I know he was old. I know he was sick. For the last few months of his life
he was hardly ever awake. But the loss still feels sudden.
It sucks. Mine died in March. I know he was old, and sick too. But
that's not what I remember. My sister got 18 of us together in my
living room before the meal thanksgiving. She read a card and handed
it out, "Merry Christmas from Heaven". So after it was done and they
were all sobbing, I said, "yeah, I miss the old man saying to mommy,
"gee, this turkey is a little dry...where'd ya buy it?" as if he knew
where to buy a moist turkey. Then we laughed and said, "let's eat!"
Believe me, it will get better, but it gets a little worse first.
Brian
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| User: "Gayle" |
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| Title: Re: One month since my Father died. |
28 Nov 2006 06:44:54 AM |
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spy vs spy wrote:
Is it supposed to get worse before it gets better?
I know he was old. I know he was sick. For the last few months of his life
he was hardly ever awake. But the loss still feels sudden.
In my experience, it's possible to be
somewhat prepared, emotionally, for the
death itself if there's time. But it
isn't possible to prepare for the
feeling of loss itself. If that makes
sense. It did get worse for me before it
got better. The idea of 'gone forever'
starts to sink in. Coping with that
takes as long as it takes. My advice is
to not fight with your grief by thinking
you should feel 'better' or worrying how
long it will take. The first year is a
roller coaster -- or it was for me in
several losses. One step at a time is
the best you can do.
Gayle
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