| Topic: |
Sociology > Depression |
| User: |
"Used2Be" |
| Date: |
12 Dec 2003 10:38:26 PM |
| Object: |
really rotten day :-( |
The last 24 hours have really sucked and I just want to vent and/or whine a
little. Thanks in advance to anyone who bothers to read this.
It started last night at my preschool's Xmas program. I am the music
teacher at the preschool (and my 4 yo goes there as well), and our big
program was last night and I was anxious about it, yet excited at the same
time. The kids were adorable and couldn't wait to show off for their
parents. It was a big night for me as well since I was responsible for the
whole event. Parents and grandparents and relatives and neighbors were all
there to see our these little ones perform. Shortly before the performance
began, I was with some parents and teachers in a classroom putting together
last minute details when my husband felt the need to chastise me in front of
them all. I was embarrassed, flustered and terribly hurt. I couldn't
believe he would berate me in front of these people on a night that was so
extremely important to me. I couldn't "fight back" under those
circumstances so I just responded to him as calmly as I could so he would go
back to what he was doing (filming the program). It flustered me for the
whole night though and put a damper on my evening. Afterwards, when the
children were visiting "Mr and Mrs Claus" (an elderly couple at our church
who so sweetly volunteered for the job), I told my DH that he had really
hurt my feelings and embarrassed me when he chastised me that way in front
of the parents and my fellow teachers. Instead of apologizing, he proceeded
to loudly chastise me further for the same thing all over again! I was
mortified beyond words. I'm still shocked at how he acted. He didn't used
to be this way, but lately he's seemed intent on hurting me and I can't
figure out why. So needless to say, he ruined a night that was supposed to
be really special and exciting for me. I was able to fake it and keep a
smile pasted on for most of the night, but there were several times that
tears came and I had to bite them back, or step aside for a moment and wipe
them away. It just hurt so much that he'd embarrass me that way on that
particular night. I cried most of the night and so I slept lousily. Then
to top it all off, I was supposed to get up this morning and travel alone to
Dallas to spend the weekend with my very best friend. We've been planning
it for months as a celebration of her 40th birthday. This was to be our
first chance in 13 years to have a weekend together without kids. Her DH
never would "allow" her to leave the kids with him before, so this was
really momentous that he was letting her leave her 3 boys behind with him
for the weekend. Oh, how excited we were. She's been my best friend for 21
years, and she is truly my soul mate. When no one else sticks by me, she
does. Always has. And when my depressions are horrendous, she's my biggest
support. And when I attempted suicide, she was my biggest lifeline back to
"the land of the living." I couldn't manage without her even though she now
lives 10 hours away from me. We speak or email every day. She's closer
than a sister to me and I love her 2nd only to my family. So you can
imagine how excited we were to have this weekend to shop and play without
kids. And I needed to get away from DH for the weekend because he's been
such a jerk lately. Well, you guessed it. The plans fell thru. I was
dressed and packing to leave this morning when she called me in tears saying
her 13 yo had woken up with the flu, and so she could not come. Her DH had
begun a new position at work this week and could not leave to come home to
be with their son, so we had to call the whole thing off. We both cried on
the phone for an hour. And I've cried this whole stupid day. Most of last
night too, because of DH. To say it's been a bad day is an understatement!
Now, I realize that this all seems pretty trivial to alot of folks, and that
it's not the end of the world, and that it was silly to get so upset. Sure,
I know that. But none of that makes the pain any less, or the
disappointment any smaller. I'm devastated and heartbroken, and that's just
the way it is. I know that my depression makes me more sensitive to
disappointments and getting my feelings hurt, but I know I'd have still been
upset even if it weren't for the depression. It's just been an awfully
trying and tiring 24 hours and I still feel so very, very sad. I could be
having fun in Dallas with my bestest buddy, and I could be escaping my
sadness for 48 hours, but instead I'm trapped here feeling sadder than ever.
:-( And not escaping at all. *sigh*
Thanks for letting me vent.
used2be
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| User: "% surfs@uniserve" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
12 Dec 2003 10:45:01 PM |
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"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message
news:6JwCb.211375$do1.2833@twister.austin.rr.com...
The last 24 hours have really sucked and I just want to vent and/or whine
a
little. Thanks in advance to anyone who bothers to read this.
It started last night at my preschool's Xmas program. I am the music
teacher at the preschool (and my 4 yo goes there as well), and our big
program was last night and I was anxious about it, yet excited at the same
time. The kids were adorable and couldn't wait to show off for their
parents. It was a big night for me as well since I was responsible for
the
whole event. Parents and grandparents and relatives and neighbors were
all
there to see our these little ones perform. Shortly before the
performance
began, I was with some parents and teachers in a classroom putting
together
last minute details when my husband felt the need to chastise me in front
of
them all. I was embarrassed, flustered and terribly hurt. I couldn't
believe he would berate me in front of these people on a night that was so
extremely important to me. I couldn't "fight back" under those
circumstances so I just responded to him as calmly as I could so he would
go
back to what he was doing (filming the program). It flustered me for the
whole night though and put a damper on my evening. Afterwards, when the
children were visiting "Mr and Mrs Claus" (an elderly couple at our church
who so sweetly volunteered for the job), I told my DH that he had really
hurt my feelings and embarrassed me when he chastised me that way in front
of the parents and my fellow teachers. Instead of apologizing, he
proceeded
to loudly chastise me further for the same thing all over again! I was
mortified beyond words. I'm still shocked at how he acted. He didn't
used
to be this way, but lately he's seemed intent on hurting me and I can't
figure out why. So needless to say, he ruined a night that was supposed
to
be really special and exciting for me. I was able to fake it and keep a
smile pasted on for most of the night, but there were several times that
tears came and I had to bite them back, or step aside for a moment and
wipe
them away. It just hurt so much that he'd embarrass me that way on that
particular night. I cried most of the night and so I slept lousily. Then
to top it all off, I was supposed to get up this morning and travel alone
to
Dallas to spend the weekend with my very best friend. We've been planning
it for months as a celebration of her 40th birthday. This was to be our
first chance in 13 years to have a weekend together without kids. Her DH
never would "allow" her to leave the kids with him before, so this was
really momentous that he was letting her leave her 3 boys behind with him
for the weekend. Oh, how excited we were. She's been my best friend for
21
years, and she is truly my soul mate. When no one else sticks by me, she
does. Always has. And when my depressions are horrendous, she's my
biggest
support. And when I attempted suicide, she was my biggest lifeline back
to
"the land of the living." I couldn't manage without her even though she
now
lives 10 hours away from me. We speak or email every day. She's closer
than a sister to me and I love her 2nd only to my family. So you can
imagine how excited we were to have this weekend to shop and play without
kids. And I needed to get away from DH for the weekend because he's been
such a jerk lately. Well, you guessed it. The plans fell thru. I was
dressed and packing to leave this morning when she called me in tears
saying
her 13 yo had woken up with the flu, and so she could not come. Her DH
had
begun a new position at work this week and could not leave to come home to
be with their son, so we had to call the whole thing off. We both cried
on
the phone for an hour. And I've cried this whole stupid day. Most of
last
night too, because of DH. To say it's been a bad day is an
understatement!
Now, I realize that this all seems pretty trivial to alot of folks, and
that
it's not the end of the world, and that it was silly to get so upset.
Sure,
I know that. But none of that makes the pain any less, or the
disappointment any smaller. I'm devastated and heartbroken, and that's
just
the way it is. I know that my depression makes me more sensitive to
disappointments and getting my feelings hurt, but I know I'd have still
been
upset even if it weren't for the depression. It's just been an awfully
trying and tiring 24 hours and I still feel so very, very sad. I could be
having fun in Dallas with my bestest buddy, and I could be escaping my
sadness for 48 hours, but instead I'm trapped here feeling sadder than
ever.
:-( And not escaping at all. *sigh*
Thanks for letting me vent.
used2be
i am like so moved
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| User: "" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 07:16:20 AM |
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On Fri, 12 Dec 2003 "Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com>
wrote in message
<(((*> news:6JwCb.211375$do1.2833@twister.austin.rr.com...
<(((*> > The last 24 hours have really sucked and I just want to vent and/or whine
<(((*> a
<(((*> > little. Thanks in advance to anyone who bothers to read this.
(Sorry. I had to cut & paste from Dave's response because your
original post didn't make it to my news server yet.)
While I was reading your post it reminded me of something that
happened to me once.
I had done an interview with one of our VPs, written it up for
our newsletter, and the newsletter had just come out and people
were coming out of the woodwork everywhere to tell me how great
the interview was.
And that same morning, that same VP's secretary called me to make
a (rather nasty) complaint about something quite different that I
was also responsible for.
I was in tears after I got off the phone with her. Yet my
interview made her boss look really good, and she would get a lot
of benefit from that.
Later I realized that she was jealous and feeling threatened by
me. So she took it out on me by attacking me with an unrelated
complaint.
So, let's look at your experience from that perspective.
Hhere you are, the centre of attention, competent, busy,
successfully managing an important activity.
And DH is jealous of you. Maybe he feels threatened because of
your competence and success.
What does he do? Attack you in front of the people who are most
impressed with you, trying to make you look less accomplished,
less successful.
Says a lot more to me about *his* insecurities and weaknesses
than it does about you. And I'll bet other people saw it that way
too. I hope they will tell you that when they see you next.
(I bet your friend could look at her situation in a similar
light, and it would make more sense how your plans unravelled.)
Tara J. Ballance
Montreal, Canada
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| User: "Used2Be" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 11:34:12 AM |
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<thehouse@pooh.corner> wrote in message
(Sorry. I had to cut & paste from Dave's response because your
original post didn't make it to my news server yet.)
Well, at least Dave is good for something! (still feeling miffed at %)
Continuing on...
While I was reading your post it reminded me of something that
happened to me once.
I had done an interview with one of our VPs, written it up for
our newsletter, and the newsletter had just come out and people
were coming out of the woodwork everywhere to tell me how great
the interview was. And that same morning, that same VP's secretary called
me to make
a (rather nasty) complaint about something quite different that I
was also responsible for. I was in tears after I got off the phone with
her. Yet my
interview made her boss look really good, and she would get a lot
of benefit from that.
Later I realized that she was jealous and feeling threatened by
me. So she took it out on me by attacking me with an unrelated
complaint.
I'm sure you are right, but I bet it still hurt. But you were smart to look
at it logically once your feelings were dealt with.
So, let's look at your experience from that perspective. Hhere you are,
the centre of >attention, competent, busy, successfully managing an
important activity. And DH is jealous of >you. Maybe he feels threatened
because of your competence and success. What does he do? >Attack you in
front of the people who are most impressed with you, trying to make you look
less accomplished, less successful.
I'd had these same thoughts yet can't figure out why he'd be jealous. He's
never been jealous of me at all. I can't figure out what's suddenly
changed.
Says a lot more to me about *his* insecurities and weaknesses
than it does about you. And I'll bet other people saw it that way
too. I hope they will tell you that when they see you next.
I hope so. Thank you so much for your comments, Tara. You helped me to see
it through another person's eyes.
((((Tara))))
u2b
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| User: "alvintchase" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 10:25:22 AM |
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"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message news:<6JwCb.211375$do1.2833@twister.austin.rr.com>...
I'm sorry you had such a hard day...I hope today is much better!
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| User: "Used2Be" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 11:34:50 AM |
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"alvintchase" <relayer211@yahoo.com> wrote in message
I'm sorry you had such a hard day...I hope today is much better!
Thanks Alvin. I really do appreciate that.
u2b
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| User: "Trishamolson" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 10:42:53 AM |
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Dear Used2Be,
I felt so bad for you reading your post. I hope you and your best friend can
make plans anew for a visit? At some point I hope you give your mate a piece of
your mind!
Best
Rosena
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| User: "Used2Be" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 11:38:58 AM |
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"Trishamolson" wrote
Dear Used2Be,
I felt so bad for you reading your post. I hope you and your best friend
can
make plans anew for a visit? At some point I hope you give your mate a
piece of
your mind!
Best
Rosena
Thanks Rosena. It's comforting just to know some folks even bothered to
read my rant, much less respond. :-)
My friend and I are tentatively shooting for the beginning of February now.
She's a CPA and January is one of her busiest months, so we've got to wait
til then now. I hope it doesn't fall through again. :( I'm gonna try hard
not to get my hopes up next time.
My DH did apologize yesterday. I had to wonder though if he only apologized
because I was so upset about my plans with my best friend falling through.
But regardless of the reasons behind it, it was nice to get an apology. He
hugged me and let me cry for awhile which was kinda nice too. He doesn't do
that so much anymore. But we've been married nearly 19 years so I guess
that's only natural. <sigh>
Thanks to everyone who responded. You guys are great!!!
u2b
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| User: "Kim " |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 11:03:17 PM |
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I am really sorry to hear how everything seemed to go sour for you. I really
hope things look up for you. I know how depression can really take that hold
onto you. I hope you can see your friend soon.
Kim
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| User: "Used2Be" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
14 Dec 2003 12:57:37 PM |
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"Kim " <kthompson1013@aol.com> wrote in message
news:20031214000317.14243.00001003@mb-m28.aol.com...
I am really sorry to hear how everything seemed to go sour for you. I
really
hope things look up for you. I know how depression can really take that
hold
onto you. I hope you can see your friend soon.
Kim
Thanks Kim. :)
u2b
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| User: "Whiskers" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
14 Dec 2003 07:59:59 PM |
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On Sat, 13 Dec 2003 04:38:26 +0000, "Used2Be"
<cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote:
snip
I could be having fun in Dallas with
my bestest buddy, and I could be escaping my sadness for 48 hours, but
instead I'm trapped here feeling sadder than ever.
:-( And not escaping at all. *sigh*
I hope you manage to look forward to the time when you will meet up. Soon!
--
-- ^^^^^^^^^^ Interested in Citroens?
-- Whiskers <http://www.aacit.net>
-- ~~~~~~~~~~ <news:alt.autos.citroen>
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| User: "wombn" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 02:41:02 AM |
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On Sat, 13 Dec 2003 04:38:26 GMT, "Used2Be"
<cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote:
night too, because of DH. To say it's been a bad day is an understatement!
Boy, I'll say!!
I know that my depression makes me more sensitive to
disappointments and getting my feelings hurt, but I know I'd have still been
upset even if it weren't for the depression.
The only part of your reaction that sounds like depression to me is
that it's taking you longer to bounce back that you would without the
depression.
--
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If laughter is the best medicine,
then kittens should be covered by our health insurance. :-)
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| User: "kerfoker" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 02:59:07 PM |
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That sounds like a lousy 24 hours, Used2Be. I hope the days get
better since and you'll have another opportunity to visit with
your friend soon.
-Fred
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| User: "Used2Be" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
14 Dec 2003 12:57:20 PM |
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"kerfoker" <kerfoker@ix.netcom.com> wrote in message
news:3FDB7DB6.6CE@ix.netcom.com...
That sounds like a lousy 24 hours, Used2Be. I hope the days get
better since and you'll have another opportunity to visit with
your friend soon.
-Fred
Thanks Fred. :)
u2b
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| User: "Used2Be" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
12 Dec 2003 11:30:15 PM |
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message blocking is such a nice tool. not only does it block any sender i
wish for it to block, but it also removes all previous messages from that
particular sender so that i no longer have to view them anymore.
*pouf*
% has now become blocked on my newsreader.
now that's something in this terribly bad day that i have some control over
and it feels d*mn good.
percentless,
u2b
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| User: "% surfs@uniserve" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
12 Dec 2003 11:40:11 PM |
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"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message
news:HtxCb.212402$do1.174450@twister.austin.rr.com...
message blocking is such a nice tool. not only does it block any sender i
wish for it to block, but it also removes all previous messages from that
particular sender so that i no longer have to view them anymore.
*pouf*
% has now become blocked on my newsreader.
now that's something in this terribly bad day that i have some control
over
and it feels d*mn good.
percentless,
u2b
oh the freakin pain of it ,
blocked by someone i never talk to ,
well lemme tell ya how much that hurts
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| User: "Dr. Siddhartha Vicious" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
12 Dec 2003 11:01:46 PM |
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x-no-archive:yes
"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message
news:6JwCb.211375$do1.2833@twister.austin.rr.com...
The last 24 hours have really sucked and I just want to vent and/or whine
a
little. Thanks in advance to anyone who bothers to read this.
I've had my own crappy evening. After my son showed off his increasingly
long xmas list, my wife suggested he mark those items that were most
important to him. So I made this joke that if he marked them all Santa would
send him coal and switches; I have a rather oddball sense of humor, but he's
nearly 8 and should know by now what I'm like. Next thing I know he's crying
and my wife's in my face about hurting his feelings. I had to leave before I
punched a fucking hole in one of the walls. It tears me up inside that I
can't be me w/o causing harm. Screw it. I'll just go back to hanging out
quietly in a corner somewhere. I do much less damage that way.
--
??? www.ourfuture.org
?W? www.moveon.org
??? www.questionw.com
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| User: "Used2Be" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
12 Dec 2003 11:33:25 PM |
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"Dr. Siddhartha Vicious" <bokonon@ptsi.net> wrote in message
news:bre61u$29qh5$1@ID-72596.news.uni-berlin.de...
x-no-archive:yes
"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message
news:6JwCb.211375$do1.2833@twister.austin.rr.com...
The last 24 hours have really sucked and I just want to vent and/or
whine
a
little. Thanks in advance to anyone who bothers to read this.
I've had my own crappy evening. After my son showed off his increasingly
long xmas list, my wife suggested he mark those items that were most
important to him. So I made this joke that if he marked them all Santa
would
send him coal and switches; I have a rather oddball sense of humor, but
he's
nearly 8 and should know by now what I'm like. Next thing I know he's
crying
and my wife's in my face about hurting his feelings. I had to leave before
I
punched a fucking hole in one of the walls. It tears me up inside that I
can't be me w/o causing harm. Screw it. I'll just go back to hanging out
quietly in a corner somewhere. I do much less damage that way.
sorry. didn't mean to make you feel worse.
:-(((((
u2b
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| User: "% surfs@uniserve" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
12 Dec 2003 11:40:46 PM |
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"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message
news:FwxCb.212466$do1.98882@twister.austin.rr.com...
"Dr. Siddhartha Vicious" <bokonon@ptsi.net> wrote in message
news:bre61u$29qh5$1@ID-72596.news.uni-berlin.de...
x-no-archive:yes
"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message
news:6JwCb.211375$do1.2833@twister.austin.rr.com...
The last 24 hours have really sucked and I just want to vent and/or
whine
a
little. Thanks in advance to anyone who bothers to read this.
I've had my own crappy evening. After my son showed off his increasingly
long xmas list, my wife suggested he mark those items that were most
important to him. So I made this joke that if he marked them all Santa
would
send him coal and switches; I have a rather oddball sense of humor, but
he's
nearly 8 and should know by now what I'm like. Next thing I know he's
crying
and my wife's in my face about hurting his feelings. I had to leave
before
I
punched a fucking hole in one of the walls. It tears me up inside that I
can't be me w/o causing harm. Screw it. I'll just go back to hanging out
quietly in a corner somewhere. I do much less damage that way.
sorry. didn't mean to make you feel worse.
:-(((((
u2b
maybe you should block yourself
.
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| User: "alvintchase" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 11:05:33 AM |
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"Dr. Siddhartha Vicious" <bokonon@ptsi.net> wrote in message
news:bre61u$29qh5$1@ID-72596.news.uni-berlin.de...
x-no-archive:yes
Sid,I don't think you should change your sense of humor.On April
Fool's Day,I like to give people fake scratch off tickets where they
think they win $500 or $5,000 or something like that.some people think
it's funny,some people get upset and think it's mean,but it's a joke(I
should probably limit that joke to April Fools Day however,which I
haven't always done)...but my theory is that there is just NO GETTING
THROUGH THIS WORLD if you can't laugh.If you don't have a sense of
humor,and you can't laugh at yourself and the craziness of the
world,you might as well just shoot yourself.(I'm speaking
figuritivly,not literally).humor is literally a life saver...
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| User: "Dr. Siddhartha Vicious" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
12 Dec 2003 11:54:15 PM |
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x-no-archive:yes
"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message
news:FwxCb.212466$do1.98882@twister.austin.rr.com...
"Dr. Siddhartha Vicious" <bokonon@ptsi.net> wrote in message
news:bre61u$29qh5$1@ID-72596.news.uni-berlin.de...
x-no-archive:yes
"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message
news:6JwCb.211375$do1.2833@twister.austin.rr.com...
The last 24 hours have really sucked and I just want to vent and/or
whine
a
little. Thanks in advance to anyone who bothers to read this.
I've had my own crappy evening. After my son showed off his increasingly
long xmas list, my wife suggested he mark those items that were most
important to him. So I made this joke that if he marked them all Santa
would
send him coal and switches; I have a rather oddball sense of humor, but
he's
nearly 8 and should know by now what I'm like. Next thing I know he's
crying
and my wife's in my face about hurting his feelings. I had to leave
before
I
punched a fucking hole in one of the walls. It tears me up inside that I
can't be me w/o causing harm. Screw it. I'll just go back to hanging out
quietly in a corner somewhere. I do much less damage that way.
sorry. didn't mean to make you feel worse.
:-(((((
u2b
Nah, you didn't do anything wrong. If anything, I found some
comfort...something you said resonated with me and made the shitty stuff I'm
dealing with seem a bit more bearable.
--
??? www.ourfuture.org
?W? www.moveon.org
??? www.questionw.com
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| User: "Used2Be" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 11:02:18 AM |
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"Dr. Siddhartha Vicious" wrote
x-no-archive:yes
"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message
news:FwxCb.212466$do1.98882@twister.austin.rr.com...
sorry. didn't mean to make you feel worse.
:-(((((
u2b
Nah, you didn't do anything wrong. If anything, I found some
comfort...something you said resonated with me and made the shitty stuff
I'm
dealing with seem a bit more bearable.
Christmas does make depression harder to deal with for sure. I'm glad you
found a tiny bit of comfort in knowing others feel your pain.
Hugs,
u2b
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| User: "Rebecca Jo" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
14 Dec 2003 11:22:52 PM |
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x-no-archive: yes
"Dr. Siddhartha Vicious" <bokonon@ptsi.net> wrote:
I've had my own crappy evening. After my son showed off his increasingly
long xmas list, my wife suggested he mark those items that were most
important to him. So I made this joke that if he marked them all Santa
would
send him coal and switches; I have a rather oddball sense of humor, but
he's
nearly 8 and should know by now what I'm like. Next thing I know he's
crying
and my wife's in my face about hurting his feelings. I had to leave before
I
punched a fucking hole in one of the walls. It tears me up inside that I
can't be me w/o causing harm. Screw it. I'll just go back to hanging out
quietly in a corner somewhere. I do much less damage that way.
maybe try to explain to him that you were just joking? he probably won't
understand it until he's older. I've had to get used to my father's sense of
humour. I still don't think the things he says are funny but I understand
now that he's not trying to be mean, he really thinks it's hysterical. My
sense of humour is wonky as is. Sorry that happened though, that would suck.
??? www.ourfuture.org
?W? www.moveon.org
??? www.questionw.com
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| User: "Janithor" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
12 Dec 2003 11:13:35 PM |
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x-no-archive: yes
Dr. Siddhartha Vicious wrote:
x-no-archive:yes
"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message
news:6JwCb.211375$do1.2833@twister.austin.rr.com...
The last 24 hours have really sucked and I just want to vent and/or whine
a
little. Thanks in advance to anyone who bothers to read this.
I've had my own crappy evening. After my son showed off his increasingly
long xmas list, my wife suggested he mark those items that were most
important to him. So I made this joke that if he marked them all Santa would
send him coal and switches; I have a rather oddball sense of humor, but he's
nearly 8 and should know by now what I'm like. Next thing I know he's crying
and my wife's in my face about hurting his feelings. I had to leave before I
punched a fucking hole in one of the walls. It tears me up inside that I
can't be me w/o causing harm. Screw it. I'll just go back to hanging out
quietly in a corner somewhere. I do much less damage that way.
Damn. I could see myself doing this if I had a kid. Maybe you can find
a way to turn it around? You weren't deliberately being mean to the
kid, there's a big difference. He just didn't get your angle, for
whatever reason. Seems like something you could save with a quick
apology and some goofball humor.
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| User: "Dr. Siddhartha Vicious" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 12:02:16 AM |
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x-no-archive:yes
"Janithor" <Janithor@comcast.net> wrote in message
news:3FDA9FFE.70705@comcast.net...
x-no-archive: yes
Dr. Siddhartha Vicious wrote:
x-no-archive:yes
"Used2Be" <cindyb@ERASETHISaustin.rr.com> wrote in message
news:6JwCb.211375$do1.2833@twister.austin.rr.com...
The last 24 hours have really sucked and I just want to vent and/or
whine
a
little. Thanks in advance to anyone who bothers to read this.
I've had my own crappy evening. After my son showed off his increasingly
long xmas list, my wife suggested he mark those items that were most
important to him. So I made this joke that if he marked them all Santa
would
send him coal and switches; I have a rather oddball sense of humor, but
he's
nearly 8 and should know by now what I'm like. Next thing I know he's
crying
and my wife's in my face about hurting his feelings. I had to leave
before I
punched a fucking hole in one of the walls. It tears me up inside that I
can't be me w/o causing harm. Screw it. I'll just go back to hanging out
quietly in a corner somewhere. I do much less damage that way.
Damn. I could see myself doing this if I had a kid. Maybe you can find
a way to turn it around? You weren't deliberately being mean to the
kid, there's a big difference. He just didn't get your angle, for
whatever reason. Seems like something you could save with a quick
apology and some goofball humor.
I'll see what kind of damage control I can come up with in the morning. He
has a lot of Melia's temperament...her tolerance for goofball humor is
pretty low as well. I come across in real life a bit like a combo of Steve
Wright, George Carlin, Dennis Miller & Michael Moore. In other words: a bit
obnoxious. I'll keep working with the boy; hopefully he'll one day grasp
that his dad is just a big old obnoxious goof who sees humor in things that
most of the planet cannot quite see, and is mostly quite harmless.
--
??? www.ourfuture.org
?W? www.moveon.org
??? www.questionw.com
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| User: "" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 07:02:22 AM |
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x-no-archive:yes
On Fri, 12 Dec 2003 23:01:46 -0600, "Dr. Siddhartha Vicious"
<bokonon@ptsi.net> wrote:
<(((*> I've had my own crappy evening. After my son showed off his increasingly
<(((*> long xmas list, my wife suggested he mark those items that were most
<(((*> important to him. So I made this joke that if he marked them all Santa would
<(((*> send him coal and switches; I have a rather oddball sense of humor, but he's
<(((*> nearly 8 and should know by now what I'm like. Next thing I know he's crying
<(((*> and my wife's in my face about hurting his feelings. I had to leave before I
<(((*> punched a fucking hole in one of the walls. It tears me up inside that I
<(((*> can't be me w/o causing harm. Screw it. I'll just go back to hanging out
<(((*> quietly in a corner somewhere. I do much less damage that way.
Oh gosh, maybe when he cheers up you can tell him about the Xmas
when my sister was eight years old. We were in West Virginia that
year, coal-mining country, so for a joke my mom put a lump of
coal in her stocking along with all the other gifts.
Ginny cried for hours. Mom was mortified. And decades later,
Ginny laughs about the story and tells it on herself frequently.
I think an apology, followed by a special dad-and-son Xmas
expedition (gift shopping for mom or maybe a tree hunt), could go
a long way to making amends.
Tara J. Ballance
Montreal, Canada
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| User: "harakiri" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 07:06:51 AM |
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ya we have a really weird flu season this year. so hope that boy will be
ok. hope karma will get to bite the DH's in the butt!
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| User: "Used2Be" |
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| Title: Re: really rotten day :-( |
13 Dec 2003 11:25:22 AM |
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"harakiri" <m.d.wittenberg@att.net> wrote in message
news:L9ECb.189648$Ec1.7024506@bgtnsc05-news.ops.worldnet.att.net...
ya we have a really weird flu season this year. so hope that boy will be
ok. hope karma will get to bite the DH's in the butt!
Ha! Thanks. :-)
u2b
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