| Topic: |
Sociology > Depression |
| User: |
"CyberDroog" |
| Date: |
22 Nov 2003 12:11:20 AM |
| Object: |
Update on Child Abusing Sister |
Gotta love our legal system...
After months of facing a felony charge for child abuse/intentionally
causing harm, the whole thing gets plead down 10 minutes before the trial.
For those who don't recall, sis got angry at her five year old in a grocery
store and dragged him out, carrying him by his hair and the seat of his
pants, twice slamming him face down on the pavement, and then slapping him
in the face causing a nosebleed.
All in front of several witnesses, who proceeded to prevent her from
driving away, which she was trying to do even though she had left her three
year old and seven year old standing in the store.
Well, the law has spoken. She was allowed to offer an Alford Plea to a
simple charge of disorderly conduct. Alford Plea = there is no admission of
guilt, but a concession that there is enough evidence to convict. It's
technically different from No Contest, but pretty much the same.
The D.A. is incompetent to say the least. Not that I wanted my sister to
be convicted of a felony, but in that it gives me no confidence in the
legal system at all. Why waste months of work and court time over the
matter when the police could have issued a citation on the spot?
God knows if I ever witness such an event, I'm going to act like Sargeant
Schulz and tell the cops "I saw nothing". That was several days of work
that the witnesses each missed in order to sit in court and be told that
what they saw wasn't enough of a concern for the D.A. to bother to actually
prosecute.
So, sis gets found guilt of the DC charge, and sentenced to two years
probation, counseling (but not psych evaluation), parental counseling, etc.
Most of the same stuff she is required to do as a result of her no contest
plea in the civil case already settled by social services (due to the same
event and past history).
Okay, so she has an appointment to basically register for probation and get
that going. She shows up and refuses to give them her current address and
phone number. I suspect that the probation, and perhaps even the social
services case, might require her not to leave the county. But she's
already staying in another county, hence she didn't want to provide an
address.
They reschedule the appointment, telling her she is required to provide the
information. So this time she simply doesn't show up. She's convinced she
never did anything wrong, so I guess she feels she doesn't have to comply.
Nothing much has ever happened to her as a consequence, so I can kind of
see her point there.
However, the probation officer, whose nickname is "Hard Case Patti" (which
my wife, Patti, thinks is kind of clever...) because she is usually
assigned sex offenders and other highly troublesome people, is already
looking for her. She called my mother and asked if she knew where sis was.
Mom said she might be at work. Surprise, sis told the court that she was
unemployed.
If the county sheriff walks into WalMart and arrests her, I don't think she
*will* be employed anymore.
This is getting more tragic all the time. At first I hoped that the felony
conviction being washed would give her a chance at a future. But she
doesn't seem willing to even accept that chance. Yet she has been telling
people that the judge was on her side. He definitely wasn't since he was
incredulous when the DA said she had offered a plea, and then he was even
more incredulous when the DA asked for only one year of probation. He
doubled that.
She has also been telling people that the probation officer can get her the
children back, and was expecting to have the children back within two
weeks. So she skips out of the probation appointment? The probation
officer can't get the kids back, of course. She has no such power. That is
under the control of social services and the court, especially since social
services filed and won a separate civil case.. It also requires her to
have a home for the kids, which she doesn't, and an income to support them,
which she doesn't.
I've actually talked to sis a couple of times lately. It was kind of
uncomfortable, but I saw her at WalMart and couldn't avoid it. But other
than chit chat, I have no clue what to say to her. She is just plain
scary.
---
You don't have to buy from anyone. You don't have to work at any particular job.
You don't have to participate in any given relationship. You can choose.
- Harry Browne
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| User: "old coyote" |
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| Title: Re: Update on Child Abusing Sister |
24 Nov 2003 10:05:37 AM |
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CyberDroog <CyberDroog@starfleet.gov> wrote in
news:tsttrvkdocs9p86e9kocdcsdhk3itnvr5h@4ax.com:
Gotta love our legal system...
After months of facing a felony charge for child abuse/intentionally
causing harm, the whole thing gets plead down 10 minutes before the
trial.
For those who don't recall, sis got angry at her five year old in a
grocery store and dragged him out, carrying him by his hair and the
seat of his pants, twice slamming him face down on the pavement, and
then slapping him in the face causing a nosebleed.
I had some very vivid flashbacks when I read this part of your post. I
was in your nephew's skin. I have been there, all too many times. :(
All in front of several witnesses, who proceeded to prevent her from
driving away, which she was trying to do even though she had left her
three year old and seven year old standing in the store.
I have lived that nightmare. For the children's sake, please do what you
can to keep them away from her until she gets the help that she needs.
Sadly, the children are doomed to a life of self-hate and dysfunction if
it continues into the future. No one deserves to grow up like that, I
don't care who they are.
:(
<snip>
--
-=oc=-
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| User: "CyberDroog" |
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| Title: Re: Update on Child Abusing Sister |
24 Nov 2003 08:56:36 PM |
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On 24 Nov 2003 16:05:37 GMT, old coyote <the_oldcoyote@yahoo.com> wrote:
I have lived that nightmare. For the children's sake, please do what you
can to keep them away from her until she gets the help that she needs.
Sadly, the children are doomed to a life of self-hate and dysfunction if
it continues into the future. No one deserves to grow up like that, I
don't care who they are.
I'm most worried about the seven year old. I know very well that he has
been hit, kicked, and had things thrown at him as well. Plus he had been
repeatedly placed in charge of the younger two and told to keep them quiet
while mom slept.
A seven year old! Cooking dinner and trying to keep two younger kids
quiet. And the only way he knew how to deal with loud kids? Hit them. He
and the five year old boy are incredibly violent. With each other, their
little sister, other kids at daycare/school, and even daycare workers.
---
The fundamental evil of the world arose from the fact that the good Lord has not
created money enough.
- Heinrich Heine
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| User: "Alan Harding" |
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| Title: Re: Update on Child Abusing Sister |
25 Nov 2003 01:49:07 AM |
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In message <q0h5svo35lvn7rdofioggjaaa6iah9k41g@4ax.com>, CyberDroog
<CyberDroog@starfleet.gov> writes
On 24 Nov 2003 16:05:37 GMT, old coyote <the_oldcoyote@yahoo.com> wrote:
I have lived that nightmare. For the children's sake, please do what you
can to keep them away from her until she gets the help that she needs.
Sadly, the children are doomed to a life of self-hate and dysfunction if
it continues into the future. No one deserves to grow up like that, I
don't care who they are.
I'm most worried about the seven year old. I know very well that he has
been hit, kicked, and had things thrown at him as well. Plus he had been
repeatedly placed in charge of the younger two and told to keep them quiet
while mom slept.
A seven year old! Cooking dinner and trying to keep two younger kids
quiet. And the only way he knew how to deal with loud kids? Hit them. He
and the five year old boy are incredibly violent. With each other, their
little sister, other kids at daycare/school, and even daycare workers.
Life can be seriously fucked up, sometimes. I wonder what therapy for
children is.
--
Alan@harding.demon.co.uk = Alan Harding =
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The opinions given above may be mine. They might also
just be what I feel like saying right now, okay?
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| User: "old coyote" |
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| Title: Re: Update on Child Abusing Sister |
25 Nov 2003 08:15:54 PM |
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Alan Harding <Alan@harding.demon.co.uk> wrote in
news:lBP6qXQzlww$EwgE@harding.demon.co.uk:
In message <q0h5svo35lvn7rdofioggjaaa6iah9k41g@4ax.com>, CyberDroog
<CyberDroog@starfleet.gov> writes
On 24 Nov 2003 16:05:37 GMT, old coyote <the_oldcoyote@yahoo.com>
wrote:
I have lived that nightmare. For the children's sake, please do what
you can to keep them away from her until she gets the help that she
needs. Sadly, the children are doomed to a life of self-hate and
dysfunction if it continues into the future. No one deserves to grow
up like that, I don't care who they are.
I'm most worried about the seven year old. I know very well that he
has been hit, kicked, and had things thrown at him as well. Plus he
had been repeatedly placed in charge of the younger two and told to
keep them quiet while mom slept.
A seven year old! Cooking dinner and trying to keep two younger kids
quiet. And the only way he knew how to deal with loud kids? Hit
them. He and the five year old boy are incredibly violent. With each
other, their little sister, other kids at daycare/school, and even
daycare workers.
Life can be seriously fucked up, sometimes. I wonder what therapy for
children is.
For me, during those years, it was focussing on the needs of my younger
brother. He's only four years my junior, but that is quite significant
when one is 7-8-9-10-11-12. I still remember having to register him for
school when I was in fourth grade. And we fought, just as was described
above, for the same reasons. It gave me a feeling of purpose and a reason
to live. Those were some of the best days of my life. They were also some
of the worst.
We're still quite close. I find myself getting more than a little
iriatated if he doesn't make the choices that I think he should today. I
do a pretty good job of hiding that though. :) But I am still more than
just a big brother to him.
--
-=oc=-
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| User: "wombn" |
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| Title: Re: Update on Child Abusing Sister |
22 Nov 2003 09:14:39 AM |
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I feel for ya. I have no idea how I'd react in such a situation.
"Kind of uncomfortable" would begin to describe it.
--
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If laughter is the best medicine,
then kittens should be covered by our health insurance. :-)
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| User: "Whiskers" |
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| Title: Re: Update on Child Abusing Sister |
22 Nov 2003 10:48:35 AM |
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In alt.support.depression on Saturday 22 Nov 2003 6:11 am, CyberDroog
<CyberDroog@starfleet.gov> wrote:
snip
I've actually talked to sis a couple of times lately. It was kind of
uncomfortable, but I saw her at WalMart and couldn't avoid it. But other
than chit chat, I have no clue what to say to her. She is just plain
scary.
You have my sympathy; your position must be very difficult. We can but hope
that your sister does eventually get the help she needs. How are the
children?
I'm intrigued by the 'plea' thing. Is this what is meant by 'to cop a
plea'? I don't think we have anything like that here; the nearest I can
think of is that the prosecutor [1] might reduce the charge to a less
serious one in the belief that a conviction would be more likely (eg
'driving without due care and attention' instead of 'dangerous driving', or
'manslaughter' instead of 'murder'). That wouldn't stop the trial though,
or prevent counsel or the judge from calling witnesses.
[1] That would be 'the Director of Public Prosecutions' or 'DPP' for a
criminal trial, in England or Wales; I think 'the Procurator Fiscal' in
Scotland).
--
-- ^^^^^^^^^^ Interested in Citroens?
-- Whiskers <http://www.aacit.net>
-- ~~~~~~~~~~ <news:alt.autos.citroen>
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| User: "CyberDroog" |
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| Title: Re: Update on Child Abusing Sister |
24 Nov 2003 08:51:34 PM |
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On Sat, 22 Nov 2003 16:48:35 +0000, Whiskers <catwheezel@operamail.com>
wrote:
In alt.support.depression on Saturday 22 Nov 2003 6:11 am, CyberDroog
<CyberDroog@starfleet.gov> wrote:
I've actually talked to sis a couple of times lately. It was kind of
uncomfortable, but I saw her at WalMart and couldn't avoid it. But other
than chit chat, I have no clue what to say to her. She is just plain
scary.
You have my sympathy; your position must be very difficult. We can but hope
that your sister does eventually get the help she needs. How are the
children?
The children, currently living with their father, are doing much better
now. They are fed, their clothes are clean, and the seven year old is no
longer being told to watch the younger two while mom sleeps.
I'm intrigued by the 'plea' thing. Is this what is meant by 'to cop a
plea'? I don't think we have anything like that here; the nearest I can
think of is that the prosecutor [1] might reduce the charge to a less
serious one in the belief that a conviction would be more likely (eg
'driving without due care and attention' instead of 'dangerous driving', or
'manslaughter' instead of 'murder'). That wouldn't stop the trial though,
or prevent counsel or the judge from calling witnesses.
That is pretty much what "copping a plea" means. The charge is reduced in
return for a guilty plea (or no contest). The judge then finds the person
guilty, and no trial is needed.
Over here it seems to be done almost automatically for many crimes.
---
SAINT, n. A dead sinner revised and edited.
- Ambrose Bierce
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| User: "Whiskers" |
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| Title: Re: Update on Child Abusing Sister |
25 Nov 2003 08:16:21 PM |
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In alt.support.depression on Tuesday 25 Nov 2003 2:51 am, CyberDroog
<CyberDroog@starfleet.gov> wrote:
snip
The children, currently living with their father, are doing much better
now. They are fed, their clothes are clean, and the seven year old is no
longer being told to watch the younger two while mom sleeps.
That's good. Not perfect, but pretty good considering, if you see what I
mean.
--
-- ^^^^^^^^^^ Interested in Citroens?
-- Whiskers <http://www.aacit.net>
-- ~~~~~~~~~~ <news:alt.autos.citroen>
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| User: "Michael A. Ball" |
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| Title: Re: Update on Child Abusing Sister |
22 Nov 2003 11:28:09 AM |
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On Sat, 22 Nov 2003 06:11:20 GMT, CyberDroog <CyberDroog@starfleet.gov> wrote:
Gotta love our legal system...
After months of facing a felony charge for child abuse/intentionally
causing harm, the whole thing gets plead down 10 minutes before the trial.
For those who don't recall, sis got angry at her five year old in a grocery
store and dragged him out, carrying him by his hair and the seat of his
pants, twice slamming him face down on the pavement, and then slapping him
in the face causing a nosebleed. {...}
I'm very sorry you are in this position. I wish I had something very
comforting to say to you. I don't appreciate children, but I believe they
ought to be protected and nurtured--Whatever It Takes!
I'm a gentle person, and don't believe in hitting women or butting into
others' business, but if I had been a witness, I, most likely, would have gone
to jail. There is absolutely nothing a five year old child could do to deserve
that sort of mistreatment. That child is in imminent danger.
I am sad for you, and even more so for the children and their future. I don't
know what has caused your sis to become this way, and I'm doubtful any amount
of counseling will help, but I deeply hope so.
For your own sanity, I hope you will come here and unwind.
Michael
A day without recoil is like a day without sunshine!
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| User: "CyberDroog" |
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| Title: Re: Update on Child Abusing Sister |
24 Nov 2003 08:53:10 PM |
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On Sat, 22 Nov 2003 12:28:09 -0500, Michael A. Ball <Guardian@wireco.net>
wrote:
For your own sanity, I hope you will come here and unwind.
God know I *am* wound up these days... Thanks!
---
DISCUSSION, n. A method of confirming others in their errors.
- Ambrose Bierce
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| User: "Tracy Barber" |
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| Title: Re: Update on Child Abusing Sister |
24 Nov 2003 10:52:51 PM |
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On Tue, 25 Nov 2003 02:53:10 GMT, CyberDroog
<CyberDroog@starfleet.gov> wrote:
On Sat, 22 Nov 2003 12:28:09 -0500, Michael A. Ball <Guardian@wireco.net>
wrote:
For your own sanity, I hope you will come here and unwind.
God know I *am* wound up these days... Thanks!
Yeah! Like he said! :^)
Tracy Barber
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