| Topic: |
Sociology > Depression |
| User: |
"" |
| Date: |
18 Apr 2007 12:13:11 PM |
| Object: |
When Will Things Get Better? |
I friggin HAAATE mornings!!! I absolutely DEPLORE waking up every day
to my reality. It's still such a painful jolt to my system, the
people I've lost and the frame of mind/state of emotions I'm in, and I
NEVER want to wake up in the morning. I guess maybe I'm still in
shock, because I still can't believe that that they're gone, that I'm
where I'm at....it's unacceptable to me, after all I've done over the
years. I know, whine whine whine...it just isn't fair to be worse off
than I have ever been. It's like all that I have ever done, all my
desperate and fierce attempts, all the days and weeks and months and
years of therapy, meds, reading, taking classes, and the other
measures I've taken still leave me in this dark despair! What in
God's name is there left for me to try? And why the hell do I want to
try anymore when I'll just end up here again! I don't want to
exist!
*crying*
I will never understand this, and I'm tired of trying to, and I'm
weary of having any hope that things will ever change more than for a
temporary period of time, and those in-between times are far too few
and don't compare to the amount of time I spend 'here', here in
misery.
I'm sure posting here is more than just for me to get it out, a cry
for help and support I suppose, but don't you all feel like, "What is
there for anyone to say that will change this? Sure, maybe I can get
through a moment, cope better for a couple of hours," but then the
hell starts allllll over again the next day. I'm tired.
Rose
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| User: "%" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 12:19:23 PM |
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<smudgedrose@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1176916391.323374.255140@d57g2000hsg.googlegroups.com...
I friggin HAAATE mornings!!! I absolutely DEPLORE waking up every day
to my reality. It's still such a painful jolt to my system, the
people I've lost and the frame of mind/state of emotions I'm in, and I
NEVER want to wake up in the morning. I guess maybe I'm still in
shock, because I still can't believe that that they're gone, that I'm
where I'm at....it's unacceptable to me, after all I've done over the
years. I know, whine whine whine...it just isn't fair to be worse off
than I have ever been. It's like all that I have ever done, all my
desperate and fierce attempts, all the days and weeks and months and
years of therapy, meds, reading, taking classes, and the other
measures I've taken still leave me in this dark despair! What in
God's name is there left for me to try? And why the hell do I want to
try anymore when I'll just end up here again! I don't want to
exist!
*crying*
I will never understand this, and I'm tired of trying to, and I'm
weary of having any hope that things will ever change more than for a
temporary period of time, and those in-between times are far too few
and don't compare to the amount of time I spend 'here', here in
misery.
I'm sure posting here is more than just for me to get it out, a cry
for help and support I suppose, but don't you all feel like, "What is
there for anyone to say that will change this? Sure, maybe I can get
through a moment, cope better for a couple of hours," but then the
hell starts allllll over again the next day. I'm tired.
Rose
nothing changes if nothing changes ,
you want it to be different , change it
.
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| User: "" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 12:29:53 PM |
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On Apr 18, 10:19 am, "%" <pers...@gmail.com> wrote:
<smudgedr...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1176916391.323374.255140@d57g2000hsg.googlegroups.com...
I friggin HAAATE mornings!!! I absolutely DEPLORE waking up every day
to my reality. It's still such a painful jolt to my system, the
people I've lost and the frame of mind/state of emotions I'm in, and I
NEVER want to wake up in the morning. I guess maybe I'm still in
shock, because I still can't believe that that they're gone, that I'm
where I'm at....it's unacceptable to me, after all I've done over the
years. I know, whine whine whine...it just isn't fair to be worse off
than I have ever been. It's like all that I have ever done, all my
desperate and fierce attempts, all the days and weeks and months and
years of therapy, meds, reading, taking classes, and the other
measures I've taken still leave me in this dark despair! What in
God's name is there left for me to try? And why the hell do I want to
try anymore when I'll just end up here again! I don't want to
exist!
*crying*
I will never understand this, and I'm tired of trying to, and I'm
weary of having any hope that things will ever change more than for a
temporary period of time, and those in-between times are far too few
and don't compare to the amount of time I spend 'here', here in
misery.
I'm sure posting here is more than just for me to get it out, a cry
for help and support I suppose, but don't you all feel like, "What is
there for anyone to say that will change this? Sure, maybe I can get
through a moment, cope better for a couple of hours," but then the
hell starts allllll over again the next day. I'm tired.
Rose
nothing changes if nothing changes ,
you want it to be different , change it- Hide quoted text -
- Show quoted text -
You know I don't see you saying the same thing to some of the other
regular posters when they are having a bad time. Sometimes people are
powerless to change things no matter how badly they want to and try
all the methods they can come up with, at least that's been my
personal experience as well as what I've been reading others here have
and are experiencing at times. I don't always post like this, and my
posts are at least getting less like this, as I see it does me no good
to say the same thing over and over. You are ignoring the fact that a
big part of depression was triggered from being in mourning, and I
can't change that, I can't bring those people back into my life.
Sure, maybe someone might tell me to get over it, move on, stop
grieving over them, but I CAN'T, it's how I feel.
Rose
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| User: "Bacon" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 07:50:17 PM |
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On 18 Apr 2007 10:29:53 -0700, wrote:
Sometimes people are powerless to change things no matter how badly they want to
I was there, you can't function and can't recover without help, you
absolutely need someone to take control. I reached out to my sister
who dropped everything to focus on me...we aren't even very close, it
was quite a site...she called my employer, my insuarance companies, my
psychiatrist and pulled strings to find me an inpatient bed that
night. She arranged to care for my cats, totally cleaned my apartment
and had the presence of mind to remove my 2 handguns, it was funny
when she put them in her purse, she said, "Jesus I better not get
pulled over tonight". She called my parents in Forida and the whole
time talking to me and comforting me, it saved my life.
There must be someone in your life that cares, an old friend, a family
friend, even a respected teacher from your past...when you reach out
to someone they react and are flattered, everyone goes through periods
of need like this (not always to this extreme of course, but I did),
so don't think you're unique or fucked or that nobody gets your pain,
I certainly do.
I know Jane would be at your door ASAP if you asked, there are good
people all around.
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| User: "used2be" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 08:09:12 PM |
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"Bacon" <rbkfour@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:hied23ti6am4nnb4loa0pc0rh390v1gq2q@4ax.com...
On 18 Apr 2007 10:29:53 -0700, wrote:
Sometimes people are powerless to change things no matter how badly they
want to
I was there, you can't function and can't recover without help, you
absolutely need someone to take control. I reached out to my sister
who dropped everything to focus on me...we aren't even very close, it
was quite a site...she called my employer, my insuarance companies, my
psychiatrist and pulled strings to find me an inpatient bed that
night. She arranged to care for my cats, totally cleaned my apartment
and had the presence of mind to remove my 2 handguns, it was funny
when she put them in her purse, she said, "Jesus I better not get
pulled over tonight". She called my parents in Forida and the whole
time talking to me and comforting me, it saved my life.
wow, that's pretty kewl, bacon!
There must be someone in your life that cares, an old friend, a family
friend, even a respected teacher from your past...when you reach out
to someone they react and are flattered, everyone goes through periods
of need like this (not always to this extreme of course, but I did),
so don't think you're unique or fucked or that nobody gets your pain,
I certainly do.
yep!
I know Jane would be at your door ASAP if you asked, there are good
people all around.
yeah...she would, wouldn't she?
:)
.
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| User: "%" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 08:30:28 PM |
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"used2be" <used2be@nowhere.com> wrote in message
news:4626c136$0$8913$4c368faf@roadrunner.com...
"Bacon" <rbkfour@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:hied23ti6am4nnb4loa0pc0rh390v1gq2q@4ax.com...
On 18 Apr 2007 10:29:53 -0700, wrote:
Sometimes people are powerless to change things no matter how badly
they
want to
I was there, you can't function and can't recover without help, you
absolutely need someone to take control. I reached out to my sister
who dropped everything to focus on me...we aren't even very close,
it
was quite a site...she called my employer, my insuarance companies,
my
psychiatrist and pulled strings to find me an inpatient bed that
night. She arranged to care for my cats, totally cleaned my
apartment
and had the presence of mind to remove my 2 handguns, it was funny
when she put them in her purse, she said, "Jesus I better not get
pulled over tonight". She called my parents in Forida and the whole
time talking to me and comforting me, it saved my life.
wow, that's pretty kewl, bacon!
There must be someone in your life that cares, an old friend, a
family
friend, even a respected teacher from your past...when you reach out
to someone they react and are flattered, everyone goes through
periods
of need like this (not always to this extreme of course, but I did),
so don't think you're unique or fucked or that nobody gets your
pain,
I certainly do.
yep!
I know Jane would be at your door ASAP if you asked, there are good
people all around.
yeah...she would, wouldn't she?
:)
i would if i was allowed
.
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| User: "Jane" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 08:44:04 PM |
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"used2be" <used2be@nowhere.com> wrote in message
news:4626c136$0$8913$4c368faf@roadrunner.com...
"Bacon" <rbkfour@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:hied23ti6am4nnb4loa0pc0rh390v1gq2q@4ax.com...
On 18 Apr 2007 10:29:53 -0700, wrote:
Sometimes people are powerless to change things no matter how badly they
want to
I was there, you can't function and can't recover without help, you
absolutely need someone to take control. I reached out to my sister
who dropped everything to focus on me...we aren't even very close, it
was quite a site...she called my employer, my insuarance companies, my
psychiatrist and pulled strings to find me an inpatient bed that
night. She arranged to care for my cats, totally cleaned my apartment
and had the presence of mind to remove my 2 handguns, it was funny
when she put them in her purse, she said, "Jesus I better not get
pulled over tonight". She called my parents in Forida and the whole
time talking to me and comforting me, it saved my life.
wow, that's pretty kewl, bacon!
There must be someone in your life that cares, an old friend, a family
friend, even a respected teacher from your past...when you reach out
to someone they react and are flattered, everyone goes through periods
of need like this (not always to this extreme of course, but I did),
so don't think you're unique or fucked or that nobody gets your pain,
I certainly do.
yep!
I know Jane would be at your door ASAP if you asked, there are good
people all around.
yeah...she would, wouldn't she?
:)
Awww thank you both for your faith in me, and you're probably right LOL.
I'm such a care taker aren't I? Is that a good thing or bad? Sometimes I
think I'm smothering and other times I think I'm trying to do good deed to
make up for all the bad ones in my life, and well other times I think I feel
other peoples pain so deeply that I want to "fix" their pain to ease my own.
Wow that ended up a little deep huh
Ok back to playing
.
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| User: "used2be" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 11:25:53 PM |
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"Jane" <jarsenal66nospam@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:d76dnWJO-fnOVLvbnZ2dnUVZ_tmknZ2d@adelphia.com...
"used2be" <used2be@nowhere.com> wrote in message
news:4626c136$0$8913$4c368faf@roadrunner.com...
"Bacon" <rbkfour@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:hied23ti6am4nnb4loa0pc0rh390v1gq2q@4ax.com...
On 18 Apr 2007 10:29:53 -0700, wrote:
Sometimes people are powerless to change things no matter how badly they
want to
I was there, you can't function and can't recover without help, you
absolutely need someone to take control. I reached out to my sister
who dropped everything to focus on me...we aren't even very close, it
was quite a site...she called my employer, my insuarance companies, my
psychiatrist and pulled strings to find me an inpatient bed that
night. She arranged to care for my cats, totally cleaned my apartment
and had the presence of mind to remove my 2 handguns, it was funny
when she put them in her purse, she said, "Jesus I better not get
pulled over tonight". She called my parents in Forida and the whole
time talking to me and comforting me, it saved my life.
wow, that's pretty kewl, bacon!
There must be someone in your life that cares, an old friend, a family
friend, even a respected teacher from your past...when you reach out
to someone they react and are flattered, everyone goes through periods
of need like this (not always to this extreme of course, but I did),
so don't think you're unique or fucked or that nobody gets your pain,
I certainly do.
yep!
I know Jane would be at your door ASAP if you asked, there are good
people all around.
yeah...she would, wouldn't she?
:)
Awww thank you both for your faith in me, and you're probably right LOL.
I'm such a care taker aren't I? Is that a good thing or bad? Sometimes I
think I'm smothering and other times I think I'm trying to do good deed to
make up for all the bad ones in my life, and well other times I think I
feel other peoples pain so deeply that I want to "fix" their pain to ease
my own.
Wow that ended up a little deep huh
actually it sounded alot like ME!
<g>
.
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| User: "Bacon" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 09:01:04 PM |
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On Wed, 18 Apr 2007 21:44:04 -0400, "Jane"
<jarsenal66nospam@hotmail.com> wrote:
"used2be" <used2be@nowhere.com> wrote in message
news:4626c136$0$8913$4c368faf@roadrunner.com...
"Bacon" <rbkfour@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:hied23ti6am4nnb4loa0pc0rh390v1gq2q@4ax.com...
On 18 Apr 2007 10:29:53 -0700, wrote:
Sometimes people are powerless to change things no matter how badly they
want to
I was there, you can't function and can't recover without help, you
absolutely need someone to take control. I reached out to my sister
who dropped everything to focus on me...we aren't even very close, it
was quite a site...she called my employer, my insuarance companies, my
psychiatrist and pulled strings to find me an inpatient bed that
night. She arranged to care for my cats, totally cleaned my apartment
and had the presence of mind to remove my 2 handguns, it was funny
when she put them in her purse, she said, "Jesus I better not get
pulled over tonight". She called my parents in Forida and the whole
time talking to me and comforting me, it saved my life.
wow, that's pretty kewl, bacon!
There must be someone in your life that cares, an old friend, a family
friend, even a respected teacher from your past...when you reach out
to someone they react and are flattered, everyone goes through periods
of need like this (not always to this extreme of course, but I did),
so don't think you're unique or fucked or that nobody gets your pain,
I certainly do.
yep!
I know Jane would be at your door ASAP if you asked, there are good
people all around.
yeah...she would, wouldn't she?
:)
Awww thank you both for your faith in me, and you're probably right LOL.
I'm such a care taker aren't I? Is that a good thing or bad? Sometimes I
think I'm smothering and other times I think I'm trying to do good deed to
make up for all the bad ones in my life, and well other times I think I feel
other peoples pain so deeply that I want to "fix" their pain to ease my own.
Wow that ended up a little deep huh
I'll say, can't you just accept the fact that you're a good person...I
LOL'ed seeing all the negative spins you put on your compassion for
others.
.
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| User: "Bitterball" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 04:03:19 PM |
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<smudgedrose@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1176916391.323374.255140@d57g2000hsg.googlegroups.com...
I friggin HAAATE mornings!!! I absolutely DEPLORE waking up every day
to my reality. It's still such a painful jolt to my system,
Rose, it happens in poker. eventually you get dealt aces. (Mike Matusow
notwithstanding)
.
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| User: "BoredToTears" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 03:43:57 PM |
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On 18 Apr, 18:13, wrote:
I friggin HAAATE mornings!!! I absolutely DEPLORE waking up every day
to my reality. It's still such a painful jolt to my system, the
people I've lost and the frame of mind/state of emotions I'm in, and I
NEVER want to wake up in the morning. I guess maybe I'm still in
shock, because I still can't believe that that they're gone, that I'm
where I'm at....it's unacceptable to me, after all I've done over the
years. I know, whine whine whine...it just isn't fair to be worse off
than I have ever been. It's like all that I have ever done, all my
desperate and fierce attempts, all the days and weeks and months and
years of therapy, meds, reading, taking classes, and the other
measures I've taken still leave me in this dark despair! What in
God's name is there left for me to try? And why the hell do I want to
try anymore when I'll just end up here again! I don't want to
exist!
*crying*
I will never understand this, and I'm tired of trying to, and I'm
weary of having any hope that things will ever change more than for a
temporary period of time, and those in-between times are far too few
and don't compare to the amount of time I spend 'here', here in
misery.
I'm sure posting here is more than just for me to get it out, a cry
for help and support I suppose, but don't you all feel like, "What is
there for anyone to say that will change this? Sure, maybe I can get
through a moment, cope better for a couple of hours," but then the
hell starts allllll over again the next day. I'm tired.
Rose
I don't have anything to say that'll make any difference. Just thought
I'd let you know I read your post and I empathise. Take care.
.
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| User: "Den Fox" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 12:25:24 PM |
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On Apr 18, 1:13 pm, wrote:
I friggin HAAATE mornings!!! I absolutely DEPLORE waking up every day
to my reality. It's still such a painful jolt to my system, the
people I've lost and the frame of mind/state of emotions I'm in, and I
NEVER want to wake up in the morning. I guess maybe I'm still in
shock, because I still can't believe that that they're gone, that I'm
where I'm at....it's unacceptable to me, after all I've done over the
years. I know, whine whine whine...it just isn't fair to be worse off
than I have ever been. It's like all that I have ever done, all my
desperate and fierce attempts, all the days and weeks and months and
years of therapy, meds, reading, taking classes, and the other
measures I've taken still leave me in this dark despair! What in
God's name is there left for me to try? And why the hell do I want to
try anymore when I'll just end up here again! I don't want to
exist!
*crying*
I will never understand this, and I'm tired of trying to, and I'm
weary of having any hope that things will ever change more than for a
temporary period of time, and those in-between times are far too few
and don't compare to the amount of time I spend 'here', here in
misery.
I'm sure posting here is more than just for me to get it out, a cry
for help and support I suppose, but don't you all feel like, "What is
there for anyone to say that will change this? Sure, maybe I can get
through a moment, cope better for a couple of hours," but then the
hell starts allllll over again the next day. I'm tired.
Rose
I saw a guy with a bumper sticker, "Life is good," this morning. I
thought about rear-ending him, but just for a moment... I swear.
Mornings are worst, Rose. I'm here for you. My morning comes earlier
than yours and my case is not as severe right now.
May you find a moment of peace,
-denfox
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| User: "Luna" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 08:51:42 PM |
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"Den Fox" <thefoolishfox@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1176917124.484352.71840@b75g2000hsg.googlegroups.com...
On Apr 18, 1:13 pm, wrote:
I friggin HAAATE mornings!!! I absolutely DEPLORE waking up every day
to my reality. It's still such a painful jolt to my system, the
people I've lost and the frame of mind/state of emotions I'm in, and I
NEVER want to wake up in the morning. I guess maybe I'm still in
shock, because I still can't believe that that they're gone, that I'm
where I'm at....it's unacceptable to me, after all I've done over the
years. I know, whine whine whine...it just isn't fair to be worse off
than I have ever been. It's like all that I have ever done, all my
desperate and fierce attempts, all the days and weeks and months and
years of therapy, meds, reading, taking classes, and the other
measures I've taken still leave me in this dark despair! What in
God's name is there left for me to try? And why the hell do I want to
try anymore when I'll just end up here again! I don't want to
exist!
*crying*
I will never understand this, and I'm tired of trying to, and I'm
weary of having any hope that things will ever change more than for a
temporary period of time, and those in-between times are far too few
and don't compare to the amount of time I spend 'here', here in
misery.
I'm sure posting here is more than just for me to get it out, a cry
for help and support I suppose, but don't you all feel like, "What is
there for anyone to say that will change this? Sure, maybe I can get
through a moment, cope better for a couple of hours," but then the
hell starts allllll over again the next day. I'm tired.
Rose
I saw a guy with a bumper sticker, "Life is good," this morning. I
thought about rear-ending him, but just for a moment... I swear.
Hah!
The thing is though - life *is* good. There are a lot of good things about
it. I understand that problems can stack up and it can feel like nothing is
good but in reality - life *is* good. The other stuff is illness, bad luck,
the consequences of laziness, interaction with assholes, etc.
Essentially though - life is good. It's all good. Proceed on that basis.
Most of us live in North America - or Western Europe - that's a lottery win
right there.
Jean
~I will come to Polyanna when called~
Mornings are worst, Rose. I'm here for you. My morning comes earlier
than yours and my case is not as severe right now.
May you find a moment of peace,
-denfox
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| User: "" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 03:35:36 PM |
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On Apr 18, 10:25 am, Den Fox <thefoolish...@gmail.com> wrote:
On Apr 18, 1:13 pm, wrote:
I friggin HAAATE mornings!!! I absolutely DEPLORE waking up every day
to my reality. It's still such a painful jolt to my system, the
people I've lost and the frame of mind/state of emotions I'm in, and I
NEVER want to wake up in the morning. I guess maybe I'm still in
shock, because I still can't believe that that they're gone, that I'm
where I'm at....it's unacceptable to me, after all I've done over the
years. I know, whine whine whine...it just isn't fair to be worse off
than I have ever been. It's like all that I have ever done, all my
desperate and fierce attempts, all the days and weeks and months and
years of therapy, meds, reading, taking classes, and the other
measures I've taken still leave me in this dark despair! What in
God's name is there left for me to try? And why the hell do I want to
try anymore when I'll just end up here again! I don't want to
exist!
*crying*
I will never understand this, and I'm tired of trying to, and I'm
weary of having any hope that things will ever change more than for a
temporary period of time, and those in-between times are far too few
and don't compare to the amount of time I spend 'here', here in
misery.
I'm sure posting here is more than just for me to get it out, a cry
for help and support I suppose, but don't you all feel like, "What is
there for anyone to say that will change this? Sure, maybe I can get
through a moment, cope better for a couple of hours," but then the
hell starts allllll over again the next day. I'm tired.
Rose
I saw a guy with a bumper sticker, "Life is good," this morning. I
thought about rear-ending him, but just for a moment... I swear.
Mornings are worst, Rose. I'm here for you. My morning comes earlier
than yours and my case is not as severe right now.
May you find a moment of peace,
-denfox- Hide quoted text -
- Show quoted text -
Thanks Den, you're always thoughtful and supportive....yeah, think I
would have felt the same way seeing that bumper sticker. Hope you're
day is going well...
(((((Den))))
Rose
Rose
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| User: "used2be" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 03:16:29 PM |
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i don't know when, hunny...but things WILL get better. i know it doesn't
seem possible, but they will. :'-(
they just will.
*hugs*
~cindy
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| User: "" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 03:38:36 PM |
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On Apr 18, 1:16 pm, "used2be" <used...@nowhere.com> wrote:
i don't know when, hunny...but things WILL get better. i know it doesn't
seem possible, but they will. :'-(
they just will.
*hugs*
~cindy
Cindy, you are absolutely WONDERFUL! You always reply to my posts
and you are so caring and wise....thank you so much for your optimism,
I need to hear it to combat all the other thoughts running around in
my head, all the emotions I'm having. I hope you're doing as well as
you always sound you are...you seem to have it together, so strong.
Thanks Cindy....
((((((Cindy))))))))
Rose
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| User: "used2be" |
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| Title: Re: When Will Things Get Better? |
18 Apr 2007 04:12:23 PM |
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<smudgedrose@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1176928716.179256.46790@l77g2000hsb.googlegroups.com...
On Apr 18, 1:16 pm, "used2be" <used...@nowhere.com> wrote:
i don't know when, hunny...but things WILL get better. i know it doesn't
seem possible, but they will. :'-(
they just will.
*hugs*
~cindy
Cindy, you are absolutely WONDERFUL! You always reply to my posts
and you are so caring and wise....thank you so much for your optimism,
I need to hear it to combat all the other thoughts running around in
my head, all the emotions I'm having. I hope you're doing as well as
you always sound you are...you seem to have it together, so strong.
Thanks Cindy....
well, i don't know about having it all together. <grin> but anyway, i know
where you are, and i know how UTTERLY HOPELESS it feels. and having come
thru and out on the other side of it, the only thing i can offer you is the
knowledge that you WILL come out on the other side of it. no matter how bad
it feels right now. :(
please keep hanging in there, rose!
~cindy
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