The latent pleasures of the /Bumfight/ videos have never revealed themselves to
the Rude Pundit. The choppily-edited scenes of homeless men and/or crackheads
paid to beat the living ***** out of each other, with its moments of public
shitting, rotten teeth pulling, and more, has always seemed a bit too esoteric,
an audience limited to assholes ( http://snipurl.com/i5s2 ) and wimpy
*****-wannabes (those skeevy fuckers who hang around assholes hoping some of
that backward ball cap glory can be their own but who secretly either despise
the ***** or want to ***** the ***** or both). Maybe it's the blatant
exploitation. Maybe it's the idea of seeing it on DVD in the comfort of your
frat house instead of pulling up a bar stool to see it live.
For, surely, there's fun to be had from watching a good brawl, where verminous
cretins, filled with alcohol and hubris, just need something to spark them to
crazed bouts of mindless violence. Like a soccer match. Or the nomination to
the Supreme Court of someone who isn't obviously bugfuck insane fundamentalist
Christian right wing nutzoid.
'Cause, even though, and, c'mon, the chances of Harriet Miers being some lefty
who's been playin' rope-a-dope with George W. Bush since the 1990s are about
the same as Donald Rumsfeld admitting an error, it's a blast to watch
conservatives go ballistic that Bush didn't nominate Johnny Fuckyerrights, a
Pepperdine-educated ideologue who has personally beaten a "confession" out of a
"terrorist" and then shoved aborted fetuses back into wombs after chainsawing
down an old growth forest just to make a single copy of a book on intelligent
design that can be sold by Halliburton at a thousand-fold mark-up to poor
school districts forced by law to teach it. And, what the *****, he's black.
Here's the /National/ /Review's/ Ramesh Ponnuru (which, strangely, is also the
name of the Rude Pundit's favorite Sri Lankan dish) on CNN's /Newsnight/ last
night: "I think it's a missed opportunity for the president to nominate
somebody and get them confirmed who's a solid conservative with a track record
and a known quantity, who has given us some evidence that she's thought
seriously about the role of the judiciary in our society." Ponnuru (which is
also the Rude Pundit's favorite Kama Sutra position) said that, as William
Kristol commented, conservatives are "demoralized."
And then Ponnuru joined the party liberals have been having for about, let's
say, four and a half years now: "[T]he argument that the administration making
is, this was a good decision because the president made it and the president
makes good decisions. And that might be enough for a monarchy, but it's plainly
not a persuasive argument in a democratic system." Which used to be called
"questioning a President at a time of war" or "treasonous" or some such *****
when it was the rest of us who asked Bush to actually persuade us that he's
right. Hey, /National/ /Review,/ welcome back to America - now why don't you
help clean up the fuckin' mess you made?
There's little Dickie Viguerie, who's been polluting the pool since at least the
Goldwater era, and has finally said what many real and actual conservatives
(those of that old school but still evil variety) have been saying: that George
Bush could give a ***** less about conservative "values": "President Bush
desperately needed to have an ideological fight with the Left to redefine
himself and re-energize his political base, which is in shock and dismay over
his big government policies."
Yeah, it's a fun time here, watching the conservative bumfight, with Rich Lowry
smashing a chair over Orrin Hatch's head, with Pat Buchanan forcing Ken
Mehlman's face into a pile of *****. The right has had a hard-on for the big
ideological battle for years, thinking that this time, this Supreme Court
nominee would be it. But then, inconveniently, with DeLay slamming into a brick
wall called "indictment," with the Iraq war making Bush's every utterance a lie
to the general public, with Plamegate potentially blowing up, the right is
reacting like it's got blue balls once again, screaming at anyone who'll listen
that it's time for sprays of conservative jizz to despoil the body politic.
But don't worry, sweet conservatives. Harriet Miers will turn out to be the good
little toady you need her to be. You may have lost faith in George Bush's
ability to make decisions, but the Rude Pundit has not.
<http://rudepundit.blogspot.com/2005/10/conservative-bumfight-latent-pleasures.html>
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