Hello, I am Nostrildamus, a most gifted man with a very sensitive psychic
nose that's able to detect future events. However, I have a bad sinus cold
right now, and I can't foresee anything.
When the virus leaves, I'll relate my startling predictions here for all to
marvel at.
I can also smell bisexual and hetero filth many miles away. It is my divine
duty to harass these pieces of waste. They are not God's favorites, but I
certainly am as a gay man of considerable importance and notoriety.
Texas has so many offensive odors that it's very difficult to smell the
future living here. Nevertheless, being a superior fairy, I am, with some
determined effort mind you, able to rise above the noxious odors, and speak
directly to the great prophet Nostradamus.
No one knows, for example, that Michel Nostradamus, whom I chatted with
again late last night, and played footsie with, has intimated that he had a
rebellious son who later became the founder of the infamous criminal
organization, the Cosa Nostra -- so named with an uncompleted anagram to
represent his family's name. Michel told me he felt quite dishonored by
this future development, long after he died. It brought great sadness to
him.
Yes, I know many such incredible secrets and have much knowledge of the
details of our lives -- YOUR LIFE -- and how they will play out in our
foreboding future.
My nose is big and long, not because I've lied like Pinnochio did, but
because it serves two divine purposes -- to detect future events by
intuitive odor analyses, and to prong my lovers' buttocks. It is an extra
sensual benefit bestowed by God upon me, for I have, you see, a massive
penis, too, that satisfies even the most demanding of lovers. Combined with
my outstanding and rare psychic insight by smell and my superior intellect,
I am quite the catch.
You may email me at any time and I may be able to answer your questions
about the future. If my nose can't do it, my psychic link with Michel can.
If all you desire is my massive penis or my gifted sensual big long nose,
perhaps that, too, can be arranged. I am your devoted servant.
Nostrildamus
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