Taming th unicycle
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he said it ws about conquering fear
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Rodriguez
'Sugar Man'
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he could of sugarcoated it
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a 20 inch unicycle
in th back of th coles shopping centre carpark
night after night
i am
going to make it to th top of th hill
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time after time
after time
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eventually
not willing to say how long
i'm a slow learner
i made it to th top of th hill
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to find th
road
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then it ws too slow
so i bought a 24 inch beast
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till i wore out th frame
bt th hub ws good
so i put it in a half bicycle frame
and beached it
th rim rusted out so
i respoked it
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and loved it so much
i made a second 24 inch
half bi cycle
[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 22:00:10]
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Rickie Lee Jones
'On Saturday Afternoons in 1963'
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always makes me think of my mother when this plays
tear in my eye
talkin about my creations mum
go easy ok
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so i had two of em
weird beasts
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i took a sickie off work one day and
respoked and rerimmed one
and made it into a 27 inch unicycle
perfect fr th surf
a half bicycle surf unicycle
it loved th waves and
hard packed low tide beach sand
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then i bought a skatebike
half unicycle
half skateboard
bt rarely rid eit
a bit small and
i cn ride a uni
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then i wanted a tougher big
unicycle
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Regurgitator
'Pop Porn'
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so i bought a 26 inch
48 spoke
mountain unicycle
a muni
loves to do broadslides
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then i chopped a mountain bicycle in half and
made a monoshock unicycle
24 inch
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trippy came along and
choppe dmy creation in half again and
halved th swingarm length
made it much moe ridable and
i wandered everywhere on it
lookin for terrain it couldnt handle
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not content
i bought a 36 inch unicycle
fr cruisin th roads
high geared and
it loafs down th road
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and still
i'm thinkin on th nxt purchase
a 27 with a 29 inhc tyre special
maybe
or a plain jane 26
i cn make another monoshock frm
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U2
'When Love Comes To Town'
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yeah i'll love that one too
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cant chop th muni
cant get th cranks off it
tough torker she is
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then maybe another 36
so i cn experiment
it needs suspension
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it;s an addiction bt
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i cn handle it
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i wander th net and
see how many unicycles
john foss has and
i'm nowhere near as addicted as he is
yet
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i find a guy
ridin a 52 inch uni
in holland
hmm
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my trandem project
th goodies bike
sits in th back yard
sans th rear two sets of pedals and seats
turned it into a ute
to cart unicycles frm here to there
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i still have a 20 inch
a 24 monoshock special
a 26 hardtail muni
a 27 surf unicycle
a 36 inch road wheel
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Machine Gun Fellatio
'Line Of Silver'
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th last is silver
th monoshock has gone matt black
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with a bright yellow shock absorber
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bt th heads turn more when th 36 bops down th road
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if ya cant handle th looks
dont ride one
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i rode sidecars fr fifteen yrs
i cn handle th looks
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why do we do it ?
buggered if i know
to not run with th pack
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log on to th net and
find
hundreds of kindred souls
lost on a man;s bike
all complaining
are they ever
gunna stop asking
where's your other wheel ?
ppl are so stupid
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girls and guys
all over th world
pushin themselves
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if
i cn just
get to th top of that hill
i'll be content
...
..
..
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south park
'Suck My Balls Mr. G'
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yeah right
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at th top of th hill
is a road
that connects to all other roads
and they circle th continent
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maybe i wanna ride
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The Kinks
'Better Things'
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around th big island
i dunno
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th craving
to go one wheeling
is still so strong
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boot th mp3 player and
climb aboard a solo wheel and
wander down country lanes
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listening to great
one wheelin tunes like
massive attack's
the hymn of the big wheel
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at least this addiction
builds great abs
makes core strength like nobody;s business and
all those bloody smiles on dials
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good karma there
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ride anywhere on one wheel and
feed on th smiles
why is it addictive ?
i wonder
yah i jst ride it
to show off
bt then
i find myself at midnight
toolin down a country lane
singin with joy in my heart and
maybe not
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[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 22:17:44]
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PJ Harvey & Portishead
'Linger'
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zen
and th art of unicycle maintenance
th magic of th wheel
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anything that makes other ppl smile
and smiles are contagious
they make
me
smile
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over 22 yrs in th saddle now
i almost forget
th time when
i could only freemount th unicycle
one time in a hundred
usin a post to get up
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u can do it
if i did
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taming th unicycle
not possible
there's always somethin u havent yet tried
th first time i dropped over a skatebowl wall
heart in my mouth bt
i ws determinded and
well experienced
it should go down this
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it did
i ws lucky
picked th right angle of attack
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bt not always
never ride down a painted wall
my left hip still hurts frm th last fall
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that
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ACDC
'Night Prowler'
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doesnt scare me anymore
he said it ws
about conquering fear
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ok dude
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when th 36 inch overspeeds on me
not havin any brakes
i'll learn some respect fr it
in th meantime
i've only fallen off it once
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strrange
it scares me less
after having fallen off it
experienced unicyclists know why
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like th skatebowl wall
scarier to contemplate than
to go do
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oh and
ride up th wall
and get over th top before
u try ridin down
or not
we all do things different ways
jst sayin
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somewhere
a pretty girl has me in her camera phone
goin over th wall
with me
not even lookin down th wall
starin at th lens
hi there
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when ya get blase
it;s time to switch
been there
done that
ridin a 27 inch unicycle down a moving travellator
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wot crazy ***** havent i tried
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well there is that crazy bugger on you tube
ridin backwards down th stairs
hmm
maybe one day
on th right wheel
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it;s all good
if you live
i know wot i'm doing
i'm living
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i ejaculate
therefore i am
the land surfer
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p.s.
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Violent Femmes
'Dance, *****, Dance!'
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