th arse fell out of th sky
+++
course
in misheard lyrics
it'd be
th arse fell out of this guy
+++
robbie williams and nicole kidman
'somethin stupid'
+++
rip their heads off
and suck their guts out
"it's a weird ad jenny"
+++
ah *****
+++
th boys just came home
he's got a displaced knuckle
+++
ya should be able to
suck their guts out
without rippin their heads off
+++
got quick eyes
that boy sailed thru my door and
sees my new pants
layin there on th floor
fucks me man
i went on a date
in dirty and old clothes and
came home with this bag of clothes
go figure
+++
some active wear
for th unicycle
some jeans
some cutoffs...
+++
laurie anderson
'born, never asked'
+++
hmmm
+++
bout six months ago
i said
th next chick in my life
would have a commodore
car
swear jane had a falcon
since then
she's driven a little honda
but seems now
to be drivin a commodore wagon
needs music babe
sorry i left my axe at home
i bring music maker next time
had other things on my mind
+++
can i go singin tonight ?
"we'll see"
huge storm last night
"good light show for me and th young fella"
+++
no mate
i aint doin
wheelies
in a four cylinder
automatic
even in th rain
+++
bit anticlimactic
after clearing th posts
in town
on th unicycle
"hit about four with th hips"
shavin points
+++
afroman
'she wont let me *****'
+++
not last night
+++
"not complete that track"
<<smiel >>>
she was
+++
U2
'new years day'
+++
fireworks
+++
doin it girl style
with th mad irish redhead
"cept she's blonde again"
+++
i did somethin stupid
"yeah, but not last night"
+++
i'll get th commisioner on th hotline
"We'll see"
+++
"i'd preferr jennifer"
"if th unicycle hit th workshop"
"before puntin it around posts again"
traction was good
"needs a good oiling"
th squeeks were fuckin shockin
+++
mike oldfield
'tubular bells pt 2'
+++
i didnt throw my durries in my pocket
for my dusk blat
thru th city
consequently
i hit th botanic gradens
boppin down th river boardwalk
and went to roll a durrie
on th move
empty pocket
hmm
why
i dont make these
unforced errors without reason
like to stop in th park
or at least slow down and roll a smoke
gotta be a reason
better pick up th pace
arrived back at th car
with th rain spitting
typical
got nicely settled back in th drivers seat and
th arse fell out of th sky
thunderstorm let go and
just snuck that ride in
time to trek to jane's
+++
hmm
he got an auto magic box for th land rover
+++
scuse i
..
..
..
u conveniently
banged up yur hand
guess who
has to help shift th bloody thing out of th trailer
waiting for th call
+++
fuckit
i'll go for th walk
..
..
..
wasnt i readin
that f series bible
yesterday
about broken knuckles
before pickin th young fella up from high school
and finding him with a broken knuckle
"i dont write everything in my diary jennifer"
+++
come with me
why dont you
on a journey thru
synchronciity
+++
lock up torque converter
does that work in four wheel drive mode ?
hmm
+++
it's coming
+++
babel fish me
you get gibberish
"get gibberish anyway"
yeah but it reads th fuckin future
"and breaks a pile of rules"
is how it's done
+++
wendy mathews
'the day you went away'
+++
ya have to figure
i'll be removed
least that's
womble's view
+++
06 destiny
flashed up
on th telly
+++
i dunno telly
+++
but i'm
content
i left a mark
+++
does it ever make ya wonder what's on my mind-lyric
+++
not really
i get too much from ppl's heads
most though
ya cant pick thru th
mishmash
buzzin away in ther subconscious
such
unclear thinkers
no control over their subconscious
what am i thinking ?
th sceptic asks
well...
you really want me to out
all th crap that's
goin on in yur
whole mind
+++
kylie minogue
'after dark'
+++
at th age of
thirteen
we
got together
and had a us a little
psychic experiemnt
kerry couldnt think in colour
but claire could
so together
they decided to send
a green apple
i was the
receiver
hey folks
is it
a green apple
WOW
umm
can we do some more ?
waddya mean ya bored
and it's just a coincidence
i got it
fuckheads
+++
course claire
ya do know
pot is suspected of
increasing
vision and audio
signals
to th brain
my psychic gift
works without th pot
pretty much
averaged one day in two stoned for th last
two week period
sitnorm
trippin over magic
every fuckin where
but claire baby
no-one listens any better than you did
+++
nirvana
'on a plain'
+++
i wouldnt get on a plane
without clearin it thru me
+++
th young fella downstairs
is learnin though
hard to put one past
uncle paulei
th magic seems to
intercede
+++
look inside
reveal yur fears
learn to love yurself
and watch yur gifts grow
+++
if i want my
psychic gifts to grow
i have to
investigate
my female side
and th doctor who
suggested i have a sex change
+++
and th butch
bull *****
lesbian
i was married to at th time
+++
ya;d like jane maree
she fucks like
she's still with a chick
+++
frente
'bizarre love triangle'
+++
so he blames himself
for our fallout
does he know he killed me ?
ok sweetie
we lived together a year and
i dated you and that other chick
for a whiel
at th same time
can i live
with th scent of woman
i'm not fucking
fuckin hypersensitive blue balls
ok then
did he listen to me when i said
***** yur pot
i wanna live
under th house
+++
do re mi
'idiot grin'
+++
ya havent rung her in
months and months
six weeks ago
ya call out of th blue
and rock around
+++
jenny tells ppl
her testicle problem and they
nod up and down but
even if they believe
old habits die hard
+++
how deaf are ya mik ?
thought you said
you had an open mind
+++
now
i'm on a pension for it
least what i call it
they dont make look for work
they got no idea what to do with me
and goin to th hospital
is an exercise in
bad ennough for white ppl man
public health
if th doc thinks i'm black
and 50% do
just liek th population
i'm really gunna get looked after well arent i
+++
th thing about doctors is
they think they know
truth
and base their judgements and calls
on
how they label you
and dont make the
connection
electro ejaculation
+++
instead of ringin my mate up
and
take im home
we dont know what to do with him
+++
the offspring
'americana'
+++
out of th fat
and back into th fire
still getting over th shock of my heart stopping
pain shock
and back in a house
with a chick i'm not fucking
waiting for th kids of th house to
crash
+++
fucking pheremones
+++
yeah little brother
i'm so selfish
five hours in a bath
waiting for
peace from pain
+++
kevin bloody wilson
'wow did i get whacked'
+++
mik did
give me fifty bucks worth of pot
which helped
no end
pleasure's gotta go above pain
two and half years of searchin
later
i find
electro ejaculation
and not from a fucking doctor
+++
if my body goes grey again
if i become grey owl again
i know what to ask for
to ease th pain
i did ask for pot
in th hospital
and
pls dont give me any drugs that will
affect my performance
cant zonk me out
that pressure has to be released
fucking pheremones
+++
i sleep better dude
not as fucked up
found most of
th things i was lookin for
smoek drugs
to block th neuralgic pain
of supersensitive testicles
climb on th unicycle
ride twenty minutes and
comfortably numb
now i can sing to pretty girls
aint their fault
they make my nuts hurt
+++
if ya
succumb
and whack off
three tiems in one day
ya gotta keep it up
th body
acommodates
you just show
how fukin dumb ya are
+++
city high
'you dont know me'
+++
dont fuckin judge me
i'll rip yur head off yur neck
and ***** down yur throat
+++
or like rod
tryin to tell me
not to sit on th warm rock
i had this problem twnety somethin yars
and you fuckheads
know more about it than me do ya ?
everywhere i go
everything i do
always some fuckhead
+++
"like you"
+++
but i still smoek pot
illegally
and pay top dollar
even though
to reach parity
i smoke drugs before conversing
with any woman
you have no right
to affect my body
without my consent
+++
eagle eye cherrry
'are you still having fun'
+++
equality hey
she can spray anything she likes
on her body
and wear
pretty much anything
pls tell me
how passing laws and
writing on bits of paper
is gunna change
pheremones and
highlghted visual sexual signals
wot is lipstick
and blusher
desmond morris says
highlighted and exaggerated sexual signals
+++
hanson
'if only'
+++
least i dont live in china
"or maybe i should"
th ratio of women to men there
so fucked with
a timebomb waiting to happen
+++
"quick legislate"
+++
yeah that fixes everything
+++
"the law makers"
+++
machine gun fellatio
'chase the dragon'
+++
i dont have a normal human viewpoint
i'm not a normal human
+++
more animal
than man
+++
quick
judge me
lock up yur daughters
+++
got laid last night
for th first time in
eighteen months
not a lack of offers
more
this thing doesnt own me
or define me
+++
my unicycle is my wheelchair
i stopped arguin with th city council
i just dont stop anymore
when i cruise thru th mall
public liability they say
+++
orchestral manouvres in the dark
'enola gay'
+++
ya cant fight city hall
they make th rules and
you obey
or pay th fine
these days
if ya dont pay th fine
they take
or set up a payment plan
you pay automatically
they get first whack at yur money
anyone else ya owe
has to front a court
to garnishee yur wages or other asset
+++
we'll impose a
stiff penalty
that'll make em
do as they;re told
+++
the verve
'the drugs dont work'
+++
where is your fucking proof ?
couple of thousand years of human history
i;ve read
does not
support your claims
that passing laws
and writin em down on bits of paper
will make human beings
compliant and
do things your way
+++
runnina round now
we need new
anti terror laws
will that stop em bombin us will it ?
+++
guy on a uni on th telly
+++
pink outfit
you as fucked in th head as i am man
++
he didnt have a helemt on
dont come to brisbane man
i still got one fine outstanding
+++
"it's payin off"
+++
it is not a good thing
to ride a unicycle in brisbane streets
and put smiles on pppl's faces
for some reason
th gummint
wants to regulate th clowns too
+++
and ya cant sing
with an alcoholic beverage
in th strete
th cops pour my drink
into th bin
+++
U2
'the unforgettable fire'
+++
lets see you sing
to a bunch of drunks and drug fucked ppl
after midnight
for five hours
without a fuckin drink
+++
so i cant go singing
"cant afford th drink"
it was worth it
+++
i didnt flick ont h simpsons
was ncie to see
another unicycle
out in th strete
puttin smiles on dials
gotta make yur good karma where ya can
+++
wouldnt wanna do
reversin manpouvres liek that though man
they blow out enough
when i get sideways
goin round th posts
+++
fukin pudknockers
so umm
what year ya got slated
for us to wear safety helmets
while havin a ***** at th trough
+++
laurie anderson
'blue lagoon'
+++
where do you draw the line ?
you cant ride a bicycle
without government
wanting to
legislate
+++
if i have to wear a fucking helemt
to ride my wheel
can you stop me
ridin down steep banks too
caus ehtat's more dangerous to my health than
failing to wear a helmet
oh and
i;ve never understood
th police fascination with helemt wearing
whiel i ride my unicycle
in th rain
in rubber thongs
that slip off th pedals
i've had a cop
pull me up
inth rain
with a sirne no less
on my unicycle
im in thongs and
th only topic of his conversation
is why arent i wearing an approved bicycle helmet
"cause it's not a fucking bicycle ya blind *****"
traffic regs say it is
" I DO NOT RIDE"
"A FUCKING GIRLS BIKE"
"YOU WET CUNTS"
+++
give me a break
if i ride my
one wheeler
in th surf
fuckheads
run out into th surf t knock me down
he wouldnt be so fuckin jealous
and runnin out
to take me out
if i was ridin a fuckin girls bike
in a foot deep
of white water
+++
machine gun fellatio
'***** town'
+++
he's on a skateboard
wearin a helmet
but rollin thru a fire
on sbs telly
now
+++
"stupid gift"
+++
is how ya train it
+++
ridin thru town yesterday
without music in th ears
one guy in th crowd
screamin at me
to ***** offf
cause i'm a circus freak
he in th minority though
heard many more
***** man
that is cool
+++
arlo guthrie
'the motorcycle song'
+++
wot it is
to ride a unisickle
and be good enough to clean th posts
+++
th crowd was thick enough
i got to twist and dive and
warm th body up nicely
jane bent me in
wicked ways last night
everything in it's right place
+++
girls bike on th telly paulie
"mountain bikes"
+++
deborah coleman
'my heart bleeds blue'
+++
ooh it's so masculine
+++
"shutup ya tranny *****"
+++
got me out of my clothes
and into a little
pretty blue sarong
+++
wot a fuckhead
cant catch a frisbee
on a bi cycle
+++
"he gone ***** up"
"on his girls bike"
+++
one girl was
pretty sure i was a chick
from a distance
didnt see th beard i guess
talkin to her friend and
i reeally thoguht that was a chick
naturally
is tuffed it round th post
just after that
nice little tyre slide and
nicely out of shape
and
well caught
who gives a *****
if it was my gay lady friend jennifer ridin
she'd go thru th posts th same
and probly
be as
graceful
dancin along too
+++
ya dance a unicycle
dont you know fucking anything ?
+++
*****
next thing you;ll be telling me
i aint gettin free energy to
drive th flywheel from gravity
+++
sorry
you thought it was a clowns bike
i cant help it
if yur scared of th thing
i'm not
+++
rogue traders
'voodoo child'
+++
it's not a fuckin clowns bike
big fat tyre is for
traction
"doesnt work that way"
+++
lower psi
on th ground
spread over a larger footprint
better slides
+++
"<<< smile >>>"
+++
gorgeous
little chinese girl
out jogging
havent you got a pretty smile
+++
i was well behaved
i kept my shirt on
even with th beard
soem ppl
of all eight sexes
cant tell what sex i am
+++
"or what colour"
+++
my own brother
so ok man
am i black
or white
this week
+++
do re mi
'cuttlefish beach'
+++
why do we remember th negative ?
+++
"over th positve"
+++
..
..
..
went to make a cuppa
and have a yack with th boys
under th land rover
+++
shakespears sister
'i dont care'
+++
"last song jenny"
"we're watchin ned kelly"
"about to start"
+++
pause
+++
little brother bumped into
nicole
my eldest
stepdaughter
today
i spent th night with
my stepsons
took two of em to school this mornin
hey cole
you;ve had a
kid
fifteen months old
he thinks a girl
and my son
andrew
is goin well
first news in
ummm
years
+++
is she livin with th father i asked
any other news dude ?
***** that was hard
oh good
well...
i'm in a good mood today
so th timing is about right
"all round"
+++
i took another ten year old boy to school this morning andrew
and not you
honesty says
cause i cant be in th same room as yur mother
which you wont understand
till it bothers you too
we're not normal mate
puberty lasts forever
kind of a family curse
we live a long time
but in oz
wer'e still waitin for our family's
first natural death
we all die tragically here
in this land
oma "grandmama" back in holland
ashamed as i am to say it
was right
+++
so little dude
you have a good day at school
yur mum
deaf as she is
listens more than th other little boys mum
she wouldnt even listen to th doctors
+++
when will ya grow a brain elizabeth ?
+++
got me fucked with th law
***** th law
th law was never gunna ***** at
when i masturbate about ya
ya ring from kilometers away
and *****
but ya are magic
so ya
deserve my kid on
magic grounds
+++
five years
+++
said your name
when i came
gave her
your birth day
and th hour of yur birth
but she owns you
+++
th women have th babies
+++
they make them
so they tell us
+++
i did throw
my
child support papers in th bin
yesterday
+++
still think we're entitled to some say
+++
bjork
'venus as a boy'
+++
scuse i
adding drugs
..
..
..
so if little brother
bumped into cole today
how long till th pigs land on th door
with another police protection order
no man
i couldnt use that service station
for five years
+++
your name was on it cole
took my kid and
you three as well
and th lions share of th money
laughing all th while
look how many social workers are helping me
screw YOU
+++
ok
+++
i'm patient
i always laugh last
no-one listens to me
+++
dont get on yur motorbike man
pls
i got a bad feeling about it
everyone says i'm psychic
half hour later
yur lyin dead on th road
no head
railway guard rail
taken it clean off
and i'm crying
+++
jewel
'love me, just leave me alone'
+++
never ever
seen my legs spread that far jane
takes some of th edge off
all that psychic *****
th pain and
misery
+++
unbelievable kuta lady
everything is backwards
+++
time has a negative and aopsitive
so when you see th future
before it's happened
it comes in an
oppposite fashion
"less i play with it "
"before it leaves th brain"
better on client side
"i agree"
+++
the black eyed peas
'the apl song'
+++
to see forward
you have to look
backward in time
as well
balance
you have to give
to receive
+++
before th london bombings
th visions were
so
encompassed with so much history
my mind was
darting
forward
and backwards
in time
looking for stability
+++
pirate jenny
'wheel tail monkey'
+++
everything pointed to england
i wrote th page
pirate jenny
seeing a redhaired
queen elizabeth
talking with a pirate
out in th middle of th ocean
+++
july one
i wrote
a bank clipped me
last time
a week later
th terrorist fucks
bombed th twin trade twoers
pls i'm psychic
this means something
it's happened again
on july one
+++
writing about th underground
and led to repost
too much magic bus
another page from
long term memory of my mind
"yur readin it"
"long term memory that is"
just extends past
today
ya dig ?
so no
i was not surprised
when they also bombed
a magic bus
"double decker"
+++
royksopp
'only this moment'
+++
or th underground
+++
just couldnt
bring myself to tell you
th name of th bank
at th time
commonwealth
course
july seven
they bombed london
but i couldnt say
commonwealth
as a clue
from
the oracle of kuta
if i'd said
what i knew
which was
england will be bombed
on or about july seven or eight
i have trouble with dateline
we in different timezones
would you have listened ?
and if you did
listen
and not just talk
your opinion
wouldnt you first suspect
i was tellin em to bomb you
i see what i see
i tell it backwards mostly
why i declaredw ar
on england
july one
check it
is in
shakespeare newsgroup
underground
+++
the offspring
'pretty fly'(for a white guy)
+++
postings from
pepp@cyberdude.com
elizabeth shake a spear
one of my
stranger fictional characters
+++
i know you
know better than i do
cause most of you
tell me that to my face
but it's a dark face
surrounded afro hair and
usually wearin dirty clothes
th unicycle beats th ***** out of clothes
you listen to a black fella ridin a unicycle ?
+++
in australia ?
+++
shakespears sister
'catwoman'
+++
ya ride past ppl
and they say
arent you clever ?
+++
it's a lot easier
to call someone an idiot
than to deal with th fact
that you dont have th balls to do it
deride it
i cant do it
***** ya circus freak
+++
not even close
+++
im a much bigger freak than that
+++
im the biggest freak in th world
+++
how do ya avoid
th cops
drivin into town drunk
and back out again
to go drunken and drug fucked unicycling
"i'm psychic"
+++
one night
one magical night
i rode around th whoel of th city
and never ever
saw anything but a green light
+++
U2
'angel of harlem'
+++
four hours on a unicycle
thru th
nightclubber crowd
and not one
red light
wasnt lookin for it
just happened
+++
as most things have a habit of doing
..
..
..
little black *****
+++
p.s.
city high
'sista'
+++
paulie
"yeah sis"
piratin songs tonight ?
"yeah why not"
"if i start obeyin th rules now"
"i'll break precedent"
+++
i break th rules of time
which i pay for
+++
mortein ad
more smart
more safe
on th telly
NOW
if a fuckin big rock
a meteor
was headin for th pacific basin
i'll b able to warn about it
which makes up
for some of th pain
+++
ok
i'll take a punt
have a go at
takin nostradamus down
and whack up a date
with a prediction
+++
pj harvey
'send his love to me'
+++
listened to yur music and
i listened ot th lyrics
so
my prediction was
a firm date for when
paul mc cartney would die
stuck it in a newsgroup and
nice server electronic record
and sure enough
paul's still alive
are you mad ?
but wait
i'm down under
i watch television live
on thursday down under
of wednesday
up top
next day
paul mc cartney
old fart
randy old fart
has a press conference
hey guess what
WORLD
i'm gunn ahve another baby
"careful mate"
"she owns it"
"she made it dont ya know"
"all on er lonesome"
ah man
classic
psychic world
twisted tail
course
it's all just coincidence
right ?
if ya only look at one
+++
turn yur telly on apulei
any channel
ok dude
plane flyin into th twin trade towers
lookdown at th book i'm reading
tom wolfe
the right stuff
page three
when th plane crashes
and th fuel tanks explode
the human body umm
alright mate
yur not tellin me anythin i dont know
wasnt i screamin about some money seven days ago ?
+++
the black eyed peas
'the boogie that be'
+++
that christopher skase
he such a *****
wont come back to oz
and face th music
i tell ya what chris
i wann tie ya to th bonnet
of a car
and toe ya
hundred mile an hour
down th highway
sure nuff
seven days later
christopher skase
died today
on th telly
tell me somethin i dont fuckin know
+++
bundaberg pissed at you man
no piece of paper save you
+++
it'll look natural
it always does
+++
it's all just coincidence
"roight"
+++
jewel
'standing still'
+++
dont have to sight you physically
or
even have
you know about it
when us black fellas in oz point th bone
we dont ***** around
+++
so ya bombed our kuta beach a second time hey ya cunts
i'm the oracle of kuta
it's th name of our religion
here in oz
bit pissed at you
our religion
named after
ku ta
native stingless bee
honey
but our sting is
elsewhere
i ask my god
hey dude
look into th very soul of th problem will ya
these islamic ***** terrorists
give me a sign
give them a sign
make em ***** their fuckin pants
god style
get up th next morning
huge fuckin earthquake
in northern pakistan
between bin laden hidin in a cave in th hills
and wanderin in and out
free as ya pls
and th schools of
brainwashed kids
i'll take it as a sign
+++
kevin bloody wilson
'stack the fridge'
+++
it's all just coincidence right
or umm
i'm lyin about everything
cept i dont have to
+++
ya cant knock em all
+++
or
i'm just psychic and
a huge shitstirrer
take yur pick
i dont fuckin care
wot you think
i can talk to god
and get a nice
clear
and concise answer
can you ?
+++
kylie minogue
'i feel for you'
+++
asked
my god
a question
a while back
did th english crown
screw th aboriginals
brisbane
got th foulest weather
for that week
OUR WORST WEATHER WEEK
was th headline
in white man;s history
th sky went
fucking green
for six nights
th seventh night
opposite th
edward st pub
signin with dom
and my unicycle
in th strete
a guy in a jesus costume walks up
dances to what dom and i are
singin
while his mate
videos it
and then ya shook my hand
+++
that video's gotta be worth a few
human dollars
+++
"specially if it's dated"
+++
who am i ?
.
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